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(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)   NRA lobbyist protests change of state bird because it eats out of people's hands. "Begging for food isn't sweet. It's lazy, and it's a welfare mentality"   (blogs.tampabay.com) divider line 148
    More: Florida, NRA, begging, messiahs, lobbyists, habits, TypePad, Marion Hammer, NRA lobbyist  
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10147 clicks; posted to Main » on 09 Sep 2009 at 6:29 AM (4 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2009-09-09 12:52:32 AM
You know what I hate? Anteaters. How hard is it to pick up an ant? But no, they're so goddamn lazy they evolved long tongues so they wouldn't have to do any extra work.
 
2009-09-09 01:09:59 AM
So does Poe's law only apply to fundies, or can it be applied to Fox Nation as well?

/seriously, I keep waiting to wake up to the news that this was all elaborate performance art
 
2009-09-09 01:20:38 AM
Only a Republican would get pissed at a bird and connect it to the "welfare state."
 
2009-09-09 01:55:26 AM
This is satire, right? It... is satire, right???
 
2009-09-09 01:58:48 AM
tudzy.com
 
2009-09-09 02:26:31 AM
Mentat: You know what I hate? Anteaters. How hard is it to pick up an ant? But no, they're so goddamn lazy they evolved long tongues so they wouldn't have to do any extra work.

Go back to Africa, anteaters!
 
2009-09-09 03:22:20 AM
The Onion couldn't come up with anything better than this. I'm shedding Glenn Beck tears as I fear for my country.
 
2009-09-09 04:12:59 AM
Hammer was unmoved. "Begging for food isn't sweet," she testified in a committee hearing. "It's lazy, and it's a welfare mentality." Scrub jays had lots of other bad habits that disqualified them to represent Florida, she contended. "They eat the eggs of other birds," she told lawmakers. "That's robbery and murder."

That's weird. I have the same opinion about lobbyists.
 
2009-09-09 04:46:01 AM
Hammer notes that in this dispute, she is talking for herself, not the NRA, even if she does use NRA-sounding arguments.

Wow. So Hammer actually may agree with the organization she works for instead of just being a talking whore for the them and may actually use the same terminology and tone in her everyday beliefs. But what is really surprising in this "unbiased" article is that this would come as a surprise to this third-rate writer for a ....BLOG!!! Oh, never mind...

It's not news...its BLOGGER.com
Coming soon to a FARK near you...
 
2009-09-09 06:14:12 AM
www.nyu.edu

"So, tell me of this place called South Beach....."
 
2009-09-09 06:25:55 AM
DjangoStonereaver: "So, tell me of this place called South Beach....."

My God... it's full of... turkeys.
 
2009-09-09 06:38:15 AM
Mentat: You know what I hate? Anteaters. How hard is it to pick up an ant? But no, they're so goddamn lazy they evolved long tongues so they wouldn't have to do any extra work.

joshinthecity.files.wordpress.com
 
2009-09-09 06:45:13 AM
LOL, WUT ?
 
2009-09-09 06:46:16 AM
GAT_00: Only a Republican would get pissed at a bird and connect it to the "welfare state."

And only an idiot would call a predatory bird a thief and murderer.
 
2009-09-09 06:54:14 AM
He is obviously being metaphorical. The ability to think and communicate metaphorically is correlated with high intelligence. Peole who cannot think metaphorically have trouble with this, but that simply illustrates the point.
 
2009-09-09 06:54:28 AM
Nick Nostril: LOL, WUT ?

I'm still laughing.
 
2009-09-09 07:00:39 AM
It's called anthropomorphism. Coupled with the attention whore antics it "angry's up the blood" of her fellow mouth breathers.

Seems to work well enough.

Rememeber kids, in a democracy the moronic have just as much of a say as you do.
 
2009-09-09 07:00:45 AM
This, this has to be a joke right? No one could possibly function being this stupid. Could they?
 
2009-09-09 07:01:38 AM
She thinks mockingbirds are better than ospreys? What a loon. Mockingbirds are damn annoying - the only thing they imitate around my apt. is car alarms. At least the real car alarms eventually stop making noise.
 
2009-09-09 07:02:20 AM
if you don't like it, shoot it. it's the american/nra way.
 
2009-09-09 07:05:08 AM
Hush little baby, don't say a word.
 
2009-09-09 07:05:31 AM
No idea if the quote comes from someplace else, but from _The Grantsville Gazette, Vol. IX_:

"The price of freedom is the defense of idiots"
 
2009-09-09 07:06:13 AM
She should run for public office. America needs more strong patriots like this making decisions that affuct our lives.
 
