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(Some Guy)   Minnesota traffic snarled after a fatal four-cow accident. Witnesses at the scene describe udder chaos   (inforum.com) divider line 41
    More: Unlikely, Clay County, Minnesota, Sheriff Bill Bergquist, traffic  
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2443 clicks; posted to Main » on 10 Nov 2009 at 5:58 PM (4 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



41 Comments   (+0 »)
   

Archived thread
 
2009-11-10 05:25:27 PM
Mooooooooooooove along, nothing to see here folks..
 
2009-11-10 05:35:57 PM
If only the cows had used their horns, they might have alerted the driver.
 
2009-11-10 05:36:58 PM
T-boned at the crossroads.
 
2009-11-10 05:42:11 PM
What an udderly clever headline.
 
2009-11-10 05:54:36 PM
Bad cow puns.

creditsuit.org
 
2009-11-10 05:58:43 PM
Everything must have ground to a halt.
 
2009-11-10 05:59:37 PM
UNC_Samurai: Bad cow puns.

People will be milking them for all they're worth.
 
2009-11-10 06:00:14 PM
Back in St. Olaf....
 
2009-11-10 06:01:06 PM
UNC_Samurai: Bad cow puns.

Got a beef with it?
 
2009-11-10 06:01:23 PM
Knock knock
Who's there?

Interrupting cow
Interup............
 
2009-11-10 06:02:05 PM
I'm going to steak out this thread for more puns.
 
2009-11-10 06:02:13 PM
Driving along lalalala..oh HOLY COW!!!

/Terrible, I know.
 
2009-11-10 06:02:18 PM
Did anyone get a moooooovvvving violation?
 
2009-11-10 06:02:31 PM
FTA A semitrailer hit and killed four cows that wandered onto a Clay County road Monday night, Sheriff Bill Bergquist said.

Heard they were all over the grille.
 
2009-11-10 06:02:35 PM
Well, there's no sense crying over spilled milk.
 
2009-11-10 06:02:52 PM
I herd that if you want to moove things along because you have to hoof it to your destination, use your horns.
 
2009-11-10 06:03:20 PM
MONSTERTRUCK: Knock knock
Who's there?

Interrupting cow
Interup............


MOO!
 
2009-11-10 06:03:33 PM
MorningBreath:
If only the cows had used their horns, they might have alerted the driver.

So he could steer around them.
 
2009-11-10 06:03:35 PM
Fat and docile, big and dumb
They look so stupid, they aren't much fun
Cows aren't fun

They eat to grow, they grow to die
They die to be eat at the hamburger fry
Cows well done

Nobody thunk it, nobody knew
No one imagined the great cow guru
Cows are one

He hid in the forest, read books with great zeal
He loved Che Guevera, a revolutionary veal
Cow Tse Tongue

He spoke about justice, but nobody stirred
He felt like an outcast, alone, in the herd.
Cow doldrums

He mooed we must fight, escape or we'll die
Cows gathered around, cause the stakes were so high
Bad cow pun

But then he was captured, stuffed into a crate
Loaded onto a truck, where he rode to his fate
Cows are bummed

He was a scrawny calf, who looked rather woozy
No one suspected he was packing Uzi
Cows with guns

They came with a needle to stick in his thigh
He kicked for the groin, he pissed in their eye
Cow well hung

Knocked over a tractor and ran for the door
Six gallons of gas flowed out on the floor
Run cows run!

He picked up a bullhorn and jumped up on the hay
We are free roving bovines, we run free today

We will fight for bovine freedom
And hold our large heads high
We will run free with the Buffalo, or die...
Cows with guns

They crashed the gate in a great stampede
Tipped over a milk truck, torched all the feed
Cows have fun

Sixty police cars were piled in a heap
Covered in cow pies, covered up deep
Much cow dump

Black smoke rising, darkening the day
Twelve burning McDonalds, have it your way

We will fight for bovine freedom
And hold our large heads high
We will run free with the Buffalo, or die
Cows with guns

The President said "Enough is Enough!
These uppity cattle, its time to get tough"
Cow dung flung

The newspapers gloated, folks sighed with relief
Tomorrow at noon, they would all be ground beef
Cows on buns

The cows were surrounded, they waited and prayed
They mooed their last moos,
they chewed their last hay
Cows out gunned

The order was given, turn cows to Whoppers
Enforced by the might of ten thousand coppers
But on the horizon, surrounding the shoppers
Came the deafening roar, of chickens, in choppers!

We will fight for bovine freedom
And hold our large heads high
We will run free with the buffalo, or die
Cows with guns

(new window)
 
2009-11-10 06:04:09 PM
St_Francis_P: UNC_Samurai: Bad cow puns.

People will be milking them for all they're worth.


That's no bull.
 
2009-11-10 06:07:19 PM
Hell bent for leather.
 
2009-11-10 06:10:11 PM
"There were 30 to 40 other cows reported at the scene, according to the police dispatch log."

This is the best line I've read in a news article for aaaaaaages!

Totally made my day.

/mooo
 
2009-11-10 06:10:55 PM
When I grow up, I want to go to Bovine University!
 
2009-11-10 06:13:34 PM
Hey! What do you call a cow that has only two legs?

Lean beef.
 
2009-11-10 06:18:08 PM
t1.gstatic.com

Said to be distraught.
 
2009-11-10 06:25:34 PM
ribeye
 
2009-11-10 06:29:05 PM
Tyler Durden: How's that working out for you?
Narrator: What?
Tyler Durden: Being clever.

/headline is clever... a little TOO clever.
 
2009-11-10 06:29:11 PM
::awaits TMLO's arrival with baited breath::

\wouldn't be a pun thread without him
 
2009-11-10 06:35:49 PM
One of the saner excuses for the traffic conditions that I've heard.
 
2009-11-10 06:35:49 PM
Oh, George. Not the livestock!
 
2009-11-10 06:42:36 PM
Enough with the not-terribly-creative pun headlines. Is there a particular admin responsible for greenlighting these (who has been particularly and unfortunately active today?)
 
2009-11-10 06:49:13 PM
The driver will likely be charged with a mooooooooooooving violation.
 
2009-11-10 06:52:19 PM
Moooo
    Moooo
        Moooo
            Moooo
 
2009-11-10 07:25:42 PM
Just commenting

hit and killed four cows that wandered onto

That? I love eating me some MN cows, it is very personal - I would prefer "who"

There were 30 to 40 other cows reported at the scene, according to the police dispatch log.


I love me some rubber necker cows too - thay all tastes like steak!
 
2009-11-10 07:28:19 PM
Good Behavior Day: I'm going to steak out this thread for more puns.

I will be praying for deliverance. But then agian, I can be marrow minded.
 
2009-11-10 07:33:26 PM
Dese cows never loin.
 
2009-11-10 08:03:34 PM
 
2009-11-10 08:46:55 PM
Now THAT'S funny.

/gasp
 
2009-11-10 09:17:27 PM
Who ever wrote the article HAS to be a closet Farker:

There were 30 to 40 other cows reported at the scene, according to the police dispatch log.

I don't even know why I think that's funny, but I do.
 
2009-11-10 09:58:49 PM
Oh the bovinity!
 
2009-11-10 10:58:05 PM
Why the unlikely tag? Most of the cows around here are kept off the road by a thin piece of rusty steel cable.

BTW, if this happens to you, grap the best cuts before the insurance company gets involved, or so I've herd.
 
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