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(Fox News)   "Facts I Ought to Know about the Government of My Country" returned to library 99 years overdue. Fact #1: If you hold out long enough, you can get away with anything   (foxnews.com) divider line 42
    More: Obvious  
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6711 clicks; posted to Main » on 16 Dec 2009 at 2:44 AM (4 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



42 Comments   (+0 »)
   

Archived thread
 
2009-12-15 11:49:53 PM
Nowadays they'd just put a charge on your account. Those were the good old days when people were unaccountable to libraries and everyone was free to steal books whenever they wanted.
 
2009-12-15 11:53:23 PM
Whoever had it is probably piassed that there are more than 46 states.
 
2009-12-16 12:45:56 AM
Should have brought in this guy:

i711.photobucket.com

Well, let me tell you something, funny boy. Y'know that little stamp, the one that says "New York Public Library"? Well that may not mean anything to you, but that means a lot to me. One whole hell of a lot.

Sure, go ahead, laugh if you want to. I've seen your type before:

Flashy, making the scene, flaunting convention. Yeah, I know what you're thinking. What's this guy making such a big stink about old library books?

Well, let me give you a hint, junior. Maybe we can live without libraries, people like you and me. Maybe. Sure, we're too old to change the world, but what about that kid, sitting down, opening a book, right now, in a branch at the local library and finding drawings of pee-pees and wee-wees on the Cat in the Hat and the Five Chinese Brothers?

Doesn't HE deserve better? Look. If you think this is about overdue fines and missing books, you'd better think again.

This is about that kid's right to read a book without getting his mind warped! Or: maybe that turns you on, Seinfeld; maybe that's how y'get your kicks. You and your good-time buddies.

Well I got a flash for ya, joy-boy: Party time is over.
 
2009-12-16 01:06:27 AM
How it's typed: New Bedford
How it's said: "New Befa"
 
2009-12-16 02:47:01 AM
rackrent: Should have brought in this guy:



Well, let me tell you something, funny boy. Y'know that little stamp, the one that says "New York Public Library"? Well that may not mean anything to you, but that means a lot to me. One whole hell of a lot.

Sure, go ahead, laugh if you want to. I've seen your type before:

Flashy, making the scene, flaunting convention. Yeah, I know what you're thinking. What's this guy making such a big stink about old library books?

Well, let me give you a hint, junior. Maybe we can live without libraries, people like you and me. Maybe. Sure, we're too old to change the world, but what about that kid, sitting down, opening a book, right now, in a branch at the local library and finding drawings of pee-pees and wee-wees on the Cat in the Hat and the Five Chinese Brothers?

Doesn't HE deserve better? Look. If you think this is about overdue fines and missing books, you'd better think again.

This is about that kid's right to read a book without getting his mind warped! Or: maybe that turns you on, Seinfeld; maybe that's how y'get your kicks. You and your good-time buddies.

Well I got a flash for ya, joy-boy: Party time is over.


Came here for this, leaving MORE than satisfied.
I tip my hat to you!
 
2009-12-16 02:48:59 AM
99 years? A fine? No problem. Will you accept balloon payments?

// red ones?
 
2009-12-16 02:50:31 AM
1) We don't give a fark about you, we only want your money. Regardless of your color, religion, gender, or sexual orientation, we don't give a fark about you. We only want your money.

2) See Rule #1.
 
2009-12-16 02:54:48 AM
Prevent this kind of thing. Digitize all books and make them available online.
 
2009-12-16 02:55:42 AM
It would be interesting to compare and contrast the "common knowledge" of that time with today's. Anyone got a link / a .torrent for this book?
 
2009-12-16 02:57:08 AM
www.nerve.com
 
2009-12-16 03:05:37 AM
untaken_name: It would be interesting to compare and contrast the "common knowledge" of that time with today's. Anyone got a link / a .torrent for this book?

Are you that lazy? What is your problem? book in question (new window)
 
2009-12-16 03:10:31 AM
LIEBERMAAAANNNN!
 
2009-12-16 03:28:23 AM
Gosling: LIEBERMAAAANNNN!

elvis-pelt.com
Burn it with fire!
 
2009-12-16 03:33:39 AM
Fact #8: One day, every American will know someone with a telephone.

Fact #15: In America, children have the freedom to hold the same occupations their parents do.

Fact #21: The Indian race is grateful to the American government and its people for civilizing it.

