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(Mainichi Daily News)   Parents sue after boy dies doing his best impression of Boba Fett getting swallowed by the Sarlacc Pit   (mdn.mainichi.co.jp) divider line 71
    More: Dumbass  
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128 clicks; posted to Main » on 08 Apr 2003 at 5:36 AM (11 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2003-04-08 01:19:46 AM
Boba Fett? Where??
 
2003-04-08 01:19:54 AM
That's strange... the article didn't mention if the boy's jet pack malfunctioned, sending him bouncing off of Jabba's sail barge, before falling into the maw of the Sarlacc. If not, it was a lousy impression.

Two points for spelling Sarlacc correctly.
 
2003-04-08 01:21:17 AM
actually i think he says boba fett twice.

sigh. thanks for reminding me of how much i love sw 123 and how much i hate sw 45. fark lucas's "prequel" numbering. the originals are the only true star wars.

god i hate him so much.
 
2003-04-08 01:22:43 AM
I was...uh..cutting it short. Yeah, that's the ticket. (And you're right, he does say it twice.)
 
2003-04-08 02:41:48 AM
A boy has died and all you can do is crack bad jokes?

Bad jokes without an Ackbar reference after someone was trapped? This sites going down hill I tell ya.
 
2003-04-08 02:43:30 AM
*insert "Star Wars" before each instance of "jokes" in my above post*
 
2003-04-08 04:25:34 AM
Ouch. To be honest I think the parents have a point. The kid shouldn't have been playing there, but they should have anticipated such things and set up safegaurds.

It's not like the money will bring their son back.

Yeah yeah, flame away.
 
2003-04-08 05:40:47 AM
We have the same problem with government vs beaches vs people getting killed at said beaches here in Australia

At the moment we have one gay claiming 4 million in damages because he dived into a sandbar in Sydney and became a quadraplegic, needless to say it was cut down
 
2003-04-08 05:43:03 AM
Shouldn't there have been some way to prevent kids from climbing down there?
Sarlacc wasn't just a pit ya know...
 
2003-04-08 05:46:10 AM
The poster of this article is a LIAR and a THIEF.
 
2003-04-08 05:47:13 AM
So what's the deal with posting articles with headlines that are almost more than 50% incorrect? Oh yeah, that's cool......
 
2003-04-08 05:49:45 AM
But what's the problem here? The Sarlaac takes 1000 years to digest it's victim. If this just took place, the kid is probably still alive.

Maybe he got distracted by Princess Leia in the gold bikini? :-)

PS - Imapler, IT'S A TRAP!!!
/ackbar
 
2003-04-08 05:50:15 AM
So they get millions, the town raises taxes to compensate, some struggling families have to give up health insurance to make ends meet, their kids get sick and hundreds of them die, but if we can save ONE child...
 
2003-04-08 06:01:47 AM
the prefectural government, which manages the drainage, neglected to install concrete blocks around the ventilation hole to prevent sand from falling in

Which wouldn't have been a problem if the kid hadn't been playing in the drainage system.
 
2003-04-08 06:03:37 AM
 
2003-04-08 06:05:25 AM
Nice to see the US isn't the only country with frivolous lawsuits.. *sigh*
 
2003-04-08 06:08:36 AM
I don't know how you can be a "dumbass" for being a 14 year old kid standing on a pile of sand (which happens to be on top of a drain pipe) and then falling in when the sand collapses.
 
2003-04-08 06:10:11 AM
I know its sad that the kid died but...
ROFL, what a great link title!
lol, my god!

/meh
 
2003-04-08 06:13:43 AM
What a way to go ...
 
2003-04-08 06:14:48 AM
You would think someone with the login Sherlock would read the article.
 
2003-04-08 06:16:13 AM
some struggling families have to give up health insurance to make ends meet

Sorry to be a pedant, but they have national health there.
But you were just kidding.

Yup.
Shutting up now am I.
 
2003-04-08 06:21:00 AM
When you're 14 years old....are you really "playing" at that age? He was "playing" in a drainage pipe? If this court is anything like the United States' courts, the parents will win the lawsuit, take their winnings to Vegas, and put it all on Black.
 
2003-04-08 06:35:48 AM
Bah- This is apart of growing up. Who didnt know a kid that got his eye fvcked up from doing something stupid?!
 
2003-04-08 06:38:40 AM
Sounds like a storyline from a Murakami book.
 
2003-04-08 06:53:00 AM
I never understood why the sarlacc digesting for "a thousand years" was a big deal. I mean, you fall in, lie there, without food or water you die after a week or so. After you're dead, why would you care how long it takes to be digested?
 
2003-04-08 07:03:12 AM
Sueing for 90odd million yen...whats that, like..20 dollars*?



*20 canadian dollars
 
2003-04-08 07:05:25 AM
Best.... headline.... ever.
 
2003-04-08 07:09:20 AM
these stories need their own icon. a mainichi icon or however you spell it. this just once more keeps me in texas.

and don't let the sarlacc become the new cliche. he was my favorite growing up. i would always call sarlacc when we played star wars. that way i could just lay there in the sandbox until the other kids finished playing and went home. don't ruin my childhood!
 
2003-04-08 07:15:33 AM
Culling. the. herd.
 
2003-04-08 07:18:06 AM
Technically speaking, he died in the Pit of Tarkoon. There was no Sarlacc there.
 
2003-04-08 07:27:07 AM
92 million yen = $750k.

