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(First Coast News) Spiffy Here's to you, Mr. Beer Opener Dog Collar Inventor Guy   (firstcoastnews.com) divider line 60
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2009-12-29 08:46:33 PM
This will be great for all those times I want to enjoy a beer with dog hair in it. What's next, putting a bottle opener on the bottom of footwear?
 
2009-12-29 11:53:44 PM
This article single-handedly restored my faith in America.

Also

Bag-o-Nugs: This will be great for all those times I want to enjoy a beer with dog hair in it. What's next, putting a bottle opener on the bottom of footwear?

Most people groom their pets so this wont be an issue.

Also there is nothing that says you can't own a shaved dog.

One more thing. Isn't the whole point behind this the idea that you can whistle and a beer opener shows up?
 
M-G
2009-12-30 04:20:46 AM
They invented it again?
 
2009-12-30 04:21:17 AM
Whistle and the bottle opener comes running over.

Whistle and the food comes running over.

Wasn't the dog the first form of meals on wheels in some countries?
 
2009-12-30 04:22:43 AM
Um ok...Take a beer opener...Rivet it to a dog collar. Tada!
 
2009-12-30 04:23:16 AM
FTFA: "We had just a whole bucket of beers, Coronas. I remember a couple dogs and no openers and we said, 'I think that's a good idea. We should try that," said Hornbeak, co-founder of bark4beer.

Brilliant! Wait, what?
 
2009-12-30 04:23:49 AM
Bag-o-Nugs: This will be great for all those times I want to enjoy a beer with dog hair in it. What's next, putting a bottle opener on the bottom of footwear?

Oh yeah, too late.


208.106.181.133
 
2009-12-30 04:24:22 AM
So why stop there? Lighter? TV remote? Car keys? How bout a St Bongnard? The possibilities are endless!
 
2009-12-30 04:24:46 AM
This one is by far my favorite bottle opener though.

208.106.181.133
 
2009-12-30 04:27:34 AM
This idea is great. You never lose the dog!
 
2009-12-30 04:31:12 AM
And it goes withour saying it only works for big dogs.
 
2009-12-30 04:48:28 AM
www.ahrensbicycles.com
 
2009-12-30 04:48:53 AM
Dude, just hang a churchkey on your dog's collar. This isn't anything new.
 
2009-12-30 04:51:26 AM
is it really so difficult for some people to open a bottle of beer?

if i don't have a dedicated opener in sight i can improvise and turn just about anything into a bottle opener.
 
2009-12-30 04:52:25 AM
DerekSD: is it really so difficult for some people to open a bottle of beer?

if i don't have a dedicated opener in sight i can improvise and turn just about anything into a bottle opener.


Yup, if you are really good you can use one bottle of beer to open another bottle of beer.
 
2009-12-30 04:53:35 AM
These guys are obviously not Mexican. Mexicans can open beer with ANYTHING that is handy. It is quite impressive....

/Some things I have seen being used to open beers: spoons, knives, another beer, teeth, lighter, candle holder, trumpet.....
 
2009-12-30 04:55:39 AM
It's as if the past 3 greenlights of this very invention haven't come to fruition!!!
 
2009-12-30 04:56:11 AM
http://www.bark4beer.com/ (new window)

The actual site that's selling the things... turns out it's on a retracting line, keeping dog hair and the precious, precious beer apart from each other. And also lets you use the thing standing up... which is nice.
 
2009-12-30 05:02:40 AM
i46.photobucket.com

Buddy Christ holds my bottle opener. As you can see he is very happy about it.
 
2009-12-30 05:08:20 AM
Dogs already have a bottle opener. Just turn 'em around.
 
2009-12-30 05:12:14 AM
Necessity is the mother of invention........and beer is it's dead-beat dad.
 
2009-12-30 05:12:57 AM
I kind of assume that people who drink a lot of beer already have worked out some sort of beer opening solution.

My friend just keeps her bottle opener on her key chain. Sometimes I worry about that girl...
 
2009-12-30 05:15:29 AM
Bag-o-Nugs: This will be great for all those times I want to enjoy a beer with dog hair in it.i>

RTFA:

It took a year and a half and six versions to get it right. The initial prototype had the beer opener attached to the collar, which didn't work because, according to the inventors, hair got into your beer or beer got on the dog....So they went to a rectractable version, which solved both problems. They now have a patent, a website, and more and more orders coming in every day.

I'm not even a Total Farker, but I should be. Some of you guys are idiots.
 
2009-12-30 05:24:38 AM
fasahd: So why stop there? Lighter? TV remote? Car keys? How bout a St Bongnard? The possibilities are endless!

Well, I have no idea what a St. Bongnard is, but I've used all of those others to open beers. As a few other people have said, you can use any object with the right leverage. I've folded up a piece of paper and opened a beer with it. I'm working on getting down a bottlecap, but it just doesn't seem to work very well. I can do it, but it's not worth the effort.
 
2009-12-30 05:28:22 AM
If you break a beer bottle, it becomes a dog-opener.
 
2009-12-30 05:38:43 AM
with a name like "hornbeak" I have to ask the obvious question:

Is his crank proportionate to his nose?
 
