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(Some ChristWire)   Dramatic exposé on the "Golden Girls", how one show turned a generation of boys into homosexuals; sadly this article is not satire   (christwire.org) divider line 168
    More: Asinine, Golden Girls, American Boys, Duran Duran, hand gestures, Americans, Jerry Falwell, Governor Charlie Crist, libidos  
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30307 clicks; posted to Main » on 14 Nov 2009 at 8:35 AM (4 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



168 Comments   (+0 »)
   

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2009-11-13 09:00:05 AM
Girls, lets have some cheesecake and discuss this!
 
2009-11-13 09:01:25 AM
images.fanpop.com

BAH image didn't stick in Weeners.
 
2009-11-13 09:07:14 AM
This article is ridiculous enough to be amusing.
 
2009-11-13 09:08:21 AM
slayer199: This article is ridiculous enough to be amusing.

I really hope it goes green.
THIS IS WHAT ANTI-GAY CHRISTIANS ACTUALLY BELIEVE
 
2009-11-13 09:13:13 AM
That CIA is amazing with the technology it employs... They were able to infiltrate, using a weekly 1/2 tv show, the human DNA and alter it such that the sexual proclivities of guys were irreversibly* changed.

Bea Arthur I salute you!

*of course there are Christian-based means of revering the DNA alteration.
 
2009-11-13 09:14:03 AM
ummmm 1/2 hour tv show....

oy!
 
2009-11-13 09:15:24 AM
With articles like What NOT to say in a room full of black guys, A Father Gets Infected with Emo Spirits, Sodomy Is Never The Answer, and Holy crap, China wants to build a Deathstar!, I'm going to go out on a limb and say that's a satirical site.
 
2009-11-13 09:15:27 AM
This article is a gold mine of wharrgarble.
 
2009-11-13 09:16:09 AM
ne2d: With articles like What NOT to say in a room full of black guys, A Father Gets Infected with Emo Spirits, Sodomy Is Never The Answer, and Holy crap, China wants to build a Deathstar!, I'm going to go out on a limb and say that's a satirical site.

no, sadly, it's not!
 
2009-11-13 09:16:50 AM
That is some funny shiat. It's so very obviously satire. It's so full of sexual innuendo that it's blindly apparent to anyone but a poof.
 
2009-11-13 09:18:14 AM
detfrost1: no, sadly, it's not!

LMAO!
 
2009-11-13 09:28:04 AM
detfrost1: ne2d: With articles like What NOT to say in a room full of black guys, A Father Gets Infected with Emo Spirits, Sodomy Is Never The Answer, and Holy crap, China wants to build a Deathstar!, I'm going to go out on a limb and say that's a satirical site.

no, sadly, it's not!


How do you know?
 
2009-11-13 09:29:05 AM
sepuku2: detfrost1: no, sadly, it's not!

LMAO!


OK I need to retract my previous statement(s).

I just saw the ad for atlantis, and the FAQ is suspiciously absent. While some of the articles are apparently from mouth-breathing conservatives...I'm assuming the site is meant to be satirical.
 
2009-11-13 09:30:23 AM
ne2d: detfrost1: ne2d: With articles like What NOT to say in a room full of black guys, A Father Gets Infected with Emo Spirits, Sodomy Is Never The Answer, and Holy crap, China wants to build a Deathstar!, I'm going to go out on a limb and say that's a satirical site.

no, sadly, it's not!

How do you know?


Well in fairness, my partner is from Alabama, I've met people that believe this kind of shiat.
 
2009-11-13 09:44:26 AM
It's true. Before watching my first Golden Girls episode I had only experimented with by male cousin a couple of times, and even though I enjoyed that immenselya little it wasn't until I saw Bea Arthur, Betty White, Rue McClanahan, and Estelle Getty interacting on the screen that I began to seriously seek out some dick to suck on and be penetrated by.

Even today as I engage in these gloriousheathenish practices I think of the show and often run an interior highlight reel in my mind as I am getting plowed by some guy.
 
2009-11-13 09:47:10 AM
Please go green.
Please go green.
Please go green.
Please go green.
Please go green.
 
2009-11-13 09:47:42 AM
Thank you for being a friend!
 
2009-11-13 10:11:07 AM
my head asplode
 
2009-11-13 10:24:54 AM
You think that's bad, you should see what "Who's The Boss" did to me.

Damn you, Tony Danza!
 
2009-11-13 10:35:43 AM
Shouldn't the Golden Girls have turned a generation of girls into lesbian "roommates"?
 
2009-11-13 10:39:36 AM
there was a similar site many years ago(not Landover Baptist, i know that much) that did this kind of satire. they were supposed to be some sort of British Catholic church, and did alot of articles about DC hardcore bands(photoshopped ads of Rollins in Japanese beer ads, Straight Edge is an evil cult started by Ian MacKaye to kill your kids, that kind of shiat). went down back in 2004-2005 if i remember correctly. does anyone else remember that site?


/also, this site is hilarious
//the chinese are breeding a clone army, backed by fire breathing robots
///pray for Omarion.
 
2009-11-13 10:40:00 AM
bobbette: Shouldn't the Golden Girls have turned a generation of girls into lesbian "roommates"?

Nope, that was Doogie Howser MD that converted sweet het chicks to the lesbian lifestyle.
 
