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(iWon)   "American Idol" contestant charged with assault. Unfortunately, didn't clean Simon's clock   ( divider line
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16629 clicks; posted to Main » on 06 Mar 2003 at 12:15 PM (14 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

101 Comments     (+0 »)
2003-03-06 10:07:39 AM  
He should learn to curb his anger.

Side comment: I don't know why everyone is always trashing Simon. I think he's simply taking emotional coddling out of the equation and speaks the truth.

The music business is hard and cold - he's just taking the band aid off in one quick motion unlike Paula Abdule (sp) who babies everyone. Personally, I prefer his approach (not his opinion some times tho.)
2003-03-06 12:17:11 PM  
What's up with all the iWon links?
2003-03-06 12:19:18 PM  
American Idol(and all "reality" programming) is definately one of the signs of the Apocylypse

"I have a suggestion to keep you all occupied....learn to swim"
2003-03-06 12:20:16 PM  
"I didn't 'feel' that punch. This is a bar fight, you really have to want it... "
2003-03-06 12:20:18 PM  
I agree with Bump, regardless of Simon being mean he knows what he's talking about. The popular view of Simon has completely marginalized his opinion.
2003-03-06 12:20:28 PM  
I charge ALL 'Amercian Idol" contestants with assault. Citizen's Arrest! Citizen's Arrest!

/love to barney fife
2003-03-06 12:20:32 PM  
Fox's screening process for these (pseudo)reality shows leaves much to be desired.
2003-03-06 12:20:42 PM  
Man what the hell is up with people getting punched in the face and falling over and hitting there heads..

Christ doesn't anyone know how to take a punch anymore..
2003-03-06 12:21:03 PM  
KO'd and killed, by an American Idol hopefull. Is there anything more embarrasing? It's like being beaten up by Richard Simmons.
2003-03-06 12:21:49 PM  
If he is convicted and sent to prison, he will be a contestant in the reality show, "Buba's American Biatch".
2003-03-06 12:21:58 PM  
I like Simon. He really knows his business.
2003-03-06 12:22:58 PM  
Jaered N. Andrews, 24, of Austintown, Ohio

Jaered? Jaeaeaeaered? Jaeaeaeaeaeaeeaaeeeaerraararraad?
2003-03-06 12:23:10 PM  
It appears his real talent lay in boxing.
2003-03-06 12:24:30 PM  
Shame on all of you for watching Reality TV. You killed Family Guy and Futurama. Original programming and creative writing is going down the crapper to make way for "Who wants to be a survivalist for America's Millionaire celebrities?"

Fark all of you in the mouth (that watch Reality TV, that is)
2003-03-06 12:24:47 PM  
it was only a matter of time before this show had someone with skeletons in the closet.
2003-03-06 12:25:30 PM  
Amen Flyinglemur AMEN!!!!!
2003-03-06 12:25:52 PM  
My ex-wife, my daughter's mother, just married a British guy named Simon that she met online a few days ago (I mean, she met him a few days ago, then married him) who has a history of assault. I'm so happy for her I could shiat my pants.
2003-03-06 12:26:20 PM  
Simon may not be liked by everyone, but his opinion sure as hell is respected by the singers. When he tells them they had a bad performance, they know it was a bad performance. When he tells them they had a good performance, they light up because getting that out of Simon means it was really good. No one cares what Paula says, because she never says anything bad. IMHO, Paula Abdul represents the pussification of America. We need more Simon's in this world that tell it like it is, instead of a bunch of "yes-men" like Paula.

2003-03-06 12:26:27 PM  
Yes... clean his clock indeed...
2003-03-06 12:27:08 PM  
to all the people saying Simon just tells people the truth: There's a difference between telling the unmitigated truth and being a complete dick about telling the truth. ie: "you need to lose weight, everything else is fine"
2003-03-06 12:27:08 PM  
Oh yeah, and Family Guy was the best show on the planet.
2003-03-06 12:28:00 PM  
So if your going to punch someone you want to make sure they die right now instead of lying in a coma for nine years then dying. This guy gets 5000.00 dollars bail and the guy from the coma thread gets 250,000.00 dollars bail. Gotta love consistancy.
2003-03-06 12:28:12 PM  
um, was this the "party" guy that threatened the little gay kid for being a kiss ass? If so, I'm not surprised.
um, no I don't watch this crap. *pssht*
2003-03-06 12:29:12 PM  
BUTTCHEESE: you sir, are an ass
2003-03-06 12:29:24 PM  
American Idol" contestant charged with assault. Unfortunately, didn't clean Simon's clock.