2009-12-30 05:43:06 AM
sweater_pups: with a name like "hornbeak" I have to ask the obvious question:

Is his crank proportionate to his nose?


Your name, on the other hand, begs the question...BIE?
 
2009-12-30 05:48:11 AM
best part is the taste of dog slobber, random yard shiat, and other things will only improve the flavor
 
2009-12-30 05:48:26 AM
i49.tinypic.com
 
2009-12-30 05:49:13 AM
fasahd: So why stop there? Lighter? TV remote? Car keys? How bout a St Bongnard? The possibilities are endless!
www.recordstore.co.uk
www.uxsight.com
www.freshpromotions.com.au

I'm guessing "dog collar" was the only marketable item left that didn't have a bottle opener attached to it.

/sadly, a GIS for "St Bongnard" turned up disappointingly few results.
 
Rib
2009-12-30 05:51:44 AM
i227.photobucket.com
 
2009-12-30 06:11:36 AM
 
2009-12-30 06:21:06 AM
plywoodjungle: If you break a beer bottle, it becomes a dog-opener.

I don't know how I didn't see this coming.... But, in any case, you owe me a new something. Maybe a bottle opener, one that's attached to a dog collar. For the dog I don't own.

/sorry, sleep deprived.
 
2009-12-30 06:22:54 AM
scottyvr6: Bag-o-Nugs: This will be great for all those times I want to enjoy a beer with dog hair in it.i>

RTFA:

It took a year and a half and six versions to get it right. The initial prototype had the beer opener attached to the collar, which didn't work because, according to the inventors, hair got into your beer or beer got on the dog....So they went to a rectractable version, which solved both problems. They now have a patent, a website, and more and more orders coming in every day.

I'm not even a Total Farker, but I should be. Some of you guys are idiots.


So...you want to become an idiot? (and if that is the case, aren't you already there?)
 
2009-12-30 06:24:42 AM
Poopington: sweater_pups: with a name like "hornbeak" I have to ask the obvious question:

Is his crank proportionate to his nose?

Your name, on the other hand, begs the question...BIE?


Indeed! The tiny profile pics indicate cuteness, but more evidence is needed.
 
2009-12-30 06:36:50 AM
Pfft, amateurs. All I have to do is whistle and my wife brings me another beer, already opened and in a hugger! And there's hardly ever any hair in it. :-)
 
2009-12-30 06:37:46 AM
If you have a lighter (new window), you have an opener.
 
2009-12-30 06:41:12 AM
Solty Dog: Buddy Christ holds my bottle opener. As you can see he is very happy about it.

Good heavens. A beer opener on Jesus, a passel o' squirrels AND a saltire??
I think I love you.
 
2009-12-30 07:07:47 AM
raab:

Cute. Very cute.
 
2009-12-30 07:20:25 AM
Tailgate tested!!! Tailgate appr...slpt splt splt!!!

/Hair of the dog
 
2009-12-30 07:23:23 AM
img189.imageshack.us

GOOD DOG!
 
2009-12-30 07:25:50 AM
Inventor overlooked the fact the your dog doesn't need a beer opener. Dogs are already equipped to produce american mainstream beer on-tap: Just add water.
 
2009-12-30 07:41:43 AM
Submitted First With a Better Headline: I kind of assume that people who drink a lot of beer already have worked out some sort of beer opening solution.

My friend just keeps her bottle opener on her key chain. Sometimes I worry about that girl...




I didn't know we knew each other...
/have one on my key chain
//can use a lighter
///and my teeth
 
2009-12-30 07:43:12 AM
Submitted First With a Better Headline: I kind of assume that people who drink a lot of beer already have worked out some sort of beer opening solution.

My friend just keeps her bottle opener on her key chain. Sometimes I worry about that girl...


i5.photobucket.com

...why? oh, cause just having the one that could break would result in a serious situation. Yeah, makes sense.
 
2009-12-30 07:48:25 AM
Prior Art:

lh6.ggpht.com
 
2009-12-30 07:53:39 AM
mtadder: And it goes withour saying it only works for big dogs.

Men generally drink more beer than girls and no man would have a little dog.
 
2009-12-30 07:58:34 AM
www.thebeerbelt.com

I'll see your beer dog collar and raise you. No not that kind of raise, the other kind.

/Put your pants on, you're scaring the hogs.
 
2009-12-30 08:27:38 AM
M-G: They invented it again?

And again and again.
 
2009-12-30 08:40:32 AM
YoungSwedishBlonde: It's as if the past 3 greenlights of this very invention haven't come to fruition!!!

Won't somebody please think of the greenlights? Mods?
 
2009-12-30 08:46:28 AM
Fark.com presents... Real Men of Genius.
Real Men of Genius.

Today we salute you, Mr. Beer Opener Dog Collar Inventor Guy
Mr. Beer Opener Dog Collar Inventor Guy!

Normally we would have to get up and find a bottle opener.
Where the hell did I put it?

But thanks to you, man's best friend has become man's best bro.
Ooooh who's a good boy!

So crack open another beer and browse today's headlines, with your canine companion at your side, 'cause he deserves it.
Man I hate Caturday!

And thank you, most of all, Mr. Beer Opener Dog Collar Inventor Guy.
Mr. Beer Opener Dog Collar Inventor Guy...!
 
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