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(Chron)   Modern day Paul Bunyan mistakenly fells 1000 trees in public park   ( divider line
    More: Asinine  
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6296 clicks; posted to Main » on 08 Mar 2003 at 1:16 AM (14 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

95 Comments     (+0 »)

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2003-03-08 01:19:06 AM  
2003-03-08 01:19:43 AM  
2003-03-08 01:21:14 AM  
Tree fall down go boom.
2003-03-08 01:22:17 AM  
Wow I remember getting drunk and doing that once.

Wait, no I don't.
2003-03-08 01:25:02 AM  
i bet that grows hair on the chest.
2003-03-08 01:25:14 AM  
This is a sad day for the Lorax.
2003-03-08 01:26:28 AM  
it's no wonder his ox is blue.
2003-03-08 01:26:38 AM  
So, "If a tree falls in the forest..." thousand times, does anyone hear it?
wil [TotalFark]
2003-03-08 01:27:18 AM  
"Modern Day Paul Bunyan?!"

I bet you a dollar he doesn't even have an ox, much less a big blue one, the slacker.
2003-03-08 01:27:36 AM  
If a tree falls in the forest and no one's around to hear,
do all the other trees point and laugh?
2003-03-08 01:27:55 AM  
Where were the park rangers? Jeez, they have people watching parks less than 2 square acres total in Arizona.
2003-03-08 01:28:53 AM  
I live near Houston.

That is all.
2003-03-08 01:29:08 AM  
Drives through park entrance, past ball fields, cuts down many, many trees. Must be sombody elses problem, hey this is Texas and the president of the world is on my side.
2003-03-08 01:29:11 AM  
Gah. No such thing as a 'square acre'!
2003-03-08 01:29:37 AM  

Maybe they were off chopping their own logs.
/nudge nudge wink wink say no more
2003-03-08 01:29:47 AM  
What a moron. He is so farked.

On a side note, HA HA!
2003-03-08 01:30:24 AM  
If the trees were so obviously on park land, then howwizzit that no park person noticed while 20 acres and 1000 trees were harvested? Sounds to me like a bunch of whining hypcritical tree-hugging crybabies going for as much publicity as they can get. waaah! waaah!
2003-03-08 01:32:04 AM  

How does that make them hypocritical? They weren't the ones cutting down the trees.
2003-03-08 01:32:31 AM  
I'd fell it.
2003-03-08 01:33:08 AM  
they're hypocritical because I said so! waah Waaaah!
2003-03-08 01:33:41 AM  

2003-03-08 01:34:24 AM  
also, their houses are probably built out of pine. just like mine.
2003-03-08 01:36:27 AM  
Now you're just grasping, Bolhuijo.
But whatever. Death to trees everywhere! I won't rest until all rainforests cease to exist!
2003-03-08 01:38:33 AM  

That's obvious...lets say you have 1 ranger for 50 square miles of forest. They spend half their day doing paperwork. How often do they see every square acre of that land? Sounds to me like you're a brainwashed right winger. Loggers quite often stray onto federal and state land, or out of their permitted areas. Know why? Because the logs they can get easily are much, much more valuable than any fine they might recieve.
2003-03-08 01:38:39 AM  
"If the trees were so obviously on park land, then howwizzit that no park person noticed while 20 acres and 1000 trees were harvested? Sounds to me like a bunch of whining hypcritical tree-hugging crybabies going for as much publicity as they can get. waaah! waaah!"

WTF are you talking about?
2003-03-08 01:38:40 AM  
If their pine bark beetles are as bad as the ones around here, then those trees would be dead soon anyways. From what I hear, they spread fast and the only way to stop them is to clear cut a few acres.
2003-03-08 01:38:51 AM  
yes! now you're speakin' my language. pave the planet!
(I've been drinkin'. only a little.)
2003-03-08 01:40:00 AM  
Now and throughout history when people get wood, they'll think of Trojans.

Nuff said...
2003-03-08 01:40:43 AM  
YNada...actually, the way to resist bark beetles is to not have forests composed entirely of secondary growth pine. But it's too late for that. And there's no way to convince the logging companies that planting thousands of white pine might not be the best way to rehabilitate the land they log.
2003-03-08 01:42:01 AM  
/logging off
2003-03-08 01:42:06 AM  
I'm just sayin, the guy had to drive his logging stuff past a ballpark, and nobody noticed? They got park guys to run off kids who ride bikes over the pitcher's mound, yet they didn't notice?
The whiners who want to send the guy to jail are the ones who should be cut up into small pieces.
2003-03-08 01:42:12 AM  
Sorry, i can't resist...