Amen! Every time I see Simon, I want to kick his ass. I don't understand people's fascination with watching some guy treat other people like crap. Sure, he's a critic and he's supposed to be honest, but he's just a dick. Just like that stupid British woman, I forget her name, the one that hosts "Weakest Link." It is possible to be truthful with someone without ripping their self-esteem apart.
2003-03-06 12:29:27 PM  
Flyinglemur: That's not an offer, is it? :-*
2003-03-06 12:31:14 PM  
Simon is usually right, but he is a bit cruel. It's not as if he's even clever about it either.

Back to the topic, does anyone have a picture of this Jaered?
2003-03-06 12:31:22 PM  
you're kidding yourself if you think that American Idol is only about singing talent. it's about image, and Simon knows this. "you need to lose weight" may be harsh, but it is probably in the best interest of the singer if she wants to succeed.
2003-03-06 12:31:39 PM  
Is this "Hit your head on a sidewalk" day at Fark?
2003-03-06 12:32:24 PM  
Joey JoJo Junior Shabadoo: That's the worst name I ever heard. ;-)

I agree. It's amusing for bit but then it's just shrill and annoying.
2003-03-06 12:33:48 PM  
Bps300: what about the big fat guy? Who, I might add, made it with a Karen Carpenter song.
2003-03-06 12:35:02 PM  
Ummm i thought manslaughter was the appropriate charge if someone dies during an act of violence or negligence where the intent wasn't to kill the person. Either we're not getting a complete story or the dead guys family is getting the short end of justic with just a assault charge.
2003-03-06 12:36:01 PM  
Did he look like this guy??
[image from too old to be available]
2003-03-06 12:36:45 PM  
Why wouldn't you put a pic of the guy? It just makes no sense.
2003-03-06 12:37:18 PM  
I like when Simon gets yelled at by a crappy ass singer after he (Simon) tells them they suck.

I only watched that show in the beginning when they all sucked, for the humor factor.
2003-03-06 12:37:21 PM  
Is this "Hit your head on a sidewalk" day at Fark?

2003-03-06 12:37:37 PM  
unfortunately, there's a double standard when it comes to male and female singers. in today's pop music, are there any chubby female? i'm not totally into the pop scene, but i would bet the answer would be 'no'. skinny women sell records, fat ones don't. it sucks, but that's the business.
2003-03-06 12:39:22 PM  
From what I understand of American Idol, they bring people into successive rounds, who don't deserve to be there, for the express purpose of having Simon shoot them down on camera.
2003-03-06 12:39:43 PM  
The fat comment was completely out of line imo...

It has nothing to do with how well you sing.
2003-03-06 12:39:51 PM  
Femme_fatale: I'm guessing it was that guy. Aryan, Blondish dude who got all red in the face because his non-party partner was "giving him the eye" or something. I remember he made it to the semis and then never appeared again.
2003-03-06 12:39:54 PM  
Bps300: okay, what about Frenchie then, she was a good deal larger than the girl he told to lose weight. and yes, there are a couple of chubby girls, but they are a minority.
2003-03-06 12:40:29 PM  
Smoking Gun's got the picture. But I don't recognize him. BTW, reality TV isn't so bad. It's a nice break from all of the crappy 30-minute family sitcoms with the wacky next door neighbor. Or the 30-minute friends sitcoms with the wacky next door neighbor. Or the 30-minute office sitcoms with the wacky next door cubicle neighbor. And reality tv didn't kill off Futurama and The Family Guy, FOX's crappy schedule and marketing did. They couldn't keep a good show on the air if they tried (which they don't).
2003-03-06 12:41:01 PM  
Shortly before the fight


2003-03-06 12:41:56 PM  
i think i figured it all out!

1) get punched in the face
2) hit head on sidewalk and die
3) profit!!!
2003-03-06 12:43:09 PM  
ToeKutter: that's damn funny.
2003-03-06 12:43:54 PM  
The problem with Ms. Oliverez (sp?)--the one who was told she was fat--is that she didn't fit into any of our culture's body categories. The fat dude doesn't get any flack because as Simon said on the radio 'he is what he is,' which means we know that he fits into the jolly fat man image that we're comfortable with. The girl who got told she needed to lose weight was neither fat nor skinny, so she slipped through the cracks.
2003-03-06 12:44:48 PM  
Everytime I see anything like American Idol its always someone singing Aretha Franklin or Al Green.

