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(CNN)   As it turns out, even vegans can't stand "Tofurkey"   (edition.cnn.com) divider line 402
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10363 clicks; posted to Main » on 24 Nov 2009 at 1:42 PM (4 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2009-11-24 12:54:09 PM
I'm having vegetarian relatives over so I'm making a tofurducken.

Tofu chicken stuffed into a tofu duck and then stuffed into a tofu turkey.
 
2009-11-24 01:04:55 PM
I generally prefer freshly prepaired vegetables to many of the processed vegetarian foods.
 
2009-11-24 01:42:28 PM
Here come the people who can't stand the fact that people eat other food than they care for.

/why does it bother you so much
 
2009-11-24 01:43:23 PM
Tofu is not fit for human consumption
 
2009-11-24 01:44:05 PM
Mmmm...deep fried tofu
 
2009-11-24 01:44:26 PM
Yay! Another thread of vegetarian bashing! Let me start:

I hate you because of what you didn't have for lunch!
 
2009-11-24 01:44:36 PM
eddyatwork: Here come the people who can't stand the fact that people eat other food than they care for.

/why does it bother you so much


i think it mostly has to do with the fact that Tofu is associated with Vegetarians and most of us consider vegetarianism so mindblowingly stupid that it's painful - we're an omnivorous species

i personally hate Tofu because it's hormonally HORRIBLE for you, plus it tastes like shiat
 
2009-11-24 01:44:37 PM
collateraldamage.files.wordpress.com

/ getting this out of the way
 
2009-11-24 01:45:02 PM
Ahh tofu - the poser of foods.
 
2009-11-24 01:45:03 PM
For some reason I read the headline as

As it turns out, even vaginas can't stand "Tofurkey"

Meh, vegans / vaginas....same same.
 
2009-11-24 01:45:11 PM
vernonFL: I'm having vegetarian relatives over so I'm making a tofurducken.

Tofu chicken stuffed into a tofu duck and then stuffed into a tofu turkey.


Now we just need video of Chris Collinsworth mutilating and eating it noisily on national television...
 
2009-11-24 01:45:51 PM
Tofu that's made right is amazing, but most people make it very VERY wrong. Personally, if the English writing is bigger than the Chinese writing, I stay away.
 
2009-11-24 01:45:52 PM
This is what is wrong with Tofu: Isoflavones
 
2009-11-24 01:46:06 PM
If you want to be a vegan or vegetarian, that's fine. Stop crowing about it, shut the hell up, and eat whatever you want. The problem isn't what you eat, it's the fact you feel the need to advertise it to the rest of us like we give a damn.
 
2009-11-24 01:46:20 PM
The Quorn turkey isn't that bad. It comes in a Jimmy Dean style casing, it's made from some type of mushroom, and it has a decent poultry mouthfeel.

It's not my turkey, which rocks, but it's better than the dried out turkey that my aunt used to make when I was a kid. The woman was completely unfamiliar with the concepts of brining and tenting.
 
2009-11-24 01:46:48 PM
Kazan: Tofu is not fit for human consumption

And yet many people eat it all the time. Go figure.
 
2009-11-24 01:46:51 PM
I'm a carnivore here. Tofurky is good stuff.
The name is very misleading, since there is more Wheat Gluten in it than there is tofu.
 
2009-11-24 01:46:53 PM
This is what is wrong with Tofu: Isoflavones

FTFM
 
2009-11-24 01:46:59 PM
eddyatwork: Here come the people who can't stand the fact that people eat other food than they care for.

/why does it bother you so much


It's not what they don't eat. The problem is vegans have the worse farking gas in the universe. Farts can be funny, but oh, my farking gawd do the vegans take it to a new level.
 
2009-11-24 01:47:05 PM
The Southern Dandy: For some reason I read the headline as

As it turns out, even vaginas can't stand "Tofurkey"

Meh, vegans / vaginas....same same.




Not really, my vagina eats meat.
 
2009-11-24 01:47:12 PM
Kazan: eddyatwork: Here come the people who can't stand the fact that people eat other food than they care for.

/why does it bother you so much

i think it mostly has to do with the fact that Tofu is associated with Vegetarians and most of us consider vegetarianism so mindblowingly stupid that it's painful - we're an omnivorous species



its stupid that I dont want to eat meat because of personal preference in which no ways effects anyone else in anyway? Am I missing something?
 
2009-11-24 01:47:35 PM
Well, crap. There goes my idea to market Tofurducken.
 
2009-11-24 01:47:42 PM
I prefer seitan but meh, whatever.
 
2009-11-24 01:48:05 PM
vernonFL: I'm having vegetarian relatives over so I'm making a tofurducken.

Tofu chicken stuffed into a tofu duck and then stuffed into a tofu turkey.


I just threw up in my mouth a little
 
2009-11-24 01:48:17 PM
tofurkey is f*cking crap, but vegan thanksgiving is super awesome. lots more dishes, and lots more variety.
 
2009-11-24 01:48:33 PM
Kazan: This is what is wrong with Tofu: Isoflavones

Given that I can't stand children, temporarily reduced fertility is the least of my worries.
 
2009-11-24 01:48:42 PM
Meat substitutes are only used when my carnivorous family members over. I typically don't eat them. There are plenty of other protein loaded plants to get it from.

/vegan with freegan tendancies.
 
2009-11-24 01:48:58 PM
according to fark being vegetarian is worse than smoking.

you guys are great.

i mean retarded.
 
