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(WTOP) Amusing Shelbyville woman arrested for riding horse in Christmas parade while drunk. Duff cans have not been located   (wtopnews.com) divider line 43
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3507 clicks; posted to Main » on 11 Dec 2009 at 7:49 AM   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»   |    Get this fabulous T-Shirt and impress the methane out of your friends! shirt it!



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2009-12-11 03:46:18 AM
Maybe that's because they sell Fudd beer in Shelbyville, Subby. That, and the fact that they marry their cousins...
 
2009-12-11 04:19:16 AM
It's funny because the town name is the same as a fictional one from an animated series!

i50.tinypic.com
 
2009-12-11 04:36:38 AM
Schadenfreude ist die schoenste Freude: I have a sudden urge to do this...

i295.photobucket.comi50.tinypic.com

i295.photobucket.comi50.tinypic.com

i295.photobucket.comi50.tinypic.com

cache.thephoenix.com

/here's hoping the hotlink don't fail...
 
2009-12-11 04:44:57 AM
johnsoninca: Maybe that's because they sell Fudd beer in Shelbyville, Subby.

Didn't some rednecks go blind from drinking that, Homer?
 
2009-12-11 06:02:08 AM
Family Guy in my Simpsons thread? Say it isn't so!
 
2009-12-11 07:51:38 AM
WTF? Is this WTOP day today or something?
 
2009-12-11 07:55:26 AM
johnsoninca: Maybe that's because they sell Fudd beer in Shelbyville, Subby. That, and the fact that they marry their cousins...

We liters always get scooped on the best jokes.

Wait, that was in "Colonel Homer", wasn't it? If I recall, he drove quite a while to get out in the sticks and Shelbyville is right next door to Springfield. Did the ep otherwise indicate that he was still in Shelbyville?
 
2009-12-11 07:58:16 AM
Oh god, it must be hell living there with all the retards visiting and cracking one liners and quotes.
 
2009-12-11 08:02:36 AM
Satan_Himself: johnsoninca: Maybe that's because they sell Fudd beer in Shelbyville, Subby. That, and the fact that they marry their cousins...

We liters always get scooped on the best jokes.

Wait, that was in "Colonel Homer", wasn't it? If I recall, he drove quite a while to get out in the sticks and Shelbyville is right next door to Springfield. Did the ep otherwise indicate that he was still in Shelbyville?


And you call yourself a Simpsons fan (maybe). The episode where Fudd is first mentioned is in fact "Colonel Homer". However, Homer does not go to Shelbeyville. He goes upstate, to Spittle County, which is where the Beer N' Brawl is located. We don't learn that they sell Fudd, not Duff, in Shelbeyville until "Lemon of Troy".

/crying bitter, bitter tears that I know all of this all too well
 
2009-12-11 08:05:18 AM
This joke was better in 1992.
 
2009-12-11 08:07:16 AM
What no Charles and Camilla jokes?
 
2009-12-11 08:14:37 AM
www.guarna.net
Duffman's day has come
 
2009-12-11 08:22:22 AM
Thats a thumbs up for a good night.
 
2009-12-11 08:26:41 AM
Officers said they had to catch her twice to keep her from falling.

My question is why did they put her back up after the first one?
 
2009-12-11 08:38:24 AM
nag, nag, nag...
 
2009-12-11 08:38:38 AM
ghare: WTF? Is this WTOP day today or something?

New sponsor?
 
2009-12-11 08:43:46 AM
Republic. I like the sound of the word. It means people can live free, talk free, go or come, buy or sell, be drunk or sober, however they choose. Some words give you a feeling. Republic is one of those words that makes me tight in the throat - the same tightness a man gets when his baby takes his first step or his first baby shaves and makes his first sound as a man. Some words can give you a feeling that makes your heart warm. Republic is one of those words.

John Wayne as Davey Crockett in "The Alamo"

/if they'd won, you'd be able to fall drunk off a horse and NOT get arrested.
//Remembers "The Alamo"
 
2009-12-11 08:51:18 AM
OH YEAH!
 
2009-12-11 08:54:56 AM
fish500: OH YEAH!

What does the Cool-Aid guy have to do with this?
 
2009-12-11 09:07:46 AM
Haha... I was just down in Shelbyville a few weeks ago for a Clinton Anderson clinic. Was expecting it to be one-light village with dirt roads, but surprisingly, it wasn't.
 
2009-12-11 09:09:57 AM
coco ebert: Family Guy in my Simpsons thread? Say it isn't so!

I know. It should be grounds for bannination.
 
2009-12-11 09:13:40 AM
www.twoguysaroundtheworld.com

Last seen fleeing the scene.
 
