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(Some Guy)   Several citations issued to people making and selling illegal bathtub cheese   ( divider line
    More: Weird  
•       •       •

7189 clicks; posted to Main » on 06 Mar 2003 at 12:01 PM (14 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

81 Comments     (+0 »)

Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | » | Newest | Show all

2003-03-06 12:46:47 PM  
Udderly disgusting.
2003-03-06 12:47:03 PM  
RagingLeonard - I really, REALLY did not need to know about that. UGH!
2003-03-06 12:47:03 PM  
2003-03-06 12:48:47 PM  
Is there a bathtub Cheeto on Ebay, yet?
2003-03-06 12:50:12 PM  
03-06-03 12:18:53 PM RaoulDuke
i have been permanently scarred by a photo of a certain woman in a certain bathtub with a certain substance spewing upwards at the camera. and that's all i will say for now.

/apologies for those in the know

Yeah, things I've learned this year:

it's better to be left out than to know what they saw.

Which is why I'm not clicking on RagingLeonard's link.
2003-03-06 12:52:48 PM  
You want some nasty illegal cheese? Check in my pants, there is something funky down there.
2003-03-06 12:58:41 PM  
...there's a muenster in my pants....
2003-03-06 01:06:27 PM  
RagingLeonard's link is perfectly safe.
2003-03-06 01:08:02 PM  
nuh-uh. Not taking any chances.
2003-03-06 01:12:14 PM  
I myself have never been invited to a bathtub cheese party and probably would not spend a great deal of money buying black market cheese. How much would you pay for bathtub cheese?
2003-03-06 01:13:45 PM  
Talk about a cottage industry. This story curdles my blood.
2003-03-06 01:18:35 PM  
Ok, people. It all sounds funny and light-hearted now... In '67, a major illegal cheese ring was busted that stretched from the wilds of Wisconsin and into Canada.

Rogue factions representing Californian cheese concerns were making an upstart motion to toppling Murray Oefersten, the self-styled "King of Cheese" of the mid-west. West coast muenster magnate Chip "Cheddar Pants" Connelly masterminded the Golden State minions in their bid to topple the midwest Prince of Provolone.

Many people were killed and cattle rustled. At the height of this co-jack conflict, digestive blockage was rampant and the people looked to their law enforcement to put an end to this campaign of terror.

This is a secret very few people know about and the authorities involved in this story are obviously privy to the atrocities of the past. Do not mock them, for they are all that stands between us and the Edam of Evil that is bathtub cheese. Thank the Gouda gods for them.

Thank the Gouda gods.
2003-03-06 01:19:13 PM  
I'm enjoy sick morbid things, but never have I been so disgusted as when I read about *human cheese*.
2003-03-06 01:19:47 PM  
RagingLeonard's link is perfectly safe.

I wouldn't say it was perfectly safe -- I've lost my appetite for a week.

But at least I didn't have to go scrub my eyeballs with an SOS pad afterwards.
2003-03-06 01:19:49 PM  
Oh come on. Who among us can honestly say we've never done this?

"It's turning into a damn POLICE STATE, I tell ya!" - Sam & Max
2003-03-06 01:21:53 PM  
Microbomb - doesn't the guy next to the Android look like a Downs Syndrome Kid that grew up?
2003-03-06 01:22:59 PM  
Do people really need to be reminded how goddamn awful some of the things we eat all the time are? I don't.
2003-03-06 01:33:50 PM  
After laughing my ass off at the story, I got to wondering how they pull this off. I make cheese in a 4 qt pot on ocasion (for deep fried cheese curds) and it's not an easy thing.

Damn, I really need to get a job!

Hmmmm...Bathtub Blood Sausage....
2003-03-06 01:37:20 PM  
It seems only proper that you'd eat bathtub cheese while drinking bathtub gin.
2003-03-06 01:55:48 PM  
iamnotadrinkinggame...i say that i won't click on those links.. but i still do.. and i usually regret it...
2003-03-06 02:06:53 PM  
When bathtub cheese is outlawed, only outlaws will have bathtub cheese!

Wheatweasel: Some of the stuff that settled to the bottom might have been cheese.

While alcohol and cheese are both products of fermentation (yeah yeast!) what was at the bottom of the bottle was probably raisin remnants and dead yeast. The layer of dead yeast at the bottom of a beer fermenter (called "trub") is actually very nutritious. If slimy and icky. If you take a vitamin with B complex in it, chances are that came from yeast.


And while I hate to be a party-pooper ("Hey! is this a pubic hair in my Mozerella?!?") the article stated the cheese was usually made in outdoor bathtubs... quite possible very sanitary ones at that.
2003-03-06 02:07:06 PM  
it looks like some of ya'll missed the very disturbing point about some of it being "mexican liquer cheese"... why anyone would want to mix alcohol and dairy products is beyond me.

when i was young and first saw someone drink a scotch and milk i wonder what the hell is wrong with people, and i still don't know.
2003-03-06 02:28:56 PM  
We're all in this together and we love to take a bath!

2003-03-06 02:29:19 PM  
Petuniapup, I'm from Ohio. So maybe there's something there (although the spelling is questionable.)

Either way, aargh.
2003-03-06 03:04:53 PM  
TM Dragon --
"... why anyone would want to mix alcohol and dairy products is beyond me."

I have to disagree. White Russians are milk, Kahlua and Vodka, and they're amazingly good. Equally tasty was the Mudslide I had in a restaurant in Massachusetts -- basically a hot fudge sundae with vodka poured in.

Iamnotadrinkinggame --
I know how you feel. Once I got burned by a certain photo of a certain guy with a particularly flexible sphincter muscle, I never open a an unfamiliar link without partially covering the screen first. But seriously, RagingLeonard's link is safe. The story is disgusting, but there are no freaky photos to traumatize you.
2003-03-06 03:40:11 PM  
Don't mind me... just checking to see if there's a filter for the word "tubgirl."
2003-03-06 03:45:44 PM  
"Illegal Bathtub Cheese"

If I ever put a blues band together, I've got the name for it!
2003-03-06 04:24:56 PM  

The best White Russians are heavy cream, Kahlua, and vodka. Milk just doesn't do it for me, but half and half works pretty well if cream is too over-the-top for ya.
2003-03-06 06:17:07 PM  
Illegal Cheese and Meat parties? Outdoor bathtub cheese? Door to door cheese vendors? Man this is some seriously surreal crap.
2003-03-06 06:46:45 PM  
No whey!
2003-03-06 10:25:50 PM  
Who let the cheese out? *ducks*
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