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(Houston Chronicle) Interesting There has been a Tiger Woods sighting near Houston. Wait what? Oh someone saw a tiger in the woods near Houston. Ohhhhh. Well, I'm sorry. Never mind   (chron.com) divider line 51
More: Interesting, Brazoria County town, Houston Chronicle  
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4545 clicks; posted to Main » on 18 Dec 2009 at 3:44 PM   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»   |    Get this fabulous T-Shirt and impress the methane out of your friends! shirt it!



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2009-12-18 12:25:51 PM
"They thought it was a cougar," he said. "They shined the spotlight on it and it ran away."

Yeah, they usually prefer dim lighting.
 
2009-12-18 12:52:15 PM
Sybarite: "They thought it was a cougar," he said. "They shined the spotlight on it and it ran away."

Yeah, they usually prefer dim lighting.


A trait they share with cocktail waitresses.
 
2009-12-18 01:19:37 PM
Shouldn't this article wait until tomorrow?
 
2009-12-18 02:05:51 PM
What no Emily Litella *biatch* reference yet?
 
2009-12-18 02:36:48 PM
I have a feeling that if a real, honest-to-god tiger was in those woods, it wouldn't be quite so hard to find.
 
2009-12-18 02:48:49 PM
Nah, a very pent up Tiger Woods is on his boat, beating his dick like it was Phil Mickelson
 
2009-12-18 03:46:52 PM
TheOther: Sybarite: "They thought it was a cougar," he said. "They shined the spotlight on it and it ran away."

Yeah, they usually prefer dim lighting.

A trait they share with cocktail waitresses.


Just because they always tell you to leave the light off...
 
2009-12-18 03:49:28 PM
Well, we know it wasn't Chris Henry.
 
2009-12-18 03:50:47 PM
TheOther: Sybarite: "They thought it was a cougar," he said. "They shined the spotlight on it and it ran away."

Yeah, they usually prefer dim lighting.

A trait they share with cocktail waitresses.


And strippers
 
2009-12-18 03:51:12 PM
Say what?

t0.gstatic.com
 
2009-12-18 03:53:07 PM
A tiger?

In Africa Houston?
 
2009-12-18 03:55:22 PM
I sure it would be more comfortable around Hillcroft in Houston rather than Oyster Creek...

/just sayin'
 
2009-12-18 03:56:03 PM
www.saynotocrack.com
Why does this remind me of Tiger with his mistresses?
 
2009-12-18 04:00:37 PM
Il Douchey: Nah, a very pent up Tiger Woods is on his boat, beating his dick like it was Phil Mickelson
LOL'd
 
2009-12-18 04:08:03 PM
TheOther: Sybarite: "They thought it was a cougar," he said. "They shined the spotlight on it and it ran away."
Yeah, they usually prefer dim lighting.

A trait they share with cocktail waitresses.


After reading Fark threads about older women, I want not only the lights off, but the guy has to be wearing a blindfold.
 
2009-12-18 04:13:37 PM
Tiger Woods is going after cougars near Houston?
 
2009-12-18 04:24:20 PM
I like this headline.

+1
 
2009-12-18 04:25:19 PM
You Mean a cheetaH ?
 
2009-12-18 04:28:35 PM
Tiggers are bouncy pouncy.
 
2009-12-18 04:29:46 PM
i244.photobucket.com
Wanted for questioning.
 
2009-12-18 04:30:00 PM
Sybarite: "They thought it was a cougar," he said. "They shined the spotlight on it and it ran away."

Yeah, they usually prefer dim lighting.


art.penny-arcade.com

/cougar?
 
2009-12-18 04:32:01 PM
Good job submitter!
 
2009-12-18 04:32:28 PM
johnpiercy: You Mean a cheetaH ?

This would have been a better application of a spot light, yes.
 
2009-12-18 04:37:11 PM
Wow.

This is amazing. I grew up in Oyster Creek and have been reading Fark for years. Never in my wildest dreams did I think my hometown of 1100 people would have news that would be featured on Fark.
 
2009-12-18 04:38:04 PM
thisguy369: Wow.

