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(Some Guy)   "Liquor Store Clerk Held Up by Screwdriver." No word on what the screwdriver used for a weapon   (am1150.ca) divider line 52
    More: Fail, clerk  
•       •       •

1813 clicks; posted to Main » on 09 Nov 2009 at 10:38 PM (5 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



52 Comments   (+0 »)
   

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2009-11-09 10:14:32 PM  
Vodka and orange juice.
 
2009-11-09 10:37:00 PM  
i'm not sure why this was greenlit. the thread was won in the boobies.
 
2009-11-09 10:39:22 PM  
An Irish Carbomb, probably.
 
2009-11-09 10:42:08 PM  
Was his name Harvey Wallbanger?
 
2009-11-09 10:42:58 PM  
Headline win
 
2009-11-09 10:44:11 PM  
4.bp.blogspot.com
 
2009-11-09 10:44:48 PM  
needs more double screwdrivers = falling down, usually...
/musta been a stingy-pour.
 
2009-11-09 10:45:07 PM  
Heh. WIN.
 
2009-11-09 10:45:24 PM  
www3.allaroundphilly.com

"Gimme all your money, or I'll make your glasses really, really wobbly."
 
2009-11-09 10:45:38 PM  
Put an APB out for a White Russian.
 
2009-11-09 10:46:36 PM  
Suspect is named Tom Collins and is riding in a sidecar.
 
2009-11-09 10:47:35 PM  
What an old fashioned kind of crime.
 
2009-11-09 10:48:54 PM  
pbfcomics.com
 
2009-11-09 10:49:05 PM  
How that horse became a doctor, I'll never know.
 
2009-11-09 10:49:17 PM  
+1 subby
 
2009-11-09 10:49:26 PM  
"Sorry I'm late to open the watering hole, Dad. Somebody put something in my orange juice"
 
2009-11-09 10:49:34 PM  
Came here for Getz/Bobcat reference, leaving satisfied.

Suspect is hatless, I repeat, hatless.
 
2009-11-09 10:49:34 PM  
I hope they don't move the screwdriver -- the clerk might fall down.
 
2009-11-09 10:50:00 PM  
A Molotov Cocktail, of course.
 
2009-11-09 10:50:06 PM  
www.recipetips.com
 
2009-11-09 10:50:18 PM  
grasshopper walks into a pub and sits down at the bar. bartender says "hey we've got a drink named after you." grasshopper says, "oh yeah? well give me your farking money or i'll cut you with this goddamned screwdriver!"
 
2009-11-09 10:51:36 PM  
An aboriginal male

They have aboriginies in Canada? Learn something new every day, eh?
 
2009-11-09 10:52:37 PM  
/approves.
 
2009-11-09 10:54:39 PM  
Maybe they meant 'Skrewdriver fans.' I could believe that.
 
2009-11-09 10:56:00 PM  
Something about Philip's head...
 
2009-11-09 10:56:04 PM  
I'll take a scotch and water hold the water.
 
2009-11-09 10:56:06 PM  
Stile4aly: How that horse became a doctor, I'll never know.

If it weren't for my horse, I wouldn't have spent that year in college.
 
2009-11-09 10:56:50 PM  
Hunter Hurst Helmsly identified the suspect as co-worker Montel Vontavious Porter.
 
2009-11-09 10:57:00 PM  
That's a strong alcoholic mix... where can I get a screwdriver like it?
 
2009-11-09 10:57:14 PM  
None of these guys looks like an abo!

www.foxnews.com
 
2009-11-09 10:58:27 PM  
Critic: None of these guys looks like an abo!

No, more like a Neanderthal
 
2009-11-09 10:58:29 PM  
knbwhite: Came here for Getz/Bobcat reference, leaving satisfied.

Suspect is hatless, I repeat, hatless.


And is driving a red...car
 
2009-11-09 10:58:46 PM  
Critic: None of these guys looks like an abo!

they sure as hell do look like neo-nazi freaks though. just a vibe I get.
 
2009-11-09 11:02:54 PM  
Critic: None of these guys looks like an abo!

I see what you did there.

I wonder if anyone will link any of thier music and get them self permabanninated. I mean a band that has songs like nubian nubian get on the boat would probably not be fark modmin approved.
 
2009-11-09 11:03:16 PM  
Didn't submit with a better headline, but "Would a stool have been more comfortable?" is that.
 
2009-11-09 11:04:27 PM  
Or "wouldn't," as I had intended to type. See, I can't even get fake headlines right, which is why I don't bribe the mods by getting TF.
 
2009-11-09 11:06:48 PM  
Oldiron_79: songs like nubian nubian get on the boat would probably not be fark modmin approved.

what's wrong with children's lullabies?
 
2009-11-09 11:06:56 PM  
Hagbardr: Vodka Vodak and orange juice.


Fixed for great justice.
 
2009-11-09 11:13:04 PM  
He's lucky they didn't use an electric screwdriver with a Torx bit.
 
2009-11-09 11:15:41 PM  
His accomplice, Margarita, is still at large.
 
2009-11-09 11:30:17 PM  
Subby missed a really obvious USIA joke.
 
2009-11-09 11:30:42 PM  
sprawl15

That always makes me laugh so hard.
 
2009-11-09 11:30:54 PM  
You mean there's a drink named Irving?

theballast.files.wordpress.com

/first thing that came to mind
//hot like "which one of you wants to lose their virginity?"
 
2009-11-09 11:56:33 PM  
You guys are slipping.
www.guyshampoo.com

Wanted for questioning.
 
CMP
2009-11-09 11:58:11 PM  
fusillade762: An aboriginal male

They have aboriginies in Canada? Learn something new every day, eh?


Aborigines in Australia, aboriginals in Canada, aka First Nations aka Natives aka Indians aka Aboriginal Peoples, etc.
And that sort of crime is run-of-the-mill stuff: cops in Winnipeg shot and killed a goon a while back when he pulled a screwdriver (a car thief's tool of choice) and tried to take on an armed officer. Ironically, armed cop was also aboriginal, aka Metis (formerly mixed-blood, half-breed, etc). Glock .40-caliber, two shots, IIRC.
 
2009-11-10 12:12:34 AM  
The All-Powerful Atheismo: Stile4aly: How that horse became a doctor, I'll never know.

If it weren't for my horse, I wouldn't have spent that year in college.


YES!
 
2009-11-10 12:52:30 AM  
He could always shotgun a beer.
 
2009-11-10 01:34:34 AM  
Later, clerk put down a few zombies with his bare hands.
 
2009-11-10 02:12:06 AM  
userserve-ak.last.fm
 
2009-11-10 04:35:56 AM  
What a tool.
 
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