Why not do some Weezer or Sonic Youth?
2003-03-06 12:44:50 PM  
frenchie was cool in that she could transcend her fatness. she had an Aretha quality where her voice demanded attention and made you focus on the voice, not the looks. Looks and talent are two parts of the equation - increase one, and the other is not that important. the girl simon told to lose weight couldn't command with her voice as well, therefore to be successful she must 'improve' her looks.

if by other chubby girls you are referring to Kelly Osbourne, she's got family star status, and no matter what she sung or how she looked, she would sell somehting. however, IMHO, she's just a flash in the pan. the music business is formulaic and the formula has proven successful.
2003-03-06 12:44:53 PM  
Someone post a picture of this dude.
2003-03-06 12:45:22 PM  
New photoshop contest: Photoshop people who you would like to see fall, hit their heads on the sidewalk, and die.
2003-03-06 12:45:36 PM  
The only good reality TV would be watching this guy get into that fight. But lose. Bloodily.

Otherwise, it's totally stupid. Unless it involves really hot naked women.

Then it has my undivided attention.
2003-03-06 12:46:52 PM  
I don't watch complete crap, therefore I know of none of this. Ok I wish I knew of none of this...

hmm say "none of this" real fast, over and over, its freaky...
2003-03-06 12:47:09 PM  
ew, I wasn't thinking of Kelly Osbourne, but now I am. I hate you Bps300.
2003-03-06 12:48:10 PM  
I have a friend who tried out and got rejected. But he is without a doubt better than the losers that get booted off on camera (and better than some that make it through the eliminations). They don't pick people because they are good or bad, but based on whether they are entertaining on screen. Which betrays the non-reality of the whole thing.
2003-03-06 12:48:14 PM  
Simon is the only reason that show is worth watching!!!

The producers should get on their knees and thank him for making it the roaring success it is. And he knows it.
2003-03-06 12:49:43 PM  
I am above watching reality TV bullshiat and especially American Idol

translates loosely into I am too busy watching REAL programs like sally Jesse and Jerry Jerry Jerry
2003-03-06 12:50:06 PM  
Ishkur: I think Simon IS the producers. The show was his idea and gives a contract on his record label.
2003-03-06 12:50:15 PM  
Inaditch, I really hope you have custody .. and if not, I'll bet you could get it now
2003-03-06 12:51:04 PM  
from cringe

(So is honesty: after last Wednesday's show, one of the 32 finalists -- Jaered Andrews -- was disqualified after a background check revealed he was a former member of a Ohio-based hip-hop act, Ordinary Peoples. Another contestant will take Andrews' place.)
2003-03-06 12:53:46 PM  
Simon servers a very important purpose to the contestants (as well as being fun to watch for the viewers)... The entertainment industry is cold and cruel. If you don't have a thick enough skin to deal with Simon, you won't make it. He's giving them a small taste of what they can expect being a professional entertainer. If they can handle it, they've got a chance. If not, they need to move on to something a bit more warm and fuzzy, like writing children's books.
2003-03-06 12:54:27 PM  
lol sorry dude - had to share the pain
2003-03-06 12:54:43 PM  
is that show STILL on? what happened to the quality shows like 'get a life' and 'sledgehammer'?
2003-03-06 12:55:59 PM  
If you are actualy interested in seeing talented people on tv, star search has a much higher caliber lineup. On the one episode of the new star search I saw, the Jr Singers not to mention the adults were all better than anyone I've seen on American Idol. But the comics and the dancers on star search are uber lame.
2003-03-06 12:58:19 PM  
Cranky people don't watch American Idol for the good singers. The shiatty ones are way more entertaining.
2003-03-06 12:58:39 PM  
SurgeonDryHog: no, he doesn't run the show. ABC execs do (or whatever network its on).

Simon is a RECORD LABEL OWNER...the very record label that the Americon Idol will be signed on. So of course he sees everything from the business side of things. Look at the judges:

Paula is the performance she appeals to the artists' drive to succeed and be noticed, and she knows how hard it is to break it in the industry, which is why she can't say anything bad about anyone. She doesn't have the heart to crush someone's dreams.

Randy is the producer. So he's always thinking of what music would be suitable for the contestant....if indeed any music is right for them at all. So he looks at it from a sound management point of view. Does the person look easy to work with in the studio, and all that.

