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(News.com.au)   Remember to always tip your pizza delivery man or he might hold your son for ransom   (news.com.au) divider line 68
    More: Strange, delivery man, skips, site map, payments, vouchers, brisbane, son ransom, snow  
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5680 clicks; posted to Main » on 09 Sep 2009 at 6:58 PM (5 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2009-09-09 05:33:47 PM  
I'm not some bad-ass but if someone grabbed my kid over a pizza, he'd be an ex-pizza man.
 
2009-09-09 05:51:25 PM  
www.ntnews.com.au
 
2009-09-09 05:59:10 PM  
GIMME BACK MY SON!!!

And some extra napkins and packets of crushed peppers.
 
2009-09-09 06:09:11 PM  
She should have just let him keep the kid, good pizza is worth far more than a child.
 
2009-09-09 06:16:30 PM  
Cindy Paardekooper, 30, claims the driver from Pizza King

Well, there's your problem right there.

Those pizza monarchies have been known to go mad with power.
 
2009-09-09 06:59:08 PM  
Did they order from Alfredo's Pizza Kitchen? Or Pizza By Alfredo?

This is important.
 
2009-09-09 07:00:15 PM  
I'd like a cheese pizza with a side of WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALT!

/He's. GOT. my. Son!
 
2009-09-09 07:01:19 PM  
Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: Cindy Paardekooper, 30, claims the driver from Pizza King

Well, there's your problem right there.

Those pizza monarchies have been known to go mad with power.


I've heard scattered reports that the nefarious Burger King is secretly training and arming rebels from the McDonaldland province of Grimacestan.
 
2009-09-09 07:02:02 PM  
Obviously, the child's brother, Abel, should have been watching better, he's his brother's keeper after all.
 
2009-09-09 07:02:51 PM  
Pope Michael of Discordia: I'm not some bad-ass but if someone grabbed my kid over a pizza, he'd be an ex-pizza man.

Or

Pope Michael of Discordia: I'm not some bad-ass but if someone grabbed my kid over a pizza, he'd be an ex-pizza man.

Either way, FTFY.
 
2009-09-09 07:03:03 PM  
Aarontology: I've heard scattered reports that the nefarious Burger King is secretly training and arming rebels from the McDonaldland province of Grimacestan.


All we can do now is hold our breath until Little Caesar's empire makes its move...
 
2009-09-09 07:03:07 PM  
Snow Crash?
 
2009-09-09 07:05:45 PM  
The Bilge Rat: Snow Crash?

I don't think Uncle Enzo would tolerate that kind of treatment of his customers, not to mention the pizza being that late.
 
2009-09-09 07:07:14 PM  
JesseL: The Bilge Rat: Snow Crash?

I don't think Uncle Enzo would tolerate that kind of treatment of his customers, not to mention the pizza being that late.


I concur.
 
2009-09-09 07:07:28 PM  
Megain
Why is that kid in jail?
 
2009-09-09 07:09:56 PM  
Quasar: Did they order from Alfredo's Pizza Kitchen? Or Pizza By Alfredo?

This is important.


Came for the Office reference. Leaving now.
 
2009-09-09 07:10:35 PM  
Quasar: Did they order from Alfredo's Pizza Kitchen? Or Pizza By Alfredo?

This is important.


I hope it wasn't Pizza By Alfredo. It's like eating a hot circle of garbage.
 
2009-09-09 07:10:42 PM  
drjekel_mrhyde: Megain
Why is that kid in jail?


He's not... at least not yet. It's Uncle Joey getting used to those bars.
 
2009-09-09 07:11:21 PM  
Pope Michael of Discordia: I'm not some bad-ass but if someone grabbed my kid over a pizza, he'd be an ex-pizza man.


unless he had a 9mm pointed at you. then you'd be screaming like barbie.
 
2009-09-09 07:12:03 PM  
isn't Unbridled American Capitalism great!!
 
2009-09-09 07:12:55 PM  
Was the ransom 2 dollars?

/i know it was a paperboy.
//wanted a bike with skis.
 
2009-09-09 07:14:31 PM  
AdolfOliverPanties: GIMME BACK MY SON!!!

And some extra napkins and packets of crushed peppers.


LOL. Bread sticks just came out of my nose.
 
2009-09-09 07:16:54 PM  
Linux_Yes: isn't Unbridled American Capitalism great!!

Errr, this happened in Australia. It's more likely to do with the fact that it happened in the Northern Territory than anything to do with capitalist greed.

The NT is the sort of place where you get glassed for accidentally "looking at someone funny". Think the opening pub sequence in Crocodile Dundee.
 
2009-09-09 07:17:47 PM  
On the other hand, the Octomom might just give you one of her kids as a tip.
 
2009-09-09 07:18:01 PM  
Linux_Yes: isn't Unbridled American Capitalism great!!

Especially when it's in Australia..?
 
2009-09-09 07:18:46 PM  
How big a tip if I want him to keep the snotty brat?
 
2009-09-09 07:20:21 PM  
Two dollars!
 
2009-09-09 07:21:20 PM  
Quasar: Did they order from Alfredo's Pizza Kitchen? Or Pizza By Alfredo?