B A [TotalFark]
2009-12-11 09:17:15 AM
Crunch61: Republic. I like the sound of the word. It means people can live free, talk free, go or come, buy or sell, be drunk or sober, however they choose. Some words give you a feeling. Republic is one of those words that makes me tight in the throat - the same tightness a man gets when his baby takes his first step or his first baby shaves and makes his first sound as a man. Some words can give you a feeling that makes your heart warm. Republic is one of those words.

John Wayne as Davey Crockett in "The Alamo"

/if they'd won, you'd be able to fall drunk off a horse and NOT get arrested.
//Remembers "The Alamo"


At least they didn't charge her with DUI!
SYLVANIA, Ala. - A woman who went for a horseback ride through town at midnight and allegedly used the horse to ram a police car was charged with driving under the influence and drug offenses, police said Tuesday.

"Cars were passing by having to avoid it, and almost hitting the horse," said Police Chief Brad Gregg.

He said DUI charges can apply even when the vehicle has four legs instead of wheels.
Link (new window)
DUI on Horse
Georgia DUI on Horse
Woman Accused of Drunk Driving a Horse Clayton, Georgia applies DUI statute to a woman riding a horse.

The Georgia State Patrol has charged Heather Darnell, 22, with the crime of driving a horse under the influence. Last Friday at 10:30pm a 1993 Pontiac Bonneville struck Darnell's horse on US 441 near Steoka Falls and Bethel Roads in the city of Clayton as Darnell attempted to cross the road.

Police claim she was drunk at the time.

Darnell was rushed by a Lifeflight helicopter to Gwinett Medical Center for urgent treatment.

Passengers in the Bonneville suffered less serious injuries. The horse is believed to have survived the incident.

Darnell now faces up to a year in prison, fines of $1000 plus court costs, 40 hours of community service, and a one-year automobile license suspension.

Georgia Drunk Driving Statute 40-6-391. (a) A person shall not drive or be in actual physical control of any moving vehicle while: (1) Under the influence of alcohol to the extent that it is less safe for the person to drive.

Source: Link (new window)

more:
Police Arrest Man on Tricycle for Oregon DUI
A man on a tricycle was arrested by the Oregon State Police and charged with Oregon DUI on October 3. Police say that the man was cautioned and then later spotted riding the adult-sized tricycle on a public road. State Trooper Dave Timm told KTVL News that he contacted a group of intoxicated people at Tenmile Lakes County Park at approximately 2 p.m. At that time, William David Bjorkquist, 58, reportedly told Timm that he was going to ride the tricycle home. Timm says that he warned Bjorkquist not to ride the tricycle because he was intoxicated. Bjorkquist reportedly agreed not to ride and said that his friends would help him push the tricycle home. A little while later, Timm saw Bjorkquist riding the tricycle in a traffic lane on the wrong side of the road. Bjorkquist reportedly rolled through a stop sign and then continued down the wrong side of another street. Timm stopped Bjorkquist, who reportedly still showed obvious signs of impairment. Bjorkquist reportedly failed field sobriety tests and was arrested for Oregon DUI.
Insult to Injury Horse DUI
A man in New South Wales was arrested for DUI after falling off of a horse without losing the grip on his bottle of bourbon. News.com.au reported that police had received complaints from motorists about a man who appeared to be drunk while riding his horse down the road. The rider was reportedly drinking from his bottle of bourbon and yelling at motorists as he failed to yield to the right of way and let go of the horse's reins. Police arrived, located the man and his horse, and arrested him for DUI. The horse was picked up by the man's partner and taken to safety.

DUI after Falling Off a Bicycle
A man from Macon, Georgia was charged with Georgia DUI after police noticed him weaving as he pedaled a 5-speed boys' bicycle on a public road. Macon.com reported that an officer was dispatched to the area after reports about a person who had fallen off of a bicycle. The officer noticed Cliffton Taylor III weaving from side to side on the bike before he fell off and hit the ground. The officer smelled alcohol on Taylor's breath and clothes, and reportedly noticed that his eyes were bloodshot. Since bicycle riders in Georgia are subject to the same alcohol laws as drivers, Taylor was given a field sobriety test and when he failed, was placed under arrest for Georgia DUI. Taylor's blood alcohol content was reportedly .3 percent.

Amish Buggy DUI
The Standard Journal has reported a most unusual DUI. According to the report, Steven David Hostetler was arrested for DUI in Watsontown, Pennsylvania while allegedly driving an Amish buggy while intoxicated. Hostetler was reportedly driving his horse-drawn buggy down the road with no visible lights when he was stopped by police. When the cops asked him if he was Amish, he reportedly told them that he is a "bad Amish." He explained to police that he had left the religious sect but later returned. He had driven his buggy to the Watsontown carnival earlier in the evening and later drank about 12 beers before attempting to drive his buggy home. Hostetler reportedly failed a field sobriety test and was arrested for Pennsylvania DUI.

