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(LBC 97.3)   Health officials advising against kids sitting on Santa's lap this year because of swine flu   (wtsp.com) divider line 42
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1393 clicks; posted to Main » on 12 Nov 2009 at 9:21 AM (4 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



42 Comments   (+0 »)
   

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2009-11-12 09:22:56 AM
I bet there are quite a few naughty girls that Santa would want sitting on his lap.
 
2009-11-12 09:23:31 AM
It's better than having to warn them against the "North Pole".
 
2009-11-12 09:29:22 AM
Actually, this year it's much safer.

i242.photobucket.com
 
2009-11-12 09:29:30 AM
You said you caught it on Santa's Lap? Sorry, ma'am, that's probably not the swine flu.
 
Biv
2009-11-12 09:29:30 AM
Well, there goes my dating options for this holiday season.
 
2009-11-12 09:29:57 AM
paulstallard.files.wordpress.com

I don't think he cares.

/more oblig
 
2009-11-12 09:30:34 AM
Here you go, yup, right here, okay - now you're going to feel a little prick.
 
2009-11-12 09:31:16 AM
Maybe we should enable voting - this could be a fun one.
 
2009-11-12 09:32:53 AM
img.photobucket.com
Begun, the war on christmas has...
 
2009-11-12 09:34:38 AM
Shakespeare's Monkey: I don't think he cares.

/more oblig


That is #1 on the list of awful movies that everyone thinks are good.
 
2009-11-12 09:37:54 AM
Santas are just as creepy as clowns unless they are drunk.

IMHO
 
2009-11-12 09:40:26 AM
If by "swine flu" you mean "pulsating boner," then yes.
 
2009-11-12 09:44:25 AM
Oh geez. What's next? "Christmas trees cause swine flu. Don't worry though, these "Holiday" trees are 100% swine flu free." Can we stop with the war on Christmas already?
 
2009-11-12 09:49:33 AM
Bosses beware that chasing secretaries around your desk at the annual company Christmas party could raise your risk to catching Swine Flu.
 
2009-11-12 09:55:40 AM
Sweet. Short lines for my kid, who's already had it.
 
2009-11-12 09:55:51 AM
Penis
 
2009-11-12 10:02:54 AM
Came looking for the old SNL Santi-Wrap clip.
 
2009-11-12 10:04:01 AM
this is a holiday tradition i'd like to see diaf. My husband insisted on Santa pictures every year with the eldest up until she was like 9. The first 2 or 4 are her in abject horror, the rest she's more amused + bemused.

I've never seen a kid who wa slike "Whoo Hoo!!! Time to go sit on some strange man's lap". Let's face it, oldsters, you've forgotten that by kindergarten, you'd already figured out that wasn't the "Real" Santa. Your kids ain't any dumber.

It's just weird, and if swine flu is the price we have to pay to make this that strange old tradition our great-grandkids will scratch their heads over, then a pandemic is a small price to pay.
 
2009-11-12 10:04:59 AM
Waiting for pedo-bear.
 
2009-11-12 10:08:15 AM
"SWINE FLU? AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!"
img.photobucket.com
 
2009-11-12 10:16:18 AM
i750.photobucket.com


FTFY
 
2009-11-12 10:17:04 AM
Then again, when it comes to Santa's like that, it's not the swine you got to worry about, it's the pork(ing).
 
2009-11-12 10:24:43 AM
At least it's not lupus.
 
2009-11-12 10:26:40 AM
Doktor Merkwrdiglieben: At least it's not lupus.

It's never lupus.
 
2009-11-12 10:52:30 AM
So THAT'S why the mall Santa Claus wasn't wearing any pants!
 
2009-11-12 11:13:38 AM
logophile: this is a holiday tradition i'd like to see diaf.

This. I don't plan on teaching my kids to believe in Santa -- I'm one of those spoil-sport parents who'll be telling them the truth about it -- so sitting on Santa's lap for a stupid picture is definitely out of the question. My mother completely agrees with me, but I know I'll have fights with the in-laws about this because they like taking the grandkids to have their pictures made with Santa.

/they'll have to settle for a generic picture of the kid in front of the tree
//boo-farking-hoo
 
2009-11-12 11:17:13 AM
At least now we know how Santa kept his sleigh in the air.

His reindeer flu.
 
2009-11-12 11:30:55 AM
Mentat: At least now we know how Santa kept his sleigh in the air.

His reindeer flu.


LOL
 
2009-11-12 11:32:21 AM
Mentat: At least now we know how Santa kept his sleigh in the air.

His reindeer flu.


>_<
 
Biv
2009-11-12 11:36:57 AM
DeathByCuriosity: logophile: this is a holiday tradition i'd like to see diaf.