This is important.


It's Alfredo's Pizza Cafe, dumbass. THIS IS IMPORTANT!

/just saw that one 2 days ago
 
2009-09-09 07:25:17 PM  
Pope Michael of Discordia: I'm not some bad-ass but if someone grabbed my kid over a pizza, he'd be an ex-pizza man.

Then pay your farkin pizza bill!!! Meh, your kid is annoying. Here, you can have your pizza and kid for free.
 
2009-09-09 07:25:23 PM  
That seems reasonable. Tips are an important part of their income.
 
2009-09-09 07:26:30 PM  
Came for WAAAAAAALLLT! and leaving satisfied.
 
2009-09-09 07:27:09 PM  
Slower pizza's more luscious,
And the King of Spain never rushes!

/it took this long?
 
2009-09-09 07:27:40 PM  
4.bp.blogspot.com
 
2009-09-09 07:33:08 PM  
After today's epic internet AW thread, I don't know if I can get rollin on something that may be a tipping thread.

/hmmm
 
2009-09-09 07:34:16 PM  
Hand Banana: That seems reasonable. Tips are an important part of their income.

Not in Australia.
 
2009-09-09 07:34:53 PM  
Came for the Office Pizza Coupon Scene, Leaving Satisfied

/Thanks VvonderJesus
 
2009-09-09 07:35:23 PM  
feanturi: Slower pizza's more luscious,
And the King of Spain never rushes!

/it took this long?


You may be wondering how I came to be living in Canada after being royalty in Australia...
 
2009-09-09 07:42:47 PM  
At least he didn't rape and murder the kid.
 
2009-09-09 07:53:28 PM  
skinink: On the other hand, the Octomom might just give you one of her kids as a tip.

And probably never miss it.
 
2009-09-09 07:54:02 PM  
She didn't refuse to tip she refused to pay period. Totally worth snatching a brat over.
 
2009-09-09 08:14:49 PM  
Linux_Yes: isn't Unbridled American Capitalism great!!

Are you suggesting free pizza is a right of the people? Because I might have to agree with you if that's the case.
 
2009-09-09 08:24:14 PM  
An hour late? Last time I had a pizza delivered that late, I just refused it. An hour after I ordered, I called to ask what was taking so long. They said they were backed up and didn't know how much longer it would be. I said, "Forget it. I'll go out for dinner." As I was leaving the house 20 minutes later, the delivery guy showed up. I thought about paying (and not tipping) but realized that the pizza must have been in his car for more than 20 minutes by then because they wouldn't have sent him out with a canceled order. I told him it was too late. He could leave the pizza or take it back but I'd already put on my pants so I was going out to dinner. He apologized and kept the pizza.

/cool story
 
2009-09-09 08:26:55 PM  
I'll never understand the concept of "If it's late, it's free"... when does your own personal judgement of length time translate into your right to steal? And not steal without being caught.. you're really saying "I think you're a farker, so I'm taking this, and you're going to stand there and watch".

Wouldn't fry here in Australia. The police would be called, and you'd be hauled off to prison. (much like a guy who held a kid for ransom)
 
2009-09-09 08:32:46 PM  
Pro tip for pizza delivery drivers.


Money first then give pizza.


/learned the hard way
//delivering pizzas sucked
 
2009-09-09 08:35:10 PM  
I've gotten whole pizzas at the bar for $5 because they were late and were refused.

/drunk hungry is a mean hungry
 
2009-09-09 08:41:53 PM  
I used to work as a driver (unnamed store). Each day we'd get orders for pizzas that weren't picked up or had the wrong addresses. These were given out to the staff if they wanted them. Sometimes a stack of pizzas 10 high would wait for someone to claim them/some.

Great for when you're coming home to a party.
 
2009-09-09 08:51:11 PM  
i think the pizza guy was just pissed off from learning that there is no truth to cable t.v. porn.
/did some one order a pep & cheese, with a side of hard cock?
//heh.
 
2009-09-09 09:05:21 PM  
What Pizza King pizza might look like.

i521.photobucket.com

They're mostly found in Indiana.
I love me some double pepperoni extra crisp Pizza King. So crisp it better be burnt on the edges.
 
2009-09-09 09:08:37 PM  
DanRankin: i think the pizza guy was just pissed off from learning that there is no truth to cable t.v. porn.
/did some one order a pep & cheese, with a side of hard cock?
//heh.


Well... there's some truth to it. I've delivered to bachelor parties before with strippers in action. And to females who just like to pay for pizza naked (nice tippers, maybe because change is hard to put away). And even to a couple of cat houses (even thou they're meant to be illegal here).
 
2009-09-09 09:45:54 PM  
Reincarnate: I'll never understand the concept of "If it's late, it's free"... when does your own personal judgement of length time translate into your right to steal?

In a couple of former lives, I used to deliver. Our policy was "30 minutes or free". Start time told to you as you ordered.

Of course, we had one driver that would deliver at 28 minutes, get paid, and report to the store "32 mins...free" and keep the $20 the customer paid.
That lasted a week or two before he got busted.
 
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