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(SanDiegoUnionTribune)   Mexico wants you to know Tijuana is not all about cheap tequila, diseased whores, and corrupt cops. There's a new, improved police force in the works, equipped with bilingual traffic tickets   (signonsandiego.com) divider line 69
    More: Interesting, Tijuana, traffic tickets, Mexican, city planning, San Diego Police Department, Metropolitan Tourist Police, Giovanni Malinchrynni, Avenida Internacional Bulevar 2000  
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4672 clicks; posted to Main » on 20 Dec 2009 at 1:27 AM (4 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2009-12-20 01:30:18 AM
Huh. It's not all about cheap tequila, diseased whores, and corrupt cops anymore?

There go MY vacation plans.
 
2009-12-20 01:31:57 AM
joegekko: Huh. It's not all about cheap tequila, diseased whores, and corrupt cops anymore?

There go MY vacation plans.


That's never been all of Tijuana, there's also the explosive diarrhea afterward.
 
2009-12-20 01:34:52 AM
of course subby

there's also the donkey show
 
2009-12-20 01:36:03 AM
What I want to know is how this impacts the Donkey Shows.

/summon gorgor
 
2009-12-20 01:37:17 AM
If you're American, it's all about being kidnapped, tortured and having your brains blown out.

DO NOT GO TO MEXICO!!!

It aint like it used to be.
 
2009-12-20 01:37:48 AM
Can I just get a cheap whore, a diseased cop, and some corrupt tequila? But not in that order.
 
2009-12-20 01:39:01 AM
I was in Tijuana less than a year ago, and it was the saddest, most depressing place I've ever been, and I've been to Disney World.

I did get cheap tequila, though.
 
2009-12-20 01:39:20 AM
Tyranicle: If you're American, it's all about being kidnapped, tortured and having your brains blown out.

DO NOT GO TO MEXICO!!!

It aint like it used to be.


man mexico has changed so much in the last year

but then again i was in puerto vallarta, and not on the border
 
2009-12-20 01:40:08 AM
Hector Remarkable: Can I just get a cheap whore, a diseased cop, and some corrupt tequila? But not in that order.

i can get ya tequilla made in oklahoma, but you'll have to provide your own cop and whore
 
2009-12-20 01:42:18 AM
man oh man... over 7,000 murders in Mexico this year due to the drug wars.
 
2009-12-20 01:45:44 AM
That's okay. I hear if you have enough money you can do ANYTHING in the USA. I also hear that anything in the USA is like 2x more in Mexico, but only when it applies to crime, drugs, and sex.

/got no point.
 
2009-12-20 01:46:37 AM
I thought all of the cops were already beheaded by those drug cartel guys?
 
2009-12-20 01:46:56 AM
loonatic112358: but then again i was in puerto vallarta, and not on the border

The border is bad, man. For a while, the Houston media was reporting on it. Then... it was like they just couldn't believe it anymore, and stopped. Even the lefty rags barely mention what's going on.
 
2009-12-20 01:49:18 AM
Jaws_Victim: That's okay. I hear if you have enough money you can do ANYTHING in the USA. I also hear that anything in the USA is like 2x more in Mexico, but only when it applies to crime, drugs, and sex.

/got no point.


You're exactly right. You have no point. Stay in school.
 
2009-12-20 01:50:52 AM
joegekko: loonatic112358: but then again i was in puerto vallarta, and not on the border

The border is bad, man. For a while, the Houston media was reporting on it. Then... it was like they just couldn't believe it anymore, and stopped. Even the lefty rags barely mention what's going on.


i've known about the border being bad for years

it was bad even before it started making the news outside of texas
 
2009-12-20 01:52:42 AM
Picture of new police force:
i229.photobucket.com
 
2009-12-20 01:55:35 AM
a bunch of us from the office went to tijuana on a late night excursion. we stuck together and were left alone except for the pregnant hookers following us.
 
2009-12-20 01:56:03 AM
Tyranicle: Jaws_Victim: That's okay. I hear if you have enough money you can do ANYTHING in the USA. I also hear that anything in the USA is like 2x more in Mexico, but only when it applies to crime, drugs, and sex.

/got no point.

You're exactly right. You have no point. Stay in school.


They kicked me out :( Now I make Johnny Knoxville movies.
 
2009-12-20 01:57:18 AM
At least clean up the drug violence first. No interest in being anywhere near that.
 
2009-12-20 01:57:41 AM
and how to interact with U.S. tourists

"We-o are here to help-o. No kidnap-o you."
 
2009-12-20 02:05:15 AM
Gosling: At least clean up the drug violence first. No interest in being anywhere near that.

It'll go away as soon as the US ends the war on some drugs.
 
2009-12-20 02:07:10 AM
GWSuperfan: Gosling: At least clean up the drug violence first. No interest in being anywhere near that.

It'll go away as soon as the US ends the war on some drugs.


Suuuure it will.
 
