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(NPR)   Satan writes a letter to Pat Robertson   (npr.org) divider line 185
    More: Followup  
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29375 clicks; posted to Main » on 16 Jan 2010 at 7:36 AM (4 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2010-01-16 08:23:11 AM
This has been probably one of the most mature responses I've seen from inside Christianity to Mr. Pat Link (new window)
 
2010-01-16 08:24:32 AM
Retards everywhere rejoice!

/This is just stoopid from every angle.
//Both "sides" full of tards.
 
2010-01-16 08:26:39 AM
That letter was horribly written and farking retarded.
 
2010-01-16 08:27:14 AM
I have no reason to troll this thread. You all receive a pass.
 
2010-01-16 08:27:42 AM
So full of win. That is how you express your views with an IQ, and not come across as a Douche.
 
2010-01-16 08:28:12 AM
That letter:

i361.photobucket.com
 
2010-01-16 08:29:47 AM
StaleCoffee: The letter was inane and uninspired. The only reason it's lauded at all is because it was insulting a prick richly deserving of it.

If you're going to write as the devil, be a little more eloquent. "Big mean bully"? Christ.


I think it was meant as a joke. I don't think Lilly Coyle of Minneapolis was attempting to trick Pat Robertson into thinking Satan was actually attempting to correspond with him.
 
2010-01-16 08:30:11 AM
StaleCoffee: The letter was inane and uninspired. The only reason it's lauded at all is because it was insulting a prick richly deserving of it.

If you're going to write as the devil, be a little more eloquent. "Big mean bully"? Christ.


Harsh words as far as Minnesota goes, my friend.

/not minneapolis, of course
 
2010-01-16 08:31:02 AM
Excellent.
 
2010-01-16 08:31:49 AM
Shenanigans!: StaleCoffee: The letter was inane and uninspired. The only reason it's lauded at all is because it was insulting a prick richly deserving of it.

If you're going to write as the devil, be a little more eloquent. "Big mean bully"? Christ.

I think it was meant as a joke. I don't think Lilly Coyle of Minneapolis was attempting to trick Pat Robertson into thinking Satan was actually attempting to correspond with him.


"Hello?... H-hello?"
/obscure?
 
2010-01-16 08:33:52 AM
"HAI GUIZE IM GONNA WRITE A LETTUR TO A BAD MAN!!1"
 
2010-01-16 08:35:20 AM
Modified Cornstarch: This has been probably one of the most mature responses I've seen from inside Christianity to Mr. Pat Link (new window)

Why does an absolutely insane statement deserve a mature response?

"You are a farking fruitcake!" is all he deserves.
 
2010-01-16 08:36:02 AM
Pat Robertson's real name is Screwtape.
 
2010-01-16 08:37:02 AM
flannelcat: That letter was horribly written and farking retarded.

Of course it is dear. Care to write a better one and share it with us?
 
2010-01-16 08:37:03 AM
Shenanigans!:

I think it was meant as a joke. I don't think Lilly Coyle of Minneapolis was attempting to trick Pat Robertson into thinking Satan was actually attempting to correspond with him.

News letter, yadda, yadda, yadda.

/LOL
 
2010-01-16 08:38:47 AM
Pete: I've always wondered, what's the devil look like?
Ulysses Everett McGill: Well, there are all manner of lesser imps and demons, Pete, but the great Satan hisself is red and scaly with a bifurcated tail, and he carries a hay fork.
Tommy Johnson: Oh, no. No, sir. He's white, as white as you folks, with empty eyes and a big hollow voice. He likes to travel around with a mean old hound. That's right
 
2010-01-16 08:40:34 AM
Ikam: Of course it is dear. Care to write a better one and share it with us?

Dear Pat,

You are a hateful bastard. EABOD and DIAF.

Sincerely,

Someone who actually exists
 
2010-01-16 08:47:18 AM
Shenanigans!: StaleCoffee: The letter was inane and uninspired. The only reason it's lauded at all is because it was insulting a prick richly deserving of it.

If you're going to write as the devil, be a little more eloquent. "Big mean bully"? Christ.

I think it was meant as a joke. I don't think Lilly Coyle of Minneapolis was attempting to trick Pat Robertson into thinking Satan was actually attempting to correspond with him.


