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(My Fox DC) Dumbass No matter what they tell you in El Salvador, stuffing cocaine into a fully cooked chicken and carrying it with you off of the plane is not the best way to smuggle drugs into the US   (myfoxdc.com) divider line 57
More: Dumbass, El Salvador, planes  
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3241 clicks; posted to Main » on 04 Dec 2009 at 2:44 PM   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»   |    Get this fabulous T-Shirt and impress the methane out of your friends! shirt it!



57 Comments   (+0 »)
   

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Pocket Ninja [TotalFark]
2009-12-04 11:02:08 AM
You know, I was just thinking about this the other day. Well, not chickens, but steak. Would there be a way to inject cocaine, maybe in a liquified form or something, into raw steak? Then transport the steak like you're some meat transporter, cross the border, and then extract the liquified cocaine from the steaks? And still eat the steak? I mean, I guess you could sacrifice the steak if you had to, but it would be a shame. I'm pretty sure that the injecting part would work, but I guess it would take a lot of steaks to really transport a marketable quantity. Or big ones. T-bones or something. How much could you get into one steak? I'm not sure about that. As far as transporting, if dogs started hitting on the van, you could just say, "it's full of steak." And the officers would be like, "wow, that's a lot of steak." And then they'd let you through. It all works, I just can't figure out the extraction. Maybe you could invent a market for cocaine steak. Do you have to snort it? Would you get the same high from eating the liquid cocaine that was injected into the steak? I need to figure this out.
 
Diogenes [TotalFark]
2009-12-04 01:38:08 PM
It's much better in the chicken. When I have extra coke that can't fit in the bird, it never turns out the same as coke soaking up all those juices.
 
schattenteufel
2009-12-04 02:49:42 PM
www.chewednews.com
does not approve.
 
myinternetname
2009-12-04 02:51:21 PM
Misleading words are misleading!


First line says the chicken was stuffed and I was like


MMMMM COCAINE CHICKEN....

then they reveal it was in little baggies. The flavor doesn't soak into the meat like that *angry face*
 
Diogenes [TotalFark]
2009-12-04 02:52:49 PM
myinternetname: Misleading words are misleading!


First line says the chicken was stuffed and I was like


MMMMM COCAINE CHICKEN....

then they reveal it was in little baggies. The flavor doesn't soak into the meat like that *angry face*

I know. It's like people who forget to take the giblets out of the little bag. Heathens.
 
sboyle1020
2009-12-04 02:54:00 PM
Just curious, at what point does it become a felony drug charge? $4,000 doesn't seem like that much.
 
highrye
2009-12-04 02:54:55 PM
I tried to eat steak with cocaine on it, as a joke, a couple of years past. It was a very bad idea. It tasted horrible, not too mention my tongue went numb and I couldn't tell if I was chewing my tongue or the steak. You can eat it though, it is just a huge waste.
 
FeFiFoFark
2009-12-04 02:55:35 PM
Q: Do you know what I hate more FOX?


.


.


.


A: nothing
 
LeroyBourne
2009-12-04 02:56:37 PM
Call me old fashioned but wouldn't it be easier to find some drugged out crack jobs, hire them as drug mules, and stuff balloon loads of coke up their asses?
 
FeFiFoFark
2009-12-04 02:56:47 PM
more than FOX


fail. nevermind.
 
highrye
2009-12-04 02:56:56 PM
Not to mention I should learn how to proofread. øøps. The drugs, they damaged my brain.
 
sboyle1020
2009-12-04 02:57:08 PM
FeFiFoFark: Q: Do you know what I hate more FOX?


.


.


.


A: nothing

Fail.
 
litespeed74
2009-12-04 02:57:52 PM
A chicken stuffed with cocaine?
Are they describing Amy Winehouse?
 
A-Rth-Urp-Hil-Ipdenu
2009-12-04 02:58:16 PM
Pollo Campero, MS-13 style?
 
turbopro
2009-12-04 02:58:46 PM
Pocket Ninja: You know, I was just thinking about this the other day. Well, not chickens, but steak. Would there be a way to inject cocaine, maybe in a liquified form or something, into raw steak? Then transport the steak like you're some meat transporter, cross the border, and then extract the liquified cocaine from the steaks? And still eat the steak? I mean, I guess you could sacrifice the steak if you had to, but it would be a shame. I'm pretty sure that the injecting part would work, but I guess it would take a lot of steaks to really transport a marketable quantity. Or big ones. T-bones or something. How much could you get into one steak? I'm not sure about that. As far as transporting, if dogs started hitting on the van, you could just say, "it's full of steak." And the officers would be like, "wow, that's a lot of steak." And then they'd let you through. It all works, I just can't figure out the extraction. Maybe you could invent a market for cocaine steak. Do you have to snort it? Would you get the same high from eating the liquid cocaine that was injected into the steak? I need to figure this out.

