In reading the article, it's actually quite remarkable and socially refreshing to consider the great lengths that we (as collective adults) go to in order to make the lore of Santa Claus that much more mystical and memorable for kids. 'Flying' them around in planes and decking out an airplane hanger as the North Pole? Pretty farking cool if you ask me.

Some elves frighten me.

Sometimes come home covered in glitter as well, but it is not from dealing with elves. Also their cheap perfume has a remarkable way of transferring to others.

Gyrfalcon: Let me repeat: A special flight, for a special group of kids, exclusively to fly them to an exclusive hangar so they can pretend they're going to Santa's Workshop for the day. And they're still putting the "elves" through the TSA CHECKPOINT.



And don't you ever forget it.

http://www.theboxset.com/images/reviewcaptures/2555capture_baddersanta10.jpg

Gyrfalcon: They're searching Santa's Elves for weapons and contraband, during a Fantasy Flight for disabled kids ESPECIALLY CHARTERED so these kids think they're going to the North Pole to see Santa Claus.

Let me repeat: A special flight, for a special group of kids, exclusively to fly them to an exclusive hangar so they can pretend they're going to Santa's Workshop for the day. And they're still putting the "elves" through the TSA CHECKPOINT.

WHAT THE F*CK IS WRONG WITH THESE PEOPLE????????

They are a "special" group of kids? Why not just put them on a bus with no windows and tell them they have arrived at the North Pole after one minute of revving the engine?

TFA: Trust me - I'm an elf.

Something is very wrong with that sentence.

farking elf molesters

Jakevol2: No, don't YOU ever forget, brother.

Man, every time I see that photo, I get a little teary-eyed and think of this.

Gyrfalcon: Don't even suggest that somehow on a flight full of handicapped kids, Santa's Elves, and Alaska Airlines flight crew, that there's a non-stop first class Arab passenger carrying a box knife. The frickin' plane doesn't even leave the airport half the time.

I'm no TSA fan, but no one should get on the air side of the facility without screening.

It wasn't elf glitter. That shiat has mystical properties.

It was Stripper Glitter.

Oh. waitaminit. Stripper Glitter has mystical properties too.

/mmmmmmm.... c'mere hon. rub some glitter on me. you smell like warm cookies... what is that, bourbon vanilla? yum.

Eighty of Santa's elves were trying to get 60 kids from this year's "nice" list through security for Alaska Airline's secret Flight 1225 (get it?)

Um, no. I really don't.

Oh, wait. I just got it. Nevermind.

If I was that elf and some minimum wage jagoff was screwing with my bells, I'd have done one thing: Whipped it out, pissed in his face and said, "It's Christmas. Not Channukah (pronounced with the hard 'Ch-' for extra mockery). Not Kwanza. Christmas. This is America, and the only one who touches my American bells on Christmas is Mrs. Elf you son of a biatch"

And the other TSA employees would have been like, "Dear Lawdy, How far we've fallen!(They're probably black and say 'lawdy') Go ahead Sir, and have yourself a merry little Christmas (salute)." And the little sick kids' parents would give a respectful nod in my direction as I take up my position in the cabin where I can observe all of the 'passengers'.

/Internet Tough Elf

I long ago learned how to deal with TSA screeners. Show up in yoga pants and flip-flops and offer to strip down to your color-coordinated bra and panties set if there's the slightest trouble with your laptop bag or whatever.

It helps to act a bit River Tam and start undressing as if it's expected before saying "But don't you have to check me?" They race you through just to avoid the kerfuffle the rubbernecking in the line behind you will cause, and they usually don't so much as glance at your male companion except to ask if you're 'on some medication' the airline should know about. Works every time.

And after eight years of dance classes as a kid, I have no trouble dropping trou and revealing my bra in an airport. Shoot, before 9/11 I once tap-danced with 17 other girls my age to some jazz 'Nutcracker' music for the holidays in something not much less revealing than underwear, and with a lot more glitter, in the same airport.

/but seriously, the TSA needs to get over itself
//what the hell kind of terrorist dresses in red and green with bells?

fusillade762: Oh, wait. I just got it. Nevermind.

I almost got pissed at you for not explaining the secret code. Then I broke it in half....
/"the stupid... it burns"

voodoowizard: fusillade762: Oh, wait. I just got it. Nevermind.

I almost got pissed at you for not explaining the secret code. Then I broke it in half....
/"the stupid... it burns"

06/12/05 never remember

Glitter is the herpes of the Craft World.

Hot elf chick thread?

SpiderQueenDemon: And after eight years of dance classes as a kid, I have no trouble dropping trou and revealing my bra in an airport. Shoot, before 9/11 I once tap-danced with 17 other girls my age to some jazz 'Nutcracker' music for the holidays in something not much less revealing than underwear, and with a lot more glitter, in the same airport.

Yeah... we're gonna need to have a look at you, doll.

I read that as "...finding all the Ballson each elf..." That would have been a more reasonable headline.
****************************************************************************
Knucklepopper: Gyrfalcon: Let me repeat: A special flight, for a special group of kids, exclusively to fly them to an exclusive hangar so they can pretend they're going to Santa's Workshop for the day. And they're still putting the "elves" through the TSA CHECKPOINT.



And don't you ever forget it.

How can you stand to live like a frightened child?
I know it was a long time ago and some of us get fuzzy on the details, but none of the 9/11 hijackers were part of the little people community nor were any of them disabled children.
I really hope that post was a joke, because if it wasn't, the TERRISTS have won.
They've taken from America the things that have made it the country which we are happy to call our own.
To use the memory of the 9/11 victims to justify any outlandish insult to our freedoms is a disgusting perversion of their honor.

DIAF, douche.

tonguedepressor: You rabble rouse against the TSA, my income provider, and I agree with you sometimes and on some points.

I wish the farkers would call me for my "airport assessment" i've had my application in since February.

"Elf glitter"

So that's what the kids are calling it these days...

ratboy: How can you stand to live like a frightened child?
I know it was a long time ago and some of us get fuzzy on the details, but none of the 9/11 hijackers were part of the little people community nor were any of them disabled children.
I really hope that post was a joke, because if it wasn't, the TERRISTS have won.
They've taken from America the things that have made it the country which we are happy to call our own.
To use the memory of the 9/11 victims to justify any outlandish insult to our freedoms is a disgusting perversion of their honor.

DIAF, douche.

I won't presume to put words in the other guy's mouth, but I think the fairly obvious intent of posting that picture, as a response to a "What the hell is the TSAs problem?" type of question, is inherent in the frenzied, "ZOMG Panic!!" nature of the picture itself. Which is to say, the TSA is acting the way it does precisely because people are still living in fear over that event, which means the TERRISTS won, etc.

So you see, your objection was the result of misunderstanding the point.

I wonder if Blisters was on this flight.

romero reporting: we're all going to die and people are afraid of that. more at 11.

AntiNorm: You know who else had subordinates who were just following orders?

That is one of the ballsiest non-joking Godwins that I've seen in a long time.