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(Yahoo)   Scientists develop invisible condoms to prevent monkeys from getting HIV. No, seriously...   ( divider line
    More: Amusing  
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11888 clicks; posted to Main » on 06 Mar 2003 at 7:08 PM (14 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

89 Comments     (+0 »)

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2003-03-06 02:57:49 PM  
"They (the 'Scientists') put the gel, or a saline solution carrying the antibodies, into the vaginas of the 12 female monkeys, then put the virus in up to two hours later. This simulated sexual transmission of the virus."

Thank God I don't have to do this for a living...
2003-03-06 03:46:28 PM  
"Half of all new cases of HIV infection are in women."

Dear GOD! To think that half of the people getting aids are women. That's a whole 50%!

Scary that they pay people to come up with crap like that.
2003-03-06 03:57:10 PM  
But I'm wearing one of those new invisible condoms. Honestly, I am.

This is a teenage boy's dream.
2003-03-06 03:57:47 PM  
They need to come up with an invisible condom to prevent me from getting a soft-on.
2003-03-06 04:12:49 PM  
This why I use varnish. Yep. A couple of thick coats of minwax ultra hard varnish (gloss) keeps a nice safe barrier betwixt my viened and swollen blood bomber and any viral critters out there. Plus, you're always hard so if she wakes up first, she can get started without having to disturb your restful slumber.

Minwax. Pick up a can today.
2003-03-06 04:22:08 PM  
Beats putting a latex huggie on a monkey's stick.
2003-03-06 06:38:06 PM  

They used a hybrid virus, SHIV.
2003-03-06 07:13:53 PM  
Wasn't this posted a week or two ago?
2003-03-06 07:13:56 PM  
invisible cure for cancer still elusive.
2003-03-06 07:14:29 PM  
we need a boobies link before desperate farkers start getting off to this..
2003-03-06 07:14:39 PM  
Isnt this a dupe?
2003-03-06 07:14:50 PM  
Ass_Master: I'd like to SHIV you! Eh? Nothin'.
2003-03-06 07:15:19 PM

this is an interesting development, but good luck to the poor lab intern that had to put them on each monkey.
2003-03-06 07:16:20 PM  
Ahh, that felt good. Thunder STOLEN.
2003-03-06 07:16:50 PM  
I didn't submit this with a funnier headline yesterday.
2003-03-06 07:17:03 PM  
Time to saddle up a monkey!
2003-03-06 07:17:30 PM  
2003-03-06 07:17:53 PM  
I found this article surprisingly easy to contract AIDS to.
2003-03-06 07:18:40 PM  
Is this stuff any good against, er, "fetal infections".
2003-03-06 07:19:21 PM  
Why don't they just snip the MALE monkeys and dont bother with these "invisible" condoms

Ass_Master - SIV - Very good (a new cliche?)
2003-03-06 07:19:33 PM  
[image from too old to be available]

cute AIDS monkey
2003-03-06 07:19:42 PM  
Mon Feb 10, 4:30 PM ET

Almost a month old - certainly not news anymore.

Just more fodder for my "Stories are picked by a small perl script with some semi-fancy regex" theory.

People pay 5 bucks a month for this?

Nothing to see here folks, move along.....
2003-03-06 07:19:47 PM  
Very difficuly to fap to monkey pu$$y.
2003-03-06 07:20:11 PM  
WTF? Repeat.
Dumbass Mod tag, anyone?
2003-03-06 07:22:26 PM  
awww there isn't any flame war damn

/ goes to his corner of the net and sits
2003-03-06 07:24:09 PM  
[image from too old to be available]
2003-03-06 07:24:47 PM  
2003-03-06 07:26:07 PM  
repeat what?
2003-03-06 07:26:08 PM  
03-06-03 02:57:49 PM Chime
"They (the 'Scientists') put the gel, or a saline solution carrying the antibodies, into the vaginas of the 12 female monkeys, then put the virus in up to two hours later. This simulated sexual transmission of the virus."

