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(The New York Times)   Flying to suck even harder - new restrictions after Nigerian bomber include not leaving one's seat for the last hour of flight   (nytimes.com) divider line 599
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16416 clicks; posted to Main » on 26 Dec 2009 at 7:23 PM (4 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2009-12-26 02:01:39 PM
Meh - just hand out diapers at the gate and strap everyone down with a padlocked seatbelt
 
2009-12-26 02:37:33 PM
Let's just start putting everyone in hibernation chambers when we check in.
 
2009-12-26 02:42:40 PM
Flying sucks enough as it is. My tinfoil hat theory says this whole thing was hatched by the airlines to decrease the number of people flying with them and hence, the number of complaints.

That, and they need some more ways around the upcoming "passenger rights" legislation too.
 
2009-12-26 02:49:59 PM
CougarJeff: Let's just start putting everyone in hibernation chambers when we check in.

I wouldn't mind that. At least flying would be less annoying. The last flight I went on was 20% babies, 20% bratty little kids, and 30% morbidly obese people taking up two seats even though they only paid for one.
 
2009-12-26 03:12:44 PM
If you got to pee, don't want until the last minute to head to the loo. Either plan ahead or just whip it out and pee on the seat in front of you.
 
2009-12-26 04:20:46 PM
Actually, what it means is that anyone who jumps up to stop a plane-burning douchebag in the last hour of flight is in violation of federal law.
 
2009-12-26 04:44:21 PM
Bucky Katt: If you got to pee, don't want until the last minute to head to the loo. Either plan ahead or just whip it out and pee on the seat in front of you.

Use those little bags they give you.
 
2009-12-26 05:30:35 PM
Goddamnit. Every time airline security restrictions start getting reasonable, some dumbass lights himself on fire and we're back to square one.
 
2009-12-26 05:32:38 PM
This country is full of and run by utter cowards. Just pathetic.
 
2009-12-26 05:32:58 PM
-this is just the beginning. Obamacare will use these rules are a prelude to destroy any chance you might have for life saving surgery

-at least during Mr. Bush's years we were FREE to walk around or go to the washroom in the last hour of the flight.

-the bobmer is really a close relative of Obama and was paid by him to attack America.

-its because Obama is a secret muslin and wants to destroy america that the calls from this bomber-wannabe were ignored...


//does that cover all angles? or i missed something
 
2009-12-26 05:33:46 PM
Yeah.

THAT will keep us safer.
 
2009-12-26 05:37:35 PM
my favorite was when they banned all liquids. so, in essence, they were banning a state of matter. what's next? ban all solids? gases? bose-einstein condensates?
 
2009-12-26 05:48:42 PM
FlashHarry: my favorite was when they banned all liquids. so, in essence, they were banning a state of matter. what's next? ban all solids? gases? bose-einstein condensates?

The "ban on all electronic devices" (not sure if true yet) will be the end of airline travel for anyone not traveling outside of their country of origin (assuming driving or alternate transport is available).

When people can't use their cell phone, blackberry, laptop (with airline provided wireless connectivity) or their kindle, airlines are done. It's one thing to start charging checked bag fees, it's quite another to tell passengers that you get to piss into one of the beverage cups provided 2 hours prior and that you aren't allowed to read anything not in paper form. FFS, are they trying to increase the weight of luggage or carry-on baggage? Some of us read on long flights, are they really going to restrict electronic readers?

It's a good thing a minority of us actually read books anymore.
 
2009-12-26 05:50:34 PM
Score another victory for the terrorists.
 
2009-12-26 05:51:21 PM
Kyosuke: Score another victory for the terrorists.

What's pathetic is that some people think you're being sarcastic. You're really, really not. That's exactly what this is.
 
2009-12-26 05:58:41 PM
7of7: The last flight I went on was 20% babies, 20% bratty little kids, and 30% morbidly obese people taking up two seats even though they only paid for one.

So, mostly Americans?

/sorry, it's a disease
 
zz9
2009-12-26 05:59:38 PM
I am struggling to think of any single measure that is as easy to get around as this. So a terrorist can't set off his bomb in the last hour? So he sets it off a few minutes earlier. Job done.