2009-11-24 01:49:51 PM
I made one when I was a vegetarian. They suggest basting in orange juice, wrapping with foil, and baking. Well as you can imagine, the foil becomes one with the burnt orange juice.

I still scraped and ate the fecking thing.
 
2009-11-24 01:50:07 PM
misanthropic1: Kazan: This is what is wrong with Tofu: Isoflavones

Given that I can't stand children, temporarily reduced fertility is the least of my worries.


It's like when people say "you know that when you smoke weed, it reduces your fertility." This is supposed to be a threat.
 
2009-11-24 01:50:11 PM
How many of you people actually eat turkey on Thanksgiving? Why should a noble bird give up its life just because you want to pig out and watch football? All of you should be ashamed of yourselves, and I can only hope you do the right thing and "go veg" this thanksgiving. Would you be okay with eating a cat or a dog for Thanksgiving?
 
2009-11-24 01:50:13 PM
kennydra: according to fark being vegetarian is worse than smoking.

you guys are great.

i mean retarded.


This!
 
2009-11-24 01:50:27 PM
mentalfloss.cachefly.net
I'll just leave this deep-fried, bacon-wrapped turkey here...
 
2009-11-24 01:50:53 PM
MEAT IS MURDER!

Tasty, tasty murder. mmm with gravy
 
2009-11-24 01:50:54 PM
My ex's uncle made faux-turkey one year. It had to be some kind of tofu base, but all I noticed was an overwhelming amount of spices. I have had some excellent vegetarian substitutes, but it's really hard to get a solid meat product right.
 
2009-11-24 01:51:44 PM
surrender903:


its stupid that I dont want to eat meat because of personal preference in which no ways effects anyone else in anyway? Am I missing something?


since when does something have to effect others to be stupid?

we're an omnivorous species.. you need meat in your diet - you can successfully live without it through supplementation, but it is not optimal.

i really don't mind it beyond thinking it's silly until people get all preachy about it OR impose it on children.
 
2009-11-24 01:51:55 PM
Unclefarktard: That is all.

Brainsick: I'll just leave this deep-fried, bacon-wrapped turkey here...


BEST SIMULPOST EVER!!!!!
 
2009-11-24 01:52:07 PM
I like McNuggets
http://tinyurl.com/yhgdm8f
(copy and paste)
 
2009-11-24 01:52:15 PM
kennydra: according to fark being vegetarian is worse than smoking.

you guys are great.

i mean retarded.


Well now I'm confused because farkers hate smoking because it reminds them of the cruel taunts they faced at the hands of the cool kids (who of course smoked because they are cool). Does this mean that farkers were taunted by vegetarians as well?

Wow, talk about being at the bottom of the loser pile.
 
2009-11-24 01:52:15 PM
kennydra: according to fark being vegetarian is worse than smoking.

you guys are great.

i mean retarded.


You sound fa... Looks at profile...


/never mind
 
2009-11-24 01:52:21 PM
The_Sponge: How many of you people actually eat turkey on Thanksgiving? Why should a noble bird give up its life just because you want to pig out and watch football? All of you should be ashamed of yourselves, and I can only hope you do the right thing and "go veg" this thanksgiving. Would you be okay with eating a cat or a dog for Thanksgiving?

Until I found out she was 2 timing me, I had every intention of eating a pussy for Thanksgiving.
 
2009-11-24 01:52:39 PM
kennydra: according to fark being vegetarian is worse than smoking.


said who mr pulls-things-out-of-your-arse
 
2009-11-24 01:52:55 PM
Vegetarian Thanksgiving?

2.bp.blogspot.com
 
2009-11-24 01:53:00 PM
Isn't there a bacon-covered turducken pic out there?
 
2009-11-24 01:53:08 PM
The_Sponge: Unclefarktard: That is all.

Brainsick: I'll just leave this deep-fried, bacon-wrapped turkey here...


BEST SIMULPOST EVER!!!!!


Mark down another set of alts.
 
2009-11-24 01:53:27 PM
The_Sponge: How many of you people actually eat turkey on Thanksgiving? Why should a noble bird give up its life just because you want to pig out and watch football? All of you should be ashamed of yourselves, and I can only hope you do the right thing and "go veg" this thanksgiving. Would you be okay with eating a cat or a dog for Thanksgiving?

how many noble plants had to die for your salad, preachy asshat?


9/10 - nearly perfectly executed
 
2009-11-24 01:53:34 PM
Bacon wrapped, deep-fried simulpost in MY vegan thread?

Unclefarktard: That is all.

Also:
Ben Enya: MEAT IS MURDER!

Tasty, tasty murder. mmm with gravy


THIS!

The_Sponge: How many of you people actually eat turkey on Thanksgiving? Why should a noble bird give up its life just because you want to pig out and watch football? All of you should be ashamed of yourselves, and I can only hope you do the right thing and "go veg" this thanksgiving. Would you be okay with eating a cat or a dog for Thanksgiving?

I have eaten dog. Not MY dog, but yes, yes I would.
 
2009-11-24 01:53:45 PM
Awesome. Just awesome.
 
2009-11-24 01:54:03 PM
vernonFL: I'm having vegetarian relatives over so I'm making a tofurducken.

Tofu chicken stuffed into a tofu duck and then stuffed into a tofu turkey.


Would that be called a tof*ckin, cause that sounds awful.
 
2009-11-24 01:54:09 PM
The_Sponge: Unclefarktard: That is all.

Brainsick: I'll just leave this deep-fried, bacon-wrapped turkey here...


BEST SIMULPOST EVER!!!!!


THIS!!! Utterly awesome
 
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