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(Guardian) Dumbass Man found hanged in his own flat with no signs of struggle and no toxins in his body, so Ceredigion police take appropriate action: conduct a £20,000 investigation because a psychic said that he was forced to drink bleach   (guardian.co.uk) divider line 34
More: Dumbass, no signs, toxins, research, murders, drinks  
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3988 clicks; posted to Main » on 07 Nov 2009 at 4:02 AM   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»   |    Get this fabulous T-Shirt and impress the methane out of your friends! shirt it!



34 Comments   (+0 »)
   

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Aulus [TotalFark]
2009-11-07 02:12:22 AM
scifiwire.com

Unavailable for comment.
 
namatad [TotalFark]
2009-11-07 02:48:48 AM
eyup, kill the cops and the psychic.
it is the ONLY way to be sure

/people this dumb NEED killing. period.
 
Cagey B
2009-11-07 02:57:08 AM
I can provide advanced puddle analysis and a detailed spectrometer reading of the wood shavings at the scene for about half that amount.
 
CtrlAltDelete
2009-11-07 03:35:58 AM
I finally figured out what I can do with my life!
 
Britney Spear's Speculum
2009-11-07 04:09:09 AM
and no toxins in his body

Did they consult a holistic shawman to do the toxicology screening?
 
beerbaron
2009-11-07 04:17:13 AM
static.guim.co.uk

Could have saved them some money.
 
wild9
2009-11-07 04:18:30 AM
datalocker.files.wordpress.com

David Carradine did it first
 
UltimaCS
2009-11-07 04:18:38 AM
I lose a whole lot of faith in humanity when I come across crap like Psychic Detectives and realize that they have the undivided attention of people responsible for murder trials.

/I'm using a run-on sentence and nobody can stop me!
 
kydoug
2009-11-07 04:23:40 AM
Good, I think I'm finally going to get a job working for the state police as a psykick (spelling does'nt matter. I can only see the dead) and who killed them
 
Snotty1
2009-11-07 04:40:09 AM
Horsefeathers I say, Horsefeathers.
 
hardinparamedic
2009-11-07 05:05:15 AM
And Pseudoscience takes another sucker for a ride.
 
LavenderWolf
2009-11-07 05:07:42 AM
namatad: eyup, kill the cops and the psychic.
it is the ONLY way to be sure

/people this dumb NEED killing. period.

The damnedest thing is, you start opening fire at a psychic conference, they would've gone there to die. That's *deep* man.
 
FloydA [TotalFark]
2009-11-07 05:19:36 AM
The Bleach Boys:

I've got some buddies and we all drink bleach
you know we practice what we preach
We're not a drunken bunch of frat boys trashed on beer
or a stoned bunch of hippies with no careers
I wanna drink bleach with a Georgia Peach

My pals and I all drink Clorox
or eat Snowy bleach right out of the box
Teenage suicide rate shot high and we
understand the reason why
Bleach does more than whiten socks

Don't you wanna hang out with the bleach boys baby
in a land where ministers murder golf pros?
Don't you wanna drink some bleach tonight?

Maybe there'll be a party at the beach
We'll biatch about life and chug-a-lug bleach
No ones getting high and no one's getting drunk
we got a case of bleach stashed in the trunk.
I wanna die with clorox within reach.

I'm very proud of the respect I've earned
and my voice is very deep 'cause my throat got burned.
Bleach keeps you young so I've been told
'cause no one who drinks it lives to be old
Drink it with a chaser is the first thing I learned.

Don't you wanna hang out with the bleach boys baby
in a land where midgets run for mayor?
Don't you wanna drink some bleach tonight?

I had 26 friends in the beginning
but now it seems our numbers are thinning
Some people drive fast others love to bet
still others snort coke in a private jet.
But drinking bleach is my way of winning.

I'm so bored I'm drinking bleach
I'm so bored I'm drinking bleach
I'm so bored I'm drinking bleach
I'm so bored I'm drinking bleach
I'm so bored I'm drinking bleach
I'm so bored I'm drinking bleach...


~Dead Milkmen
 
Now I Is!
2009-11-07 05:20:02 AM
Wait, I know this one! It was an ice cube! ....Right...
...
...
...

/What?
 
Farker Soze
2009-11-07 05:44:08 AM
Hanging is a good way to stop the burning in your throat from drinking bleach. There are side effects though.
 
Neuticle
2009-11-07 05:49:09 AM
www.usanetwork.com
is channeling the ghost of David Carradine

/hot like Maggie Lawson
 
fanbladesaresharp
2009-11-07 06:47:03 AM
CtrlAltDelete: I finally figured out what I can do with my life!

What, burn some astrology books?
 
ThoughtSpy
2009-11-07 07:12:42 AM
I have zero belief in psychics or the like; I am a card carrying member of the JREF. But I cannot blame the police for this.

