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(Letterman)   Top 10 things Iraq's Information Minister has to say about the war   ( divider line
    More: Amusing  
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119 clicks; posted to Main » on 11 Apr 2003 at 3:02 PM (14 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

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2003-04-11 08:49:55 AM  
"There were only three things I said! Ten things is an infidel lie!"
2003-04-11 08:57:59 AM  
what are they talking about, there is no Letterman or a top ten list of anything except the ways Iraq is winning the war

/Baghdad Bob
2003-04-11 09:13:07 AM  
Comical Ali is beginning the slippery slope of overkill that Bubb Rubb experienced.

"Those aren't the whistles you are hearing. Those are the sounds of the infidels committing suicide under the walls of Oakland. God will roast their stomachs in hell for decorayshuns.."
2003-04-11 10:09:56 AM  
Baghdad Bob has a future in the Simpsons. He could be Sideshow Bob's accomplice.
2003-04-11 10:13:07 AM  
"The Republican Guard has taken Chicago, Pittsburg, and Cleveland"
2003-04-11 10:28:15 AM  
"Why did my mother not love me? Why she threw me to jackals in a failed attempt to eat my stomach before it roasted in hell I do not know."
2003-04-11 11:22:25 AM  
Farker did it far better.
2003-04-11 11:29:57 AM  
Geez, I already had a peeing of the pants problem with yesterday's thread. Better grab a Depends for this one!
2003-04-11 11:39:52 AM  
His actual statements are much funnier than anything the Letterman writing staff could come up with.

(I think we are all in agreeance about that.)
2003-04-11 12:44:40 PM  
I, uh... agree ...with SuburbanCowboy.

Baghdad Bob is somewhere having plastic surgery. Not to disguise himself, but because he tore up all his facial muscles trying to say that shiat while keeping a straight face.

That's why his jaw muscles and eyes were always bulging out.
2003-04-11 02:29:56 PM  
could you imagine what those meetings were like when they put those speechs together.
"c'mon you're not serious right, I can't say these things, look the US marines are working the cameras and you want me to say they're nowhere need Baghdad?"
2003-04-11 03:07:03 PM  
Trunks I imagined the meetings including some shots of Jack, and a lil bit of crack smoking.
2003-04-11 03:07:38 PM  
I bet he gets lots of chicks with that silver tounge of his though.

Maybe not.
Ant [TotalFark]
2003-04-11 03:08:59 PM  
Tonight's Guests : Kate Winslet

Ooooooh, Kate Winslet.... mmmmmmmmmm......
2003-04-11 03:09:09 PM  
SuburbanCowboy -- That's not setting the bar very high. :)
2003-04-11 03:09:25 PM  
[image from too old to be available]
Lies! These are all lies!
2003-04-11 03:09:46 PM  
gg Letterman. Thats the first time I chuckled at a top ten list in about a decade.
2003-04-11 03:09:57 PM  
Poor Minister Magoo...
2003-04-11 03:09:59 PM  

I could use this guy the next time I bring a girl home, before we start to have sex:
"Skinink does NOT have blisters on his penis, neither does he have herpes ! That is not pus you see on his underwear, nor Herpes medication on his dresser ! He is disease free !"

[image from too old to be available]

2003-04-11 03:11:38 PM  
I really miss this guy. He was the comedy relief part of the war!!!
2003-04-11 03:11:38 PM  
King of obvious lies indeed

Im sure his wife loves him.
"You have a very nice behind"
"I never look at other women"
"you are so tight" etc etc
2003-04-11 03:12:21 PM  
what? nothing about the evil Zionist entity creating an immortality potion and then not sharing it with anyone after they invented tornados?

(i would have Conan's children, Uterus or no uterus)
2003-04-11 03:12:36 PM  
well...number 9 seems pretty accurate
2003-04-11 03:12:51 PM  
Oh please.

I'm being agreeable with WW and SuburbanCowboy.
2003-04-11 03:13:46 PM  
I think he has a real future in the used car business!
2003-04-11 03:14:12 PM  
Legman: I was thinking he could replace Brak on Space Ghost Coast-to-Coast.
2003-04-11 03:15:16 PM  
C'mon Bob, you old barrel of piss! Come out of that tunnel you're hiding in...I'll take you to Thank Allah It's Friday and buy you a cold one!
2003-04-11 03:16:07 PM  
seriously, we should not be killing the members of Saddam's government, we should be giving them their own prime time network sitcom. They're some of the most entertaining people I've ever seen. And it would give more fodder to the "America is just like Rome and look what happened to them" folks.
2003-04-11 03:16:08 PM  
His Top 10 is funnier than anything from Letterman...