This is amazing. I grew up in Oyster Creek and have been reading Fark for years. Never in my wildest dreams did I think my hometown of 1100 people would have news that would be featured on Fark.


Where da cougars at?
 
2009-12-18 04:44:47 PM
FTFA: Rexses said the most recent sighting, bringing total reports to a handful, came just this morning.

Is that the official total? One handful?

/That's some fine reporting there, Lou
 
2009-12-18 04:50:08 PM
thisguy369: Wow.

This is amazing. I grew up in Oyster Creek and have been reading Fark for years. Never in my wildest dreams did I think my hometown of 1100 people would have news that would be featured on Fark.


I'm originally from Lake Jackson, which is much closer to Oyster Creek than Houston, and I was dismayed to find MY hometown featured in an article describing a woman killing her husband with an alcohol enema administered in sex play.

Oyster Creek is 59.6 miles from Houston and it takes one hour and eleven minutes if you consult Mapquest. So calling this "near Houston" is a stretch even if you are from TX.
 
2009-12-18 05:03:41 PM
thatguy369

Were you in BPHS's class of '93 or so and have a group of friends known by most as "The Family"? Just curious...
 
2009-12-18 05:05:49 PM
Il Douchey: Nah, a very pent up Tiger Woods is on his boat,having a mistress beating his dick like it was Phil Mickelson
FTFY
 
2009-12-18 05:06:37 PM
Cheetah in the woods.watch out ladies.......
 
2009-12-18 05:07:18 PM
So to recap: Brazoria County is now famous for alcoholic enemas, loose tigers, Selena and Ron Paul.
 
2009-12-18 05:09:30 PM
No, I graduated from Brazosport in '05
 
2009-12-18 05:15:47 PM
semi-related. i had the tv on while i was doing some cleaning earlier today and the show on was "yes, dear". i stopped for a break somewhere around 1/2 way through the episode, and there was a very brief little exchange between the two actors that dealt with tiger woods and sex. i don't think i would have been amused when the show aired in 2005, but it made me laugh today

here's what episode it was from. i can find the episode streaming online, but i can't find anywhere to download it and cut out that one segment (i'm sure it's easy, but i've never messed with video)

/tangent
//if anyone cuts it up, let me know :-)
 
2009-12-18 05:22:42 PM
NannyStatePark: thisguy369: Wow.

This is amazing. I grew up in Oyster Creek and have been reading Fark for years. Never in my wildest dreams did I think my hometown of 1100 people would have news that would be featured on Fark.

I'm originally from Lake Jackson, which is much closer to Oyster Creek than Houston, and I was dismayed to find MY hometown featured in an article describing a woman killing her husband with an alcohol enema administered in sex play.

Oyster Creek is 59.6 miles from Houston and it takes one hour and eleven minutes if you consult Mapquest. So calling this "near Houston" is a stretch even if you are from TX.


Don't you know that anything that is closer to Houston than it is either Dallas, Austin, Galveston, or San Antonio is technically a part of Houston?
 
2009-12-18 05:34:07 PM
It's just a big ol' kittycat, y'all, ain't nothin' to fear! Just g'wan up and give it a scratch under the chin, it'll follow y'all home!

farm4.static.flickr.com

/might thin out the Texans some
 
2009-12-18 05:37:30 PM
the money is in the banana stand: NannyStatePark: thisguy369: Wow.

This is amazing. I grew up in Oyster Creek and have been reading Fark for years. Never in my wildest dreams did I think my hometown of 1100 people would have news that would be featured on Fark.

I'm originally from Lake Jackson, which is much closer to Oyster Creek than Houston, and I was dismayed to find MY hometown featured in an article describing a woman killing her husband with an alcohol enema administered in sex play.

Oyster Creek is 59.6 miles from Houston and it takes one hour and eleven minutes if you consult Mapquest. So calling this "near Houston" is a stretch even if you are from TX.

Don't you know that anything that is closer to Houston than it is either Dallas, Austin, Galveston, or San Antonio is technically a part of Houston?


Pretty much this.
 
2009-12-18 05:41:03 PM
Scoop84: Well, we know it wasn't Chris Henry.

ouch.
 