What if someone had an attack of conscience and was pretending to be a psychic and giving them real information, gleaned not from the dead mans ghost but from the fact that they were watching?

In this case I think the cops should send a bill to the 'psychics'. If I called in a false alarm for a rescue at sea I would be charged for the manpower.
 
pedobearapproved
2009-11-07 07:13:58 AM
I see fried chicken, ice cream, and bleach

media.southparkstudios.com
 
drxym
2009-11-07 07:26:35 AM
These idiot "psychics" should be charged with wasting police time. And any officer who takes them seriously without good cause should be reprimanded.
 
pedobearapproved
2009-11-07 07:26:45 AM
ThoughtSpy: I have zero belief in psychics or the like; I am a card carrying member of the JREF. But I cannot blame the police for this.

What if someone had an attack of conscience and was pretending to be a psychic and giving them real information, gleaned not from the dead mans ghost but from the fact that they were watching?

In this case I think the cops should send a bill to the 'psychics'. If I called in a false alarm for a rescue at sea I would be charged for the manpower.


While I don't always believe there should be a charge back for needed use of services that our taxes pay, but I'm with you about charging psychics 100%.

And what if they'd met a man named tony fox, at the red lion, and he was hung like a horse? That guy would be in for all kinds of questions.
 
Mugato [TotalFark]
2009-11-07 08:23:15 AM
drxym: These idiot "psychics" should be charged with wasting police time.

The cops can just ignore them. No time has to be wasted.
 
erewhon
2009-11-07 08:50:29 AM
What's scary is that cops LIKE this sort of thing. I have a friend in Huntsville that does this for police across the country. She's a sweet old lady, sort of barmy but nice, looks a lot like Tangina Barrons to add to the amusement. Police call her nonstop.

That always horrified me a little, on several levels.
 
OhioKnight
2009-11-07 08:57:03 AM
So the dude used tooth whitener Shawn, so what.

www.usanetwork.com

/Tim Omundson was totally staring down Maggie Lawson's blouse on the Psych panel at comicon.
 
farkeruk
2009-11-07 09:40:09 AM
"Detectives visited a dozen pubs called the Red Lion and Black Horse from Burry Port to Tregaron. They even visited the Feathers hotel in Aberaeron because there is a statue of a horse outside."

That explains it. If someone had tipped them off that the word "sewage plant" had been significant, they'd probably told them to fark off.
 
animalmagnet
2009-11-07 10:12:14 AM
I would think that the symptoms of being hanged and drinking bleach would be different enough that the average person would not get the two confused.
 
Curious [TotalFark]
2009-11-07 10:33:32 AM
i have had two close folks suicide and the families in both cases had a real hard time dealing with it. so the family looking for another reason for the death doesn't surprise me. that the police spent more than a few minutes on checking does however.
 
Antilope
2009-11-07 10:37:41 AM
The Flying Squad needs to have it's wings clipped.
 
SpaceLord
2009-11-07 11:17:37 AM
The best part about all this:

If it's regular, household bleach: It's really, hard to kill yourself with it. Bleach at that concentration isn't very toxic. Unless you throw it back up and manage to choke on your vomit. Or, if you're a drummer.
 
Dimensio [TotalFark]
2009-11-07 12:38:13 PM
animalmagnet: I would think that the symptoms of being hanged and drinking bleach would be different enough that the average person would not get the two confused.

While this is true, it should be noted that individuals who rely upon the information provided by self-proclaimed psychics are often very stupid.
 
mungo
2009-11-07 02:16:18 PM
The police should sue the Medium for fraud, since he/she were completely wrong (and were exploitiung the family's grief).

Utter scum
 
They_no_kill_BakBak
2009-11-07 05:15:34 PM
Antilope: The Flying Squad needs to have it's wings clipped.

Fly Thompsons Gazelle of the Yard?
 
Zero Exponent
2009-11-07 06:22:36 PM
Wait, how did they spend 20,000 pounds investigating this?

"Detectives visited a dozen pubs ..."

Oh,OK. Bleach, I mean Nevermind.

www.wchstv.com

Approves.
 
Neuticle
2009-11-08 12:46:23 AM
SpaceLord: The best part about all this:

If it's regular, household bleach: It's really, hard to kill yourself with it. Bleach at that concentration isn't very toxic. Unless you throw it back up and manage to choke on your vomit. Or, if you're a drummer.

I'm going to go out on a limb here and guess you do not have a degree in a chemistry or biology.

Household bleach is anywhere from 5-10% Sodium Hypochlorite and has a pH of around 12. That's pretty damn bad to swallow. Sure, a little tiny bit won't kill you, or probably even do much damage. If you drank a glass of it, you're going to fark your esophagus upside-down and sideways, and even though the stomach is tough as hell, probably do significant damage to it as well.

Chances of dying? With proper medical care, fairly low, but we're talking weeks of treatment and recovery. Without medical intervention, you'd most likely die a slow and painful death from an inability to swallow.
 
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