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(Cincinnati Enquirer)   ♫ Grandma got pulled over by a trooper / Driving with a kid Thanksgiving Eve / You may say that jailing her's excessive / But then again, she blew point four fifteen ♫   (news.cincinnati.com) divider line 79
    More: Stupid  
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5170 clicks; posted to Main » on 26 Nov 2009 at 6:33 AM (5 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



79 Comments   (+0 »)
   

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2009-11-25 10:00:22 PM  
Made me chuckle. +1
 
2009-11-25 10:26:34 PM  
Golf Clap!
 
2009-11-25 10:28:01 PM  
Ha!
 
2009-11-25 10:58:49 PM  
Bravo is not just a channel on basic cable.

+01.415

Well done, Subby. Well done.
 
2009-11-25 10:59:44 PM  
Goddamn. At what point do they start measuring the blood in your alcohol?
 
2009-11-25 11:09:09 PM  
I want to know how impaired she was. BAC doesn't tell you crap. I know people who are tipsy after two drinks and others who can hold a conversation after six.

She was coherent enough to keep it between the signs, very few people could do such a feat. Yes she shouldn't have been driving, but actual impairment is what's important when operating a vehicle. Not an arbitrary number that MADD says is too high every few years.

Another question. Did they use just a breath test or did they do blood testing? If it was just breath I wonder what her partition ratio is?
 
2009-11-26 12:17:43 AM  
i55.photobucket.com
 
2009-11-26 12:32:53 AM  
Drive faster, Grandma! Grandma's gaining on us!
 
2009-11-26 12:58:28 AM  
Bloody. Hell.

:-/


That said about the grandma in question... great job, subby (and I say that as someone who's driven absolutely MAD by that song)!

/+1
 
2009-11-26 02:43:24 AM  
.415 is some serious intoxication. Many people would be passed out in the gutter, choking on their own vomit at that point. I give her props for still being awake.
 
2009-11-26 03:10:09 AM  
"According to blood alcohol statistics, someone at her weight - 180 pounds, according to her ticket - would have to consume at least a dozen drinks to register that high."

Yeah, and in about 15 minutes too.
 
2009-11-26 06:20:29 AM  
She was arrested Tuesday. This is America. Thanksgiving is Thursday, not Wednesday. Tuesday is not Thanksgiving eve.

And at least some of the credit has to go to the original writers of the story since they came up with the whole "Grandma didn't get run over" idea.

That being said. Nice job.
 
2009-11-26 06:40:01 AM  
For the headline.
 
2009-11-26 06:43:41 AM  
Plus one golf clapping internets, insert "Citizen Kane" .gif here, and Subby wins the morning!

/anybody know why a GIS for "Citizen Kane clap" brings up a *lot* of pictures of monkeys?
 
2009-11-26 06:45:34 AM  
But then again, she blew point four fifteen ♫

At first, I thought that was there just to fit the rhyme and meter. Then I read the article.

How the hell was this woman still conscious?
 
2009-11-26 06:47:50 AM  
That was seriously funny, good job subby.
 
2009-11-26 06:49:00 AM  
Oh well done, Subby - that fits the rhythm of the original perfectly. I'm mentally nominating this for headline of the year (which means I won't actually remember to come back and do it later, but that you can take it as read: if I could be bothered to do such things, yours would be the headline I'd do it for.)
 
b3x
2009-11-26 06:49:06 AM  
Parents really ought to not leave their kids with alcoholics and drug addicts. they simply don't make good babysitters. regardless of whether they are grandparents, aunts/uncles, or neighbors. especially not if they are the boyfriends and girlfriends of a parent, boyfriends and girlfriends are notorious child abuser/murderers.

parents ought to be charged for endangering their child by leaving them with a irresponsible alcoholic.
 
2009-11-26 06:51:18 AM  
Grandma was officially f*cked up with a .415
 
2009-11-26 06:56:05 AM  
Gawd... associating something that looks like that with blowing ANYTHING can really ruin your appetite.. and on Thanksgiving, that's evil subby!
 
2009-11-26 06:57:20 AM  
Great headline.

On the other hand, .415? Since I'm not a drinker, haven't built up tolerance, I suspect that would kill me outright.
 
