Do you have adblock enabled?
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Denver Channel)   Shoplifting suspect leaves DNA evidence behind -- his baby daughter   (thedenverchannel.com) divider line 42
    More: Dumbass  
•       •       •

33 clicks; posted to Main » on 15 Apr 2003 at 11:32 AM (12 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



42 Comments   (+0 »)
   

Archived thread
 
2003-04-15 10:19:51 AM  
Dumbass isn't strong enough for this asshat
 
2003-04-15 10:22:01 AM  
How could you leave your daugher behind??? The humanity!!!

Ummm...what's a daugher?
 
2003-04-15 10:29:48 AM  
I wonder why this didn't get the Florida tag?
 
2003-04-15 10:54:46 AM  
"Security cameras in a store in Bonita Springs caught images of a man stealing a DVD player"

I understand completely. It very hard to carry a dvd player and a baby.
 
2003-04-15 11:35:07 AM  
People never cease to amaze me.
 
2003-04-15 11:36:49 AM  
I guess he chose the lessor of 2 evils. Too bad his DVD player is not tax deductable. I bet he didn't think of that
 
2003-04-15 11:36:56 AM  
Now, now, cut the guy some slack. It was Bring Your Daughter to Work Day.
 
2003-04-15 11:37:44 AM  

He probably left the baby girl behind because she would always squeel on him.


I think he was just using the bartering system: a baby for a DVD player. Sounds fair to me.

 
2003-04-15 11:38:03 AM  
He wasn't shoplifting. He was bartering.
 
2003-04-15 11:38:38 AM  
Skinink: Get out of my brain you
 
2003-04-15 11:38:52 AM  
Maybe it was "take a baby, leave a baby" day at the store
 
2003-04-15 11:39:29 AM  
I don't know what's more frightening - that he did this, or that most farkers CAN'T FARKING SPELL the word Daughter.
 
2003-04-15 11:41:39 AM  
You also don't have to feed or clean a DVD player. I think the guy thought about his choice for a while before picking the equipment over the kid.

Of course, he's still a negligent asshat for leaving his daughter there.
 
2003-04-15 11:41:44 AM  
OK, check. Wallet, keys, spectacles, testicles..... oh, sh!t, the baby!
 
2003-04-15 11:42:53 AM  
What the fark was he high on?
 
2003-04-15 11:43:00 AM  
Stupid people breed.
 
2003-04-15 11:46:07 AM  
Cripes! How did they fit that thing on a microscope slide?
 
2003-04-15 11:48:06 AM  
What's worse, leaving the baby behind or beating it up in the parking lot because it foiled your scam like that Irish traveller person?
 
2003-04-15 11:51:28 AM  
was he planning to hide the dvd player in the diaper bag or what? i wonder if he was planning to go out alone and the wife made him take the baby at the last minute.
 
2003-04-15 11:51:59 AM  
Baby DVD Player
==== =========
you entertain entertains you
(advantage)
cost over 50,000 Free
(advantage)
poops Watch boobies
(advantage)

WINNER=DVD
 
2003-04-15 11:55:14 AM  
His baby momma gonna be pissed.
 
2003-04-15 12:00:57 PM  
This is the best FARK headline today.
 
2003-04-15 12:02:00 PM  
I say castrate the bastard!!
 
2003-04-15 12:04:27 PM  
That poor little girl. I say we pray for her.

Moment of Payer, care to do the honors?
 
2003-04-15 12:13:34 PM  
Aeonite writes: I don't know what's more frightening - that he did this, or that most farkers CAN'T FARKING SPELL the word Daughter.

Where do you get "most"? One person misspelled it in the headline, and one commenter made fun of the misspelling.

Oh, wait - you're the "polling firm" that measures presidential approval ratings, aren't you?
 
2003-04-15 12:23:17 PM  

EVELLE: "We done okay. Yessir. This ought to split nicely three ways."
(A thought registers with GALE and EVELLE at the same moment. They look at each other. They both twist frantically to look in the back seat.)
Bellowing:
GALE: "Goddamnit! Ya never leave a man behind!"


[image from cagecorner.com too old to be available]

 
2003-04-15 12:34:22 PM  
Another Florida criminal mastermind at work.
 
2003-04-15 01:09:40 PM  
Today is the day of great headlines.
 
2003-04-15 01:27:48 PM  
Sorry bout the quality, but I'm PS'ed while working
[image from jasontheriault.com too old to be available]
 
2003-04-15 01:28:52 PM  
I don't see what the big deal is all about. If I had a screaming little brat, I'd probably want to exchange it for a DVD player, too.
 
2003-04-15 01:42:49 PM  
STOP BREEDING!
 
2003-04-15 01:47:23 PM  
wow....i'm sad. I got a VCR for my kid and thought THAT was a good deal, But a DVD player...now that's sweet.
 
2003-04-15 02:02:01 PM  
shudders at the thought of the coming listings on E-Bay

0ok
 
2003-04-15 02:03:42 PM  
sweet headline
 
2003-04-15 02:26:11 PM  
Wow, Aeonite sure has a hard-on for typos.
 
2003-04-15 02:48:08 PM  
I hope the cops roughed her up. She was obviously the lookout.
 
2003-04-15 03:28:25 PM  
The headline is great. Witty and not at all complicated
 
2003-04-15 03:45:56 PM  
http://www.nbc-2.com/
Got a blurb about this and his picture.



BONITA SPRINGS Police say a shoplifter got away with a DVD player but left his baby daughter at the store. Target employees took care of the little girl until her mother was located and picked her up from the store. The Lee County sheriff's office says Melvin Negron, 39, was stopped at the store Monday afternoon after a security camera taped him taking the DVD player. But Negron fled before he could be arrested, leaving the six-month old in a cart on the sidewalk in front of the store. He is wanted on charges of shoplifting and felony child neglect, and is still on the loose. If convicted, Negron faces a maximum penalty of more than five years in prison. If you have any information on Negron's whereabouts, call CrimeStoppers at (800) 780-TIPS.
 
2003-04-15 03:52:43 PM  
 
2003-04-15 05:22:37 PM  
Wow - my cold medicine blended those last two headlines together - I thought it said "Customers leave interesting DNA evidence behind on Kinko's copying machines."

Ewwww.
 
2003-04-15 08:21:21 PM  
No fathers day card this year for this sperm doner.
 
2003-04-22 04:47:30 AM  
 
Displayed 42 of 42 comments



This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »
Advertisement
On Twitter





In Other Media


  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.

Report