Fact #27: The American woman has the greatest standard of living in the world. There is abundant firewood and coal to heat the stoves that cook meals and boil the water in which women wash their families' apparel. Most women even know how to read about who their husbands are voting for.

Fact #33: America is the world's leading tobacco grower, and smoking, chewing, and snorting tobacco has many well-known health benefits.

Fact #39: Providence has blessed Americas seas with an endless supply of whales whose oil keeps our lamps lit.

Fact #46: As long as proper regulations of their breeding and schooling are maintained, coloreds will never be President.

/dnrtfa
 
2009-12-16 03:36:22 AM
Panty Sniffer: untaken_name: It would be interesting to compare and contrast the "common knowledge" of that time with today's. Anyone got a link / a .torrent for this book?

Are you that lazy? What is your problem? book in question (new window)


Obviously. Worked, didn't it?
 
2009-12-16 03:37:45 AM
untaken_name: Panty Sniffer: untaken_name: It would be interesting to compare and contrast the "common knowledge" of that time with today's. Anyone got a link / a .torrent for this book?

Are you that lazy? What is your problem? book in question (new window)

Obviously. Worked, didn't it?


Actually, I don't honestly know if it worked or not. Too lazy to click the provided link.
 
2009-12-16 03:49:11 AM
The old "overdue library book found - guess how much was the fine!!" story.
The media trots out a version of this lame story, about every couple of months.
Nobody cares.
 
2009-12-16 03:52:10 AM
iamscotto: Fact #8: One day, every American will know someone with a telephone.

Fact #15: In America, children have the freedom to hold the same occupations their parents do.

Fact #21: The Indian race is grateful to the American government and its people for civilizing it.

Fact #27: The American woman has the greatest standard of living in the world. There is abundant firewood and coal to heat the stoves that cook meals and boil the water in which women wash their families' apparel. Most women even know how to read about who their husbands are voting for.

Fact #33: America is the world's leading tobacco grower, and smoking, chewing, and snorting tobacco has many well-known health benefits.

Fact #39: Providence has blessed Americas seas with an endless supply of whales whose oil keeps our lamps lit.

Fact #46: As long as proper regulations of their breeding and schooling are maintained, coloreds will never be President.

/dnrtfa


Stupendous. Just stupendous.
 
2009-12-16 04:19:49 AM
$10 bucks says the mother bought the book at a library sale 50 years ago and it was never "overdue" I bet almost all these "over due" library book stories are the same the book was purchased years before at a library sale that was forgotten about & never checked out or was overdue.

Except for Tropic of Cancer that book was overdue
 
2009-12-16 06:05:30 AM
Longer article Here (new window)

"The book, which was printed in 1894, includes some anachronisms, saying, for example, that US senators are picked by state Legislatures, instead of being elected by the people.

"All kinds of information in this book is wrong, but some is right, and it's interesting to see what people learned back then," Fulchino said."


I heard the story from this article last night. I thought it was strange that Fulchino seemed to be implying that the book was wrong at the time it was printed, but people learned that anyway.
 
2009-12-16 06:10:10 AM
"If you hold out long enough, you can get away with anything"

www.mtholyoke.edu

Agrees.
 
2009-12-16 06:38:39 AM
KOOLmike: 1) We don't give a fark about you, we only want your money. Regardless of your color, religion, gender, or sexual orientation, we don't give a fark about you. We only want your money.

2) See Rule #1.


Except that they didn't want his money...

FTA: "The overdue book fine was a penny a day in 1910. But Dudek wasn't asked to pay it."
 
2009-12-16 08:23:17 AM
"...returned to library 99 years overdue."

All right, library, you won this round but the fight's not over yet!
 
2009-12-16 08:54:15 AM
This dude has been busy this past week:
www.tebeosfera.com
 
2009-12-16 08:59:55 AM
Gecko5: Longer article Here (new window)

"The book, which was printed in 1894, includes some anachronisms, saying, for example, that US senators are picked by state Legislatures, instead of being elected by the people.

"All kinds of information in this book is wrong, but some is right, and it's interesting to see what people learned back then," Fulchino said."

I heard the story from this article last night. I thought it was strange that Fulchino seemed to be implying that the book was wrong at the time it was printed, but people learned that anyway.


The author of the book would be ashamed at the state of our nation's public library directors a hundred years in the future.

This guy probably makes over a 100k a year on the commonwealth's dime and can't be bothered to digg a little into history before making asinine statements to the media.