I think it would be easier to incorporate it into ground beef. Think about it. It's easier to add yayo to it during the grinding process. The expression did you put crack in that would have a whole new literal meaning.
 
FeFiFoFark
2009-12-04 02:59:09 PM
sboyle1020: FeFiFoFark: Q: Do you know what I hate more FOX?


A: nothing

Fail.

refresh much?
 
phlegmmo [TotalFark]
2009-12-04 02:59:11 PM
It's amazing he even thought he could pullet off.
 
HowieFeltursnatch
2009-12-04 02:59:42 PM
sboyle1020: Just curious, at what point does it become a felony drug charge? $4,000 doesn't seem like that much.

My thoughts exactly. Slap him with a fine and move on.
 
AnubisMan
2009-12-04 02:59:44 PM
LeroyBourne: Call me old fashioned but wouldn't it be easier to find some drugged out crack jobs, hire them as drug mules, and stuff balloon loads of coke up their asses?

That's the prefered method, but you are always going to have your inventive types that try and think outside the box that are trying new things out there.
 
tortilla burger
2009-12-04 03:00:11 PM
This is a crime most fowl
 
Diogenes [TotalFark]
2009-12-04 03:00:14 PM
LeroyBourne: Call me old fashioned but wouldn't it be easier to find some drugged out crack jobs, hire them as drug mules, and stuff balloon loads of coke up their asses?

Chickens don't pinch the bags. No thumbs.
 
Mr. Potatoass
2009-12-04 03:00:22 PM
That would make a great fast food franchise.
"Here at El Pollo Llello, the line at the counter waits for you."
 
sboyle1020
2009-12-04 03:00:49 PM
FeFiFoFark: sboyle1020: FeFiFoFark: Q: Do you know what I hate more FOX?


A: nothing

Fail.

refresh much?

It was 21 seconds, bro. And don't cop a tude because you're an idiot.
 
Killer Cars
2009-12-04 03:01:06 PM
ecx.images-amazon.com

This man went down there to uncover the whole cocaine-in-chicken issue several years ago. Unfortunately, some pissy little military dictatorship got in his way.
 
Dances-With-Lobster
2009-12-04 03:02:42 PM
Chicken Cordon Blow?
 
FeFiFoFark
2009-12-04 03:03:05 PM
sboyle1020
And don't cop a tude because you're an idiot.

Idiocy loves company, bro.
 
phlegmmo [TotalFark]
2009-12-04 03:03:48 PM
Pocket Ninja: Would there be a way to inject cocaine, maybe in a liquified form or something, into raw steak?

Bovine + coke => blowvine. Ask for it by name.
 
cleveoh
2009-12-04 03:04:06 PM
bwack bwack bwack,
bwack bwack bwack,
bwack bwack bwaaaaaaaack,

Cocaine.
 
tbyte
2009-12-04 03:04:55 PM
turbopro: Pocket Ninja: You know, I was just thinking about this the other day. Well, not chickens, but steak. Would there be a way to inject cocaine, maybe in a liquified form or something, into raw steak? Then transport the steak like you're some meat transporter, cross the border, and then extract the liquified cocaine from the steaks? And still eat the steak? I mean, I guess you could sacrifice the steak if you had to, but it would be a shame. I'm pretty sure that the injecting part would work, but I guess it would take a lot of steaks to really transport a marketable quantity. Or big ones. T-bones or something. How much could you get into one steak? I'm not sure about that. As far as transporting, if dogs started hitting on the van, you could just say, "it's full of steak." And the officers would be like, "wow, that's a lot of steak." And then they'd let you through. It all works, I just can't figure out the extraction. Maybe you could invent a market for cocaine steak. Do you have to snort it? Would you get the same high from eating the liquid cocaine that was injected into the steak? I need to figure this out.

I think it would be easier to incorporate it into ground beef. Think about it. It's easier to add yayo to it during the grinding process. The expression did you put crack in that would have a whole new literal meaning.

Wait, what was the old meaning of that expression??
 
offacue
2009-12-04 03:05:10 PM
Why did the chicken cross the border?
 
sboyle1020
2009-12-04 03:05:34 PM
Killer Cars: This man went down there to uncover the whole cocaine-in-chicken issue several years ago. Unfortunately, some pissy little military dictatorship got in his way.

Nah, I think he was distracted by pieces of candy.
 
Sefton
2009-12-04 03:05:36 PM
Finger lickin' good.


