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(The Monster Under The Bed) Scary Awesome ad free slideshow of horror photography by Joshua Hoffine. Warning: not suitable for everyone. Bonus: slideshow all on one page   (joshuahoffine.com) divider line 85
More: Scary  
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24155 clicks; posted to Main » on 14 Oct 2009 at 10:57 PM   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»   |    Get this fabulous T-Shirt and impress the methane out of your friends! shirt it!



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2009-10-14 11:00:23 PM
All I have to say is "seen one before, one of those is IT and this guys a pedo in another one"

you farkers know what I"m talking about.
 
2009-10-14 11:01:31 PM
20 clicks in and its Farked already?
 
2009-10-14 11:02:17 PM
Never mind. Loaded after 4 F5's :)
 
2009-10-14 11:03:09 PM
I think some of those are fake.
 
2009-10-14 11:03:25 PM
Child pron?
 
2009-10-14 11:03:26 PM
well somebody likes to scare the shiat outta kids

/builds character i tell you
 
2009-10-14 11:04:19 PM
These horror pictures rate on the scale between "Cardboard ghost saying 'Boo!'" and "drunken uncle arguing with the answering machine".

Meh.
 
2009-10-14 11:04:56 PM
Drizzit: well somebody likes to scare the shiat outta kids

/builds character i tell you


Just as long as it doesn't have one of those horrors from Where the Wild Things Are! That would be intolerable.
 
2009-10-14 11:05:40 PM
I laughed when I saw the baby with the snake.
 
2009-10-14 11:06:39 PM
Boys and girls of every age
Wouldn't you like to see something strange?
Come with us and you will see
This, our town of Halloween


This is Halloween, this is Halloween
Pumpkins scream in the dead of night
This is Halloween, everybody make a scene
Trick or treat till the neighbors gonna die of fright

It's our town, everybody screm
In this town of Halloween

I am the one hiding under your bed
Teeth ground sharp and eyes glowing red
I am the one hiding under yours stairs
Fingers like snakes and spiders in my hair

This is Halloween, this is Halloween

Halloween! Halloween! Halloween! Halloween!
In this town we call home
Everyone hail to the pumpkin song

In this town, don't we love it now?
Everybody's waiting for the next surprise
Round that corner, man hiding in the trash cam
Something's waiting now to pounce, and how you'll...


Scream! This is Halloween
Red 'n' black, slimy green
Aren't you scared?
Well, that's just fine
Say it once, say it twice
Take a chance and roll the dice
Ride with the moon in the dead of night

Everybody scream, everbody scream
In our town of Halloween!


I am the clown with the tear-away face
Here in a flash and gone without a trace
I am the "who" when you call, "Who's there?"
I am the wind blowing through your hair
I am the shadow on the moon at night
Filling your dreams to the brim with fright


This is Halloween, this is Halloween
Halloween! Halloween! Halloween! Halloween!
Halloween! Halloween!


Tender Lumplings everywhere
Life's no fun without a good scare
That's our job, but we're not mean
In our town of Halloween

In this town
Don't we love it now?
Everybody's waiting for the next surprise!
Skeleton Jack might catch you in the back
And scream like a banshee
Make you jump out of your skin
This is Halloween, everyone scream
Wont' ya please make way for a very special guy

Our man jack is King of the Pumpkin patch
Everyone hail to the Pumpkin King

This is Halloween, this is Halloween
Halloween! Halloween! Halloween! Halloween!

In this town we call home
Everyone hail to the pumpkin song

La la-la la, Halloween! Halloween!
La la-la la, Halloween! Halloween!
La la-la la, Halloween! Halloween!
La la-la la, Halloween! Halloween!
Wheeeee!!!
 
2009-10-14 11:07:53 PM
Those were neither awesome or scary.
 
2009-10-14 11:10:16 PM
Hand Banana: Those were neither awesome or scary.

I feel kinda bad, though. A lot of those look like he had to go through tons of trouble to dress up the models and set up props. And then the 5 minutes or so of C- Photoshop skills.
 
2009-10-14 11:10:55 PM
img200.imageshack.us
 
2009-10-14 11:13:26 PM
I actually LOL'd at number 13.
 
2009-10-14 11:15:45 PM
Yeah......
Link takes way better pics than that and atleast his actually exsist.
 
2009-10-14 11:17:01 PM
So. Failed attempt at "Lookit me! I'm an edgy artist?".

Meh.
 
2009-10-14 11:18:03 PM
S10Calade: Yeah......
Link takes way better pics than that and atleast his actually exsist.