That would have been way more awesome.
 
2010-01-16 08:53:38 AM
Outstanding!

i185.photobucket.com
 
2010-01-16 08:53:44 AM
7wolf: Shenanigans!: StaleCoffee: The letter was inane and uninspired. The only reason it's lauded at all is because it was insulting a prick richly deserving of it.

If you're going to write as the devil, be a little more eloquent. "Big mean bully"? Christ.

I think it was meant as a joke. I don't think Lilly Coyle of Minneapolis was attempting to trick Pat Robertson into thinking Satan was actually attempting to correspond with him.

That would have been way more awesome.


In related news, "Lilly Coyle" sounds like the name of a rare flower.
 
2010-01-16 08:53:46 AM
Can't believe none of you have posted HijiNKS Ensue yet.

hijinksensue.com

/For Shame, for shame farkers.
 
2010-01-16 08:56:03 AM
StaleCoffee: The letter was inane and uninspired. The only reason it's lauded at all is because it was insulting a prick richly deserving of it.

If you're going to write as the devil, be a little more eloquent. "Big mean bully"? Christ.


The devil was addressing King Tard Robertson, so of course he had to use easy words. Eloquence would have been a waste of time.
 
2010-01-16 08:56:20 AM
Better to rule in Haiti then serve in Heaven
 
2010-01-16 08:56:58 AM
StaleCoffee: The letter was inane and uninspired. The only reason it's lauded at all is because it was insulting a prick richly deserving of it.

If you're going to write as the devil, be a little more eloquent. "Big mean bully"? Christ.


You waste too much energy tossing around "effect" words like they're manhole covers.
I'm sure your stuff would be fun to slog through.

Seriously bro, who talks like that?
 
2010-01-16 08:58:01 AM
haddie: 7wolf: Shenanigans!: StaleCoffee: The letter was inane and uninspired. The only reason it's lauded at all is because it was insulting a prick richly deserving of it.

If you're going to write as the devil, be a little more eloquent. "Big mean bully"? Christ.

I think it was meant as a joke. I don't think Lilly Coyle of Minneapolis was attempting to trick Pat Robertson into thinking Satan was actually attempting to correspond with him.

That would have been way more awesome.

In related news, "Lilly Coyle" sounds like the name of a rare flower.


Requires level 475 herbalism.
 
2010-01-16 08:58:39 AM
Was the letter smelling of brimstone? Was the parchment it was written on made from the flayed skin of Cassius, Brutus or Judas Iscariot? Hell, was it written in BLOOD? NO? Didn't think so...

/I know a troll when I see on, you betcha.
 
2010-01-16 09:00:36 AM
Dear Jerry,

This doesn't look like much fun:
img94.imageshack.us

But this on the other hand...
img196.imageshack.us


love,
slave2grind

/just sayin
 
2010-01-16 09:01:22 AM
Modified Cornstarch: This has been probably one of the most mature responses I've seen from inside Christianity to Mr. Pat Link (new window)

Here's that "maturity".

"Theologically, what we all deserve is death, and Christ paid that for us."

In other words, everybody in the world deserves to die because some woman, made out of a rib, ate the wrong piece of magical fruit. But the Son of God (who is actually God) temporarily died, so that makes it all better if you telepathically tell him you accept his "sacrifice".

That's so much less crazy than Pat.
 
2010-01-16 09:01:43 AM
Anodos:

"Hello?... H-hello?"
/obscure?


Chad?
 
2010-01-16 09:04:38 AM
0Icky0: In other words, everybody in the world deserves to die because some woman, made out of a rib, ate the wrong piece of magical fruit. But the Son of God (who is actually God) temporarily died, so that makes it all better if you telepathically tell him you accept his "sacrifice".

Don't forget that this all supreme all knowing being KNEW in advance that this would happen.... AND DID IT ANYWAY.

"Look but don't touch. Touch, but don't taste. Taste, don't swallow. Ahaha. And while you're jumpin' from one foot to the next, what is he doing? He's laughin' His sick, farkin' ass off! He's a tight-ass! He's a SADIST! He's an absentee landlord! Worship that? NEVER! "
 
2010-01-16 09:04:52 AM
HAHAHAH! That was some serious "SUCK ON IT, F#CKTARD!"... That was so good it made my n!pples hard.
 
