photo caption: This undated photo provided by the Clayton County Sheriff's Office shows William C. Caldwell III.

they must not like you very much

Meth is a hell of a drug.

a story so nice they told it twice

Dammit, that guy is giving Treys a bad name.

It's IN there

Will Ferrell did it better.

(Clayton County needs its own FARK tag)

AbbeySomeone: Why would a 45 year old man want his picture taken with Santa?

Because, as a previous poster said, meth is a helluva drug?

AbbeySomeone: Why would a 45 year old man want his picture taken with Santa?

The Angry Hand of God
Meth is a hell of a drug. Enough Said.

He waited his turn in line. That's awesome.

I'm picturing the assorted parents also waiting in line, looking at this guy and apparently not one of them had the nerve to question him before his turn.

meunke you beat me to it.

jeepers creepers look at those peepers!

He'll make the Georgia Registry of Sexual Offenders for the dressing up and because a lap may have been involved.

I disagree with subby. I think that dude looks exactly like an elf. He looks small and the weirdly bulging eyes kinda make it work.

I was thinking Sexual Offdner list, but he's gonna get added to the No fly list now.

They don't look like these either, but we can hope:




/hot .. like chocolate

AbbeySomeone: friedlinx: AbbeySomeone: Why would a 45 year old man want his picture taken with Santa?

The Angry Hand of God
Meth is a hell of a drug. Enough Said.

Too simple. I like the idea of twisted sexual fantasies or childhood trauma.

William C. Caldwell I and William C. Caldwell II wanted for questioning.

Approves

improvius: Candy cane goes where?

awesome!

...and to think, it hasn't even been five years yet. (new window)

OMG - As someone that lived in Morrow, GA for 27+ years and saw Southlake mall being built, I am getting a kick out of this replies......

/// Lived at the "Goldmine" arcade during my wasted days of youth
//// Southlake mall is a shAthole now.
// Get the hell of my lawn.

Wasn't he married to Drew Barrymore?

Hobbit, most likely.

Dynamite? Why not the usual chainsaw and boom stick?

Too early to call this guy our new Tribbett?

//Will be watching this guy's police blotter very closely.

Christmas 2009. The year I hoped I would finally get my detonators from Santa. I spent all November dropping hints to the old man and mom but they just didn't get it.

Crazy Elf: Mom, if I got some detonators, I betcha I could blow up that abortion clinic down the street!

Crazy Elf's Mom: Oh dearie. Just leave that to the drunken church rabble. It's their fight. Now, how would you like Santa to bring you a nice .410 shotgun for Christmas. If you got those detonators, you'd just blow your eyes out.

Crazy Elf: He brought me a .410 last year and the police took it away from me.

I even tried to work my teacher by writing the bestest essay about how detonators are the best gift and I would be so careful with them. But try as I might, I couldn't sway the liberal old hag.

Teacher: Crazy Elf, your essay was full of extreme right wing ants and your detailed plan to blow up the international banking consortium is horribly flawed. I'm giving you a C+. Also, you'll blow your eyes out.

In desperation, I went to see Santa. I knew that if I showed him the dynamite I had made from various chemicals and gun powder, he would see that I was sincere and desperately needed those detonators. I waited in line behind some goofy kid who kept talking about asking Santa for Pinnacle Chip based computer. Stupid Dexter. Finally! I made it to the Jolly Old Saint's lap. But I froze! Santa was impatient. "What do you want? Aren't you a little old to be here, kid?" Hands grabbed me and started to direct me to the slide. It was now or never! I blurted it out just as quickly as I could:

Crazy Elf: I have dynamite in my bag! I need detonators to return the United States to the Jesus centric nation is should forever be!

Santa: Mall Security! By the way kid, You'll only blow your eyes out (pushes crazy elf down the slide).

That's a serious case of crazy eyes.

Andy Dick, you're falling apart.

fatal_exception: He waited his turn in line. That's awesome.

I'm picturing the assorted parents also waiting in line, looking at this guy and apparently not one of them had the nerve to question him before his turn.

He waited in line because he didn't actually have dynamite. Taking cuts in front of a bunch of kids "hopped up on Christmas" without weapons will get you a mob beating.

Even crazy, drug-addled weirdos wearing elf suits know that.

That guy is "penis goes where?" incarnate.

Them eyes have Graves Disease written all over them!

Concerns raised about elf & safety?

Came for JJ

leaving happy

What a weird plan. How did he think this was going to turn out?

I bet David Sedaris would've devoted at least 5 pages to this guy in his Santaland Diaries.

"Today a crazy man disguised as an elf created quite a scene when he revealed he was carrying dynamite. While the standard reaction was shock and panic, I could only look on, a quite hope growing in my heart. "Set it off, I silently pleaded. Take us all away from this farce. This velour suit is starting to itch, anyway."

apparently Marv's love of meth caused the end of the wet bandits.

/that's spelled W-E-T

bucket_pup: OMG - As someone that lived in Morrow, GA for 27+ years and saw Southlake mall being built, I am getting a kick out of this replies......

/// Lived at the "Goldmine" arcade during my wasted days of youth
//// Southlake mall is a shAthole now.
// Get the hell of my lawn.

I agree with you. That place used to be the main drag to shop or just hang out. It has definitely become "The 'Hood. It's the same with Macon Mall.

CaesarSneezy: What a weird plan. How did he think this was going to turn out?

i think his plan was

#1 - Meth
#2 - ???
#3 - Profit

/no battle plan survives first contact with meth

That is one of the scariest mugshots I've ever seen. His eyes are deader than a stripper's. Or Kristen Stewart's.

Shakespeare's Monkey: High maintenance Elf


/giggity

Harry Freakstorm: Christmas 2009. The year I hoped I would finally get my detonators from Santa. I spent all November dropping hints to the old man and mom but they just didn't get it.

Crazy Elf: Mom, if I got some detonators, I betcha I could blow up that abortion clinic down the street!

Crazy Elf's Mom: Oh dearie. Just leave that to the drunken church rabble. It's their fight. Now, how would you like Santa to bring you a nice .410 shotgun for Christmas. If you got those detonators, you'd just blow your eyes out.

Crazy Elf: He brought me a .410 last year and the police took it away from me.

I even tried to work my teacher by writing the bestest essay about how detonators are the best gift and I would be so careful with them. But try as I might, I couldn't sway the liberal old hag.

Teacher: Crazy Elf, your essay was full of extreme right wing ants and your detailed plan to blow up the international banking consortium is horribly flawed. I'm giving you a C+. Also, you'll blow your eyes out.

In desperation, I went to see Santa. I knew that if I showed him the dynamite I had made from various chemicals and gun powder, he would see that I was sincere and desperately needed those detonators. I waited in line behind some goofy kid who kept talking about asking Santa for Pinnacle Chip based computer. Stupid Dexter. Finally! I made it to the Jolly Old Saint's lap. But I froze! Santa was impatient. "What do you want? Aren't you a little old to be here, kid?" Hands grabbed me and started to direct me to the slide. It was now or never! I blurted it out just as quickly as I could:

Crazy Elf: I have dynamite in my bag! I need detonators to return the United States to the Jesus centric nation is should forever be!

Santa: Mall Security! By the way kid, You'll only blow your eyes out (pushes crazy elf down the slide).


There is a reason all of your posts are bright green.

Bravo!