Link (new window)
Apparently our lawmakers are trying to re-pass a form of prohibition.
 
2009-12-11 09:17:26 AM
farkin_Gary: nag, nag, nag...

I think I see what you did there...
 
2009-12-11 09:19:19 AM
Sam The Sham And The Pharaohs would like a word with her.
 
2009-12-11 09:19:56 AM
 
2009-12-11 09:43:06 AM
Sara Jessica Parker gives coat to homeless woman.
 
2009-12-11 09:44:27 AM
This is hilarious. I was actually at this parade and tried to help get her off the horse before she fell off and cracked her head, but some guy next to her pulled her horse away.
 
2009-12-11 09:49:00 AM
www.funbumperstickers.com

FTFA: ... a charge of public intoxication after police said she passed out on a horse she rode in the Shelbyville Christmas parade.

You gotta be fairly s**t faced to fall off a horse, just sayin.

Marla Singer's Laundry


Would it KILL you guys to learn to use a hosting site? FFS.

Heh, I use both. The link is hot gag is kinda played though.
 
2009-12-11 09:51:12 AM
Sounds to me like Shelbyville's got a discipline problem!
 
2009-12-11 09:53:04 AM
i always thought that the term was falling off the wagon.

/shes doing it wrong
 
2009-12-11 10:37:40 AM
The Dreaded Rear Admiral: Satan_Himself: johnsoninca: Maybe that's because they sell Fudd beer in Shelbyville, Subby. That, and the fact that they marry their cousins...

We liters always get scooped on the best jokes.

Wait, that was in "Colonel Homer", wasn't it? If I recall, he drove quite a while to get out in the sticks and Shelbyville is right next door to Springfield. Did the ep otherwise indicate that he was still in Shelbyville?

And you call yourself a Simpsons fan (maybe). The episode where Fudd is first mentioned is in fact "Colonel Homer". However, Homer does not go to Shelbeyville. He goes upstate, to Spittle County, which is where the Beer N' Brawl is located. We don't learn that they sell Fudd, not Duff, in Shelbeyville until "Lemon of Troy".

/crying bitter, bitter tears that I know all of this all too well


Ah, loneliness and cheeseburgers are a dangerous mix!
 
2009-12-11 10:44:49 AM
So if you had a friend named Jack, and he was stuck on the horse in this same predicament, would you help Jack...er, nevermind.
 
2009-12-11 11:03:18 AM
Crunch61: Republic. I like the sound of the word. It means people can live free, talk free, go or come, buy or sell, be drunk or sober, however they choose. Some words give you a feeling. Republic is one of those words that makes me tight in the throat - the same tightness a man gets when his baby takes his first step or his first baby shaves and makes his first sound as a man. Some words can give you a feeling that makes your heart warm. Republic is one of those words.

John Wayne as Davey Crockett in "The Alamo"

/if they'd won, you'd be able to fall drunk off a horse and NOT get arrested.
//Remembers "The Alamo"


Alamo Beer?

www.max-download.com
 
2009-12-11 11:17:12 AM
*hoot*
*hoot*
*hoot*
 
2009-12-11 11:40:03 AM
With picture of what a candy cane may look like.

www.wtopnews.com
 
2009-12-11 01:02:18 PM
digilander.libero.it

Somewhere Lee Marvin is smiling.
 
2009-12-11 01:07:54 PM
Page B: fish500: OH YEAH!

What does the Cool-Aid guy have to do with this?


Kool-Aid.
Dammit.
 
2009-12-11 01:08:14 PM
We were just getting over the Cheetos episode. And THIS brings attention right back to us...
 
2009-12-11 01:31:23 PM
I watched this go down when a media buddy of mine listening in on the police scanner told me where the bust was going to happen.

Link (new window)
November 15, 2009
Man in Cambridge Santa Claus parade charged with drunk driving

CAMBRIDGE - A 51-year-old Cambridge man faces charges of impaired driving after he was arrested while driving a vehicle in the city's Santa Claus parade Saturday night.

Waterloo Regional Police arrested the man just before 7 p.m. after being tipped off that a driver participating in the parade may have been drinking, said Sgt. Grant Rieder.

Two occupants in the vehicle were charged with public intoxication.
 
2009-12-11 01:42:26 PM
Crunch61:

/if they'd won, you'd be able to fall drunk off a horse and NOT get arrested.
//Remembers "The Alamo"


So you're blaming the Mexicans?
 
2009-12-11 06:33:06 PM
It's not 'Shelbyville'.

It's 'Shebbavull.'

Right down the road from Bell Buckle, and a few miles west of Wartrace. Great place if you love horses.
 
2009-12-12 02:44:57 AM
Yes yes, but was she wearing an onion on her belt? Because that was the style at the time.
 
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