2009-09-09 07:06:53 AM
You don't even want to know what she thinks of crows.
 
2009-09-09 07:11:31 AM
rocket surgery: She should run for public office. America needs more strong patriots like this making decisions that affuct our lives.

ICWYDT

/and I like it.
 
2009-09-09 07:16:49 AM
LOL! That's so farking stupid....

/ That crazy biatch just made my entire morning.
 
2009-09-09 07:18:34 AM
Bad_Seed: You don't even want to know what she thinks of crows.

A group of crows is called a "murder" of crows.
 
2009-09-09 07:20:07 AM
Nakito: He is obviously being metaphorical. The ability to think and communicate metaphorically is correlated with high intelligence. Peole who cannot think metaphorically have trouble with this, but that simply illustrates the point.

You sort of have a point, I guess. I mean, I can understand him having an opinion and I can even understand it being symbolic rather than practical (after all, a state bird is not exactly practical in the first place).

But, honestly, he's a lobbyist. Its his job to make sure his public statements, especially to reporters and state officials, have something to do with

(a) hunting or
(b) gun law.

I mean, really, what kind of BS are we paying the guy for, exactly? Were it my state, I'd be asking the organization that they at least stop paying his frivolous ass.

//"I'm totally not speaking for the NRA here" as a preface to your statements doesn't absolve you of your responsibility as an employee to not make the organization look retarded when you're a goddamned spokesman. Professional ethics are apparently dead in Florida.
 
2009-09-09 07:20:14 AM
Wow. You really can't fix stupid.
 
2009-09-09 07:20:58 AM
This and the rest of the retarded right-wing circus feels like a weapon of mass distraction, to me. I mean, c'mon, we've been witness to a display of all the worst assumptions non-righties have about these type of people - IMO, it feels like theatre.

Some people get scared from watching the Grand Gignol they can see... I'm more scared by what it's meant to be hiding. Too bad investigative journalism is dead, huh? :(
 
2009-09-09 07:21:00 AM

Why don't you gun happy rednecks just hunt it to extinction?

i236.photobucket.com
 
2009-09-09 07:21:09 AM
Vertdang: This, this has to be a joke right? No one could possibly function being this stupid. Could they?

Have you been to Florida? The entire state is composed of mouth-breathing, fundie republicans. I lived there as long as I possibly could, but became disgusted and moved to a more progressive, forward-thinking state.....North Carolina
 
2009-09-09 07:22:16 AM
voodoohotdog: It's called anthropomorphism.

Anthropocentrism. Anthropomorphism is the belief that Barbie and Teddy bears are alive.
 
2009-09-09 07:22:18 AM
bohab: Mentat: You know what I hate? Anteaters. How hard is it to pick up an ant? But no, they're so goddamn lazy they evolved long tongues so they wouldn't have to do any extra work.

Thread over, go home.
 
2009-09-09 07:22:34 AM
www.nrawinningteam.com

I have a solution for this. May I present the next Florida mascot, the Wrinkled Coont.

/hot like a smokin gun
 
2009-09-09 07:22:58 AM
....this has been another episode of "Crazy du jour" brought to you by America's right wing.

America's right wing: come for the family values, stay for the hate groups.
 
2009-09-09 07:23:48 AM
Can I just say not all Ospreys are welfare junkies. Some of my best friends are Ospreys and all they want is to make a decent living to support their family.

/Don't want to sound racist
//but I think an osprey stole my tv
/wait, we actually are talking about the bird here?
//slashies
 
2009-09-09 07:25:18 AM
"For my own part I wish the Bald Eagle had not been chosen the Representative of our Country. He is a Bird of bad moral Character. He does not get his Living honestly. You may have seen him perched on some dead Tree near the River, where, too lazy to fish for himself, he watches the Labour of the Fishing Hawk; and when that diligent Bird has at length taken a Fish, and is bearing it to his Nest for the Support of his Mate and young Ones, the Bald Eagle pursues him and takes it from him.

With all this Injustice, he is never in good Case but like those among Men who live by Sharping & Robbing he is generally poor and often very lousy. Besides he is a rank Coward: The little King Bird not bigger than a Sparrow attacks him boldly and drives him out of the District. He is therefore by no means a proper Emblem for the brave and honest Americans who have driven all the King Birds from our Country..."

- Ben Franklin
 
2009-09-09 07:26:56 AM
Oh, whatever. She doesn't like the bird because it's a scavenger and makes some political arguments against it. Silly arguments, but probably actually effective in political circles.

This is just silly, not really stupid, unless you think she should not be getting into it as a NRA spokesperson. But hey, some people have strong feelings about birds. My mother hated bluejays and couldn't stand English Sparrows.
 
