I'll get the ball rolling with my favorite

Listerine: tacky christmas parties are so played out and farking annoying

Tacky Christmas parties have lost all their ironic value and are now back to just being tacky.

I think this happened as soon as they appeared on the "Stuff White People Like" list.

I came here for the clown sweater.

"Laura let out of the house wearing that sweater? It's a Cosby sweater. A COSBY SWEATER!"

Lazy hipsters....

Goodwill / Value Village / Salvation Army.

If you try even the slightest, you'll find a horrible holiday sweater.

That said, I'm touchy on the phrase 'ironic hipster' since I've been falsely accused of that in the past. I wasn't a hipster, 'cause I didn't care. I just had the unfortunate timing that hipster girls started adapting my style a year or two after I embraced it. By 'embraced' I mean 'felt the most comfortable / was easiest to wear skirts. You get the plus of being on top of the wave of fashion, but the downside is everyone assumed you're following a trend.

Also you can like Journey and ABBA unironically, dammit.

For the record (while we're talking about hipsters), I started drinking PBR because it was the cheapest beer you could buy for a keg party that wasn't completely crap. Then I got used to the taste of it, so it's my go-to cheap beer. Well, PBR and Strohs.

But if PBR >> cheapest beer in the bar/venue/etc., I can skip the PBR.

Rohasman: Forsythe P. Jones: Ahhh, the time of year we can break out the Gem Sweaters:

That model is SO thrilled to be there...

Her bumpit is hurting her scalp.

milkyshirt: EggFool: bumpit

Can I take this as an opportunity to biatch about those godawful Bumpits things? Because damn, those things really just look stupid as hell. They make the women in the advertisements look like cone heads. Although, I can't say I've noticed anyone actually wearing one of those things in real life. Who's buying them?

Only the angry woman in the above photograph, apparently. She is less than pleased with both the bumpit purchase and her sweater selection, now that she thinks about it.

She comes in colors everywhere: but what does this have to do with cows?

Well, wearing sweaters can make you thirsty, if it's too hot out. So then you crave a burger.

grimnir: milkyshirt: Can I take this as an opportunity to biatch about those godawful Bumpits things?

I don't know what this is, but I keep reading "bum pits". Which sounds godawful, I have to admit, whatever it is.

See the angry fat girl with the weirdly high hair? It's a thing that sits on your head under your hair to make your hair look bigger. It seems to make people angry.

Renowned transvestite sexologist: There's no stains on them. They've obviously been washed recently. Those sweaters aren't ugly enough for hipsters.

You're thinking of hippies. Hipsters still wash stuff, but they deny it.

Urinal Cake Mix:
You're thinking of hippies. Hipsters still wash stuff, but they deny it.

Or put their jeans in the freezer when they start to smell.



GAAAAH! How could this help? I hope he didn't keep any food in that freezer.

/Of course he didn't - he was a person who froze his pants rather than washing them.

//I presume he's passed away of unnatural causes?

milkyshirt: EggFool: bumpit

Can I take this as an opportunity to biatch about those godawful Bumpits things? Because damn, those things really just look stupid as hell. They make the women in the advertisements look like cone heads. Although, I can't say I've noticed anyone actually wearing one of those things in real life. Who's buying them?

I admit, I bought one. It made me look like Amy Winehouse.