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(BusinessWeek)   Chavez declares whale sperm, pickles, and codeine essential items. Citzens must also wear their underwear on the outside of their pants   (businessweek.com) divider line 92
    More: Strange, Hugo Chavez, exchange rates, Venezuelans, share prices, toothpaste, yogurt, Caracas, Colgate-Palmolive Co.  
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8410 clicks; posted to Main » on 14 Jan 2010 at 4:47 PM (4 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2010-01-14 03:57:31 PM
sperm, pickles, and codeine


upload.wikimedia.org
 
2010-01-14 04:17:17 PM
WOW...he's nutty enough to win Harry Reids seat next term.
 
2010-01-14 04:27:50 PM
Although I agree on the img1.fark.net,
They left off a crucial detail.
I just have to ask:
Who shoulders the task
Of having to stroke off the whale?
 
2010-01-14 04:44:17 PM
Billy Ligue: sperm, pickles, and codeine

Name three essential elements of Saturday night.

/got nuthin'
 
2010-01-14 04:50:33 PM
Viva la whale sperm!
 
2010-01-14 04:51:47 PM
Billy Ligue: sperm, pickles, and codeine

Item found in Barack Obama's secret vault?
 
2010-01-14 04:51:57 PM
Citzens must also wear their underwear on the outside of their pants

www.cachecoins.org

Approves.


/saves on laundry bills
 
2010-01-14 04:52:03 PM
"I walked behind this guy the other day. A homeless guy asked him for money. He looks right at the homeless guy and says why don't you go get a job you bum. People always say that to homeless guys like it is so easy. This homeless guy was wearing his underwear outside his pants. Outside his pants. I'm guessing his resume isn't all up to date. I'm predicting some problems during the interview process. I'm pretty sure even McDonalds has a "underwear goes inside the pants" policy.

Not that they enforce it really strictly, but technically I'm sure it is on the books."
 
2010-01-14 04:52:58 PM
"And also, children under 16 years old... are now 16 years old!"
 
2010-01-14 04:53:05 PM
People wash their hair with whale sperm?
 
2010-01-14 04:53:20 PM
What I really fear here is that Chavez believes his own hype. He seems to be just coming up with 'ideas' and immediately implementing them because they seem good in his own mind.

There are going to be some serious unintended consequences involved here and the black market is going to be huge.
 
2010-01-14 04:54:51 PM
Harvesting whale sperm for shampoo. That has got to be one of the world's worst jobs...or at least weirdest.
 
2010-01-14 04:55:15 PM
Der Weinerschnitzel stock holders smile.
 
2010-01-14 04:56:20 PM
In before "ZOMG HUGO CHAVEZ, HERO OF LIBTARDS AND OBAMANITES EVERYWHERE!!!1!" or any variation thereupon.
 
2010-01-14 04:56:32 PM
BUSH DECLARES WAR ON TERROR
i777.photobucket.com
 
2010-01-14 04:56:33 PM
Chavez isn't just gay. He's interspecies gay.
 
2010-01-14 04:56:48 PM
MaxxLarge: Although I agree on the [fail],
They left off a crucial detail.
I just have to ask:
Who shoulders the task
Of having to stroke off the whale?


Nicely done.
 
2010-01-14 04:58:04 PM
I'll take "Famous Trios" for $1000 Alex.
 
2010-01-14 04:58:13 PM
I'm cornfused. What... but, he... seriously?
uhmmm....
mommy??????
 
2010-01-14 04:58:24 PM
Reading BusinessWeek to learn about Chavez is like reading Mein Kamph to learn about jews.
 
2010-01-14 04:59:35 PM
Serious question for serious times. What is the purpose behind this? Is this just a lunatic thing? Or is there a method to his madness? Like making money for some friends or to piss somebody off?
 
2010-01-14 05:00:29 PM
I believe that the whale sperm harvesting basically involves following the whale pods and capturing it floating in the ocean behind them.
 
2010-01-14 05:01:19 PM
Almareth: Harvesting whale sperm for shampoo. That has got to be one of the world's worst jobs...or at least weirdest.

i49.tinypic.com

In this photo, researchers unlock the secrets of whale spooge.
 
2010-01-14 05:01:56 PM
whenever chavez does absolutely anything every newspiece on it is "ZOMG HES A WANK" and yet he never gets overthrown and the country kefps on truckin on.

I wonder what the agenda is here...
 
2010-01-14 05:02:08 PM
FOOLS ! ULTRON DOES NOT NEED SHAMPOO SO THE LAUGHING YOU HEAR IS AT YOU !
 
2010-01-14 05:02:13 PM
No pics of Hot Venezuelan girls on this thread?
 
2010-01-14 05:04:17 PM
sonofslacker


It's a money thing. The two tiered exchange rate allows for corruption in all sorts of manners.


On another note, we haven't heard somebody change the subject by attacking the US about something, as is usually the case. Perhaps the coffee house revolutionaries are all off at some protest somewhere.

 
2010-01-14 05:04:21 PM
FTFA:Whale sperm is used in hair products including shampoo.

Well, looks like it's time to shave my head.
 
