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(Scotsman)   $8 bounty placed on live hedgehogs. Richard Gere considers transitioning from hamsters   (thescotsman.co.uk) divider line 64
    More: Spiffy  
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2983 clicks; posted to Main » on 10 Mar 2003 at 10:46 PM (12 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



64 Comments   (+0 »)
   

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2003-03-10 08:46:23 PM  
Gerbils.
 
2003-03-10 10:49:21 PM  
Sonic surren...sorry.
 
2003-03-10 10:50:33 PM  
A hedgehog is not something a person would want up their ass.
 
2003-03-10 10:50:40 PM  
Can someone explain to me where the Richard Gere / gerbil link got started?
 
2003-03-10 10:50:55 PM  
what's this constant cliche of gere and hamsters?

Don't get it.
 
2003-03-10 10:51:18 PM  
Not even a well-behaved one.
 
2003-03-10 10:52:08 PM  
Gerbils... not hamsters
 
Rat [TotalFark]
2003-03-10 10:54:38 PM  
GIS 'hedgehog'



looks like too much work for me...
 
Rat [TotalFark]
2003-03-10 10:55:17 PM  
(close tags, schmuck)
 
2003-03-10 10:56:56 PM  
Catching hedgehogs sounds like fun, though.

Dinsdale! Dinsdale!
 
2003-03-10 10:57:16 PM  
Scientists announce hedgehogs same as gerbils, only bigger.

Gere considers asshole enlargement.
 
2003-03-10 10:59:28 PM  
Oh yes....This makes a lot of ecological sense. Kneejerk animal rights people are so funny. How many of these captured and transplanted animals will die b/c of competition with animals already on mainland. (folks, ecological niches are usually occupied). How many will die of stress of capture? How many will starve because thay can't find food, or ripped apart by predators enjoying the increased availability of hedgehogs?

Cull away, I say.
 
Rat [TotalFark]
2003-03-10 10:59:37 PM  
[image from 216.136.200.194 too old to be available]

/unfetch this, filter freakboy
 
2003-03-10 10:59:40 PM  
Yeah where did that Richard Gere thing come from? Anyone?
 
2003-03-10 11:02:30 PM  
Sonic could not be reached for comment.
[image from sonic.org too old to be available]
Hopefully fark allows .png....
 
2003-03-10 11:05:04 PM  
Blackmenace

Oh yes....This makes a lot of ecological sense. Kneejerk animal rights people are so funny. How many of these captured and transplanted animals will die b/c of competition with animals already on mainland. (folks, ecological niches are usually occupied). How many will die of stress of capture? How many will starve because thay can't find food, or ripped apart by predators enjoying the increased availability of hedgehogs?

Cull away, I say.


Lighten up, Francis.

Either they transport them to the mainland or they kill them on the spot. They are trying to save as many as they can.
 
2003-03-10 11:05:16 PM  
I say its publicity for the new sonic adventure dx for gba
 
2003-03-10 11:09:51 PM  
Mmmmmmmmm ... pointy.
 
2003-03-10 11:13:45 PM  
"...with a snail if you slow to a crawl, but the hedgehog can never be buggered at all!"

A pint of self-consuming Godiva ice cream to anyone that gets the reference.
 
2003-03-10 11:15:05 PM  
Lemmiwinks, run! The hedgehog won't sate him for long.
 
2003-03-10 11:17:39 PM  
Bestiality sure is a fun thing to do
But I have to say this as a warning to you:
With almost all animals, you can have ball
But the hedgehog can never be buggered at all.