2009-11-26 06:58:16 AM  
b3x: Parents really ought to not leave their kids with alcoholics and drug addicts. they simply don't make good babysitters. regardless of whether they are grandparents, aunts/uncles, or neighbors. especially not if they are the boyfriends and girlfriends of a parent, boyfriends and girlfriends are notorious child abuser/murderers.

parents ought to be charged for endangering their child by leaving them with a irresponsible alcoholic.


Yeah, they should both be raped with a rusty tire iron and thrown into a tire fire. Death is too good for them though, maybe they should be strapped into a bed for the next 20 years only to be set free with no further assistance other than just throwing them on the street? Maybe we could send them to a Klingon prison planet and let them freeze to death or beaten by dangerous alien criminals? Wrapped in wet rawhide and let to dry in the sun so they get squeezed out like toothpaste? UFIA?
 
2009-11-26 07:01:19 AM  
Alphax: Great headline.

On the other hand, .415? Since I'm not a drinker, haven't built up tolerance, I suspect that would kill me outright.


Me too. I have maybe one Rum & Dr. Pepper a week... and that's just a tiny splash of Rum. 0.415? Holy hell I'd be dead.
 
2009-11-26 07:07:09 AM  
+1 subby
 
2009-11-26 07:12:22 AM  
Jgok: Alphax: Great headline.

On the other hand, .415? Since I'm not a drinker, haven't built up tolerance, I suspect that would kill me outright.

Me too. I have maybe one Rum & Dr. Pepper a week... and that's just a tiny splash of Rum. 0.415? Holy hell I'd be dead.


I have NyQuil when I get sick, every few years. That's all I drink..
 
2009-11-26 07:15:35 AM  
my grandma is dead or I am sure I would get a kick out of these replies
 
2009-11-26 07:17:29 AM  
Alphax: Jgok: Alphax: Great headline.

On the other hand, .415? Since I'm not a drinker, haven't built up tolerance, I suspect that would kill me outright.

Me too. I have maybe one Rum & Dr. Pepper a week... and that's just a tiny splash of Rum. 0.415? Holy hell I'd be dead.

I have NyQuil when I get sick, every few years. That's all I drink..


No worries.....I make up for your lack of imbibing. Probably by Jan 2nd every year.
 
2009-11-26 07:28:56 AM  
DAMN YOU, subby! Damn you to HELL!!!
 
2009-11-26 07:42:54 AM  
excellent, subby!

i384.photobucket.com

/+1
 
2009-11-26 07:53:59 AM  
Jgok:

Me too. I have maybe one Rum & Dr. Pepper a week... and that's just a tiny splash of Rum. 0.415? Holy hell I'd be dead.


How did you get a fark card?
 
2009-11-26 07:56:25 AM  
b3x

STFU

BTW, Happy Thanksgiving
 
2009-11-26 08:11:38 AM  
"When you see someone who's in the mid .2s, they are unable to perform any remedial task,'' Ziegler said. "For her to be a .415, she's definitely got some kind of alcohol problem."

img252.imageshack.us
 
2009-11-26 08:13:08 AM  
It's too bad that state and local law enforcement *don't* inform the public that they'll be patrolling for drunks extra-dilligently during Thanksgiving week...Dumbass.
 
2009-11-26 08:13:39 AM  
Great headline.

Now I'll be humming that damned song for the rest of the day.
 
2009-11-26 08:20:07 AM  
"According to blood alcohol statistics, someone at her weight - 180 pounds, according to her ticket - would have to consume at least a dozen drinks to register that high."

I'm just getting started at a dozen beers.
 
2009-11-26 08:23:32 AM  
FTFA: Maria Krull, 46, ... her 5-year-old granddaughter

A grandma at least as young as 41, and plausibly earlier...Good thing they're breeding quickly in that family.
 
2009-11-26 08:32:58 AM  
Ow My Balls: A grandma at least as young as 41, and plausibly earlier...Good thing they're breeding quickly in that family.

Yeah, I noticed that one as well. Family of winners.

Anyway, kudos to the submitter for that piece of brilliance.
 
2009-11-26 08:36:06 AM  
Crosshair: I want to know how impaired she was. BAC doesn't tell you crap. I know people who are tipsy after two drinks and others who can hold a conversation after six.



