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(ABC)   Perp sets fire to NJ bowling alley and splits, gutting the building; rival bowling alley owner charged, but he says he's being framed. If convicted, could face harsh sentence because this will be his third strike   (abcnews.go.com) divider line 60
    More: Dumbass  
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2374 clicks; posted to Main » on 21 Jan 2010 at 2:21 PM (5 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



60 Comments   (+0 »)
   

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2010-01-21 09:24:44 AM  
You missed the word "pin" or variation thereof. Subby just didn't have the balls to pick up all the puns and made himself look like a turkey.
 
2010-01-21 09:29:12 AM  
I'm on pins and needles waiting to hear how this ends.
 
2010-01-21 09:43:08 AM  
Well, there's still another bowling alley in Cumberland County. They obviously had a spare.
 
2010-01-21 09:45:49 AM  
strothgar: Subby just didn't have the balls to pick up all the puns and made himself look like a turkey.


Get your mind out of the gutter.
 
2010-01-21 09:56:30 AM  
Subby is a turkey
 
2010-01-21 10:15:49 AM  
strothgar: You missed the word "pin" or variation thereof. Subby just didn't have the balls to pick up all the puns and made himself look like a turkey.

You have to a few spare puns for the commenters to pick up.
 
2010-01-21 10:16:28 AM  
leave a few spare puns, that is.
 
2010-01-21 10:37:12 AM  
Nobody farks with de Jesus.
 
2010-01-21 10:37:23 AM  
DjangoStonereaver: Subby is a turkey

Came to say this.
 
2010-01-21 11:16:36 AM  
Deuced if they'll ever pin this on the owner, but when they catch the dodo who started the fire, that monkey will get 7-10.
 
2010-01-21 11:24:38 AM  
over the line! i'm sorry, that's a foul. mark it zero
 
2010-01-21 11:49:14 AM  
If he beats the charge, he'll be the kingpin in town. Otherwise, I expect he'll be kicked to the gutter.
 
2010-01-21 12:04:20 PM  
could face harsh sentence because this will be his 3rd strike

That comment is a home-run subby. Nice bowling pun.
 
2010-01-21 12:17:18 PM  
We really could have been spared this thread.
 
2010-01-21 01:05:20 PM  
Alley can think about on this thread is how to keep the puns rolling.
 
2010-01-21 01:27:54 PM  
The building that burned down, mark it zero.
 
2010-01-21 02:24:30 PM  
beer frame!
 
2010-01-21 02:30:20 PM  
Is 300 his favorite movie?
 
2010-01-21 02:31:36 PM  
Did anyone check to see what condition his condition was in?
 
2010-01-21 02:31:50 PM  
DjangoStonereaver: Subby is a turkey

That.
 
2010-01-21 02:35:30 PM  
Wonder if perp will get charged for not returning the lane shoes
 
2010-01-21 02:36:35 PM  
The article included this father's defense of his son:

Manzano's father, also named Felix Manzano, said he didn't think his son, an electrician, would do anything like burn down a bowling alley.

"He's stupid, but he's not that stupid," the elder Manzano said.
 
2010-01-21 02:36:44 PM  
ghall3: Did anyone check to see what condition his condition was in?

Did any one stop in to...

GAH! I hate you with the fire of a thousand suns!
 
2010-01-21 02:37:10 PM  
He's going to get his hole re-drilled too.
 
2010-01-21 02:39:47 PM  
Pump_ThePurpleWarrior: ghall3: Did anyone check to see what condition his condition was in?

Did any one stop in to...

GAH! I hate you with the fire of a thousand suns!


Looks like you struck out.
 
2010-01-21 02:40:20 PM  
Lane attempt at a laugh, subby.
 
2010-01-21 02:40:50 PM  
Meh...The whole thing smacks of effort.
 
2010-01-21 02:42:09 PM  
"Fault" could have been worked in very easily.

(Arbitrary number less than 10) / 10
 
2010-01-21 02:42:41 PM  
Well, I'm hooked.
 
2010-01-21 02:43:45 PM  
Any hope for the Creedence?
 
2010-01-21 02:44:48 PM  
DSEILXYC
The article included this father's defense of his son:

Manzano's father, also named Felix Manzano, said he didn't think his son, an electrician, would do anything like burn down a bowling alley.

"He's stupid, but he's not that stupid," the elder Manzano said.


Came here to point out this. If the father is capable of admitting a son's stupidity, the kid probably IS that stupid.
 
2010-01-21 02:47:15 PM  
That could have been so much cleaner, Subby

Fire gutters bowling alley. Perp splits, ball dropped on rival owner; claims he's been framed. Won't be spared if convicted due to 3rd strike

Lenny is not amused by these antics.

"Miss! Miss! I paid $7.10 for this split. Spare me your gutter mouth."
 
2010-01-21 02:48:59 PM  
Just give him a break.
 
2010-01-21 02:51:17 PM  
Bowlers have remained loyal since the fire, stopping by the lanes and milling about the parking lot.

This made me laugh. I figured showing their loyalty would involve: taking up a collection for the owners, helping with rebuilding, forming a lynch mob to get the perps, etc. But no, they are showing their loyalty by "milling about the parking lot."
 
2010-01-21 02:52:42 PM  
Doesn't capitalism dictate that you must burn your competition to the ground?
 
2010-01-21 02:53:32 PM  
Ok...who gets the beer frame?
 
2010-01-21 02:56:01 PM  
Nobody farks with the Jesus.
 
2010-01-21 02:56:41 PM  
Subby is obviously not a golfer.
 
2010-01-21 03:14:53 PM  
Bijin: Nobody farks with the Jesus.

www.moviecritic.com.au
 
2010-01-21 03:17:33 PM  
PhoenixInFlames: Came here to point out this.

Grammar Nazi approves.
 
2010-01-21 03:17:40 PM  
Subby Score

+8 Halfway decent title
-1 not using 'pin'
-1 gutting = guttering
-1 turkey
-5 not making a reference to being Munson'd (Movie Kingpin)
------------------------------------------------------------
...Well ya broke even....
 
2010-01-21 03:18:37 PM  
"Perp sets fire to NJ bowling alley and splits, gutting the building; rival bowling alley owner charged, but he says he's being framed. If convicted, could face harsh sentence because this will be his 3rd strike "

7/10
 
2010-01-21 03:19:49 PM  
Firefly4F4: That could have been so much cleaner, Subby

Fire gutters bowling alley. Perp splits, ball dropped on rival owner; claims he's been framed. Won't be spared if convicted due to 3rd strike


+1. Much more concise. You could have fit in something about the guy getting violated by a pin when he gets sent to PMITA prison.
 
2010-01-21 03:22:41 PM  
I'm hooked. Lob another one!

/on second thought, someone hit the reset!!
 
2010-01-21 03:23:03 PM  
api.ning.com

I'd oil her lane.

/What, all the *good* puns are gone
 
2010-01-21 03:30:22 PM  
Looks like the perp ditched the flare before he fouled.

/my puns don't have enough spin on them
//loved the headline subby
 
2010-01-21 03:40:45 PM  
What fun is it if you hog all the puns in the headline? This thread started in the gutter.
 
2010-01-21 03:43:03 PM  
Three strikes against him? What a turkey!

(There...)
 
2010-01-21 03:44:18 PM  
Hey, this isn't Nam. There are rules!
 
2010-01-21 04:09:21 PM  
Perp sets fire to NJ bowling alley and splits, gutting the building; rival bowling alley owner charged, but he says he's being framed. If convicted, could face harsh sentence because this will be his 3rd strike Turkey.
 
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