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(Sun Sentinel)   "The victim stated that the suspect has told her he is going to put witchcraft on her, beat her up and blow up her home"   (sun-sentinel.com) divider line 38
    More: Florida, Fort Pierce, witchcraft, Fort Lauderdale, outbacks, victims, Christmas Day  
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3528 clicks; posted to Main » on 29 Dec 2009 at 11:18 PM (5 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



38 Comments   (+0 »)
   

Archived thread
 
2009-12-29 09:00:49 PM  
In that order?
 
2009-12-29 11:22:31 PM  
That's why she should have bought a voodoo doll long ago. One threat and whammo! Long needles through the doll.
 
2009-12-29 11:22:37 PM  
If you read the article, you'll see that she lives in a Jumpity Jump Castle. He was doing her a huge favor. Jerks.
 
2009-12-29 11:24:01 PM  
Without reading the article I picture my ex wife and her family.
Upiddy rednecks
 
2009-12-29 11:24:35 PM  
Was he going to huff and puff? Would she not let him in by the hair of her chinny chin chin?
 
2009-12-29 11:26:32 PM  
TFA - The victim called police Christmas Day and said the 42-year-old man had been calling since 5 a.m. the day before, estimating she'd received 110 calls on her cell phone.

"The victim claims the suspect to be harassing her because she refuses to date him," the report states. "The victim stated that the suspect has told her he is going to put witchcraft on her, beat her up and blow up her home."


That's true love right there.
 
2009-12-29 11:32:37 PM  
whatever happened to just buying a girl some flowers?
 
2009-12-29 11:33:43 PM  
Did he kill her father, rape and murder her sister, burn her ranch, shoot her dog, and steal her bible?
 
2009-12-29 11:36:35 PM  
Assimilate This: Did he kill her father, rape and murder her sister, burn her ranch, shoot her dog, and steal her bible?

You left out slashing the tires on the pickup truck.
 
2009-12-29 11:37:39 PM  
tallguywithglasseson: In that order?

Callous: TFA - The victim called police Christmas Day and said the 42-year-old man had been calling since 5 a.m. the day before, estimating she'd received 110 calls on her cell phone.

"The victim claims the suspect to be harassing her because she refuses to date him," the report states. "The victim stated that the suspect has told her he is going to put witchcraft on her, beat her up and blow up her home."

That's true love right there.


In that order.
 
2009-12-29 11:37:41 PM  
Didn't we already have a Charlie Sheen thread today?
 
2009-12-29 11:40:40 PM  
does the suspect weigh the same as a duck?
 
2009-12-29 11:44:54 PM  
I ain't gonna take none o' your foolin' around.
I ain't gonna take none o' your puttin' me down.
 
2009-12-29 11:50:14 PM  
Well look on the bright side, at least it wasnt anything crazy.
 
2009-12-29 11:50:22 PM  
I am here for the chicks
 
2009-12-29 11:50:33 PM  
"The victim stated that the suspect has told her he is going to put witchcraft on her"

Is this the same guy Bush talked about putting food on his family?
 
2009-12-29 11:51:24 PM  
I love Florida so much, there's just much crazy and fail crammed into it.
 
2009-12-29 11:57:43 PM  
I'm from Florida, and I don't get it...what's today, Florida crazies come out day?
 
2009-12-29 11:59:57 PM  
Gyrfalcon: tallguywithglasseson: In that order?

Callous: TFA - The victim called police Christmas Day and said the 42-year-old man had been calling since 5 a.m. the day before, estimating she'd received 110 calls on her cell phone.

"The victim claims the suspect to be harassing her because she refuses to date him," the report states. "The victim stated that the suspect has told her he is going to put witchcraft on her, beat her up and blow up her home."

That's true love right there.

In that order.


What I find funny is that if he's got the mojo, why does HE need to beat her up 'n' kill 'er?

Dang pikers can't even summon flatulence, let alone Cthulu.
 
2009-12-30 12:02:15 AM  
I went to party once and some dude from a band asked for any requests and I asked for sublime and he said "I dont practice santeria"

/cool story
 
2009-12-30 12:02:53 AM  
He's doing it wrong.
 
2009-12-30 12:04:06 AM  
Must be Haitians. Gotta love them and their island dating rituals.
 
2009-12-30 12:04:34 AM  
uncletogie: Gyrfalcon: tallguywithglasseson: In that order?