And Simon? You can see it in his eyes, every time someone steps in front of him, he subconsciously asks them the same question: "Why should I spend a million dollars on you?"

And that's a legitimate way of looking at the music industry. Simon doesn't HAVE to spend all this money on marketing, promoting, producing, songwriting, etc.....but he's going to. So if you want to have a recording contract and be a big star, you're going to have to go through him, because its HIS money on the line. Not yours. Not Randy's or Paula's. Not the TV shows. HIS. That's why he's the most crass, because when you waste his time being an also-ran in the audition because you think its fun "just to try it out", you're wasting his money.

He's the one that matters the most. It's his label, he calls the shots. Convince him thoroughly why he should spend his time, effort, and cash on you, and you've got it made.
2003-03-06 12:58:55 PM  
Handrail: Was 'sledgehammer' the show where the guy talked to his gun?
2003-03-06 01:00:08 PM  
I'm with "Bump." Simon's brilliant. Why wait for the cold forces of the market to tell you you're not pretty enough when an angry Brit will do it for you and take all the work out of reading the chicken bones?
2003-03-06 01:02:00 PM  

you got it. that show was awesome. i think (fervently pray) that all the episodes are on DVD.

/off to amazon
2003-03-06 01:02:37 PM  
Clay Akin rules!
2003-03-06 01:02:37 PM  
Ishkur: Okay, here's the roster.

Cecile Frot-Coutaz, Executive Producer
Nigel Lythgoe, Co-executive Producer
Ken Warwick, Co-executive Producer

The show was Simon's idea though (or 'Pop Idol' was at least). I'm surprised he didn't want an executive producer credit.
2003-03-06 01:04:40 PM  
Last night Simon was acting like such a baby. He was bashing the executive producers (Nigel and Ken), calling them jerks and such. Usually I like the guy, but that wasn't a nice color on him.

I felt like I was watching Maury.
2003-03-06 01:04:45 PM  
Simon Cowell, the judge, isn't the producer. That's Simon Fuller.

Simon basically plays the role of the villain, telling these kids the cold hard truth, that just because you were great in your high school production of "Brigadoon" that doesn't mean you're a star. And if you sing a Stevie Wonder or Whitney Houston song just like Stevie or Whitney, you're not a star, you're an impersonator.
2003-03-06 01:07:48 PM  
Missy Elliot is an incredibly popular performer, both now that she has lost some weight, and before when she was heavier.

Queen Latifah has sold tons and tons of records.

Also, it is absolutely unbelievable that something like this could happen in Farrel. (Sarcasm- what a frightening place.)
2003-03-06 01:09:31 PM  
LawTalkingGuy is it just me, or does anyone else cringe when Missy Elliot sings about wearing a thong?
2003-03-06 01:12:19 PM  
Really reality shows are, um, annoying. How many can they put on ? We get this instead of shows like "Futurama" and long gone, but not forgotten, "Get a Life". Hopefully, like the quiz show rush that started with "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire", reality shows will dissapear from overexposure.
2003-03-06 01:13:53 PM  
I didn't see anything about this on thesmokinggun....
2003-03-06 01:15:16 PM  
Smokinggun link in
2003-03-06 01:28:35 PM  
you're forgetting about image. both of these performers really didn't need to be skinny because of their image. they don't dress like they were stick thin nor do they have to - the customer doesn't demand it.

someone previously nailed it - performers make us feel comfortable by fitting into an expected mold. Aretha is the basis for this mold. A stick would be the basis for someone like Celine.
2003-03-06 01:29:22 PM  
that's one thong gone wrong
2003-03-06 01:32:25 PM  
Bps300 and Ebawb:
Missy has lost weight - what do you people want from her? She's not looking too bad these days.
2003-03-06 01:35:07 PM  
2003-03-06 01:36:29 PM  

How do you explain the longevity of the Simpsons?
2003-03-06 01:37:50 PM  

This incident clearly shows that for some reason, our so called "justice" system is a failure. I don't know if it is because it is in a different jurisdiction, or what - but there doesn't seem to be any consistancy at all.

Here we have a guy being charged with simple assault, unlikely to face futher charges, for throwing a punch at a guy, who fell, hit his head, and died (probably for the same reason as that other poor bastard - severed brain stem - though there could easily be other reasons as well). Meanwhile, some other dude is facing the possibility of a jail sentence for throwing a punch as a late teenager in highschool, at a another teenager, who fell (and no one knows really why the guy fell, whether from the punch, or from tripping over someone else in what sounded like your typical high school melee/brawl/"fight! fight! fight!" barbarous chanting slugfest), hit his head, went into a coma from a severed brain stem, then died nine years later.

