If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Metro)   Up to 50% of Britons have been injured by their biscuits. Calls to ban them cannot be far behind   (metro.co.uk) divider line 61
    More: Stupid  
•       •       •

4204 clicks; posted to Main » on 08 Sep 2009 at 11:03 AM (5 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



61 Comments   (+0 »)
   

Archived thread

First | « | 1 | 2 | » | Last | Show all
 
2009-09-08 05:58:23 AM  
That's the way the cookie crumbles.
 
2009-09-08 07:05:25 AM  
The number of times I've lost half a biccy in my tea. The mental anguish is intense.
 
2009-09-08 08:33:57 AM  
Maybe they're injured because they're eating limp biscuits.
 
2009-09-08 09:06:06 AM  
This is a biscuit:
www.majhost.com

And this is a cookie:
www.majhost.com

Bloody English, quit screwing up the language!
 
2009-09-08 09:28:51 AM  
Did Humpty grab them?
 
2009-09-08 10:00:21 AM  
Mah biscuits are burnin, mah biscuits are burnin!

www.nencetti.org
 
2009-09-08 10:06:56 AM  
BillCo: This is a biscuit

No, that's a scone. This is a biscuit:

upload.wikimedia.org

And this is a cookie

I'll give you that, we need to distinguish limp-wristed American abominations from terrifying British biscuits.
 
2009-09-08 10:21:08 AM  
I have had people claim to be injured by my biscuits.
My air biscuits.
 
2009-09-08 11:06:49 AM  
I guess that's the way the cookie crumbles.
 
2009-09-08 11:06:56 AM  
That's a croissant they'll have to bear.
 
2009-09-08 11:07:22 AM  
jgtwo.files.wordpress.com

grab em!
 
2009-09-08 11:07:50 AM  
FarkinNortherner: I'll give you that, we need to distinguish limp-wristed American abominations from terrifying British biscuits.

Are you actually criticizing soft bake cookies?! Them's fighting words my friend.
 
2009-09-08 11:07:51 AM  
If biscuits are illegal then only the criminals will have biscuits! We'll be at their mercy!
 
2009-09-08 11:08:18 AM  
There was an unnecessarily snide undertone the article.

Snack-related injuries are no joke.
 
2009-09-08 11:11:28 AM  
static.tvguide.com

Likes biscuits and gravy, ummm mmmm.

That would suck, to be killed in a snack related incident.
 
2009-09-08 11:12:38 AM  
What about the blanc mange?
 
2009-09-08 11:14:39 AM  
I wonder if anybody has been hurt by a Limp Biscuit.

But if Brits are listening to Limp Bizkit then they deserve all the injury they can get.
 
2009-09-08 11:15:51 AM  
 
2009-09-08 11:20:18 AM  
You gotta watch out for the ricochet.
 
2009-09-08 11:20:20 AM  
If cookies are criminalized, only criminals will have cookies.

You can have my biscuits when you pry them out of my cold, dead, crumb-covered fingers.

Thank god - in Texas we have the Keebler doctrine!

"I picked up a piece of gum, so you picked up a gobstopper. So I picked up a lollypop, and you picked up a candy bar. I picked up a biscuit, and you baked a cake. I made brownies, and you bought two dozen donuts...." Ban all snack foods!

There's nothing dangerous about biscuits when people are taught simple rules of safety from day one. More people are injured drinking glasses of milk. Where I grew up, it was the norm for six, eight, or ten-year-olds to eat biscuits on a regular basis. What's more, their parents bought them the biscuits!
 
2009-09-08 11:22:22 AM  
Nothing makes a cookie sound more delicious than calling it a "digestive."
 
2009-09-08 11:25:40 AM  
fireclown: grab em!

Damn! Beat me to it!

/biscuits courtesy the Talkhowyalike Posse
 
2009-09-08 11:28:33 AM  
Nakito: Nothing makes a cookie sound more delicious than calling it a "digestive."

img401.imageshack.us

Check it off!
 
2009-09-08 11:33:49 AM  
Nakito: Nothing makes a cookie sound more delicious than calling it a "digestive."

And look, the bloody pilots got Jammie Dodgers!
 
2009-09-08 11:49:49 AM  
Nakito: Nothing makes a cookie sound more delicious than calling it a "digestive."


Same as making beer sound more delicious by calling it "drinkable?"

/most retarded slogan/ad campaign EVAR
//ooh! it has "drinkability!" Sold!
 
2009-09-08 11:52:36 AM  
intensities.files.wordpress.com

Brit, it looks like you didn't get any biscuits...
 
