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(ABC News)   You still have a better chance of playing pick-up sticks with your butt cheeks than making your flight back east in time for Christmas, but at least now you won't have to spend 12 hours sitting in a stranded airplane doing it   (abcnews.go.com ) divider line
    More: PSA  
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7652 clicks; posted to Main » on 21 Dec 2009 at 12:38 PM (6 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



114 Comments     (+0 »)
 


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2009-12-21 11:37:21 AM  
I saw a stripper once that could play pickup sticks with her butt cheeks while she crushed beer cans with her tata's
 
2009-12-21 11:47:21 AM  
Sounds like the perfect opportunity to strike up a conversation with a shower curtain ring salesman.
 
2009-12-21 11:50:08 AM  
And yet Obama does nothing. This is worse than Katrina.
 
2009-12-21 11:54:11 AM  
Two reasons I'm glad I'm no longer a TV reporter:

No more "team coverage" of a storm that usually had me reporting from an overpass telling people "do not travel" while I wondered how I would be getting home.

No more "man on the street" interviews at the airport where I talked to people who were OUTRAGED that their flight wouldn't leave on time despite the 3" snowfall per hour and 50+mph winds.
 
2009-12-21 11:58:53 AM  
jehovahs witness protection: I saw a stripper once that could play pickup sticks with her butt cheeks while she crushed beer cans with her tata's

Blondie at the Clermont in Atlanta?
 
2009-12-21 12:24:04 PM  
eh, my family got in fine last night into BWI.
 
2009-12-21 12:40:24 PM  

elvisaintdead: jehovahs witness protection: I saw a stripper once that could play pickup sticks with her butt cheeks while she crushed beer cans with her tata's

Blondie at the Clermont in Atlanta?


You know it.
 
2009-12-21 12:40:53 PM  
No "three-legged ballerina" reference yet?
 
2009-12-21 12:41:15 PM  
Sounds like a challenge.
 
2009-12-21 12:41:18 PM  

jehovahs witness protection: I saw a stripper once that could play pickup sticks with her butt cheeks while she crushed beer cans with her tata's


Mom?
 
2009-12-21 12:41:32 PM  
The new rules are expected to take effect in April 2010.

yeah.. just in time for Christmas.
 
2009-12-21 12:41:35 PM  

elvisaintdead: jehovahs witness protection: I saw a stripper once that could play pickup sticks with her butt cheeks while she crushed beer cans with her tata's

Blondie at the Clermont in Atlanta?


Mom?

Oh, nope. She never worked at the Atlanta Clermont...
 
2009-12-21 12:42:04 PM  
It's actually not to hard. The trick is to fart to move one of the sticks off the pile (no contact), then lift it.
 
2009-12-21 12:42:32 PM  
Just more time to listen to my wife biatch.

\nurses the business end of a .38
 
2009-12-21 12:42:38 PM  
I got lucky and left just before the store blew in. No delays but was scary landing in the snow. Never done that before.
 
Bf+
2009-12-21 12:42:54 PM  

markie_farkie: Sounds like the perfect opportunity to strike up a conversation with a shower curtain ring salesman.


www.ugo.com
I still lose it every time I see this.
 
2009-12-21 12:44:38 PM  
Hey Smitty, the rules don't apply until April. Enjoy sitting on the Tarmac strapped to your seat for hours this Christmas.
 
2009-12-21 12:45:44 PM  

jehovahs witness protection: elvisaintdead: jehovahs witness protection: I saw a stripper once that could play pickup sticks with her butt cheeks while she crushed beer cans with her tata's

Blondie at the Clermont in Atlanta?

You know it.


I've never seen Blondie pick up sticks, and I'm a regular.
 
2009-12-21 12:46:09 PM  
Out of curiosity, can someone point me a Federal Register page reference for these new regulations?
 
2009-12-21 12:48:22 PM  
I can't imagine being stuck in a plane for 8 hours. I would go insane. I'd probably end up deploying the evacuation slide. I'd get arrested but no jury on earth would convict me.
 
2009-12-21 12:48:50 PM  
"The Canadian Mounted" FTW

/We were robbed!
 
2009-12-21 12:50:12 PM  
The agency says carriers will be exempt from the fines if a pilot believes safety or security is at risk or if air traffic controllers advise the pilot not to return to the terminal.