Mmmmmmm .... Self-consuming
 
2003-03-10 11:22:33 PM  
Lets Talk Dirty To The Animals

a rooster says good morning
with a cock a doodle doo
a horses neigh is just his way
of saying how are you
a lion growls hello
and owls ask why and where and who
may i suggest
you get undressed
and show them your wazzoo
oh..........
the animals
the animals
lets talk dirty to the animals
f_ck you
mr.bunny
eat sh_t
mr. bear
if they dont love it
they can shove it
frankly i dont care oh...
the animals
the animals
lets talk dirty to the animals
up yours mr. hippo
piss off mr. fox
go tell a chicken to suck my d_ck and
give him chicken pox
oh the animals
the animals
lets talk dirty to the animals
from birds in the tree tops
to snakes in the grass
*BUT*
never tell an alligator
bite my
*NO*
never tell an alligator
*YES*
never tell an alligator
biiiite my SNITCH!
 
2003-03-10 11:25:15 PM  
Okay, some people want to contribute money to save a batch of hedgehogs.

They get some hedgehogs to coo over and a warm feeling, presumably.

Some locals get a few pounds. Possibly some manage to gather some dozens or hundreds of hedgehogs, if they are enterprising and hedgehog-wise, and make out even better.

And the Scottish National Heritage agency or whatever that wants to exterminate them wouldn't have to go to the trouble and expense of removing as many.

Seems like an ideal situation for all concerned. Odd that the Heritage ministry or whatever seems to want to obstruct the idea.
 
2003-03-10 11:28:42 PM  
I shall join in and ask: Where/How did the Gere/gerbil thing get started? Inquiring minds want to know!
 
2003-03-10 11:28:54 PM  
Hmm what happened to the article that was on top of Fark a few seconds ago, the one about some photos of some secret base location?.....
 
2003-03-10 11:29:03 PM  
I'm surprised that St. Tiggywinkles isn't involved. This is quaint wildlife hospital in the U.K. I visited last year on holiday that specializes in hedgehogs.

At least they would know about proper transport and introducing a hedgehog into the wild.

Some hedgehog aficionado
 
2003-03-10 11:29:34 PM  
It was a duct tape promotional campaign gone terribly wrong, PP.
 
2003-03-10 11:29:52 PM  
Ain't freedom of speech fun ;)
 
2003-03-10 11:31:42 PM  
I noticed the missing article, too. Seems to be a conspiracy surrounding it...
 
2003-03-10 11:31:45 PM  
grrrrrrrrrr

try again
 
2003-03-10 11:32:34 PM  
Here's a hedgehog for your enjoyment:
[image from oaklandzoo.org too old to be available]

Cute lil buggers, ain't they?

Now you'll excuse me, there's someone knocking on my door...And I can see some men in camo outside my window...Odd.

/goodbye cruel world
 
2003-03-10 11:33:01 PM  
/hedgehog
 
2003-03-10 11:33:59 PM  
In case you're curious about the Richard Gere urban myth, here's what snopes.com has to say about it. (Sorry for the long post!)

Contrary to widespread public belief, "gerbil-stuffing" is unknown as an actual sexual practice, nor has a verified medical case of a gerbil (or other rodent) having been extracted from a patient's rectum ever been reported. (Despite the assiduousness with which doctors record unusual items removed from patients' rectums in order to write them up as illustrative cases , a medical journal article involving a gerbil removal has yet to surface.) The notion of gerbilling (not necessarily restricted to homosexuals -- the insertion of items into the rectum for purposes of autoeroticism is practiced by heterosexuals as well) appears to be pure invention, a tale fabricated to demonstrate the depravity with which "faggots" allegedly pursue sexual pleasure.

Like similar legends such as The Promiscuous Rock Star, this tale has been applied to various public figures who are known or believed to be homosexual, and it has stuck with one in particular: Richard Gere. Although the legend homed in on various targets when it first appeared (including a Philadelphia newscaster), it has clung tenaciously to Mr. Gere's name since at least the mid-1980s. Rumors that he had an emergency "gerbilectomy" at Cedars-Sinai Hospital in California have spread far and wide, and countless doctors and nurses claim to have participated in, been on hand during, or heard from a reliable colleague about, the procedure. (Cedars-Sinai is apparently the best-staffed hospital in the world, since several hundred different doctors and nurses were reportedly on duty at the time Mr. Gere was allegedly brought in for treatment.) The rumor's spread was aided by an anonymous prankster who, not long after the film Pretty Woman led to a tremendous increase in Gere's popularity, flooded fax machines in Hollywood with a phony "press release" purportedly issued by the Association for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals, claiming that Gere had "abused" a gerbil. But, as a reporter from The National Enquirer found when he attempted to track down the gerbil story, there were no facts to be had.