2009-12-20 02:09:49 AM
Does that mean there will be 350 more people with machine guns add to ones vacation memories?
 
2009-12-20 02:10:49 AM
I lived in Tijuana for 9 months pre 9/11 when I was stationed in San Diego. It was the greatest time of my life, and not without the element of danger.

Even then, we were warned not to go there. As long as you keep your wits together and your nose clean, you'll be fine. Even now.

The reason people get kidnapped and killed is because they get drunk and act like idiots.
 
2009-12-20 02:15:09 AM
GWSuperfan: Gosling: At least clean up the drug violence first. No interest in being anywhere near that.

It'll go away as soon as the US ends the war on some drugs.


The drug cartels are going to win. Mexico will soon become Bolivia. Once that happens, we'll have a much bigger problem on our hands than "terrorists". It'll start in the south and spread north like herpes.

\cheap drug prices that is
\\if you like that sort of thang
 
2009-12-20 02:20:43 AM
just passing through: I thought all of the cops were already beheaded by those drug cartel guys?

hese are just helping tourists, not actually doing any real police work, sticking their noses in drug cartels' affairs.
 
2009-12-20 02:32:05 AM
GratuityIncluded: GWSuperfan: Gosling: At least clean up the drug violence first. No interest in being anywhere near that.

It'll go away as soon as the US ends the war on some drugs.

Suuuure it will.


It is certainly part of the problem and can be part of the solution.

That said, Mexico's biggest problem is corruption with a side-dish of bureaucracy. I have had (anecdotal warning! what follows is not valid for dicussion, 'tis but a rant of mine) 4 encounters with Mexican police and all but one have ended in a bribe attempt or some other form of intimidation.

First time I gave in 'cause I was scared. The next two I just told them to sod off and give me the ticket. I was lucky and they only threatened me with making sure my whole day would be wasted (they seized my license plates because I entered a restricted street. It was my mistake and they were right to ticket me but taking the plates away? wtf?) but I knew that and couldn't care less so I rolled with it. Took me the whole damned day and a bunch of pesos to get them back.

It is not at all surprising corruption is so prevalent, though. Cops get paid so little it's pretty much all just a sick joke.

According to this article Link (new window)a cop gets up to 600-ish USD a month and as little as 200-ish.

Friend of mine in Guadalajara told me about some job-hunting he was doing and he said he found an engineering position as a safety inspector for the mining industry (don't know the details, sorry) and he was being offered something around 1,300 USD a month.

An apartment there goes for about 500 and food is about 300. Add another 200 for transportation and he is expected to get by on 300. For a qualified professional in his field.

Miners have been dying left and right in Mexico so one would expect a position like that to be fairly high in the priority list re incentives and government support. Yeah, right.

/rant over
//sorry, i know tl;dr
/it could be such a nice place...
 
2009-12-20 02:36:38 AM
If you're an American in TJ for the booze and cheap whores you aren't going to get killed in a drug shootout.

Now, you do have to worry about getting kidnapped or mugged by some ratero that can't make it over the border. The corrupt cops are real, but if you aren't breaking any laws and you politely decline to bribe them, eventually they'll leave you alone. The whores aren't any more diseased than ones in the US, and you have to look pretty hard to find ones that have a penis.

TJ isn't a good place to get drunk, and you have know what is going on around you. And figure everyone is out to screw you over. But once you get past that, the folks are pretty nice.
 
2009-12-20 02:47:38 AM
joegekko: Huh. It's not all about cheap tequila, diseased whores, and corrupt cops anymore?

There go MY vacation plans.


Don't worry, Ciudad Juarez is still about cheap boose, prostitutes, and cops. Don't worry about all the murder hype. It's a 2 mil. population city, some things are bound to happen.
 
2009-12-20 02:57:14 AM
I went to Tijuana once. Too many Mexicans.
 
2009-12-20 03:14:37 AM
Tijuana? or do you mean California?

/DNRTA
//don't care to either
 
2009-12-20 03:18:35 AM
hah, even The Googles knows about Tijuana's donkey show. It shows up as a suggestion if you just type Tijuana.
 
2009-12-20 03:35:27 AM
Is TJ like Reynosa, where the border guards wave you through, but then the army searches you? That's always a good sign.
 
2009-12-20 03:42:55 AM
While driving through TJ I once got pulled over for speeding despite being the slowest car on the highway. We happily paid our $100 gringo tax.
 
2009-12-20 03:43:05 AM
Tijuana shut down the donkey shows in the 70's. No such thing anymore.

However, there are a lot of guys that will ask you if you're interested in going to a donkey show. They are not taking you to a donkey show, they are taking you to an alley where their friends are waiting.

I was in a Tijuana market one night, and had to take a leak. There were no bathrooms anywhere, so I went behind a dumpster. There was a cop back there waiting for people to urinate behind the dumpster. Wow.

He asked me for an ID, so I gave him an Andrew Jackson, and he let me go.