And there's the "out"... "Hello folks this is your Captain speaking...uuuuhhh....I'm sorry for the....uhhhhhh....Delay. but we've been advised by air traffic control....uuuuhhh...that we shouldn't give a shiat about your "rights"..ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha...I'm sorry about that outbust folks....uuuuhhhh.... so you all WILL be sitting here until....uuhhhh...Febuary."
 
2009-12-21 12:51:01 PM  
I'm going from AZ to FL direct. I don't want to hear sh*t about some blizzard holding up my flight.
 
2009-12-21 12:51:07 PM  
ps...those aren't pillows.
 
2009-12-21 12:51:13 PM  

Rapmaster2000: jehovahs witness protection: elvisaintdead: jehovahs witness protection: I saw a stripper once that could play pickup sticks with her butt cheeks while she crushed beer cans with her tata's

Blondie at the Clermont in Atlanta?

You know it.

I've never seen Blondie pick up sticks, and I'm a regular.


Try the VIP room...ahem....behind the dumpster.
 
exi
2009-12-21 12:51:39 PM  

elvisaintdead: jehovahs witness protection: I saw a stripper once that could play pickup sticks with her butt cheeks while she crushed beer cans with her tata's

Blondie at the Clermont in Atlanta?


Miss Scarlet in the library with the rope?
 
2009-12-21 12:52:56 PM  
Three hours?!?!?! Fark that. That's two hours too damn long.
 
2009-12-21 12:53:23 PM  
Great reference, great movie.

"Do you know what would make me happy?"

"A couple sets of balls and an extra set of fingers?"
 
2009-12-21 12:54:04 PM  
why would anybody want to fly east for christmas?
Arizona, baby! 73 degrees!
 
2009-12-21 12:54:45 PM  
Only been stuck once on the tarmac, for 5 hours due to weather.

They made us watch Miss Congeniality. That was a tough one.
 
2009-12-21 12:56:13 PM  
great. instead of waiting on the runway for a few hours and getting home the airlines will just cancel your flight altogether.

dumb.
 
2009-12-21 12:56:22 PM  

dogfood: Only been stuck once on the tarmac, for 5 hours due to weather.

They made us watch Miss Congeniality. That was a tough one.


Did they at least give you barf bags???
 
2009-12-21 12:56:35 PM  
As long as I get to listen to "Let It Snow", I'm OK.
 
2009-12-21 12:57:28 PM  
Airlines will be slapped with a $27,500 fine per passenger, per violation, according to LaHood........

The agency says carriers will be exempt from the fines if a pilot believes safety or security is at risk or if air traffic controllers advise the pilot not to return to the terminal.


Anybody else got the feeling that some of them union boys are gonna be pickin up some folding money by "advising" the pilot not to return to the terminal?
 
2009-12-21 12:57:59 PM  

Scorched Colon: Three hours?!?!?! Fark that. That's two hours too damn long.


This.

And the airlines still biatched about 3 hours. Their execs should be forced to sit in the plane with the stranded passengers. That'll get things moving.
 
2009-12-21 12:59:08 PM  

dogfood: Only been stuck once on the tarmac, for 5 hours due to weather.

They made us watch Miss Congeniality. That was a tough one.


Four hours, Mama Mia here.
Hint: If after a number 3 start failure, you see a mechanic pulling parts off of the engine, it's going to be more than 30 minutes, no matter what the pilot says over the intercom. Watching the mechanic work was much more interesting than that "movie"
 
2009-12-21 12:59:40 PM  

Ponzholio: elvisaintdead: jehovahs witness protection: I saw a stripper once that could play pickup sticks with her butt cheeks while she crushed beer cans with her tata's

Blondie at the Clermont in Atlanta?

Mom?

Oh, nope. She never worked at the Atlanta Clermont...


Wikipedia never lies doe it do they?

"The Clermont does not serve food or draft beer. The single stripper's stage is located in the middle of a circular bar, and the dancers choose their own songs on the in-house jukebox, as the club normally does not have an actual DJ, except for Saturday nights when DJ Romeo Cologne packs the club spinning Dance Party Funk since 1995. The Clermont is perhaps best-known for featuring some dancers who do not meet the traditional physical standards for strippers, the most famous of whom is Blondie, noted for her ability to completely flatten empty beer cans between her breasts as well as for her poetry."
 