For a lost child.

These people need some American lawyers.
 
2003-04-08 07:59:22 AM
Great headline. I'm not pining. When I climbed in sewer drains as a child, deathtraps were things we looked out for, consciously. Thats what made it fun.

Heh. Great starwars ref too. Man I laughed when I read that one.
 
2003-04-08 08:13:31 AM
Mike from accounting - He only Lied about being a thief
 
2003-04-08 08:21:25 AM
two words: Darwin Award
 
2003-04-08 08:29:14 AM
oceans 11?
 
2003-04-08 09:13:02 AM
"Suzuki, who was a third-year student at a municipal junior high school, died in the accident at the age of 14."

Maybe I'm missing something but in Maryland junior high school consists of 7th and 8th Grade. Does this mean he had to repeat one of those grades? If it does then this explains a lot about the article.

/ Unbased Darwin Comment
 
2003-04-08 09:18:14 AM
Hmm, apparently these parents want us all to live in a happy place covered with foam padding and warning signs everywhere. I'm sorry, the kid died doing something stupid. Sad but hell it happens daily. If these parents were so concerned they have to take it to court why werent these fools holding this kids hand every minute of his life?

The parents need to join the kid...
 
2003-04-08 09:19:51 AM
Actually, this lawsuit isn't as ludicrous as it seems - the local governments are actually charged with keeping these sorta things safe.

Seriously - if there's a hole in the sidewalk, they'll have a guy out there to tell people not to step into the hole until its been fixed. If the Grand Canyon was run by a Japanese municipal government, it would have a guardrail 20 feet from the edge.

The downside to all this protection of the citizenry is that people never seem to develop any common sense, and do silly things like go crawling around in storm drains.

"The government didn't put up a barrier, so it must be safe..."
 
2003-04-08 09:40:27 AM
Walk without rythme and it wont attract the worm, no wait, wrong movie.
 
2003-04-08 09:42:36 AM
Just checking, and yep, exactly as I suspected.
A 14 year old is buried alive and subsequently, farkers jest and make geeky Star Wars references in tribute.
Real nice. Check please!
 
2003-04-08 09:52:27 AM
OK,
1) Very sad. This does seem like standard teenage curiosity with standard teenage discounting of risk. If the town didn't have it even symbolically fenced off and warnings posted, then they need to cough up some dough. $750K doesn't seem too unreasonable, though I think the US Army uses $200K for the value of a life.

2) That Sarlacc reminds me of Ann Coulter's cooter.

3) Polaroid Afternoon: I was looking through the Field guide to the Fauna of the Star Wars Universe at Borders the other day, and found that they classified the Sarlacc as an insect, like an ant lion. The distance across the pit was about 20% of the body length, with the body vertical below the pit. Personally, I think someone didn't think out their taxonomy too well, but this is the man who gave us Jar Jar Binx, so I don't really expect it of him.
 
2003-04-08 09:53:09 AM
Stymie
Laugh or cry. I know which I prefer.
 
2003-04-08 10:06:31 AM
I remember being around that age at some beach in the water and body surfing the biggest wave I've ever seen, only to be shortly sucked into the undertow. I remember spinning around and arond, looping & flipping underneath, endlessly spinniung as the power of the wave just tossed me around under the water like I was a rag-doll. I even remember wondering if i was ever going to be able to get out of this alive... when I finally surfaced, I yelled: "Best Wave Ever!!"

/Childhood is an exercise in stupidity. Some get lucky, some don't.
 
2003-04-08 10:07:57 AM
too bad the gov't didn't put a latex barrier around the father's...
well, you know what i'm saying.
/darwin
 
2003-04-08 10:08:55 AM
...not that i don't feel bad for the kid. just doing kid stuff, and all that.
 
2003-04-08 10:30:30 AM
so his ass got offed by a half blind Han Solo?..
 
2003-04-08 10:41:02 AM
Being digested over the course of a thousand years or whatever isn't much of a threat as you'll die of a lack of food in a month, if not a lack of water in a few days, if not a asphyxiation in a couple minutes.
 
2003-04-08 10:51:21 AM
*BURP*
 
2003-04-08 10:51:52 AM
Was there a wilhelm scream when he fell in?

/didn't read the article
 
2003-04-08 11:38:27 AM
A couple of points.

For those who complain that the boy was merely minding his own business and fell through a hole and died, I advised to actually read the article. What he did was walk into a drainage pipe. Approxiamately 50 meters into the pipe, he came upon a ventilation hole, and decided to climb UP into the ventilation shaft and out of the drainage system. At which point the boy caused the sand on top of the shaft to pour in, knocking him down and burying him. So, he pretty much caused his own demise. If you ask me, there should have been bars covering the entrance of the drainage pipe so he couldn't have gotten in, but honestly, over 90% of the responsibility for this accident rest squarely in the hands of the boy.

Second, for those commenting about the Sarlacc's slow digestive system and the fact that you will die without food or water relatively quickly; you're missing the point. The truth is, due to the slow digestive system, Boba Fett's armor was able to protect him and enable him to escape. (Honestly people, don't you fanatically read the Star Wars books). Boba was then able to return and torment the Sarlacc with the drive wash from his ship. It's all in Tales from Jabba's Palace. Not to veer off topic, but does anyone wonder if Admiral Akbar was a Muslim? J/K

/Boba Fett's biggest fan and Jar Jar Bink's biggest enemy
 
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