2010-01-14 05:04:34 PM
spermaceti, Daniel FailCancel, not actual whale sperm.
And probably the vegetable oil derived equivalent, as we don't really take many sperm whales these days.
 
2010-01-14 05:04:35 PM
Billy Ligue: sperm, pickles, and codeine

a thrill, a dill, and a pill.

JC
 
2010-01-14 05:05:13 PM
To CrankMyBlueSax,
LOL That reminds me of all those repeats of Double Dare I saw when I was little. :) That was one odd gameshow...but somehow I can imagine the contestants on that show being traumatized and growing up to be whale sperm harvesters.
 
2010-01-14 05:06:39 PM
thelakattack.com

Approves.
 
2010-01-14 05:07:35 PM
www.virginmedia.com

whale sperm for shampoo???
 
2010-01-14 05:10:31 PM
It looks like Chavez, Pat Robertson and Rush Limbaugh are having a "Who's the biggest Dumbass?" contest this week.
 
2010-01-14 05:10:40 PM
Boxer Shorts?

Link (new window)

/wooo
 
2010-01-14 05:10:59 PM
sonofslacker: Serious question for serious times. What is the purpose behind this? Is this just a lunatic thing? Or is there a method to his madness? Like making money for some friends or to piss somebody off?

Hugo is nuttier than a squirrel turd. No further explanation is needed.
 
2010-01-14 05:13:44 PM
Billy Ligue: sperm, pickles, and codeine

upload.wikimedia.org

What's a nut, a sandwhich sliced-cut, and an opiate?
 
2010-01-14 05:13:51 PM
That's just BANANAS!

/Sly as a subway punk FTW!
 
2010-01-14 05:14:17 PM
FTA: "The list contains thousands of items. Whale sperm is used in hair products including shampoo."

Shampoo? I thought it would be for facials.

/Bukaki
 
2010-01-14 05:18:00 PM
sonofslacker: Serious question for serious times. What is the purpose behind this? Is this just a lunatic thing? Or is there a method to his madness? Like making money for some friends or to piss somebody off?

It looks like he is trying to persuade shippers to bring in more of certain items, and less of others. The article does a pretty poor job of explaining it, but by the look of it importers sell whatever they bring in and are paid in bolivars, then convert their bolivars into dollars (I am guessing that would be US dollars).

The variable exchange rate will give a better bolivar to dollar exchange rate for preferred import items.

What is not explained is why things like whale sperm, pickles, and codeine are preferred, while ketchup, cigarettes, and video games are not.

It could be that the non-preferred items are considered luxuries, or that they are produced domestically and the non-preferred rate is to protect the local producers' market. I can't quite tell on the second part. The CIA world factbook does mention major Venezualan imports and exports, but not with those specific details.

I couldn't be bothered to do any more research.
 
2010-01-14 05:23:06 PM
Am I think of this correclty.

If I am sending goods to Venezuela, I would think I would want my goods on the non preferred list. I would get closer to the 'real' exchange rate so I get more Bolivars for each Dollar of goods I send in.

If I am inside Venezuela, i naturally want to but at the preferred rate, as that will get me the most Dollar's worth of product at the least amount of Bolivars.

So I guess the question would be how to game the system so each side is getting their maximum return. Whoever figures that out, will be making some bank in Chavez's roulette of crazy.
 
2010-01-14 05:23:45 PM
"Welcome to the Wienerschnitzel, may I take your order please?"
"Yeah, I want two large cokes, 2 large fries, chili dog deluxe, dr. pepper, super deluxe with cheese and tomato."
"Do you want whale sperm with that?"
"NO!"

/anyway, that's how I heard the song.
 
2010-01-14 05:23:57 PM
"What's Spanish for 'straight jacket'?"
 
2010-01-14 05:26:12 PM
Aw, sorry Pyroy. I didn't see your comment.
 
2010-01-14 05:27:19 PM
What a Venezuelan whale fluffer may look like.

i50.tinypic.com
 
2010-01-14 05:28:19 PM
sonofslacker: Serious question for serious times. What is the purpose behind this? Is this just a lunatic thing? Or is there a method to his madness? Like making money for some friends or to piss somebody off?

It's the idea that some industries are too important to fail, and therefore have to be protected from the evil that is competition. We know it also as Mercantilism, one of the oldest political tricks in the book.

All it accomplishes in the end though, is the hollowing out of companies by destroying their ability/need to compete. In the end, more efficient competitors emerge in other locations where the politicos have no control.

The funniest thing about this is that many of these new competitors would've never been profitable had it not been for the increased cost imposed by the act of 'protection.'

This will soon be evident when watching the fates of GM, et al.
 
2010-01-14 05:31:38 PM
Spermaceti != sperm.
 
2010-01-14 05:32:29 PM
FTGodWin: It's the idea that some industries are too important to fail, and therefore have to be protected from the evil that is competition.

Sounds oddly familiar...
 
2010-01-14 05:42:05 PM
greaser_77: FTGodWin: It's the idea that some industries are too important to fail, and therefore have to be protected from the evil that is competition.

Sounds oddly familiar...


Here's my favorite version (new window) of it.

/we must protect the candle-makers!
 
2010-01-14 05:44:58 PM
www5.scholastic.co.uk

Approves.
 
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