I'm coming into this with an open kimono - funny, I use that phrase in sex chat rooms all the time

I'm a little on my knees here, so help me out. We don't want to raise the flagpole with our mouths open in the rain, you get what I'm saying. Let's stroke the puppy for a little bit and raise some fur, maybe smack the backside and see what's inside the door. Get the others on the table and let's get some hard banging on this. Stir the milk. Let's not swallow everything, though. We've gotta be selective. When we're close, we'll know. We'll pop 'em off one at a time. Something big will come from this, I can feel it. I'm gonna bend backwards to make this happen. Don't let me down.

I put on my kimono and wizard hat.

The first time someone offers me a "bite of the reality sandwich," I'm going to be forced to offer them a bite of something else entirely.

Fark-approved "Open Kimono" (new window)

Thanks, Drew!

I'm somehow disturbed that a "reality sandwich" is egg salad on rye.

coyote1284: "Let's run that idea up the flagpole and see if it flies"

I'm gonna "throw this against the wall and see if it sticks" but I believe they combined "...flagpole and see who salutes" and "throw this out there and see if it flies" there.


I tried to get "Let's stick a knife in it and see if it screams" going, but no luck so far.

AbbeySomeone: AbbeySomeone: BKITU: I'm somehow disturbed that a "reality sandwich" is egg salad on rye.

I thought it was pimento loaf on whole wheat.

It is rye - oops.

And that's the egg saladiest pimiento loaf I've ever seen.


J_Marshall: I have a manager that is always using the phrase 'pump my brakes.' As in, "When I hear that the data isn't confirmed, that's when I start to pump my breaks on the direction we're headed."

/need to come up with a good response.

"Bleed your frakkin' brake lines already, you're gonna get us all killed!"

What an open kimono might look like, PNSFW.

My current aspiration is to strategically leverage a position in a turn-key and future-proof global marketplace, thereby utilizing the synergistic funtionalities inherent to a skills ecosystem that orchestrates and proceduralizes mission-critical marketecture. By incentivizing team players during deep dive endeavors and pathfinder projects, I frequently invoke a tactical paradigm shift that focuses on promulgating leading-edge methodologies. Although rallying the troops is often outsourced, a strong disintermediator can empower such a matrixed skill set, and can ramp-up the human capital, allowing the team to catch the moving train as it traverses the value stream. By garnering low-hanging fruit, I will ultimately break through the glass ceiling, and capitalize on recontextualization of robust enterprise key reinforcement areas such as recognizing the criticality of monetizing scalable fiscal metrics. Also, by mitigating show-stoppers, and focusing on the long pole in the tent, I will keep from getting behind the 8 ball. Finally, I plan to hypertask, rack and stack responsibilities, and propagate enablers who can drill down into core competencies and bird dog soft money opportunities; all while simultaneously weaving myself a golden parachute and avoiding being surplussed.

One recent corporate doublespeak phenomenon that absolutely drives me f*cking crazy is people saying "around" when they really mean "about."

As in "we've had several discussions around this."

Every honcho in my company started using "around" instead of "about" virtually overnight for some unknown reason.

Obligatory.

sigdiamond2000
One recent corporate doublespeak phenomenon that absolutely drives me f*cking crazy is people saying "around" when they really mean "about."

You think that's bad. Some idiot here started eating a snickers bar with a knife and fork and now everyone's doing it!

/They just don't get the hydraulics of the situation.