2009-11-13 10:40:09 AM
Spiritual leaders like Jerry Falwell were telling us that Christianity was in the majority again. On the other side, there was a subculture of homosexuality creeping up on our youths. It gave them an excuse to wear tight jeans and to sneak off to public parks for quick releases with hairy men of different ethnicities.

Oh come the fark on. How is this not a satire site? I have hard enough time spotting it as is...I feel like I am being punked.
 
2009-11-13 10:55:59 AM
Brooks and Done.
 
2009-11-13 11:49:43 AM
why the hell didn't this go green?
 
2009-11-13 11:51:08 AM
Godscrack: Brooks and Done.

? wut?
 
2009-11-14 08:39:39 AM
I always knew that I Dream of Genie was a gay allegory (alpha male bachelor has a secret he has to keep "bottled up"...) In the old days, the networks were a lot more subtle about slipping teh gay into our kids' TV shows. Next season they're just going to be completely blatant. Check out these three new shows:

"Honey I'm Homosexual": After 20 years of marriage and three children, a marketing account executive in his 40s comes out of the closet. His boyfriend moves into the spare bedroom of the family home leading to all kinds of mixups with friends, family, and visitors. Hilarity ensues.

"Extreme Makeover: Homo Edition": "Queer Eye" meets "Extreme Makeover" with fabulous results.

"Sex In the City": Four friends in NYC lead a stereotypically promiscuous urban gay male lifestyle while trying on expensive women's clothes and shoes. Nobody complains that this is corrupting American children because they are heterosexual women.
 
2009-11-14 08:40:28 AM
That is satire. Subtle enough to fool the believers, but so over-the-top that it's flamboyant.
 
2009-11-14 08:50:31 AM
Farked already.
 
2009-11-14 08:50:32 AM
vartian: Spiritual leaders like Jerry Falwell were telling us that Christianity was in the majority again. On the other side, there was a subculture of homosexuality creeping up on our youths. It gave them an excuse to wear tight jeans and to sneak off to public parks for quick releases with hairy men of different ethnicities.

Oh come the fark on. How is this not a satire site? I have hard enough time spotting it as is...I feel like I am being punked.


I have to think it's satire because it's so over the top...

but then, I remember talking to a few 'religious' friends of ours not to long ago, and I can almost here them saying this same thing...

so...not sure...
 
2009-11-14 08:51:25 AM
What's that law that states it's impossible to tell religious fundamentalist ranting from satire?

This might be a case of that.
 
2009-11-14 08:53:04 AM
....annnnnd farked.
 
2009-11-14 08:53:17 AM
img18.imageshack.us

Bea Arthur sees what you did there.
 
2009-11-14 08:54:44 AM
If any show turned me gay, it was Johnny Quest.
 
2009-11-14 08:55:53 AM
SO those fantasies I had as a kid of being in a threesome with Estelle Getty and Bea Arthur were...

GAY?!?!?!?!?!?!
 
2009-11-14 08:56:46 AM
lukelightning: What's that law that states it's impossible to tell religious fundamentalist ranting from satire?

This might be a case of that.


You're thinking of Henry's Law.
 
2009-11-14 08:57:11 AM
mrexcess: Bea Arthur sees what you did there.

Not Safe For Lunch (new window)
 
2009-11-14 08:58:53 AM
Im going with Poe's Law here.

/Got to be Satire
//But just crazy enough for it to be believable
 
2009-11-14 08:59:40 AM
Ecobuckeye: You're thinking of Henry's Law.

At a constant temperature, the amount of a given gas dissolved in a given type and volume of liquid is directly proportional to the partial pressure of that gas in equilibrium with that liquid.

sounds about right.
 
2009-11-14 08:59:47 AM
 
2009-11-14 09:05:29 AM
COLE'S LAW
 
2009-11-14 09:06:22 AM
Eff you, Grandma, for making me gay by FORCING me to watch Golden Girls, then disinviting me to Thanksgiving because I wanted to bring my boyfriend. Sure, you tried to spare my feelings by saying you just don't tolerate pickaninnies, but I know it's because I'm gay. It's your fault, you old broad!
 
2009-11-14 09:10:14 AM
Stani's Law.
 
2009-11-14 09:13:28 AM
I became a long haul truck driver because of "Cheers."
 
2009-11-14 09:15:02 AM
Yes it is pure satire..
 
2009-11-14 09:17:22 AM
About The Author
Stephenson Billings is an Investigative Journalist, Motivational Children's Party Entertainer and Antique Soda Bottle Collector all in one special, blessed package! Fanmail me St­ep­hens­on[nospam-﹫-backwards]e­ri­w­tsir­h­C*org !


Got to be satire... That's some resume there.
 
2009-11-14 09:17:35 AM
As a young boy growing up in the late 80s, I must say I was intrigued and excited about the sexual exploits of Blanche Devereaux.

www.hollywoodyesterday.com

Turn a generation gay? Quite the opposite, my dear Fundies. Quite the opposite.

/picture as hot as the Couger
 
2009-11-14 09:17:38 AM
I have never known what it is like to be so committed to something that is warps my perception of reality.

At least I don't have to wonder what it is like after these glimpses in wacky land.
 
2009-11-14 09:18:52 AM
Snoogit: SO those fantasies I had as a kid of being in a threesome with Estelle Getty and Bea Arthur were...

GAY?!?!?!?!?!?!


Yes, had you said Betty White and Rue McClanahan you would have been ok.
 
2009-11-14 09:19:22 AM
Also? Article is farked like Stanley farked Dorothy every season finale.
 
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