This. I don't plan on teaching my kids to believe in Santa -- I'm one of those spoil-sport parents who'll be telling them the truth about it -- so sitting on Santa's lap for a stupid picture is definitely out of the question. My mother completely agrees with me, but I know I'll have fights with the in-laws about this because they like taking the grandkids to have their pictures made with Santa.

/they'll have to settle for a generic picture of the kid in front of the tree
//boo-farking-hoo


No fun parent is no fun.
 
2009-11-12 11:46:17 AM
DeathByCuriosity: logophile: this is a holiday tradition i'd like to see diaf.

This. I don't plan on teaching my kids to believe in Santa -- I'm one of those spoil-sport parents who'll be telling them the truth about it -- so sitting on Santa's lap for a stupid picture is definitely out of the question. My mother completely agrees with me, but I know I'll have fights with the in-laws about this because they like taking the grandkids to have their pictures made with Santa.

/they'll have to settle for a generic picture of the kid in front of the tree
//boo-farking-hoo


You're missing out on a lifetime of entertainment. Look at that shot above... That shiat will be funny long after those people are dead and buried.
 
2009-11-12 12:07:45 PM
And yet one more reason why the Americans wanted to be freed from British rule.....


CHRISTMAS origin history documentary saturnalia pagan mithra winter solstice
http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=3645112363868619851#
 
2009-11-12 12:11:52 PM
Bigglesworth III: I bet there are quite a few naughty girls that Santa would want sitting on his lap.

Back Door Santa! My what big...

\never mind
 
2009-11-12 12:14:12 PM
DeathByCuriosity: logophile: this is a holiday tradition i'd like to see diaf.

This. I don't plan on teaching my kids to believe in Santa -- I'm one of those spoil-sport parents who'll be telling them the truth about it -- so sitting on Santa's lap for a stupid picture is definitely out of the question. My mother completely agrees with me, but I know I'll have fights with the in-laws about this because they like taking the grandkids to have their pictures made with Santa.

/they'll have to settle for a generic picture of the kid in front of the tree
//boo-farking-hoo


Good lord, you gonna make your kids shoot the dog when it gets old too? Or do you not have a dog because it distracts kids from the fact life is a pointless, soul-crushing endeavor that ends in eventual death?
 
2009-11-12 12:22:35 PM
swine herpes
 
2009-11-12 12:31:57 PM
Biv: DeathByCuriosity: logophile: this is a holiday tradition i'd like to see diaf.

This. I don't plan on teaching my kids to believe in Santa -- I'm one of those spoil-sport parents who'll be telling them the truth about it -- so sitting on Santa's lap for a stupid picture is definitely out of the question. My mother completely agrees with me, but I know I'll have fights with the in-laws about this because they like taking the grandkids to have their pictures made with Santa.

/they'll have to settle for a generic picture of the kid in front of the tree
//boo-farking-hoo

No fun parent is no fun.


Kids will likely be cutters.

/"I need to FEEL...SOMETHING!"
 
2009-11-12 01:08:29 PM
What, the Florida tag's busted or something? Why not create a Patheti-sad tag or something for all these "swine-bird-Hong Kong-whatever flu" stories?
 
2009-11-12 01:29:32 PM
Wtf? They promised over the summer that the streets would be littered with the bodies of the dead, and dying in the Fall. It's nearly Thanksgiving already! What gives?
 
2009-11-12 01:57:05 PM
Whodat?: Shakespeare's Monkey: I don't think he cares.

/more oblig

That is #1 on the list of awful movies that everyone thinks are good.


It is a good movie. All other Christmas movies are stupid cheery bullshiat, and it's nice that someone finally addressed the negative aspects of Christmas. You're a douche.
 
2009-11-12 02:53:59 PM
TeddyRooseveltsMustache: Whodat?: Shakespeare's Monkey: I don't think he cares.

/more oblig

That is #1 on the list of awful movies that everyone thinks are good.

It is a good movie. All other Christmas movies are stupid cheery bullshiat, and it's nice that someone finally addressed the negative aspects of Christmas. You're a douche.


Christmas content notwithstanding, it's shiatty.

You're a turbodouche for calling me a douche over personal movie preferences.
 
2009-11-12 04:44:00 PM
that's not snot on his hands.
 
2009-11-12 06:23:33 PM
Whodat?: TeddyRooseveltsMustache: Whodat?: Shakespeare's Monkey: I don't think he cares.

/more oblig

That is #1 on the list of awful movies that everyone thinks are good.

It is a good movie. All other Christmas movies are stupid cheery bullshiat, and it's nice that someone finally addressed the negative aspects of Christmas. You're a douche.

Christmas content notwithstanding, it's shiatty.

You're a turbodouche for calling me a douche over personal movie preferences.


You're still wrong. And on the internet, no less.
 
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