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(USA Today)   Astronomers discover Planet of the Emos   (usatoday.com) divider line 106
    More: Cool, Emos, astronomers, wasps, death spiral, planets, Carnegie Institution, light years, USA TODAY  
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26784 clicks; posted to Main » on 26 Aug 2009 at 6:59 PM (5 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



106 Comments   (+0 »)
   

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2009-08-26 05:57:59 PM  
ScarFleet to dispatch the U.S.S. Iron Maiden (NCC-666) to wipe out the planet and also kick DeathKlock's arse!

Repavin' Fascination Street with the blood of the whiney!
 
2009-08-26 06:38:16 PM  
The star is called WASP-18 and the planet is WASP-18b...

Yet another depressed 18 year old WASP... this planet needs to grow up and realize that life sucks.
 
2009-08-26 06:57:11 PM  
Nah, they are just setting up for the next show by Disaster Area.
 
2009-08-26 07:03:29 PM  
Is it wearing girl pants on its southern hemisphere?

/got nuthin'
//stupid emos
 
2009-08-26 07:04:13 PM  
 
2009-08-26 07:04:31 PM  
I could care, but that wouldn't be cool.

/Where did I put my oversized sunglasses?
//I'm so emo, I sweat apathy
 
2009-08-26 07:04:40 PM  
Tr0mBoNe: The star is called WASP-18 and the planet is WASP-18b..

heavyharmonies.com

I'd kill myself too.

/hot
 
2009-08-26 07:05:16 PM  
The planet circles a star that is in the constellation Phoenix...the temperature is about 3,800 degrees...

I've been to Phoenix. That sounds about right.
 
2009-08-26 07:07:00 PM  
Seems almost obligatory...

ares.explainthisimage.com
 
2009-08-26 07:07:06 PM  
Tr0mBoNe: The star is called WASP-18 and the planet is WASP-18b...

Yet another depressed 18 year old WASP... this planet needs to grow up and realize that life sucks.


BAH you beat me to it. well done, s.o.b.
 
2009-08-26 07:08:04 PM  
You guys just don't understand what it's going through. Its life is spiraling out of control.
 
2009-08-26 07:08:10 PM  
"Bomb number 20, do you read me?"
 
2009-08-26 07:08:48 PM  
Whoops.
i20.photobucket.com
 
2009-08-26 07:08:54 PM  
Emos are posers, not suicidal.

If they were suicidal, they'd all be dead.
 
2009-08-26 07:09:53 PM  
www.thegauntlet.com
 
2009-08-26 07:10:15 PM  
"The star's tidal bulge of plasma may extend hundreds of miles"

Aside from the ovbi penor joke this is actually pretty damn amazing (and scary). Imagine a mass so hot that it's become plasma that is also hundreds of miles long...

/hot
//long
///penis
 
2009-08-26 07:10:25 PM  
buckler: "Bomb number 20, do you read me?"

And I said: "Let there be light!"
 
2009-08-26 07:12:17 PM  
Doomed celestial bodies? It's more likely than you think! (pops)

/Bonus: For emos, this one has a relevant name
 
2009-08-26 07:12:33 PM  
Good lord, they're even trying to sensationalize astronomy now. Suicidal stars. Death stars. Frickin' death galaxies. I can't even watch any of the newer space documentaries; it's like they're trying to turn the cosmos into a Michael Bay film.
 
2009-08-26 07:13:18 PM  
Next time I see one of those who sag the skinny jeans, this is what will come to mind

FTFA "yet another weird one in the exoplanet menagerie"
 
2009-08-26 07:13:21 PM  
What a death spiral might look like:

www.sk8stuff.com

/Cold
 
2009-08-26 07:17:39 PM  
The Invisible Sky Wizard: Good lord, they're even trying to sensationalize astronomy now. Suicidal stars. Death stars. Frickin' death galaxies. I can't even watch any of the newer space documentaries; it's like they're trying to turn the cosmos into a Michael Bay film.

Beware the teabagging nebula!
 
2009-08-26 07:20:45 PM  
+1 on the headline. Brilliant!
 
2009-08-26 07:27:42 PM  
The Invisible Sky Wizard: Good lord, they're even trying to sensationalize astronomy now. Suicidal stars. Death stars. Frickin' death galaxies. I can't even watch any of the newer space documentaries; it's like they're trying to turn the cosmos into a Michael Bay film.

The planet Pluto.

They thought it was gone for good. But it's back, and it's pissed off
 
2009-08-26 07:29:37 PM  
A million to one chance to burn up before that.
 
2009-08-26 07:30:06 PM  
suicide is one of the most important decisions a teenager will ever make
 
2009-08-26 07:31:08 PM  
Twice in one day:

www.strangecult.com
 
2009-08-26 07:31:34 PM  
FTFA: It is a slow death. The planet WASP-18b has maybe a million years to live...

A million years? I won't be alive a million years from now!

If I want to see a planet destroyed in my lifetime, it looks like I'm just going to have to blow one up myself.

I'd better get to work on a doomsday device.
 
2009-08-26 07:37:24 PM  
Dear Author of Inane Anthropomorphic Article (AIAA),

You lost me at "ever-closer tango of death" when talking about a planet...

