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(JSOnline) Fail Not news: PepsiCo secretary ignores papers from two locals who claimed they invented bottled water. Fark: Judge awards them $1.26 billion when the company no-shows in court   (jsonline.com) divider line 152
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8075 clicks; posted to Business » on 29 Oct 2009 at 3:20 AM   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»   |    Get this fabulous T-Shirt and impress the methane out of your friends! shirt it!



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2009-10-28 11:45:48 PM
Well if that isn't incentive to sue PepsiCo for something, I don't know what is.

/I invented..."artificial flavoring"
 
2009-10-28 11:51:42 PM
Anybody want to buy a used secretary? I hear she's available, and only made one little mistake during her career ;)
 
2009-10-28 11:56:04 PM
No amount of Aquafina is worth $1.26 billion.
 
2009-10-29 12:07:43 AM
It takes some mighty big douches at Pepsi to blame a single secretary for a billion dollar error. Why would a single secretary have that kind of power in the first place? 1) that's insane, B.) no farking way, and III.) that's nuts.
 
2009-10-29 12:55:57 AM
PepsiCo did not immediately respond to a Journal Sentinel request for comment, but company spokesman Joe Jacuzzi told the Associated Press the company feels it has been denied due process and wants the opportunity to defend itself, although it acknowledges an "internal process issue."

An "internal process issue" excuse would be laughed out of court if an individual person tried it.

The same should apply here, but unfortunately, the USA is a plutocracy, so PepsiCo will succeed.
 
2009-10-29 12:56:55 AM
Those are the two luckiest soon to be dead men in history..

//did i say dead? I mean..."mysterious disappearance"
 
2009-10-29 12:57:46 AM
AntiNorm: The same should apply here, but unfortunately, the USA is a plutocracy, so PepsiCo will succeed.

For 1.26 Billion, whatever you might think of large corporations, they deserve their day in court.
 
2009-10-29 12:58:06 AM
I invented water.

Seriously, I combined hydrogen and oxygen using a spark, and I got water! Where's my dough?
 
2009-10-29 12:59:58 AM
MacG: It takes some mighty big douches at Pepsi to blame a single secretary for a billion dollar error. Why would a single secretary have that kind of power in the first place? 1) that's insane, B.) no farking way, and III.) that's nuts.

Yeah I don't understand how one person had that much power and a secretary to boot.
 
2009-10-29 01:09:33 AM
No one invents Joan Crawford!

-commence random beatings.
 
2009-10-29 01:12:45 AM
Alacritous: For 1.26 Billion, whatever you might think of large corporations, they deserve their day in court.

This case centers around whether or not they were given that opportunity. The two locals are claiming that they had indeed been given the opportunity, but that they ignored it. If that's what happened, then tough shiat -- cough up the $1.26B. If it's not what happened, then of course they deserve their day in court.

(Of course, the truth usually ends up being somewhere in the middle.)
 
2009-10-29 01:15:35 AM
AntiNorm: The two locals are claiming that they had indeed been given the opportunity, but that they ignored it. If that's what happened, then tough shiat -- cough up the $1.26B.

Yes, because corporations are in the habit of just pissing away 1.26 BILLION dollars just like that..
 
2009-10-29 01:25:37 AM
brap: No one invents Joan Crawford!

I've heard that Joan Crawford has risen from the grave.
 
2009-10-29 01:35:22 AM
GAT_00: I've heard that Joan Crawford has risen from the grave.

No, I have it on good authority that they got her with a headshot from a silver bullet, then drove a wooden stake into her heart.
 
2009-10-29 01:36:05 AM
Liquids go into a bottle. Purified drinking water is a liquid. Takes a real farking genius to put those two together.
 
2009-10-29 01:37:35 AM
sarty: Well if that isn't incentive to sue PepsiCo for something, I don't know what is.

/I invented..."artificial flavoring"


I hate to ever say this, but over in one.
 
2009-10-29 01:45:20 AM
Alacritous: For 1.26 Billion, whatever you might think of large corporations, they deserve their day in court.

They had their day in court. They chose not to show up.
 
2009-10-29 01:48:27 AM
Alacritous: they deserve their day in court.

If it turns out they were served papers, then that's pretty much that. As long as it can be demonstrated the papers were served properly, it's Pepsi's fark up.
 
2009-10-29 01:53:46 AM
In other words, pepsi's legal team thought it was a frivolous suit that would be thrown out before it even hit the judge's desk, forgetting that you still have to show up to hear the judge laugh them out of court..