In the case of the American Idol dude, it seems we can clearly see the cause-effect situation of him throwing the punch, whereas in the other case, it becomes a more complicated situation (and I cannot even say what would be right or just unless I was sitting on the jury and heard all the facts, so I can't comment on it). Regardless - there should be some consistency!

Whether that means both get assault, or both get manslaughter (or whatever it is called for an unintentional murder) - that is what it should be, otherwise there truely isn't any justice in our system...

2003-03-06 01:38:31 PM  
Umm, okay, so this guy was kicked off American idol for punching someone in the face who fell and hit his head on the sidewalk and died, and he faces "up to a year in prison"? Well, in that other link earlier today, wasn't some guy facing up to 15 years in prison for getting into a fight when he was a high school student, and accidentally put some other kid in a coma for 9 years before dying? Am I the only one who saw similarities, or am I drunk and read the article wrong?
2003-03-06 01:39:47 PM  
Okay, well, Cr()sh beat me to it....
2003-03-06 01:47:08 PM  

You took the words right out of my mouth. What is it with the people-getting-punched-out-and-hitting-their-heads links today?
2003-03-06 01:48:44 PM  
how could i possibly learn to swim when im so engrossed in one great big festering neon distraction
2003-03-06 01:54:25 PM  
There is nothing I find more ironic than Paula Abdul judging a singing contest.
2003-03-06 02:04:09 PM  
The fat comment was completely out of line imo...

It has nothing to do with how well you sing.

Neither does being a pop star.

2003-03-06 02:44:02 PM  
Speaking of throwing punches, what happened to the other link?
2003-03-06 02:44:29 PM  
Pluvius, exactly right.
Succeding on American Idol has nothing to do with talent or skill or ability. It's all about marketability. If you're a hot, blonde girl, that's gonna sell records simply because people will like looking at you.
2003-03-06 03:07:57 PM  
Good point Moleculo. I was wondering the same thing myself. How is it that he is only facing a year's time for involuntary manslaughter?? The article is not very clear on what happened.
2003-03-06 03:32:31 PM  
If you haven't read Ishkur's response yet about Simon, I suggest you do before commenting about Simon.

I wish more people could understand exactly what is going on and put it in a form like that post more often on Fark. That is all.
2003-03-06 05:21:33 PM  
[image from too old to be available]

awww I was hoping it was the asshole. I had all of these OZ-type hopes for him.

About the talent on amercan Idol. Some are good but christ what a sorry excuse for "The best".
Popstars in Canada has a better line up of singers. They go to a "boot camp" and train together and have to sing the exact same songs as one another. That is both funny and satisfying.
[/no i do not get stoned and watch this crap, I am simply talking out of my ass...truly *ahem*]
2003-03-06 06:10:48 PM  
missy elliot in a thong now = ok.
missy elliot in a thong before = you wouldn't be able to see it.
2003-03-06 06:12:23 PM  
who cares?
2003-03-06 06:21:52 PM  
What happened to the other thread and link about the kid being charged with manslaughter for the single punch from nine years back?

Did Fark remove it for some reason?
2003-03-06 07:16:09 PM  
This dude live less than 5 minutes away from my house. I saw him on the local news lastnight.. now on fark today! It really makes you proud when someone from the community does something worthwhile and notable! The Youngstown area.. the land of opportunity!

P.S. How the funk do you die from falling to the ground? Did the say anything about getting punched on the roof and falling 10 stories or anything haha? Sounds like he was one of them dudes that needed to wear a bears helmet.
2003-03-06 08:08:39 PM  

And you and Ishkur should read Fiver-'s comment. :) The judge Simon isn't the same as the producer Simon.

Simon Fuller created Pop Idol, produces American Idol, and is the one who owns the record label that signs all of the top 10/12 and, maybe, spends money on them.

Simon Cowell is just some other producer they hired to be the "mean" one out of the 3.
2003-03-06 08:31:46 PM  
KickKat & Fiver- Check your sources buddy

(google cache'd because the site is a bit unstable at the moment)
2003-03-06 10:01:26 PM  
Damn HTML... Sorry, don't have that link for ya I guess and I don't wanna find it again...
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