Thank God I don't have to do this for a living...


03-06-03 07:20:11 PM ExplodingFish
WTF? Repeat.
Dumbass Mod tag, anyone?
The mods work in different office, blah blah blah. We can't expect them to be perfect all the time. It probably took more time out of your day to write that stupid two-line post than it would take you to skip over all the repeats for the next 3 weeks.

Lay off.
2003-03-06 07:27:17 PM  
Drug companies have suggested the market is not big enough . . .

I disagree. Marketed correctly, this could be a big thing. Mix the stuff (with and without spermicide) with a really good and safe lubricant, market it like crazy. The more you use, the safer you are! And no condom! Now available in environmentally safe gallon containers!

Just a thought.
2003-03-06 07:28:35 PM  
woofy's ears perk up

2003-03-06 07:30:56 PM  
Repeat, but that is how Fark is like marriage. The same woman or news every night. It is comforting.

BTW: Fb is the father. And France surrenders.
2003-03-06 07:38:32 PM  
WOOFYSF: so, you are "LIVN' IN S.F. AND AM A BITTER 'OL biatch". Too bad I didn't meet you when I lived there! Just by that statement you sound fun already!

And this thread isn't accelerating towards hell the way I hoped it would. Dang.
2003-03-06 07:41:46 PM  
I wonder how they picked which scientist got to insert the gel?
2003-03-06 07:42:07 PM  
SpinStopper : hey there ... well i am when i go out it is a show stoper ... with my alter ego HELLEN and her tequilla
2003-03-06 07:44:00 PM  
SpinStopper btw great bio as well looking to see what muppets dark thingee i am
2003-03-06 07:49:57 PM  
WOOFYSF: He he. I'm curious as to what muppet you are too.
2003-03-06 07:52:09 PM  
Anyone seen Pete? He was in the boat a second ago, who's left?
2003-03-06 07:52:41 PM  
[image from too old to be available]

omg this is what i got lolololol
2003-03-06 07:54:34 PM  
They probably got some grad student to do it.

"Hey, uh, James, shove this up that monkey's twat, would ya? Thanks."
2003-03-06 07:55:55 PM  
Scientists develop invisible condoms to prevent monkeys from getting HIV and Fark mods develop repeat to prevent Farkers from seeing original news. No, seriously...
2003-03-06 07:57:29 PM  
WOOFYSF: I just blew all over my keyboard. That was the cheapest thrill I've had in a long time! Thanks! No, really! You ... are ... (okay, I'm laughing too .... hard to type . .. . . .) anyway. That's funny.
2003-03-06 07:58:48 PM  
Condoms are the best known method for stopping its transmission.

Actually, not having sex with someone who has AIDS is much more effective.
2003-03-06 07:59:26 PM  
2003-03-06 07:59:46 PM  
Grover on Ecstacy, yeah that sounds about right.
2003-03-06 08:00:58 PM  
in the past, there were more men getting HIV than women, b/c of HIV's history in the gay community. That women represent 50% of new cases is huge in the spread of HIV. Huge in a bad way.

2003-03-06 08:02:09 PM  
"Half of all new cases of HIV (news - web sites) infection are in women"

HIV isn't a farking stock ticker symbol. Yahoo needs to fire some programmers.

Or am I wrong on this one?
2003-03-06 08:10:01 PM  
NoSkillzDotNet - Yep, I submitted this last month.
2003-03-06 08:10:05 PM  
"Hey, get the fark outta tried that like 4 weeks ago you dork." - some chick

2003-03-06 08:17:17 PM  
Sorry people, you got it wrong. You shank people with a shiv. That's how it goes.

Here's a sample conversation (from prison):

"You're my biatch now, Nancy!"
"Yeah, you little biatch! Watch your mouth, or I'll shank you with my shiv."
"Ok, just use that invisible condom."

*Proceed with an ass raping*

That's what context you use "SHIV" in.
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