A show of arrogance at best.
 
2009-10-29 01:58:13 AM
kill them all

1) pepsi for getting caught with their pants down
2) the people who thought this was a trade secret/patentable idea
3) the judge for not throwing this out of court
4) the lawyers who saw this as a fun way to make money

/god I hate this kind of bullshti lawsuits
 
2009-10-29 01:58:15 AM
One of the reasons for PepsiCo's delayed response, according to court documents, was that a secretary in PepsiCo's legal department was so busy she did not tell anyone about a letter regarding the case or enter it into a log that tracks such matters.

Does this really sound right to anyone? I mean he's a legal secretary do you really just leave a lawsuit letter on your desk and forget about it? You have to sign for it when you get served. It's not like he confused it with junk mail and tossed it.

On top of that if your legal department is that slammed that the person can't take 10 minutes and route a letter to the proper authority you need to pay the $75,000 a year (or whatever) and hire another freaking secretary. It's a hell of a lot cheaper than $1.26 billion.
 
2009-10-29 01:58:48 AM
WhyteRaven74: Alacritous: they deserve their day in court.

If it turns out they were served papers, then that's pretty much that. As long as it can be demonstrated the papers were served properly, it's Pepsi's fark up.


That's really not the way it works if there's an excusable neglect defense shown and a potentially viable (meritorious) defense. Both are likely true here.

And if you don't believe this is exactly how mistakes get made by corporate counsel, would you like me to describe the unusual series of mistakes that led the CEO of Bank One (the current CEO of Chase), to be ordered to appear in a court (at my request) because someone would not give my client a car title and no one else would read the mail and prior court orders. (It got their attention. And yes, the CEO said I had a pair of "brass ones." God bless him.)
 
2009-10-29 02:05:44 AM
wejash: excusable neglect defense shown

And this is why I need to not hit add comment before I make sure I'm done writing and phrasing things right. I was going to add on if it was done right then it's Pepsi's job to show they have a legit excuse, they can't just come along going "We meant to show up! We really really did!".

would not give my client a car title

I've heard stories like that before :)
 
2009-10-29 03:20:03 AM
namatad: kill them all

1) pepsi for getting caught with their pants down
2) the people who thought this was a trade secret/patentable idea
3) the judge for not throwing this out of court
4) the lawyers who saw this as a fun way to make money

/god I hate this kind of bullshti lawsuits


So you know nothing specific about the case, but you are willing to kill everyone.

Nice.
 
2009-10-29 03:44:05 AM
Darth_Lukecash: namatad: kill them all

1) pepsi for getting caught with their pants down
2) the people who thought this was a trade secret/patentable idea
3) the judge for not throwing this out of court
4) the lawyers who saw this as a fun way to make money

/god I hate this kind of bullshti lawsuits

So you know nothing specific about the case, but you are willing to kill everyone.

Nice.


If knee jerking was not a figure of speech, half of Farker's would have metal knees by now.
 
2009-10-29 03:53:37 AM
I bet the Plaintiffs are Coke guys.


Good for them. Pepsi sucks.
 
2009-10-29 03:54:52 AM
I see what you legal types are saying, but I agree with AntiNorm. If I got served and then forgot to ever open and read the summons, there is no way I could get a second chance.

I gotta think the judge was just pissed at PepsiCo for not showing up, as this looks like a frivolous suit to me. I mean by 1981 didn't Perrier already sell bottled water?
 
2009-10-29 03:56:51 AM
BTW - am I the only one who laughed when they read the name Joe Jacuzzi?
 
2009-10-29 04:29:29 AM
Speedbts alt: I see what you legal types are saying, but I agree with AntiNorm. If I got served and then forgot to ever open and read the summons, there is no way I could get a second chance.

Well, when you serve a corp, who do you serve it to? The secretary of the legal department? The CEO? The receptionist? I'm sure there are legal guidelines here and they aren't being explained. I don't think any reasonable person can think it's acceptable to serve a secretary and have the corporation held liable for it.
 
2009-10-29 04:50:31 AM
bhcompy: Speedbts alt: I see what you legal types are saying, but I agree with AntiNorm. If I got served and then forgot to ever open and read the summons, there is no way I could get a second chance.

Well, when you serve a corp, who do you serve it to? The secretary of the legal department? The CEO? The receptionist? I'm sure there are legal guidelines here and they aren't being explained. I don't think any reasonable person can think it's acceptable to serve a secretary and have the corporation held liable for it.