Drunk is drunk. .415 is nearly dead. You want to defend this person?

What do I know - I'm just an amateur drinker.
 
2009-11-26 08:51:27 AM  
edmo: Crosshair: I want to know how impaired she was. BAC doesn't tell you crap. I know people who are tipsy after two drinks and others who can hold a conversation after six.



Drunk is drunk. .415 is nearly dead. You want to defend this person?

What do I know - I'm just an amateur drinker.


Well you responded to a professional retard.

I am guessing you have been drinking so excusable?
 
2009-11-26 08:55:28 AM  
Very nice!
 
2009-11-26 09:00:55 AM  
yikes.

i wonder if she even strapped the 5 year old into a car seat?
 
2009-11-26 09:04:02 AM  
b3x: boyfriends and girlfriends are notorious child abuser/murderers.

Are you retarded, drunk, or both?

Filth Paste: I'm just getting started at a dozen beers.

I really think they needed to qualify that statement with a time frame. Back in my Mardi Gras days it wasn't unusual to get to 20-24 drinks before passing out, but it was over quite a few hours.
 
2009-11-26 09:08:15 AM  
Excellence is the only word that comes to mind. Great Job.

As for the grandma... a part of me is impressed that she could even walk to the car, another part knows she needs to be locked in a rehab facility and have her IQ tested while she's in there. She should have a scan of her liver hanging up as a trophy, or maybe a memorial.
 
2009-11-26 09:08:41 AM  
Nice headline. +1
 
2009-11-26 09:12:29 AM  
The Dread Pirate Robertson: Plus one golf clapping internets, insert "Citizen Kane" .gif here, and Subby wins the morning!

/anybody know why a GIS for "Citizen Kane clap" brings up a *lot* of pictures of monkeys?


www.beakem.org

as requested ...

bravo subby, brav-O!!!
 
2009-11-26 09:14:41 AM  
Danooli 2009-11-26 09:00:55 AM
yikes.

i wonder if she even strapped the 5 year old into a car seat?


Car seat? What's a car seat?
 
2009-11-26 09:15:27 AM  
Crosshair: I want to know how impaired she was. BAC doesn't tell you crap. I know people who are tipsy after two drinks and others who can hold a conversation after six.

Almost anyone can hold a conversation after six, although for some people you'll be able to tell that they've had something to drink.

But at .415, we aren't talking about six drinks, more like 20. That could kill someone who doesn't drink much, and even an experienced drinker would likely fall asleep before that unless they've been drinking for several days, which is probably what has happened in most of the very high BAC cases...
 
2009-11-26 09:22:54 AM  
WhatTheFoobies: unless they've been drinking for several days

Otherwise known as "the pickling stage".
 
2009-11-26 09:41:43 AM  
Late entry to the HOTY contest! +1
 
2009-11-26 09:54:24 AM  
edmo: Drunk is drunk. .415 is nearly dead. You want to defend this person?

Where did I say I wanted to defend this person? Drunk is most certainly not drunk. There are varying degrees of intoxication and varying tolerances to alcohol. Should she have been driving? No.

What I'm wondering is was she even able to walk when she got out? Could she put more then two words together. How impaired was she? My guess is that that she has such a high tolerance that she's as "drunk" as a lesser drunk at .2. Yes too much to drive, but she was drunk enough to kill a lesser person so the scale doesn't quite fit.

I also asked if they did a blood test or just a breath test and how many times they tested. A belch a few minutes before the test can raise the results on the Breathalyzer. Thus I asked about a blood test.

WhatTheFoobies: Almost anyone can hold a conversation after six, although for some people you'll be able to tell that they've had something to drink.

Correct, let me rephrase that, "Can hold a conversation and not know they have been drinking."

gothelder: Well you responded to a professional retard.

I always laugh at such "insults", though I dispense them at times as well. I try to only say things that I would say to a persons face. It would be interesting to actually meet some of the people that post on here and see how they are in real life.

There is a difference between "retarded" and "difference in opinion" that many people seem don't seem to realize. It's funny to watch all the online huffing and puffing and the thin skin that many people seem to have.

Whatever, off to another thread.
 
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