2009-12-18 05:44:09 PM
Oyster Creek is 59.6 miles from Houston and it takes one hour and eleven minutes if you consult Mapquest. So calling this "near Houston" is a stretch even if you are from TX.

An hour outside of Houston is still part of the Houston area
 
2009-12-18 05:51:51 PM
Should've bought Lisa's rock!
 
2009-12-18 05:55:22 PM
thisguy369: No, I graduated from Brazosport in '05

That school had the neatest stuff going on when I went there, and the auditorium was the scene of some awesome memories. When I went there, the drama coach was getting it on with the orchestra teacher, the choir director brought his wife everyday, the Journalism teacher was a nudist, and a teacher gave my boyfriend the keys to the school for the senior prank. That place was a riot.
 
2009-12-18 06:27:15 PM
UHC2005: the money is in the banana stand: NannyStatePark: thisguy369: Wow.

This is amazing. I grew up in Oyster Creek and have been reading Fark for years. Never in my wildest dreams did I think my hometown of 1100 people would have news that would be featured on Fark.

I'm originally from Lake Jackson, which is much closer to Oyster Creek than Houston, and I was dismayed to find MY hometown featured in an article describing a woman killing her husband with an alcohol enema administered in sex play.

Oyster Creek is 59.6 miles from Houston and it takes one hour and eleven minutes if you consult Mapquest. So calling this "near Houston" is a stretch even if you are from TX.

Don't you know that anything that is closer to Houston than it is either Dallas, Austin, Galveston, or San Antonio is technically a part of Houston?

Pretty much this.


It is closer to Galveston than to Houston, but most people are more familiar with Houston than Galveston.
 
2009-12-18 06:27:42 PM
Livingstone: Er... I think I'd better come clean with you about this... it's... um it's not a virus, I'm afraid. You see, a virus is what we doctors call very very small. So small it could not possibly have made off with a whole leg. What we're looking for here is I think, and this is no more than an educated guess, I'd like to make that clear, is some multi-cellular life form with stripes, huge razor-sharp teeth, about eleven foot long and of the genus *felis horribilis*. What we doctors, in fact, call a tiger.
 
2009-12-18 06:32:55 PM
eat at the windswept restaurant in oyster creek on the way to or from surf fishing the cedars and you are a true southeast texan.
 
2009-12-18 06:48:50 PM
Crazy Joe Davola: FTFA: Rexses said the most recent sighting, bringing total reports to a handful, came just this morning.

Is that the official total? One handful?

/That's some fine reporting there, Lou


Dangit...came to grouse about this very thing.
 
2009-12-18 07:11:30 PM
JoeShow: Oyster Creek is 59.6 miles from Houston and it takes one hour and eleven minutes if you consult Mapquest. So calling this "near Houston" is a stretch even if you are from TX.

An hour outside of Houston is still part of the Houston area


Yup, down here right now. He's not kidding.

/Just visited the Alamo for the first time. woot.
 
2009-12-18 07:15:05 PM
i221.photobucket.com">
Thumbs up for subby!
 
2009-12-18 08:48:13 PM
*Brook
 
2009-12-18 09:52:13 PM
Punkindrublic: JoeShow: Oyster Creek is 59.6 miles from Houston and it takes one hour and eleven minutes if you consult Mapquest. So calling this "near Houston" is a stretch even if you are from TX.

An hour outside of Houston is still part of the Houston area

Yup, down here right now. He's not kidding.

/Just visited the Alamo for the first time. woot.


I guess "near" is a relative and subjective term. From a cultural standpoint, there was nothing metropolitan about the Brazosport area 17 years ago when I left. It was a big deal to drive to Houston for most people there when I was a kid, they don't even know how to drive properly on the freeways. They have a more pronounced accent. The area between HWY 288 and FM 2004 has huge expanses of practically unpopulated land. I guess I consider the "Houston area" to convey the impression of not seeing miles of practially nothing out of the car window while traveling through.

Maybe it's just my opinion, or things have changed alot, or you guys just weren't locals at some point? I dunno.
 
2009-12-18 11:07:57 PM
 
2009-12-19 12:52:55 AM
thumbnails.hulu.com

biatch
 
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