Anyone authorized to sign for the company. A secretary in the legal department could very well have that power, and would probalby the obvious place to start the inquiry as to who to deliver to.

Here's what might have gone down:

The summons was probalby addressed to the head of the legal department, who would be authorized to sign for it. The secretary could be authorized by pepsi to accept legal deliveries for him. Hence, secretary accepts it, and under most circumstances puts it in the database where it would be assigned to somebody in the legal department who looks at the case and shows up in court to defend against it. Secretary gets several phone calls after delivery, other matters come up, summons gets left on desk, possibly buried under other things. Gets rediscovered later, secretary thinks it's been entered in the system already and the person assigned got the filings from another source. Nobody shows up to court, judge awards full amount as pepsi does not show up. Court orders are served in the form of a bill for 1.26 billion.

Not a totally unreasonable scenario.
 
2009-10-29 04:51:46 AM
Take it out of her paycheck.
 
2009-10-29 05:40:02 AM
Yeah, blame the lowly secretary. Its all her/his fault. Give me a break.

One thing I noticed having worked at the bottom of the totem poll and the near the top is the lower you are, the more shiat rolls down on you.

I have sat in executive meetings where they make major screw ups and cover their tracks, I was in one meeting were the Vice President was whispering to my partner and I saying, "Don't tell anyone this." We were both thinking, why is she telling us this?

When I was a admin asst. I had to actually go to a client's business and demand a check from the President/Owner of the company, because the higher ups didn't have the balls to do it themselves. (the client refused to pay because we created a cruddy product, which I am on the side of the client). Then get chewed out by my schmo of a boss because the checks were post dated and didn't check for that while I was there.

So blaming it on the lowly secretary is a lame excuse.
 
2009-10-29 05:45:24 AM
I invented drinking. Ok, did not invent it, but I HAVE perfected it.
 
2009-10-29 06:35:47 AM
Speedbts alt: BTW - am I the only one who laughed when they read the name Joe Jacuzzi?

Wasn't that one of Snoopy's aliases?
 
2009-10-29 06:37:44 AM
Yeah screw Pepsi, I'm sure they'll deduct that from the CEO's paycheck for a few decades... oh no wait, no they won't - it will come right out of the company which will either:

a) Screw the employees out of raises and benefits
b) Screw the shareholders out of dividends
c) Screw all of us because they need to recover that cash through the sales of their product
d) all of the above.

Yeah, definitely screw Pepsi and award two people more than a billion dollars because they invented the idea of putting something in a container.
 
2009-10-29 06:39:06 AM
Hoopy Frood: Speedbts alt: BTW - am I the only one who laughed when they read the name Joe Jacuzzi?

Wasn't that one of Snoopy's aliases?


Joe COOL (new window)
 
2009-10-29 06:42:29 AM
Fizpez: Yeah screw Pepsi, I'm sure they'll deduct that from the CEO's paycheck for a few decades... oh no wait, no they won't - it will come right out of the company which will either:

a) Screw the employees out of raises and benefits
b) Screw the shareholders out of dividends
c) Screw all of us because they need to recover that cash through the sales of their product
d) all of the above.

Yeah, definitely screw Pepsi and award two people more than a billion dollars because they invented the idea of putting something in a container.


About that screwing consumers part.

Yeah, won't happen. That industry is actually competitive. While talking about healthcare so much, we tend to forget that not all industries can jack up prices unilaterally.

I do suspect they'll be able to appeal this somehow though. It is a rather stupid case.
 
2009-10-29 07:04:25 AM
Alacritous: AntiNorm: The same should apply here, but unfortunately, the USA is a plutocracy, so PepsiCo will succeed.

For 1.26 Billion, whatever you might think of large corporations, they deserve their day in court.



Or running naked through the streets, chased by an angry mob with blowtorches and Vise-Grips.
 
2009-10-29 07:32:06 AM
AppleOptionEsc: Darth_Lukecash: namatad: kill them all

1) pepsi for getting caught with their pants down
2) the people who thought this was a trade secret/patentable idea
3) the judge for not throwing this out of court
4) the lawyers who saw this as a fun way to make money

/god I hate this kind of bullshti lawsuits

So you know nothing specific about the case, but you are willing to kill everyone.

Nice.

If knee jerking was not a figure of speech, half of Farker's would have metal knees by now.


That's way below my standards.
 
2009-10-29 07:35:46 AM
plywoodjungle: I invented drinking. Ok, did not invent it, but I HAVE perfected it.