That being said, there are fewer things more terrifying than bribing a police officer in Tijuana for the first time, no matter how you slice it.

After that, it was a breeze.

They also have a nifty setup in the club bathrooms. Guy offers coke, you buy it, go into the stall. You get busted by a cop. Pay off the cop, he takes your stuff, and gives it back to the salesman. Brilliant.
 
2009-12-20 04:01:56 AM
TacosandGuns: They also have a nifty setup in the club bathrooms. Guy offers coke, you buy it, go into the stall. You get busted by a cop. Pay off the cop, he takes your stuff, and gives it back to the salesman. Brilliant.

Man, why even bother being a real cop. Just put on a uniform and anyone can pull the same gag.
 
HBK
2009-12-20 04:02:55 AM
Krieghund: If you're an American in TJ for the booze and cheap whores you aren't going to get killed in a drug shootout.

Now, you do have to worry about getting kidnapped or mugged by some ratero that can't make it over the border. The corrupt cops are real, but if you aren't breaking any laws and you politely decline to bribe them, eventually they'll leave you alone. The whores aren't any more diseased than ones in the US, and you have to look pretty hard to find ones that have a penis.

TJ isn't a good place to get drunk, and you have know what is going on around you. And figure everyone is out to screw you over. But once you get past that, the folks are pretty nice.


The same can't be said about Nuevo Laredo.

/hilarious story
//not about me
 
2009-12-20 04:14:26 AM
I would tell you a cool story about drinking tequila in Mexico, but I can't remember any. That's how I know the tequila worked.
 
2009-12-20 06:21:34 AM
In other words:

Los cerdos van gruñido y chillan!
 
2009-12-20 08:27:09 AM
Heh, beaners are funny. I mean yeah they can be lazy and slothlike but when you get right down to it, they can ride on donkeys and go: "HEEEEEY PEDRO, You seester iss muye grando!" And fire their pistols in the air while laughing with bits of taco flying out their mouths.
 
2009-12-20 08:34:06 AM
TacosandGuns: I lived in Tijuana for 9 months pre 9/11 when I was stationed in San Diego. It was the greatest time of my life, and not without the element of danger.

Even then, we were warned not to go there. As long as you keep your wits together and your nose clean, you'll be fine. Even now.

The reason people get kidnapped and killed is because they get drunk and act like idiots.


Well then if you can't get drunk and act like an idiot, whats the point of going their? to sit around a bar and have your wits about you?
 
2009-12-20 08:42:24 AM
How do Mexicans know when they are hungry? Their asshole stops burning.
 
2009-12-20 09:41:07 AM
pubes: Heh, beaners are funny. I mean yeah they can be lazy and slothlike but when you get right down to it, they can ride on donkeys and go: "HEEEEEY PEDRO, You seester iss muye grando!" And fire their pistols in the air while laughing with bits of taco flying out their mouths.

Not exactly sure why, but that made me lol on shabbos.
 
2009-12-20 10:09:46 AM
GWSuperfan: Gosling: At least clean up the drug violence first. No interest in being anywhere near that.

It'll go away as soon as the US ends the war on some drugs.


Just like ending prohibition ended organized crime.

I know people who still go doswn to Rosrito and Ensenada once in a while. They say it's like going to ghost towns, compared to what it used to be. All the places that used to cater to American visitors are either out of business or closed. The bordertown economies are devastated
 
2009-12-20 10:25:24 AM
TacosandGuns: They also have a nifty setup in the club bathrooms. Guy offers coke, you buy it, go into the stall. You get busted by a cop. Pay off the cop, he takes your stuff, and gives it back to the salesman. Brilliant.

I would thank someone who stopped me from ingesting powder I bought from a stranger in a bathroom in Tijuana.
 
2009-12-20 10:33:05 AM
GratuityIncluded: GWSuperfan: Gosling: At least clean up the drug violence first. No interest in being anywhere near that.

It'll go away as soon as the US ends the war on some drugs.

Suuuure it will.


When was the last time a Miller route driver shot up a Walmart because he saw an Anheuser Busch route driver making a delivery there?
 
2009-12-20 11:03:15 AM
NeedleGuy: man oh man... over 7,000 murders in Mexico this year due to the drug wars.

Over 16,000 murders in the US this year due to stupid people shooting each other.
 
2009-12-20 11:22:52 AM
img690.imageshack.us

/pass the tequila
 
2009-12-20 11:36:40 AM
bingo the psych-o: NeedleGuy: man oh man... over 7,000 murders in Mexico this year due to the drug wars.

Over 16,000 murders in the US this year due to stupid people shooting each other.


Pretty confident Mexico still wins on a homicide per capita basis. Also, we have fewer beheadings and death by torture. Way fewer.
 
2009-12-20 11:44:49 AM
bingo the psych-o: NeedleGuy: man oh man... over 7,000 murders in Mexico this year due to the drug wars.

Over 16,000 murders in the US this year due to stupid people shooting each other.


Well, it's a start, isn't it?
 
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