Dammitdammitdammitdammitdammit!
I get a fail for farking that up.
was trying to link to this Link (new window)
 
2009-10-14 11:18:10 PM
Why is Roman Polanski hiding beneath that staircase?
 
2009-10-14 11:18:37 PM
UltimaCS: Hand Banana: Those were neither awesome or scary.

I feel kinda bad, though. A lot of those look like he had to go through tons of trouble to dress up the models and set up props. And then the 5 minutes or so of C- Photoshop skills.


i161.photobucket.com

Hyperbole.
 
2009-10-14 11:20:16 PM
Not impressed.

/Wayne Barlowe
//Barlowe's Inferno
 
2009-10-14 11:21:46 PM
img1.liveinternet.ru
 
2009-10-14 11:23:56 PM
bah, better art with felt:

heres one...GIS Adam Parker Smith if you like

www.priskajuschkafineart.com
 
2009-10-14 11:24:12 PM
meh
 
2009-10-14 11:27:06 PM
Who are those 2 kids? The photographer's? What idiot would let his kids pose in these pics?
 
2009-10-14 11:28:39 PM
ferfer72: What idiot would let his kids pose in these pics?

...I assume you're talking about the topless one? My babysitter decided to keep me busy with "Chuckie" and "Dolls". Parent's reaction? "It builds character".

And now I post on Fark.
 
2009-10-14 11:33:20 PM
Drizzit: well somebody likes to scare the shiat outta kids

/builds character i tell you


Most of those are composites. The kids eyes give it away, they look like they are laughing.
 
2009-10-14 11:33:58 PM
meat0918: Drizzit: well somebody likes to scare the shiat outta kids

/builds character i tell you

Most of those are composites. The kids eyes give it away, they look like they are laughing.


Except the crying baby and the snake. Still a composite it looks like, but the baby really is crying.
 
2009-10-14 11:34:02 PM
Some of them were cool photos, most of them were meh, though.
 
2009-10-14 11:34:05 PM
I know the cool thing to do in this thread is talk about how this guy's work is lame or that they pictures aren't scary in the slightest but instead, I'll go with "Hey, I already saw most of these from a link in a Fark discussion at least 2 years ago and everyone was saying how freaky and creepy they were, this is old news."

The cute little baby being held by the zombie woman is a bit disturbing though.
 
2009-10-14 11:34:06 PM
Wow, that last one is actually pretty disturbing.

Great pics.
 
2009-10-14 11:34:07 PM
LOL
 
2009-10-14 11:35:54 PM
Majin_Buu: everybody screm

excuse me?
 
2009-10-14 11:36:48 PM
UltimaCS: ferfer72: What idiot would let his kids pose in these pics?

...I assume you're talking about the topless one? My babysitter decided to keep me busy with "Chuckie" and "Dolls". Parent's reaction? "It builds character".

And now I post on Fark.


Yeah. I remember pretty much exactly when the decline started. I used to have that tonka dump truck....the classic one we all had. It was metal, had sharp edges and I even cut my foot when I stepped on it once. Then one year, my mom bought me the front-loader to go with it...and it was plastic! I had a cap gun once that looked like an oversized pistol. It had batteries and the caps were on this loooooong string, and the motor fed through the caps, so when you pulled the trigger it was like an automatic pistol...I once decided to make the caps more exciting so i put to strings through at the same time...the thing blew up in my hand. Not an explosion of course, but but my hand got slightly burned and the gun was broken.

Before you 'cool story, bro' me, yeah I was alive from the transition where we became pussified. Patton Oswalt explains why and what happened....all the cool hippie parents in thr 70s had kids, let their kids have lots of sex and smoke weed with them and they grew up to be uncool squares.

Then they became the people to put parental labels on everything.
 
2009-10-14 11:37:06 PM
FunkOut
Thus.
Er, I mean: This.
 
2009-10-14 11:40:33 PM
SkySnake: Wow, that last one is actually pretty disturbing HOT.

Great pics.

FTFY
 
2009-10-14 11:41:15 PM
FunkOut: I know the cool thing to do in this thread is talk about how this guy's work is lame or that they pictures aren't scary in the slightest but instead, I'll go with "Hey, I already saw most of these from a link in a Fark discussion at least 2 years ago and everyone was saying how freaky and creepy they were, this is old news."

The cute little baby being held by the zombie woman is a bit disturbing though.


Yep.

The last one is new though. Looks like what Mappelthorpe would have done if he was a lesbian torture-porn photographer.
 