2009-12-21 12:59:54 PM  
"Trains, Planes and Automobiles": both John Candy and Steve Martin's greatest movie ever?
 
2009-12-21 01:00:54 PM  
Nature has provided alot of cheaters convenient excuses this week. I expect to hear about an influx of new born bastard babies in nine months.
 
2009-12-21 01:01:10 PM  
Getting stuck on a Eurostar is still possible.
 
2009-12-21 01:02:09 PM  
Hmmm.

Drive to the airport .... one hour?
Check in one hour early .... one hour
Sit on tarmac for 7 hours .... seven hours
Actual plane flight ..... two hours?
Rent car and drive from airport to
destination .... two hours?

13 hours portal to portal for a two hour flight?

Are the airlines trying to force people to drive?

Numbers don't work for coast to coast flights, obviously
 
2009-12-21 01:02:46 PM  

Fish in a Barrel: "Trains, Planes and Automobiles": both John Candy and Steve Martin's greatest movie ever?


mcsiegs: Great reference, great movie.

"Do you know what would make me happy?"

"A couple sets of balls and an extra set of fingers?"


"I've never seen a man get picked up by his testicles before."

Lotta nut jokes in that movie, now that I think about it.
 
2009-12-21 01:03:00 PM  

jehovahs witness protection: I saw a stripper once that could play pickup sticks with her butt cheeks while she crushed beer cans with her tata's


Is this her? No nudity but probably NSFW.
 
2009-12-21 01:03:28 PM  

Needlessly Complicated: I can't imagine being stuck in a plane for 8 hours. I would go insane. I'd probably end up deploying the evacuation slide. I'd get arrested but no jury on earth would convict me.


Yeah. I think I'd snap if they tried to keep me overnight. Not in a heroic "I'll get us out of this!" kind of way, just a total twitching spaz requiring police and/or medical assistance.
 
2009-12-21 01:04:28 PM  

Fish in a Barrel: "Trains, Planes and Automobiles": both John Candy and Steve Martin's greatest movie ever?


Yeah. Distant second & third for Martin- Three Amigos and The Jerk.
John Candy- Space Balls and Uncle Buck
 
2009-12-21 01:05:27 PM  
Lesson learned - you'd better travel by train.

Just remember that train don' run outta Wichita, less'n yer a hog er a cattle. People train run outa St...Stubville.
 
2009-12-21 01:08:35 PM  

Dirtybird971: ps...those aren't pillows.



THIS!

/Leaving happy!
 
2009-12-21 01:08:48 PM  

buzzcut73: Four hours, Mama Mia here.
Hint: If after a number 3 start failure, you see a mechanic pulling parts off of the engine, it's going to be more than 30 minutes, no matter what the pilot says over the intercom. Watching the mechanic work was much more interesting than that "movie"


I'm so, so sorry.

I got trapped on the tarmac for a few hours once. The air conditioner kicked out, but I just rolled down the window and got the breeze.
 
2009-12-21 01:08:56 PM  
Car Rental Agent: [cheerfully] Welcome to Marathon, may I help you?

Neal: Yes.

Car Rental Agent: How may I help you?

Neal: You can start by wiping that farking dumb-ass smile off your rosey, farking, cheeks! Then you can give me a farking automobile: a farking Datsun, a farking Toyota, a farking Mustang, a farking Buick! Four farking wheels and a seat!

Car Rental Agent: I really don't care for the way you're speaking to me.

Neal: And I really don't care for the way your company left me in the middle of farking nowhere with farking keys to a farking car that isn't farking there. And I really didn't care to farking walk down a farking highway and across a farking runway to get back here to have you smile in my farking face. I want a farking car RIGHT farkING NOW!

Car Rental Agent: May I see your rental agreement?

Neal: I threw it away.

Car Rental Agent: Oh boy.

Neal: Oh boy, what?

Car Rental Agent: You're farked!
 
2009-12-21 01:09:38 PM  

jtown: jehovahs witness protection: I saw a stripper once that could play pickup sticks with her butt cheeks while she crushed beer cans with her tata's

Is this her? No nudity but probably NSFW.


Nope. Blondie is a rather large woman of color.
 
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