Callous: TFA - The victim called police Christmas Day and said the 42-year-old man had been calling since 5 a.m. the day before, estimating she'd received 110 calls on her cell phone.

"The victim claims the suspect to be harassing her because she refuses to date him," the report states. "The victim stated that the suspect has told her he is going to put witchcraft on her, beat her up and blow up her home."

That's true love right there.

In that order.

What I find funny is that if he's got the mojo, why does HE need to beat her up 'n' kill 'er?

Dang pikers can't even summon flatulence, let alone Cthulu.


Just in case?
 
2009-12-30 12:06:58 AM  
If only she had been some sort of state-level political figure or something, you know, the kind of person who gets anti-witchcraft blessings invoked on her behalf....
 
2009-12-30 12:07:54 AM  
Any robe or wizard hat?
 
2009-12-30 12:08:40 AM  
"Curses!"
 
2009-12-30 12:16:05 AM  
I was a little confused about the story. Luckily, Google has loads of information on what a bewitching lady might look like:
images.amazon.com
images.buycostumes.com
www.allfancydress.com
ecx.images-amazon.com
www.hollywoodtoysandcostumes.com
 
2009-12-30 12:29:57 AM  
Are Ruby and Sam a "thing" again?
www.buddytv.com
 
2009-12-30 12:48:26 AM  
Here's a nifty game to play at home: Put masking tape down the left side of your monitor, open the Fark main page. Read the headlines and try to guess which ones have the Florida tag.

On second thought...never mind...it's far too easy.

Another glorious moment for America's wang.
 
2009-12-30 12:53:04 AM  
So is he saying that his beating her up witchcraft is gonna blow her house up?
All of it being done in one insane action?

Now thats what I'd call some crazy multi-tasking juju.
 
2009-12-30 02:56:23 AM  
Ahh... Florida tag.
 
2009-12-30 03:18:54 AM  
That's why witchcraft should have a 10 day waiting period. Tempers flare and in a fit of emotion someone is turned into a newt, where a calm head after a cooling down period would have otherwise prevailed.
 
2009-12-30 03:32:01 AM  
Farker Soze: That's why witchcraft should have a 10 day waiting period. Tempers flare and in a fit of emotion someone is turned into a newt, where a calm head after a cooling down period would have otherwise prevailed.

Oh, come on. Listen to yourself.

This woman is in danger from a man who possesses witchcraft. Her only option is to obtain witchcraft of her own for her own defense. But people like you would have her stuck on some X-day waiting list while she spends every minute in peril.

Um, right to bear charms? Hello? Sound familiar?
 
2009-12-30 04:12:31 AM  
Submitted First With a Better Headline: Farker Soze: That's why witchcraft should have a 10 day waiting period. Tempers flare and in a fit of emotion someone is turned into a newt, where a calm head after a cooling down period would have otherwise prevailed.

Oh, come on. Listen to yourself.

This woman is in danger from a man who possesses witchcraft. Her only option is to obtain witchcraft of her own for her own defense. But people like you would have her stuck on some X-day waiting list while she spends every minute in peril.

Um, right to bear charms? Hello? Sound familiar?


Oh great, another spell nut. The right to bear charms was intended by the Founding High Priests to only apply to Covens, not to individuals. Besides, studies have shown that a summoning rod with speed dial to your local Warlock's tower is more effective at saving lives than a self-wielded hex. Keep wizardry where it belongs: away from the neonate and in the hands of trained professionals.
 
2009-12-30 10:51:45 AM  
So mote it be.
 
2009-12-30 10:58:44 AM  
Headline reads just like my ex-husband's latest divorce, so I'm getting a kick.

/I told him not to leave chicken bones on the dresser.
//SRSLY
 
2009-12-30 12:11:08 PM  
/I told him not to leave chicken bones on the dresser.

its not his fault if he passed out while eating the chicken.. we've all been there
 
2009-12-30 03:43:17 PM  
Submitted First With a Better Headline: Farker Soze: That's why witchcraft should have a 10 day waiting period. Tempers flare and in a fit of emotion someone is turned into a newt, where a calm head after a cooling down period would have otherwise prevailed.

Oh, come on. Listen to yourself.

This woman is in danger from a man who possesses witchcraft. Her only option is to obtain witchcraft of her own for her own defense. But people like you would have her stuck on some X-day waiting list while she spends every minute in peril.

Um, right to bear charms? Hello? Sound familiar?


I think I love you :)

/// I LOLd at that...
///and my kids are looking at me funny :)
 
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