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(Some Guy)   Art caskets: Because nothing symbolizes death with dignity more than being laid out in a "Return to Sender" coffin   (americancasketstore.com) divider line 102
    More: Weird, Georgia, discounts, Leonardo da Vinci, sender, eternal life, delivery, tributes, Last Supper  
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13022 clicks; posted to Main » on 14 Nov 2009 at 10:57 AM (5 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



102 Comments   (+0 »)
   

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2009-11-14 09:08:46 AM  
Now you can be the white-trashiest person in the cemetery!

I'm guessing in a year or two, they'll come out with a Thomas Kinkade version.
 
2009-11-14 09:24:45 AM  
Servicing Thousands of Families Since 1997

Which, coincidentally, was the last time the site was redesigned. Not to mention the inability to differentiate "servicing" and "serving".
 
2009-11-14 10:26:00 AM  
I wanna be mummified.
 
2009-11-14 11:01:23 AM  
I'm in the wrong business.
 
2009-11-14 11:01:50 AM  
That's just foul. I want a woven rattan basket, please.
 
2009-11-14 11:01:56 AM  
So now I can get a coffin decorated as a pine box!
 
2009-11-14 11:02:09 AM  
410 Gone
 
2009-11-14 11:02:16 AM  
Link farked already?
 
2009-11-14 11:02:44 AM  
atomic-age: Link farked already?

We killed it.
 
2009-11-14 11:03:09 AM  
No "Dante's Inferno" model for me
 
2009-11-14 11:05:08 AM  
Farked
 
2009-11-14 11:05:54 AM  
www.3pointd.com

This can only be Japan.
 
2009-11-14 11:05:55 AM  
I smell a photoshop thread brewing
 
2009-11-14 11:06:36 AM  
We have meeped the server!
 
2009-11-14 11:06:56 AM  
I use to make up elaborate scenarios that I wanted to have for my funeral. Being made into a diamond was a good one. But my favorite idea was to have a closed casket funeral, but actually have my corpse posed in a chair in the back of the room with a hat pulled low to look like I was just a sleeping guy.

When I actually had a loved one who would be in charge of putting that stuff together though, I told her to do whatever she wanted, because I would be beyond caring.
 
2009-11-14 11:07:41 AM  
Better site... (new window)
 
2009-11-14 11:08:11 AM  
I don't want to burn, rot, or be mummified.

That leaves only one option: Total and instantaneous self annihilation.

/wut
 
2009-11-14 11:09:47 AM  
I'm building my own casket. No serious, its DIY. Carving it out of one large piece of wood, lining the inside how I like, carving decoration on the outside. I'm even looking at some metal working classes to put a likeness of myself over the top.

Its just an excuse really to take some classes and do some crafty sorts of stuff I've always wanted to try. That and I'll have comfort of knowing what to expect when I die. Anything after that, I really don't care what happens. I told the hubby he can burn it all if he likes, bury it, or dump it into the ocean.

Though letting the coffin float in outer space would be super cool.
 
2009-11-14 11:15:21 AM  
I actually like the lighthouse one. My trailerpark must be leaking out. :|
 
2009-11-14 11:15:56 AM  
gadian: I'm building my own casket. No serious, its DIY. Carving it out of one large piece of wood, lining the inside how I like, carving decoration on the outside. I'm even looking at some metal working classes to put a likeness of myself over the top.

Its just an excuse really to take some classes and do some crafty sorts of stuff I've always wanted to try. That and I'll have comfort of knowing what to expect when I die. Anything after that, I really don't care what happens. I told the hubby he can burn it all if he likes, bury it, or dump it into the ocean.

Though letting the coffin float in outer space would be super cool.


Put a little steam engine on it and tell him to put in on the ocean. That would be cool.
 
2009-11-14 11:16:52 AM  
Building my own plain pine box, out of wood that I harvest and shape myself. Planning on cremation, so why spend the huge money, when it can be more personal.
 
2009-11-14 11:18:42 AM  
"We all remember James just loved those tacky paintings of lighthouses, so we figured this is the kind of bullsh*t he would have chosen."
 
2009-11-14 11:20:01 AM  
Foxie299: gadian:

Though letting the coffin float in outer space would be super cool.

Put a little steam engine on it and tell him to put in on the ocean. That would be cool.


That would be cool. I'd be my own ship at sea. Toot toot!
 
2009-11-14 11:20:30 AM  
My remains are going to be used to train cadaver dogs.
Unless I die before my mother-in-law, in that case I would like to be cremated and have my ashes blown into her eyes.

/Ashes idea is an old fark headline, but all mine now!
 
2009-11-14 11:25:49 AM  
I think those look just horrible and some are just plain white trash (NASCAR? Last Hunt?). But if someone wants buried in one of those then more power to them. My uncle would probably like the Last Haul as he like crappy stuff like that and was a trucker.
 
2009-11-14 11:27:16 AM  
The first few looked nice, like the last supper one, but then they turned redneck really fast. I had to stop at the Nascar one, I mean FFS.

They're going to be rusting in the ground anyway, what's the point.
 
2009-11-14 11:29:05 AM  
I remember when my grandfather died in 92, there was this huge argument amongst my aunts and mother about the casket. Cremation was out because at the time that parish of the Catholic Church. They ended up with this powder blue with praying hands thing that by most accounts didn't seem like something my grandfather would have wanted to be seen in.

He was a huge hunter and fisher- I wish we could have found that hunter's casket for him instead.

/for me, as the song goes, 'Send Me to Glory in a Glad Bag'
 
2009-11-14 11:30:46 AM  
I've always wanted to be stuffed, like Jeremy Benthem crossed with a bear. I'll be posed ready to attack, and mounted in the living room.
 