/ann now my tumms aww nummm.
 
Bodine Wilson
2009-12-04 03:05:51 PM
AnubisMan: LeroyBourne: Call me old fashioned but wouldn't it be easier to find some drugged out crack jobs, hire them as drug mules, and stuff balloon loads of coke up their asses?

That's the prefered method, but you are always going to have your inventive types that try and think outside the box that are trying new things out there.

The preferred method is to stuff an intermodal shipping container with 10 tons of it, and then let some shlub get caught elsewhere with a few ounces in a chicken so customs can pretend they are doing something.
 
Sefton
2009-12-04 03:07:17 PM
offacue: Why did the chicken cross the border?

To get the cocaine to the other side.
 
phlegmmo [TotalFark]
2009-12-04 03:08:41 PM
...stuffing cocaine into a fully cooked chicken...

"Sounds delicious, Fred."
www.pollsb.com
 
mandingueiro
2009-12-04 03:11:10 PM
Killer Cars: This man went down there to uncover the whole cocaine-in-chicken issue several years ago. Unfortunately, some pissy little military dictatorship got in his way.

that was nothing but a US sponsored/trained government trained to suppress the 'socialist domino effect'.

/off to the politics tab
//not really
///a cool pillow is better than any political discussion
 
medius [TotalFark]
2009-12-04 03:11:46 PM
"I'm not very hungry, but I'll take seconds of the stuffing, please."
 
66dude
2009-12-04 03:12:03 PM
I wonder if he licked the chicken...
 
Thisbymaster
2009-12-04 03:12:49 PM
www.orlandosentinel.com
Some ask why? I think why not?
 
Mental_Knife
2009-12-04 03:13:26 PM
In PMITA prison, the cock stuffs YOU, Mr. Guatemalan cock stuffer.
 
mandingueiro
2009-12-04 03:16:14 PM
Killer Cars: This man went down there to uncover the whole cocaine-in-chicken issue several years ago. Unfortunately, some pissy little military dictatorship got in his way.

although i appreciate the reference (its a great flick): f*ck you. dickwad.
 
carrion_luggage
2009-12-04 03:22:44 PM
How else are you supposed to make coke au vin?
 
DirkValentine
2009-12-04 03:35:28 PM
Pocket Ninja: You know, I was just thinking about this the other day. Well, not chickens, but steak. Would there be a way to inject cocaine, maybe in a liquified form or something, into raw steak? Then transport the steak like you're some meat transporter, cross the border, and then extract the liquified cocaine from the steaks? And still eat the steak? I mean, I guess you could sacrifice the steak if you had to, but it would be a shame. I'm pretty sure that the injecting part would work, but I guess it would take a lot of steaks to really transport a marketable quantity. Or big ones. T-bones or something. How much could you get into one steak? I'm not sure about that. As far as transporting, if dogs started hitting on the van, you could just say, "it's full of steak." And the officers would be like, "wow, that's a lot of steak." And then they'd let you through. It all works, I just can't figure out the extraction. Maybe you could invent a market for cocaine steak. Do you have to snort it? Would you get the same high from eating the liquid cocaine that was injected into the steak? I need to figure this out.

I'm thinking that you would have a hard time extracting it. It is, chemically speaking, a salt.

Also, yes, you would definitely get high by ingesting it orally. Sometimes i put it in my beer.
 
Rodent of unusual size
2009-12-04 03:36:37 PM
Why was this man allowed on the plane. Everybody know chickens can't fly.
 
Rodent of unusual size
2009-12-04 03:37:21 PM
Rodent of unusual size
Why was this man allowed on the plane. Everybody knows chickens can't fly

ftfm
 
fappomatic
2009-12-04 03:37:21 PM
How about mold it into kids' halloween masks and swords & stuff? Better yet...put it in a balloon and stuff it up yer prison purse and walk right on through!!
 
kindms
2009-12-04 04:15:00 PM
simple possession of cocaine is a felony. Now it is certainly pleaded down and out from time to time but is a felony charge.
 
MBooda
2009-12-04 04:24:07 PM
Cocaine in a chicken...

...which came first?
 
studebaker hoch
2009-12-04 04:32:25 PM
She was making chicken ala crack.
 
studebaker hoch
2009-12-04 04:34:52 PM
highrye

I tried to eat steak with cocaine on it, as a joke, a couple of years past. It was a very bad idea. It tasted horrible, not too mention my tongue went numb and I couldn't tell if I was chewing my tongue or the steak. You can eat it though, it is just a huge waste.

[VADER ON]
The story is cool with this bro.
[VADER OFF]
 
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