2010-01-16 09:08:45 AM
Whoops... i meant "dear pat"

4.bp.blogspot.com

/i must be going now.
 
2010-01-16 09:09:22 AM
If only...
img340.imageshack.us
 
2010-01-16 09:12:21 AM
0Icky0: In other words, everybody in the world deserves to die because some woman, made out of a rib, ate the wrong piece of magical fruit. But the Son of God (who is actually God) temporarily died, so that makes it all better if you telepathically tell him you accept his "sacrifice".


Hmmmmmmmmm.
Go on...
 
2010-01-16 09:19:38 AM
TsarTom: Hmmmmmmmmm.
Go on...


At the end of the book, this guy comes back and kills everybody who hasn't telepathically told him that they love him.
 
2010-01-16 09:21:42 AM
Superjoe: Pat Robertson's real name is Screwtape.

this
 
2010-01-16 09:22:50 AM
Robertson, "Get behind me Satan!"
Satan, "Oh, I am Pat, I am..."
 
2010-01-16 09:26:26 AM
If people could move beyond a Sunday School understanding of "God" as being a male person with super powers, who goes around randomly smiting and blessing people, but consider God as a power of love in this world, the world would be a saner place.

If people could move beyond a Sunday School understanding of the Hebrew and Christian scriptures as a factual account of the world, and consider them a collection of stories, myths, some history, poetry, and parables that detail the way ancient people tried to make sense of the Great Unknown in their lives, the world would be a saner place.

/and kinder.
/apparently too much to ask.
//sigh.
 
2010-01-16 09:33:59 AM
Religion is bunk. Now please move along.
 
2010-01-16 09:34:29 AM
I read it in this guy's voice.

unrealitymag.com
 
2010-01-16 09:38:08 AM
unheatedgarage: I read that in the voice of the devil from "The Labrynth", so it was all that much better.

You mean "Legend". There was no "devil" in Labrynth. Only sweet, sweet Jennifer Connelly.

I'm assuming you meant Tim Curry.
 
2010-01-16 09:40:00 AM
Just hours after saying that God was punishing Haiti for making a "pact with the Devil," televangelist Pat Robertson retracted the statement, telling TV viewers, "Haiti? I thought they said 'Hades.'"

Link (new window)

Classy Pat, you sack of shiat.

/Srsly, why wasn't this greenlit?
 
2010-01-16 09:40:59 AM
Sass-O-Rev: If people could move beyond a Sunday School understanding of "God" as being a male person with super powers, who goes around randomly smiting and blessing people, but consider God as a power of love in this world, the world would be a saner place.

Why not just consider Love as a power of love in the world?
 
2010-01-16 09:44:28 AM
ahhhhhhhhhhhhh you have to love a religion that has such cognitive dissonance as to preach the virtue of abstinence as 100% effective despite its adherents' core belief that a virgin got pregnant...
 
2010-01-16 09:45:40 AM
This brings up the question about what other celebrities have obviously made a pact with the devil in return for fame and fortune. The obvious criterion: a total lack of talent or good looks nevertheless resulting in obscene good fortune. Nicholas Cage and Tori Spelling don't count since they got where they are through family connections, but I would have to say Bruce Willis got his start this way. Also, Demi Moore.
 
2010-01-16 09:47:01 AM
He should've waited for a huge earthquake to strike San Fransisco. This his remarks would be true.
 
2010-01-16 09:51:43 AM
greentea1985: The trolls on FARK need to learn from this. This is how you properly flame someone. The insults are wonderful and require an IQ.

Shut up biatch! You can't tell me how to internet!
 
2010-01-16 09:55:42 AM
ima turkey: You're either a troll or a grape-brained milliwit.

I'm going to opt for a little of both.
 
2010-01-16 10:06:14 AM
Not being American, or in America, I only have a hazy idea of who this Robertson creature is. Yet, even I know that's some funny shiat, subby. Well done.

Godscrack, I went back and read it with the backgroung music and it's even funnier. I thank you.
 
2010-01-16 10:12:15 AM
sharetv.org
The guy on the left. That voice.
 
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