2009-09-08 11:53:48 AM  
The Britons? Who are the Britons?.....
 
2009-09-08 11:55:58 AM  
In the hills of Tennessee,
Sitting 'neath the hickory tree,
There's an ordinary rifle-shooting mountineer.
He loves a mountain feud,
And he also loves good food,
And when he goes home for supper you will hear:

Oh, pass the biscuits Mirandy,
I'm just as hungry as sin.
Pass the gravy Mirandy,
Give me some sup to sup them in.
Since nine o'clock, I've been sitting on a rock,
A shooting everything one in sight.
I shot the coys and a dozen Martin boys,
Shooting gives a man an appetite.

Oh, pass the biscuits Mirandy,
Pass them and kiss me goodbye,
There so heavy Mirandy,
I feel like I'm a gonna die.
 
2009-09-08 11:56:24 AM  
FarkinNortherner: BillCo: This is a biscuit

No, that's a scone. This is a biscuit:



And this is a cookie

I'll give you that, we need to distinguish limp-wristed American abominations from terrifying British biscuits.


probonobaker.typepad.com

THAT is a scone. Hint: You can't get them at KFC
 
2009-09-08 11:57:00 AM  
Dammit, biscuits and gravy sounds good right now.
 
2009-09-08 11:59:56 AM  
Well I fail. I posted the lyrics to "Pass the Biscuits, Mirandy," but didn't notice all the errors beforehand.
 
2009-09-08 12:01:07 PM  
Can't say I've been injured by any biscuits. But I've been clawed by cats making them.

img36.imageshack.us
 
2009-09-08 12:04:48 PM  
theropod: Can't say I've been injured by any biscuits. But I've been clawed by cats making them.

How did you get your cat to make biscuits?
 
2009-09-08 12:06:31 PM  
We Americans believe in safe snacks.

www.hermes-press.com
 
2009-09-08 12:06:53 PM  
Boomerang biscuits?

/close-combat crumpets?
 
2009-09-08 12:10:47 PM  
Biscuit:
www.majhost.com


Scone:
probonobaker.typepad.com


Scooby Snack:
upload.wikimedia.org
 
2009-09-08 12:23:36 PM  
Shakespeare's Monkey: Likes biscuits and gravy, ummm mmmm.

That would suck, to be killed in a snack related incident.


not to nitpick, but Carl likes his biscuits with mustard.
/nitpicker
 
2009-09-08 12:24:48 PM  
Bow bow bow...
 
2009-09-08 12:34:21 PM  
Good job to those who actually know what a scone is. Jeez.
 
2009-09-08 01:02:59 PM  
Firststepsadoozie: Bow bow bow...

what'dya want fa nothin??
 
2009-09-08 01:08:10 PM  
Llois: Firststepsadoozie: Bow bow bow...

what'dya want fa nothin??


How 'bout a coolie-water sandwich and a Sunday-go-to-meetin' bun?

/mmmm, do dat a'gin....
 
2009-09-08 01:13:26 PM  
To save Britons from this plight, hey need to make the move to rubber biscuits (pop up video!). Those are totally safe.
 
2009-09-08 01:14:46 PM  
Leonard_Cohen: Brit, it looks like you didn't get any biscuits...

How about a really big biscuit?

/happy 80th birthday son!
 
2009-09-08 01:32:51 PM  
"Teacher was poisoned by these biscuits"
-Chen Zhen
 
2009-09-08 01:34:20 PM  
American biscuits are not baked twice, therefore they cannot be true biscuits. There's no shame in being a savory scone, though.
 
2009-09-08 01:49:21 PM  
Dwarf Bread??


t2.gstatic.com
 
2009-09-08 01:57:58 PM  
Shakespeare's Monkey: Likes biscuits and gravy, ummm mmmm.

That would suck, to be killed in a snack related incident.


You are wrong kind sir. It is Biscuits and Mustard that he likes. Get it right.

www.reallifephotos.org
 
2009-09-08 02:16:09 PM  
really?!?! Injured by a farking cookie?!? and not even by choking?!?

please tell me this is satire and Brits really aren't this moronic.
 
2009-09-08 02:24:00 PM  
FarkinNortherner: distinguish limp-wristed American abominations

Um, cookies are farking delicious.
 
2009-09-08 02:30:35 PM  
YixilTesiphon: Um, cookies are farking delicious.

OK, but when's the last time you saw anyone beheaded by one?
 
Displayed 50 of 61 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | » | Last | Show all



This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »
On Twitter





In Other Media


  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.

Report