2009-09-09 07:26:59 AM
untaken_name: She thinks mockingbirds are better than ospreys? What a loon. Mockingbirds are damn annoying - the only thing they imitate around my apt. is car alarms. At least the real car alarms eventually stop making noise.

Mockingbirds actually have a rather sweet song, but they are territorial and aggressive. When I lived in Tennessee, I had to walk past a mockingbird nest on my way to the job, and it would divebomb me.
 
2009-09-09 07:28:46 AM
Nakito
He is obviously being metaphorical. The ability to think and communicate metaphorically is correlated with high intelligence. Peole who cannot think metaphorically have trouble with this, but that simply illustrates the point.

Really? Or is that just more smart-ass banter on fark? I use metaphors all the time to illustrate my points and try to get people to sympathize with the problems of others (putting out fires at work). Does that make me smart or just more Zen?

/oooooooooooooooooommmmmmmmmm
 
2009-09-09 07:30:12 AM
Jim_Callahan:

//"I'm totally not speaking for the NRA here" as a preface to your statements doesn't absolve you of your responsibility as an employee to not make the organization look retarded when you're a goddamned spokesman. Professional ethics are apparently dead in Florida.


The "preface" is total ass-covering bullshiat. Would anybody quote this person if they weren't a spokesperson for a powerful lobbying group? Especially if they were saying something this stupid?
 
2009-09-09 07:34:36 AM
stuffthatmoves.files.wordpress.com

You know what else I don't get? Peanuts. I mean, why do they come with that hard-to-open shell? And you never know how many nuts you're going to get. Sure, it advertises two, but sometimes you get one peanut, sometimes you get two normal-sized ones with a tiny little third one. Speaking of peanuts, why is my head so big? It's like an orange on a toothpick. And why did they have to start making toothpicks out of plastic? When I was a kid we LIKED getting splinters in our gums.
 
2009-09-09 07:38:53 AM
So, what do call it when *you* eat an egg, Marion? Someone had to "rob" those hens to get that egg to you. Then you break it open!? That's chicken ABORTION!

/Delicious chicken abortion
 
2009-09-09 07:40:54 AM
NRA lobbyist protests change of state bird because it eats out of people's hands. "Begging for food isn't sweet. It's lazy, and it's a welfare mentality"

Subby, according to the news link, this information and quote is from 1999. Nice work.
 
2009-09-09 07:41:13 AM
He has a DoDo on his family crest.
 
2009-09-09 07:41:43 AM
Gulliver: "For my own part I wish the Bald Eagle had not been chosen the Representative of our Country. He is a Bird of bad moral Character. He does not get his Living honestly. You may have seen him perched on some dead Tree near the River, where, too lazy to fish for himself, he watches the Labour of the Fishing Hawk; and when that diligent Bird has at length taken a Fish, and is bearing it to his Nest for the Support of his Mate and young Ones, the Bald Eagle pursues him and takes it from him.

With all this Injustice, he is never in good Case but like those among Men who live by Sharping & Robbing he is generally poor and often very lousy. Besides he is a rank Coward: The little King Bird not bigger than a Sparrow attacks him boldly and drives him out of the District. He is therefore by no means a proper Emblem for the brave and honest Americans who have driven all the King Birds from our Country..."

- Ben Franklin


That f*cking right wing bastard. DOWN WITH THE NRA! F*CK THE POLICE! ABORTIONS FOR ALL! KILL WHITEY!

/conform
 
2009-09-09 07:44:12 AM
god damn he makes an excellent point! those damn dirty hippy birds. always begging and smoking pot.
 
2009-09-09 07:46:28 AM
Vertdang: This, this has to be a joke right? No one could possibly function being this stupid. Could they?

Well you have to figure she has a lot of free time on her hands being the NRA lobbyist in a state where the legislators seems to compete against each other to come up with the most ridiculously lax guns laws in the country ("I'll pass a law allowing you to shoot anyone in your house, no questions asked, your turn, Jethro" "well, I'll pass a law allowing you to gun down anyone in the street that scares ya, you're up, Cletus" "I uhhh...I'll pass a law forcing businesses to let their employees bring guns to work...all yours Buford" "Shoot!, uhhh...okay, how 'bout this? You can now shoot anyone who..looks ornery or like they 'need killin' "
 
2009-09-09 07:47:19 AM
Standard Deviant
god damn he makes an excellent point! those damn dirty hippy birds. always begging and smoking pot.

Yeah, but have you ever had one of their grilled cheeses? Man they're sublime...
 
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