Versions of the following gerbilling fiction date back at least to 1993 when a faked United Press International item appeared on the Internet, one that named Vito Bustone and Kiki Rodriguez of Lake City, Florida, as the accident victims. (The gerbil's name was withheld by request of the family.) Other versions have been falsely attributed to the Los Angeles Times with the events said to have taken place in Salt Lake City, Utah. Rest assured that neither news outlet ever published a news article about these fictitious events.
 
2003-03-10 11:35:22 PM  
try this again..

/hedgehog
 
2003-03-10 11:37:30 PM  
Damn, sorry Slepygryhnd, apparently I suck.
 
2003-03-10 11:39:51 PM  
did anyone actually see what the article said?
 
2003-03-10 11:41:31 PM  
Hedgehog A'la Orange

Ingrediants
1 good sized hedgehog, 1 fresh orange,rice and any drink.

1,skin and gut hedgehog,wash thoroughly.

2,place in pre-heated oven then reduce heat to moderate.

3,roast hedgehog for 15 minutes per pound plus an additional 15 minutes.

4,prick skin after first 30 minutes so the fat can run out and crisp the skin.

5,garnish with slices of orange,serve with rice.vegetables and a long drink.
 
2003-03-10 11:43:18 PM  
Oh and props to Slepygryhnd for using handy-dandy HTML.
 
2003-03-10 11:44:14 PM  
[image from pigdog.org too old to be available]
^ hedgehog?
 
2003-03-10 11:45:10 PM  
BlueMeanie: Thank you, but I have to admit that Slepygryhnd was the Weeners the snopes Gere story in this thread.

My parents have met Richard Gere. Apparently, he's a very nice, sensitive Buddhist. The urban legend is fun and all, but it must suck for the poor guy. Ok, maybe calling him 'poor guy' is going a little far, as he doubtless goes to sleep in a mattress full of money, but still.
 
2003-03-10 11:45:29 PM  
*fap,fap,fap,fap*
 
2003-03-10 11:45:55 PM  
It's a trap. The real destination for the hedgehogs is Iraq, where they will be dropped in by parachute. Each hedgehog will come with a recipe, premeasured spice packet, and a list of side items that compliment the main course.
 
2003-03-10 11:47:12 PM  
Solzhenisin--

Thanks for the nightmares, man!

/goes to gauge eyes out
 
2003-03-10 11:47:58 PM  
"gouge", maybe. grrr.
 
2003-03-10 11:48:00 PM  
I'm not sure what I said that prompted the filter to turn it to "Weiners" in my second to last post, but frankly, I love it.
 
2003-03-11 12:05:29 AM  
Dinsdale? DINSDALE!
 
2003-03-11 12:15:32 AM  
bounty eh? I'm sure these guys will round up those hedgehogs real quick:

[image from animetempy.com too old to be available]

[image from cartoonparty.net too old to be available]

I hope the html and the hosts play...
 
2003-03-11 12:16:58 AM  
Versions of the following gerbilling fiction date back at least to 1993 when a faked United Press International item appeared on the Internet, one that named Vito Bustone and Kiki Rodriguez of Lake City, Florida, as the accident victims.

I first heard this tale in 1989, in Gainesville, FL. Except I heard it was a Jacksonville weatherman.

Haha, the gerbil story may have originated in Florida, what a surprise.
 
2003-03-11 12:18:13 AM  
Ooooh, Cowboy Bebop rocks!!

And that is a cool pic (the b&w one). Mmm...anime.
 
2003-03-11 12:19:24 AM  
Hurry home Lemmiewinks, or you will soon be dead.
[image from 216.136.200.194 too old to be available]
 
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