This is like saying "He was wearing a blue jacket! Lets ban all blue jackets!"
 
2009-12-26 06:06:37 PM
snuff3r: So, mostly Americans?

Exactly.
 
2009-12-26 06:11:28 PM
FlashHarry: my favorite was when they banned all liquids. so, in essence, they were banning a state of matter. what's next? ban all solids? gases? bose-einstein condensates?

I fully support the banning of Bose-Einstein condensates.
 
2009-12-26 06:12:17 PM
The passengers seem to be better at protecting the plane than the TSA. Just have the stewardesses give people permission to beat the hell out of terrorists during their pre-flight "Here's how to use the seat belt" briefing.
 
2009-12-26 06:14:31 PM
People move too goddamm much on airplanes as it is.
 
2009-12-26 06:19:03 PM
Well I guess that means if someone is sitting down attempting to light a bomb, no one can get up and restrain them. Makes sense.
 
2009-12-26 06:30:09 PM
So at the end of the flight when the child has been doing their best to sit still and be quiet for hours is the perfect time to take away distractions. No snacks, no toys, no books, no movies or iPods. And nothing for the adults who would like to ignore any little ones.

Just great.
 
2009-12-26 06:42:00 PM
We need to hire even more flunkies to harass screen passengers or maybe just start strapping people down to their seats for the duration of the flight. That'll work. Why always such low-tech measures? Shouldn't the US have the most sophisticated and high-tech security solutions in the world? Like Total recall-style body scanners and security agents who can read and shiat. We can afford that. We're still a rich country, right?
 
2009-12-26 06:56:32 PM
Why doesn't the TSA just gang and bound us and insert butt plugs up our rectums? That would make air travel safe.
 
2009-12-26 07:02:46 PM
Awesome, I get to take a 23-month old on a cross-country flight in two weeks.
 
2009-12-26 07:03:07 PM
ragekage: Awesome, I get to take a 23-month old on a cross-country flight in two weeks.

I have a cross-country flight in 14 hours.
 
2009-12-26 07:05:50 PM
I'd love to take the train, but I just priced out the cost of going from LA to OH on Amtrak (getting a family bedroom - 3 days is a bit much in only a chair)

~$2000 - one way!!
 
2009-12-26 07:09:19 PM
DamnYankees: ragekage: Awesome, I get to take a 23-month old on a cross-country flight in two weeks.

I have a cross-country flight in 14 hours.


Awesome, I'm flying from Amsterdam to the US next month.
/KLM has already changed my flight
 
2009-12-26 07:13:47 PM
I have HAD IT with the TSA. Some idiot lights a firecracker, and they implement kneejerk feel-good measures that won't do a goddamned motherf*cking thing to stop someone who really is a terrorist. And on top of that, half of the TSA goons I have encountered (both in airports and here on Fark) are mouth-breathing assholes with God complexes. They think they're Jack Bauer, but they fail to realize that they are glorified mall cops.
 
2009-12-26 07:14:52 PM
Until all passengers are stripped naked, shackled and chained to their seats, airline travel will never be safe.
 
2009-12-26 07:21:47 PM
Well, I certainly feel safer now with yet another ACT to the play at the security theater.
 
2009-12-26 07:26:47 PM
CougarJeff: Let's just start putting everyone in hibernation chambers when we check in.

i270.photobucket.com
www.alicia-logic.com

If these are my handlers I'm all for it
 
2009-12-26 07:27:43 PM
I was waiting to hear what they'd do.

My mom's flying home from Detroit today--picking her up in two hours. Curious to hear what she says.
 
2009-12-26 07:28:51 PM
ragekage: Awesome, I get to take a 23-month old on a cross-country flight in two weeks.

Kindly post your itinerary so we can avoid your flight.
 
2009-12-26 07:29:04 PM
zz9: I am struggling to think of any single measure that is as easy to get around as this. So a terrorist can't set off his bomb in the last hour? So he sets it off a few minutes earlier. Job done.

This is like saying "He was wearing a blue jacket! Lets ban all blue jackets!"