He was obviously barking the wrong orders. Someone needs to cut him down to size. The courts should not leaf him be. I axe you, what wood jesus do?
2003-03-08 01:44:28 AM  
He isn't even using an axe!
2003-03-08 01:45:14 AM  
[image from too old to be available]
2003-03-08 01:45:16 AM  
Just because the park service looked the other way for the whole *illegal* cutting incident doesn't mean that they should get off. If they did get the parks service to look the other way, the people who took the bribes should be in jail. But just because someone paid a couple of flunkies off to steal timber from the citizens of the city, and yes they "owned" the trees and the profits from them, doesn't mean they shouldn't have to pay for the value of the trees they stole.
2003-03-08 01:45:31 AM  
"The trees, according to preliminary estimates, are valued at hundreds of thousands of dollars."

2003-03-08 01:46:56 AM  
Actually, hundreds of thousands sounds a bit low. One decent sized cedar is worth thousands alone. Although these pines are probably fairly small, and pine isn't worth all that much.
2003-03-08 01:47:04 AM  
yes, those trees are valued at hundreds of thousands, when shaped into 2x4s and put into the shape of a house.
2003-03-08 01:47:11 AM  
Oh nos... 20 acres of trees!! I used to live on a ten acre lot outside city limits... it's not that big a deal trust me.
2003-03-08 01:47:56 AM  
Three assinine tags in a row...
2003-03-08 01:48:00 AM  
Fark that. We are talking about farking trees here. You do know that you can grow them again right? Do ya? Huh? Do ya? farking tree huggers.
2003-03-08 01:48:31 AM  
Ok, quick research, 3 feet in diameter and usually 50 feet high with a max of about 100 feet. Yeah, scrub pine...not good for all that much, and thus cheap.
2003-03-08 01:49:16 AM  
Duderock...I can rip a hunk out of your leg and you'll grow it back too. Doesn't mean it isn't a crime...
2003-03-08 01:49:39 AM  

Yeah, I heard that too. Some newspaper article I read refered to the pine bark beetles as nature's way of creating diversity. From what I read, there are far too many pine trees planted because they are cheap and easy to grow. Any time one species of plant is overpopulated, it becomes more susceptible to disease and pestilence. The government has actually been paying to clear cut pines in many parks to try and stop the beetle. Of course, by trying to stop it, they are actually encouraging future outbreaks.
2003-03-08 01:51:24 AM  
Actually, the clear cuts to get rid of the beetles isn't a problem, if what they plant is managed carefully. If you cut down all the pines and don't do anything, you suddenly have a huge fire's all the brush that grows up in cut areas that really creates fire hazards. If you plant and put in tons of pine again, you're setting up the same damn problem all over again.
2003-03-08 01:52:17 AM  
I don't have any problem with them telling the contractor to replant all that area and clean it up, but when they start talking about trespassing and theft charges and jail, then I want to start cutting people into small pieces. tree huggers. feh.
2003-03-08 01:54:00 AM  
The contractor should just pay for the value of the trees on the open market. The city gets the value of what they sell, the contractor doesn't make money from not knowing how to read a farking map (or deciding to steal trees he knows he hasn't paid to harvest). Everything ends up fine.
2003-03-08 01:58:38 AM  
Yea, but unlike a farking tree I have a central nervous system and a brain (as far as I know).

I can only think of one critter on this planet that can grow back appendages, the octopus. It's true (I think).
2003-03-08 02:00:51 AM  
Actually, many animals can regenerate limbs or more. A starfish can regenerate many limbs, if they have a piece of their central disks. The lower animals (corals, anemones to a certain degree, sponges) can regenerate from nearly nothing.

Lizards can regenerate tails, salamanders can regenerate legs.

But if I took a couple of pounds of muscle, you could rebuilt that. Eventually.
2003-03-08 02:02:03 AM  
I think it's worth noting here that of what's posted now, I counted only ONE post that could be construed as "sorry/disappointed the pines got knocked over", or even "on the pine's side (morally speaking)". Here it is:

>Duderock...I can rip a hunk out of your leg and you'll grow >it back too. Doesn't mean it isn't a crime...

EVERYONE else celebrated, mocked it, or was off topic. Way 2 go. I couldn't agree more. The world is exactly the same now that those trees are gone, so who gives a crap?
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