"Man.. people back then were MORANS! lol"
 
2009-12-16 09:25:29 AM
I recently found a overdue library book from 1979 in a box of stuff from my mom's house. I'm gonna wait another 30 years or so before I return it.

/biography of Karl Marx
//high school assignment
 
2009-12-16 09:29:27 AM
Wow, a story about New Beige that involved library books instead of shootings and it made the front page on Fark? I'm stunned.
 
2009-12-16 09:33:39 AM
Not surprised. It's New Bedford.
 
2009-12-16 09:54:19 AM
Great headline, Subby.

+1
 
2009-12-16 10:25:06 AM
So New Bedford, Dartmouth and Taunton have all been featured on Fark in the past few days... I'm having no trouble finding out which Farkers are from here now!

\Dartmouth/Fall River here
 
2009-12-16 10:32:22 AM
Full text of said book is on Google Books. Somehow Bing search wasn't able to find it; just page after page of "99 years overdue" stories.
 
2009-12-16 10:37:58 AM
LastTrueViking: iamscotto: Fact #8: One day, every American will know someone with a telephone.

Fact #15: In America, children have the freedom to hold the same occupations their parents do.

Fact #21: The Indian race is grateful to the American government and its people for civilizing it.

Fact #27: The American woman has the greatest standard of living in the world. There is abundant firewood and coal to heat the stoves that cook meals and boil the water in which women wash their families' apparel. Most women even know how to read about who their husbands are voting for.

Fact #33: America is the world's leading tobacco grower, and smoking, chewing, and snorting tobacco has many well-known health benefits.

Fact #39: Providence has blessed Americas seas with an endless supply of whales whose oil keeps our lamps lit.

Fact #46: As long as proper regulations of their breeding and schooling are maintained, coloreds will never be President.

/dnrtfa

Stupendous. Just stupendous.



Wrong. It is completely offensive to anyone with a modicum of decency. The stoves at the time didn't use coal AND firewood. Morans.
 
2009-12-16 12:29:17 PM
Roman Polanski has recently learned he didn't hold out long enough.
 
2009-12-16 12:32:26 PM
Begoggle
The old "overdue library book found - guess how much was the fine!!" story.
The media trots out a version of this lame story, about every couple of months.
Nobody cares.


Here is the lit of other stories we don't care about.

# Jan. 1: First baby of year
# Feb. 2: Punxatawney Phil
# First Friday of Lent: Fish Fry Fundraisers
# Apr. 15: Last-minute income tax filers
# Jun. 1: Pools are opening!
# Late June: Fireworks safety tips
# Aug. 15: Pools are closing!
# Aug. 16: Back-to-school shopping!
# Aug. 20: Kids back in school!
# Oct. 31: Halloween costumes!
# November/December: Good God! It Snows Here!
# Txgiving: Homeless get turkey dinner
# Day after Txgiving: People shopping!
# Gold coin dropped in Salvation Army bucket
# Xmas: People having shiatty Christmas
# Day after Xmas: Bargains and gift cards
# Dec. 31: New Year Resolutions: Dieting
 
2009-12-16 12:34:03 PM
Kind of a boring book. Dwells a lot on that Constitution thingy.
 
2009-12-16 12:35:40 PM
subby: If you hold out long enough, you can get away with anything.

www.topnews.in

Agrees.

/Wait, what?
 
2009-12-16 12:36:23 PM
Damn you, spindle.

[shakes tiny fist]
 
2009-12-16 01:07:37 PM
Subby Fact #1: If you hold out long enough, you can get away with anything

DISAGREES
therealrevo.com
 
2009-12-16 01:09:25 PM
Gecko5: I thought it was strange that Fulchino seemed to be implying that the book was wrong at the time it was printed, but people learned that anyway.

Librarians are not exactly known for their, uh, knowledge. I'm guessing Fulchino was not familiar with the 17th Amendment.
 
2009-12-16 02:21:16 PM
Is there a new version of this book?

I think a true version would be in violation of the 'patriot act' or some such thing..

/land of the free!
 
2009-12-17 05:03:17 AM
The Life Of Brian: Is there a new version of this book?

I think a true version would be in violation of the 'patriot act' or some such thing..

/land of the free!


They can't make a new one. Even possession of the old one gets you put on a watch list as a "domestic terrorist" because it talks about the Constitution, which the government has declared that only terrorists do.

/oops, now I guess I'm a terrorist, too.
 
2009-12-17 09:44:28 AM
what s ths constitution the book keeps refering to?
 
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