2009-10-14 11:42:03 PM
I'm pretty sure I saw that girl in the closet mirror pic with pedobear coming out of the closet.
 
2009-10-14 11:47:13 PM
unawesome
 
2009-10-14 11:48:47 PM
UltimaCS: ferfer72: What idiot would let his kids pose in these pics?

...I assume you're talking about the topless one? My babysitter decided to keep me busy with "Chuckie" and "Dolls". Parent's reaction? "It builds character".

And now I post on Fark.


I watched Chuckie as a kid. Afterward my stepfather made a tape saying "Hi I'm chuckie wanna play?" and put that in my Dozzy doll (like teddy ruxpin) Needless to say I was scared half to death when I pushed Dozzy's hand that night. Looking back I think it is hilarious.
 
2009-10-14 11:48:50 PM
Repeat from about 3 years ago.
 
2009-10-14 11:51:02 PM
Wow, some of you guys have balls of steel because many of those pieces were disturbing.

I loved the werewolf coming down the staircase with the little girl screaming in the corner. It took me a moment to register that it was a human hand and not a paw reaching out for her.

Plus, you can never go wrong with the Elizabeth Bathory shower. Though you should see the jacuzzi.
 
2009-10-14 11:56:20 PM
heh, well I'm glad they were repeated tonight.

I found them to be a lot more tasteful and better presented than most "horror photos" I've seen.

I've always felt that realism is much less important than imagination and composition when creating something genuinely creepy. This guy has a good eye and a vivid imagination.

a few of those gave me the shivers... and that last one is just beautiful.
 
2009-10-14 11:59:20 PM
NeuroticRocker: UltimaCS: ferfer72: What idiot would let his kids pose in these pics?

...I assume you're talking about the topless one? My babysitter decided to keep me busy with "Chuckie" and "Dolls". Parent's reaction? "It builds character".

And now I post on Fark.

Yeah. I remember pretty much exactly when the decline started. I used to have that tonka dump truck....the classic one we all had. It was metal, had sharp edges and I even cut my foot when I stepped on it once. Then one year, my mom bought me the front-loader to go with it...and it was plastic! I had a cap gun once that looked like an oversized pistol. It had batteries and the caps were on this loooooong string, and the motor fed through the caps, so when you pulled the trigger it was like an automatic pistol...I once decided to make the caps more exciting so i put to strings through at the same time...the thing blew up in my hand. Not an explosion of course, but but my hand got slightly burned and the gun was broken.

Before you 'cool story, bro' me, yeah I was alive from the transition where we became pussified. Patton Oswalt explains why and what happened....all the cool hippie parents in thr 70s had kids, let their kids have lots of sex and smoke weed with them and they grew up to be uncool squares.

Then they became the people to put parental labels on everything.


We kept our (original, metal, from the '50s) Tonka trucks under the skull tree. Great security system -- what kid (besides my brother and I) would be willing to crawl past a dozen skulls in various stages of decomposition just to steal a Tonka truck?
 
2009-10-15 12:04:15 AM
Photoshop and borderline child porn..YEAH thanks a lot subby. Not scary and NOT AT ALL ARTISTIC-it's one of those peeps who think they are artistic but watched to many Marilyn Manson videos.
 
2009-10-15 12:06:11 AM
After seeing so many real life gory pics/videos on the net in my life, this doesn't really look like much.
 
2009-10-15 12:11:32 AM
For the "old post" haters - it's the dude's portfolio, so yes, it's going to contain a mix of old and new work. If you had any idea of what you were looking at, you might know that.

For the "it's 'shopped" haters - read the
blog.

For the "not-scary/sucks" haters - I love Barlowe and creepy/dilapidated environment photography too, but neither are horror photography. If you want to make a good counterpoint, try digging up some competent stuff on Deviant Art.
 
2009-10-15 12:17:16 AM
I think I saw these (on a different site) last halloween on fark...
 
2009-10-15 12:18:37 AM
Although I don't find them particularly scary, I do like them.
My favorites are the ones where the humans haven't noticed the others in the scene.. yet.
 
2009-10-15 12:19:50 AM
Waits for someone to photoshop the pedobear in these photos in 3,2,1...
 
2009-10-15 12:26:45 AM
Nayest: Not impressed.

/Wayne Barlowe
//Barlowe's Inferno


Cool, I like Barlowe's stuff. He seems to have the biological stuff right at an instinctual level. His creatures/aliens are totally believeable.

That's probably why his demons are so creepy.
 
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