Nah, you just perfected wrapping those luscious lips around round objects anywhere from 1"-3" in diameter and drawing a highly viscous fluid.
 
2009-10-29 07:57:05 AM
How is that Obama logo working out for you?
 
2009-10-29 08:14:55 AM
Speedbts alt: 1981 didn't Perrier already sell bottled water?

Never been to Europe? Bottled water (including Perrier) was around for a long time before it became a fashion accessory. And in Europe, the tap water usually isn't all that good, considering there's a really good chance that there's a factory upstream of you, and a certainty approaching unity that someone upstream of you is dumping their sewage in the water.
 
2009-10-29 08:17:45 AM
Speedbts alt: BTW - am I the only one who laughed when they read the name Joe Jacuzzi?

img265.imageshack.us

Trust me, Your Honor, a secretary lost it.

/Nice to see he's working again.
 
2009-10-29 08:19:51 AM
Speedbts alt: I see what you legal types are saying, but I agree with AntiNorm. If I got served and then forgot to ever open and read the summons, there is no way I could get a second chance.

I gotta think the judge was just pissed at PepsiCo for not showing up, as this looks like a frivolous suit to me. I mean by 1981 didn't Perrier already sell bottled water?


That depends on a couple of factors. Mainly the process of bottleing the water and how the product was refered to in those papers. If the two guys who proposed it called their water Aquafina in their non-disclouser agreement or described a specific way to process the water that Pepsi is useing then yeah they have a case.

Haveing toured a water bottleing plant at one time you would be surprised at the amount of manufactureing that goes into bottled water or the variance in the processes that can be used.
 
2009-10-29 08:20:42 AM
It's a default judgment. It's beyond me why Antinorm et al. think they're an indefeatable entitlement to cash (I can only assume ignorance plays a major role.) These things get tossed out all the time. At least around here, we advise clients to consent to setting aside default judgments immediately when the other side gets its act together. The courts simply won't uphold them if the defendant actually does show up and it's not shockingly after the fact, and if you oppose you get a costs award against you for behaving unreasonably.

Default judgments are easy to get. File a lawsuit. Don't properly serve the opposing side. Show up in court and claim you properly served them, and they've missed deadlines. Tad-daa! You just were awarded a billion dollars. And for the record, it's very rare where sending a letter constitutes proper service. The fact that Pepsi screwed up an internal process doesn't mean the service was proper. Usually giving things to a secretary doesn't count - management of the an office is the absolute minimum.

In fact, if the two "winners" swore in court that they properly served the documents, and didn't, they might just get sanctioned by the judge for wasting court time.

So, as much as it sounds like a great news story about the little guy winning, it's not. This nothing beyond two clowns screwing up in the legal system, we just haven't got to the part where they get hammered for it yet.

/Shocked, SHOCKED that an article about legal proceedings leaves out important and easily available information
 
2009-10-29 08:23:36 AM
Slaves2Darkness: Haveing toured a water bottleing plant at one time you would be surprised at the amount of manufactureing that goes into bottled water or the variance in the processes that can be used.

Holding the bottles up to a kitchen sink vs. dipping them in the toilet reservoir vs. dunking them in the bathtub?
 
2009-10-29 08:33:41 AM
Alacritous: For 1.26 Billion, whatever you might think of large corporations, they deserve their day in court.

They had their opportunity for a day in court. PepsiCo farked up and didn't show.
 
2009-10-29 08:34:43 AM
pandabear: Speedbts alt: 1981 didn't Perrier already sell bottled water?

Never been to Europe? Bottled water (including Perrier) was around for a long time before it became a fashion accessory. And in Europe, the tap water usually isn't all that good, considering there's a really good chance that there's a factory upstream of you, and a certainty approaching unity that someone upstream of you is dumping their sewage in the water.


img442.imageshack.us

They piss in the river upstream of our village.
 
2009-10-29 08:35:17 AM
RoxtarRyan: Slaves2Darkness: Haveing toured a water bottleing plant at one time you would be surprised at the amount of manufactureing that goes into bottled water or the variance in the processes that can be used.

Holding the bottles up to a kitchen sink vs. dipping them in the toilet reservoir vs. dunking them in the bathtub?


More likely filtering followed by reverse osmosis, leaving nearly-lab-grade deionized water. Then they put a little (or a lot, depends on the recipe) of the minerals back in as additives (DI/distilled water tastes horrible) and bottle the result.
 
2009-10-29 08:38:41 AM
Nemo's Brother: How is that Obama logo working out for you?

Your paranoid obsession is showing.
 
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