"The authority of the civil defense ... issued a warning to the civilian population not to pick up any of those pencils because they are booby traps."

"They're not even [within] 100 miles [of Baghdad]. They are not in any place. They hold no place in Iraq. This is an illusion ... they are trying to sell to the others an illusion."

"Iraq will not be defeated. Iraq has now already achieved victory - apart from some technicalities."

"They tried to bring a small number of tanks and personnel carriers in through al-Durah but they were surrounded and most of their infidels had their throats cut."

"We made them drink poison last night and Saddam Hussein's soldiers and his great forces gave the Americans a lesson which will not be forgotten by history. Truly."

"I can say, and I am responsible for what I am saying, that they have started to commit suicide under the walls of Baghdad. We will encourage them to commit more suicides quickly."

"Their infidels are committing suicide by the hundreds on the gates of Baghdad. Be assured, Baghdad is safe, protected."

"NO", snapped Mr al-Sahaf, "We have retaken the airport. There are NO Americans there. I will take you there and show you. IN ONE HOUR!"

"Today we slaughtered them in the airport. They are out of Saddam International Airport. The force that was in the airport, this force was destroyed."

" accusing us of executing British soldiers. We want to tell him that we have not executed anybody. They are either killed in battle, most of them get killed because they are cowards anyway, the rest they just get captured."
2003-04-11 03:16:08 PM  
Also funny, Donald Rumsfeld; "Looting is a normal phase."
2003-04-11 03:18:33 PM  
2003-04-11 03:19:36 PM

is pretty good but they don't have their DNS set up yet so you have to check 'em out @

(link via The Register)
2003-04-11 03:19:57 PM  
I think Saddam was down in a cave laughing his ass off while he was transmitting that nonsense to the hidden mike on the Info Minister?

*snort* "Now tell them all the Marines are bursting into flames upon entering the city!" *chuckle*snort* "Remind them I have mystical powers!" *guffaw*
2003-04-11 03:20:09 PM  
[image from too old to be available]
2003-04-11 03:21:22 PM  
I think the citizens of Baghdad started to loose faith in his 'information' when they could no longer hear the TV because of the tanks driving down the street.
2003-04-11 03:21:28 PM guys have it all wrong. He isn't LYING...he's using Jedi mind tricks!
[image from too old to be available]
"These aren't the droids you're looking for."
"You don't need to see identification."
"He can go about his business...move along."
2003-04-11 03:22:40 PM  
[image from too old to be available]
2003-04-11 03:23:43 PM  
[image from too old to be available]
2003-04-11 03:24:11 PM  
Hey, I don't know much about this guy, but it sounds like he's the kind of person who would say things like, "we had to kill them in order to say them", "The war in Vietnam is winnable", "Tet is their new years, they would never attack then" or even sell arms to the Shah of Iran and then boldfacedly tell Congress that you believe you are a patriot.

HAHA, an American would never blindly follow orders. Stupid non-white, non-christian person.
2003-04-11 03:24:39 PM  
If you think Baghdad Bob was rich, you should check out the Syrian news agency Al-Thawra:​h.htm
2003-04-11 03:25:23 PM  
Ladies and gentlemen, a new cliché as born

2003-04-11 03:25:43 PM  

Posted this in another thread yesterday, but for those who haven't seen it, you should check out Day By Day's strip on Baghdad Bob at:

Then click on April 9.

2003-04-11 03:30:38 PM  

nuff said
2003-04-11 03:36:07 PM  
There was nothing in that list that came remotely close to eliciting even a muted chuckle from me. Just another reason why the Late Show and David Letterman should be yanked off the air.
2003-04-11 03:36:49 PM  
[image from too old to be available]
2003-04-11 03:38:08 PM  
Link for Bass555.
2003-04-11 03:40:23 PM  
IamGod2u - Those are hilarious.
2003-04-11 03:40:25 PM  
Psychonun, that's hilarious.
2003-04-11 03:46:48 PM  
This website does not exist. That infidel squirrel with the big nuts has been killed by our mighty troops. All your clichés are belong to us! Drew has been beaten back with the bottom of a shoe.
2003-04-11 03:47:13 PM  
I'm not amused.
And YOU were hoping I said OMGWTFBBQ, but no.
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