SJKebab: Anyone else twitch at the headline?

I think my imagination has just suffered irreparable damage...

Oblig (new window)

Ahlfeldt said alcohol was a factor in the incident, and it's possible Gable believed he was entering his own apartment. It didn't appear he was trying to steal anything, he said.

Well, duh. He had to empty those cans first.



Beer. Is there anything it can't do?

At eighty six, my Grandpa Ted started seeing the tires on his car revolve while it was parked in the driveway. He also started sleepwalking, which forced us to make him wear pajamas, which he called Baby Mittens. And during the day, he would wander out of the yard, looking up, maybe following a cloud or a bird. I cried every time he got lost, and I knew we had to do something.

So, I remembered an old farm trick. I bought a truck tire, fifteen yards of chain, and a padlock. I filled the inside of the tire with quick dry cement, and secured it around Grandpa Ted's waist. He could still move around, but he'd get all red faced and sweaty, dragging that tire behind him.

On Sunday morning, I took him down to the Gay Street bridge. After I gave him a big hug, I threw the tire over the railing. The slack coming out of the chain sounded like a motorboat. Grandpa Ted smiled, then WOOSH! he was pulled over the railing. SPLASH! SPLASH! The ripples dissipated quickly, and Grandpa Ted went home.

My hovercraft is full of eels

FTFA - A Fargo apartment dweller who set beer cans in front of his door to alert him to intruders ended up tussling with an alleged burglar early Tuesday, police said.

I get all stabby when I hear or read this word. I always imagine a tickle fight or apprehensive slaps to the face. This word should never be used to describe an actual fight where blood is drawn and damage is done. Ghey word has the ghey.

/stab stab stab

"He called it his burglar alarm. He said that he doesn't really lock his doors, so he just does that instead,"

NTidd: "He called it his burglar alarm. He said that he doesn't really lock his doors, so he just does that instead,"

Isnt fargo kinda like Canada? No real crime? Everyone leaves their doors unlocked there.

Beauxnick: NTidd: "He called it his burglar alarm. He said that he doesn't really lock his doors, so he just does that instead,"

Isnt fargo kinda like Canada? No real crime? Everyone leaves their doors unlocked there.

These guys beg to differ.

Beauxnick: NTidd: "He called it his burglar alarm. He said that he doesn't really lock his doors, so he just does that instead,"

Isnt fargo kinda like Canada? No real crime? Everyone leaves their doors unlocked there.

No "real" crime, but there's enough property crime to make it worthwhile. Also, a high-as-a-kite 17 year-old kid wandered into an unlocked apartment in Moorhead (right across the river) and got himself shot last summer. So, it's been a big topic lately.

Two things about this story: Wouldn't locking the door be easier than setting up beer cans? When did 61 become "elderly"? My dad's 61, and I sure as hell wouldn't mess with him.

Beer can alarm tips off police of nude geriatric fight

At least it wasn't a lemon celebration.

Ok, time to out the subby. This headline is Gorgor bait of the most blatant kind.

SJKebab: Anyone else twitch at the headline?

I'm sure that deep down in his lair, Gorgor did.

Hopefully gorgor is sleeping in today.

Cripple fight?

You canBad bit in the bit bucket: Beer can alarm tips off police of nude geriatric fight

At least it wasn't a lemon celebration.

You can't have a lemon party without old Dick.

/some sorta reference

Optimal advertisement placement...

That reminds me of when I was young and poor , lived in a bad neighborhood and coudn't afford an alarm (yet I could afford cheep beer).I would occasionally set up a beer can pyrimid in front of the door .Never got the chance to fight anybody naked though.

of?

I tried the beer can alarm one night but my wife kept knocking the cans over trying to escape.

/cheap beer makes your breath smell bad, I guess

Approves of these tactics.

Bukowski. Thanks, I'd never seen that photo.

I don't know what your old age is going to be like, fellow Farkers and Farkerettes, but I am making notes on how to make a beer can pyramid.

When I have to fight intruders in my underwear, I'll be sure to post pics.