2009-11-14 11:35:31 AM  

Hallows_Eve


They ended up with this powder blue with praying hands thing that by most accounts didn't seem like something my grandfather would have wanted to be seen in.


I'll apologize now for thinking that you might have said "something [your] grandfather would have wanted to be caught dead in".

No offense meant. Honestly, how often can a statement like that be taken literally?
 
2009-11-14 11:39:18 AM  
gadian: I'm building my own casket. No serious, its DIY. Carving it out of one large piece of wood, lining the inside how I like, carving decoration on the outside. I'm even looking at some metal working classes to put a likeness of myself over the top.

Its just an excuse really to take some classes and do some crafty sorts of stuff I've always wanted to try. That and I'll have comfort of knowing what to expect when I die. Anything after that, I really don't care what happens. I told the hubby he can burn it all if he likes, bury it, or dump it into the ocean.

Though letting the coffin float in outer space would be super cool.


There was an article a few years ago that was a small group of terminally ill people who were taking classes to make their own caskets. I believe it was to help them retain control of their affairs and wishes and work through acceptance. I think it takes a great amount of inner peace to be able to undertake such a thing.

Though...I have to admit, the first thing I thought of with putting a likeness over top was a sort of Han Solo in Carbonite pose...vertically placed during the funeral.
 
2009-11-14 11:48:50 AM  
LeroyBourne: This can only be Japan.

Ghana, actually (new window).
 
2009-11-14 11:50:37 AM  
"Maybe it's the sea gulls effortlessly gliding overhead. Then again . . . "

NOTHING with Dump Chickens on it - please.

Most of it is pretty funny though. I've seen/ read an article on this kind of thing going on in some places. Hand carved and looking like a fish of some sort, wild painting. They look pretty cool for what they are.

This on the other hand . . . they seem kinda trashy except for the "Return to Sender" which is exempt from Trashy because of the all important "Humor Factor".

I'll be dead so it's pretty much what you want to look at for a day or two.
 
2009-11-14 11:51:46 AM  
Englebert Slaptyback:

I'll apologize now for thinking that you might have said "something [your] grandfather would have wanted to be caught dead in".

No offense meant. Honestly, how often can a statement like that be taken literally?


Tis' okay, none taken- I thought the same thing. :)

My family was more concerned about how he should be seen by those coming to the viewings. They made the whole thing so somber that they forgot to honor the roly poly, fun loving, Pennsyltuckian guy with a great sense of humor, deer heads and gun racks on the wall, and a Brooklyn accent. The body in the suit and powder blue casket conveyed a church goer who never heard a joke or swear word.
 
2009-11-14 11:52:02 AM  
Boy howdy, those things are tacky.
 
2009-11-14 11:55:51 AM  
FTFA: "This model pays tribute to those who spent their lives on lonely, moonlit highways with the pedal to the medal, delivering the goods that sustain a nation."

Why wear a medal when you can put a pedal to it?
 
2009-11-14 11:57:20 AM  
They...definitely know their market.
 
2009-11-14 11:58:42 AM  
Where's the hookers and beer model?
 
2009-11-14 12:05:02 PM  
I'd love to spend my final resting place with a warm snuggly vag wrapped around me. Unfortunately, as in life, it wouldn't last long enough.
 
2009-11-14 12:10:40 PM  
There is something extremely funny about it:
 
2009-11-14 12:12:01 PM  
woodstock: There is something extremely funny about it:

www.americancasketstore.com
 
2009-11-14 12:19:07 PM  
I keep telling my wife I want to be encased in acrylic and kept in the living room to freak people out. I'd be like one of those tacky paperweights with a scorpion in it.
 
2009-11-14 12:19:35 PM  
This screams photoshop contest if you ask me....
Return to Sender was pretty damn funny even if it was tacky.
 
2009-11-14 12:24:02 PM  
firefly6: This screams photoshop contest if you ask me....

THIS.
 
2009-11-14 12:57:51 PM  
I think those are pretty cool, actually. Nothing I'd be interested in for me or my loved ones, but I could understand someone wanting one.
 
2009-11-14 01:05:59 PM  
craziestgadgets.com
 
2009-11-14 01:07:03 PM  
Hallows_Eve:

Though...I have to admit, the first thing I thought of with putting a likeness over top was a sort of Han Solo in Carbonite pose...vertically placed during the funeral.


Y'know, that's EXACTLY what my brother wants. He's a total Star Wars fanatic & wants his funeral to be as entertaining as possible. Unfortunately for him, his wife found God and is now a Bible-thumping Fundie. She'll never allow that now.

/Some people just have no sense of humor
//When we kids bought my father's funeral wreath, it had a huge banner that said, "Go Home. Show's Over." Muppet Movie was Dad's favorite.
 
2009-11-14 01:09:27 PM  
I thought the headline was going to end with "Return of the Jedi"...
 
2009-11-14 01:15:25 PM  
brigid_fitch: Hallows_Eve:

Though...I have to admit, the first thing I thought of with putting a likeness over top was a sort of Han Solo in Carbonite pose...vertically placed during the funeral.

Y'know, that's EXACTLY what my brother wants. He's a total Star Wars fanatic & wants his funeral to be as entertaining as possible. Unfortunately for him, his wife found God and is now a Bible-thumping Fundie. She'll never allow that now.


I'm a Bible-thumping Fundie and I can't find a verse that says God doesn't want you frozen in carbonite.
 
2009-11-14 01:16:24 PM  
I want to be stuffed into a garbage bag and be put out on the curb on garbage night.

/after I die that is
 
2009-11-14 01:26:46 PM  
shivashakti: I'm guessing in a year or two, they'll come out with a Thomas Kinkade version.

WINNER!

/Tasteless to be sure...wow.
 
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