Exactly. I'm sure any potential terrorists are going to go "Well, shiat, I was supposed to set this off in the last hour but I guess that's illegal now. Darn!" They seem to be terribly focused on the legality of their actions, after all.
 
2009-12-26 07:29:45 PM
So this uberschmuck had a powder substance taped to his legs, and used a syringe of fluid to try to ignite it. So how in the holy heck does not getting up during the last hour, or not having anything on your lap help matters at all?!?!?!

As someone who has no choice but to fly 3-4 times a year for training/business, this is going to suck horribly!
 
2009-12-26 07:29:45 PM
Wow, what a reasonable and well thought out reaction.
 
2009-12-26 07:29:49 PM
A young Muslim male attempted to set off an incendiary device. Obviously, then, we must tell your white grandmother to stay in her frakking seat and pee her pants if she can't hold it.
Cause, you know, profiling is, like, wrong.
Frak you, Janet Napolitano, and the inbred, leprous horse you rode in on. It's your job to keep the motherfrakking terrorists OFF the motherfrakking plane, and you failed. The passengers saved their own arses, and you respond by PENALIZING THE PASSENGERS! You are a frakking idiot, and your president has failed to change ANYTHING.

Why don't you take a lesson from El Al, who have not experienced a hijacking since 23 July 1968.

Oh, that's right. They aren't politically correct. You frakking moron.
 
2009-12-26 07:30:00 PM
ultraholland: CougarJeff: Let's just start putting everyone in hibernation chambers when we check in.

If these are my handlers I'm all for it


BBBBBZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZT. I'd let her handle me but not Ruby... never Ruby Rod.
 
2009-12-26 07:30:01 PM
ultraholland: If these are my handlers I'm all for it

You just like the ones that cream themselves when you talk to 'em.

/Super-green!
 
2009-12-26 07:30:29 PM
So air travel is free now? I mean we pay for this bullshiat?

The only people flying in the future will be masochists.

I know I primarily use overland travel, if this keeps up if transatlantic flights become a necessity I'll drive into Mexico and depart from there. fark the USA's homeland security nonsense.
 
2009-12-26 07:31:17 PM
illegal to get up within the final hour.... mmmm Why don't they just make it illegal to try to terrorize a plane? Making a rule against it will stop the terrorists, right?
 
rpm
2009-12-26 07:32:30 PM
funsized: Exactly. I'm sure any potential terrorists are going to go "Well, shiat, I was supposed to set this off in the last hour but I guess that's illegal now. Darn!" They seem to be terribly focused on the legality of their actions, after all.

And it's easy to get around. Take exlax before the flight. Crap your pants. They'll *send* you to the bathroom, last hour or not.
 
2009-12-26 07:33:51 PM
Absolutely freakin' retarded...

Hey I have an idea, let's let the gov't control our health care too!

Thanks, Empty Suit supporters.
 
2009-12-26 07:34:26 PM
MRIman: illegal to get up within the final hour.

God forbid your plane gets put into a holding pattern... or diverted because of weather... Now it becomes illegal to get up within the final 3 hours...
 
2009-12-26 07:35:19 PM
CougarJeff: Bucky Katt: If you got to pee, don't want until the last minute to head to the loo. Either plan ahead or just whip it out and pee on the seat in front of you.

Use those little bags they give you.


I was on a domestic flight with my daughter who really needed to pee, and the stewardess (am I allowed to call them that?) told me that she couldn't give me permission to take my daughter to the lav. (But it was clear she meant that I should take my daughter to the lav.)

I don't know how many laws we broke, or what would have happened on an i11l flight.
 
2009-12-26 07:35:31 PM
Hau Ruck: It's a good thing a minority of us actually read books anymore.

This sentence makes me cry even in context.
 
2009-12-26 07:35:49 PM
Note to suicide bombers on planes: blow shiat up more than 1 hour before landing.

What a stupid farking rule.
 
2009-12-26 07:36:26 PM
DamnYankees: This country is full of and run by utter cowards. Just pathetic.

THIS.

Start strip-searching the brown-skin guys with beards. They're the ones responsible. That's not racism, that's simple statistics. (Muslim male, 17-40 years old, we've all seen that e-mail by now) But our leaders won't come out and say it. Cowards.
 
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