Then you double lost me at "It's causing its own destruction by creating these tides"


On the other hand, my stapler is hungry and mopey today, so who am I to judge?
 
2009-08-26 07:38:45 PM  
Then again it IS the staplers own damn fault for forgetting his/her/its lunch...
 
2009-08-26 07:38:52 PM  
eraser8: FTFA: It is a slow death. The planet WASP-18b has maybe a million years to live...

A million years? I won't be alive a million years from now!

If I want to see a planet destroyed in my lifetime, it looks like I'm just going to have to blow one up myself.

I'd better get to work on a doomsday device.


Here you go: Link (new window)
 
2009-08-26 07:40:01 PM  
It's pretty damn cool that we're living in an era where new planets are being discovered all the time.

\so old, I remember when picture-in-picture capable VCRs were being described as on the horizon in Dynamite
\\the magazine for teens
 
2009-08-26 07:43:15 PM  
UncleCal: Seems almost obligatory...

Those are juggalos (notice the ICP shirt on the left kid). They are worse than emos IMO, but I haven't seen near as many emos as I have juggalos. In fact, there's one in the room above me as I speak. It sucks.
 
2009-08-26 07:43:36 PM  
Boritom: ScarFleet to dispatch the U.S.S. Iron Maiden (NCC-666) to wipe out the planet and also kick DeathKlock's arse!

Repavin' Fascination Street with the blood of the whiney!


Deathklock has nothing to do with whiney emo biatches. Jack Skellington does, however. Also, emo kids are never actually suicidal. They "play" at having problems, which is why the piss me off.
 
2009-08-26 07:43:52 PM  
Did someone just post a pic of Juggalos? Those guys are almost lamer than emo kids.
 
2009-08-26 07:44:28 PM  
Gooble741: UncleCal: Seems almost obligatory...

Those are juggalos (notice the ICP shirt on the left kid). They are worse than emos IMO, but I haven't seen near as many emos as I have juggalos. In fact, there's one in the room above me as I speak. It sucks.


HA, beat me to it.
 
2009-08-26 07:44:29 PM  
UncleCal: Seems almost obligatory...

Grogor worthy...
 
2009-08-26 07:45:05 PM  
That planet is going to need a really big prozac pill to pull it out of it's suicidal spiral. Also where are the planet's parents in all of this?
 
2009-08-26 07:45:51 PM  
"Good lord, they're even trying to sensationalize astronomy now. "

YA! Science should be all boring playdough mockups, damnit! All those big ass asplosions in the universe are a government conspiracy anyway
 
2009-08-26 07:46:40 PM  
cryophile: Boritom: ScarFleet to dispatch the U.S.S. Iron Maiden (NCC-666) to wipe out the planet and also kick DeathKlock's arse!

Repavin' Fascination Street with the blood of the whiney!

Deathklock has nothing to do with whiney emo biatches. Jack Skellington does, however. Also, emo kids are never actually suicidal. They "play" at having problems, which is why the piss me off.


Very few teenagers need to "play" at having problems. Having problems is the basis of adolescence.
 
2009-08-26 07:46:53 PM  
Is it just me, or do all emo kids like to describe themselves as bisexual even if they're clearly virgins?
 
A0Z
2009-08-26 07:49:33 PM  
Tr0mBoNe: The star is called WASP-18 and the planet is WASP-18b...

Sounds like a new destination for Astronaut Jones!

img.photobucket.com
 
2009-08-26 07:56:31 PM  
LeftCoast_eh: UncleCal: Seems almost obligatory...

Grogor worthy...


Thanks! (I think... Ha!)
I never heard of Juggalos before this (or Juggalettes either).
Scary stuff! Hard to tell which is lamer, they remind me of Kiss wannabes.

Not at all like Juggys, from the Man Show.
 
2009-08-26 07:59:41 PM  
Remember when the term "emo" referred to skinny boys in sweaters and glasses, carrying messenger bags full of books about existencialism, and refusing to acknowledge your existence?

Sigh, I miss being ignored by those guys...

/I just looked up Juggalos on Wiki... This, this I don't like.
 
2009-08-26 08:00:50 PM  
cryophile: Is it just me, or do all emo kids like to describe themselves as bisexual even if they're clearly virgins?

So, you can't know what you are until you have sex?

You just randomly fall on top of various genitalia until something stirs, eh?
 
2009-08-26 08:07:21 PM  
slobarnuts: "Good lord, they're even trying to sensationalize astronomy now. "

YA! Science should be all boring playdough mockups, damnit! All those big ass asplosions in the universe are a government conspiracy anyway


I'm not saying it has to be boring. I'm just saying it doesn't need to be explained with bad cgi and wave after wave of jump cuts.
 
2009-08-26 08:10:22 PM  
i23.photobucket.com

/I also know a thing or two about death spirals
 
2009-08-26 08:12:10 PM  
buckler: Whoops.

you
are
awesome...

Bomb, disarm...
 
2009-08-26 08:12:10 PM  
farm3.static.flickr.com
 
2009-08-26 08:14:25 PM  
loser_death_spiral: /I also know a thing or two about death spirals

You created that handle just for this thread didn't you?

/sorry oblig
 
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