Good link. Thank you.

Dave Barry is one of my favorite writers, and this only improves his standing in my opinion.

Kudos to Dave.

Same here. Thanks, Dave.

gjdave

UNITED Airlines.
AMERICAN Airlines.


United Americans.....

I just received this email. I don't know who wrote it. Maybe everyone did...

Subject: FW. Open Letter to a Terrorist


Long but well -worth reading -- many times....


An open letter to a terrorist: Well, you hit the World Trade Center, but
you missed America. You hit the Pentagon, but you missed America. You
used helpless American bodies, to take out other American bodies, but like a
poormarksman, you STILL missed America. Why? Because of something you guys
will never understand. America isn't about a building or two, not about
financial centers, not about military centers, America isn't about a place, America
isn't even about a bunch of bodies. America is about an IDEA. An idea,
that you can go someplace where you can earn as much as you can figure out how
to, live for the most part, like you envisioned living, and pursue
Happiness. (No guarantees that you'll reach it, but you can sure try!) Go
ahead and whine your terrorist whine, and chant your terrorist litany:
"If you can not see my point, then feel my pain." This concept is alien to
Americans. We live in a country where we don't have to see your point.
But you're free to have one. We don't have to listen to your speech. But
you're free to say one. Don't know where you got the strange idea that everyone
has to agree with you. We don't agree with each other in this country, almost
as a matter of pride. We're a collection of guys that don't agree, called
States. We united our individual states to protect ourselves from tyranny
in the world. Another idea, we made up on the spot. You CAN make it up as
you go, when it's your country. If you're free enough. Yeah, we're fat,
sloppy, easy-going goofs most of the time. That's an unfortunate image to project
tothe world, but it comes of feeling free and easy about the world you live
in. It's unfortunate too, because people start to forget that when you
attack Americans, they tend to fight like a cornered badger. The first we
knew of the War of 1812, was when England burned Washington D.C. to the
ground. Didn't turn out like England thought it was going to, and it's
not going to turn out like you think, either. Sorry, but you're not the first
bully on our shores, just the most recent. No Marquis of Queensbury rules
for Americans, either. We were the FIRST and so far, only country in the
world to use nuclear weapons in anger. Horrific idea, nowadays? News for
you bucko, it was back then too, but we used it anyway. Only had two of them
in the whole world and we used 'em both. Grandpa Jones worked on the
Manhattan Project. Told me once, that right up until they threw the switch, the
physicists were still arguing over whether the Uranium alone would
fission, or whether it would start a fissioning chain reaction that would
eateverything. But they threw the switch anyway, because we had a War to
win. Does that tell you something about American Resolve? So who just
declared War on us? It would be nice to point to some real estate, like
the good old days. Unfortunately, we're probably at war with random camps, in
far-flung places. Who think they're safe. Just like the Barbary Pirates
did, IIRC. Better start sleeping with one eye open. There's a spirit that
tends to take over people who come to this country, looking for opportunity,
looking for liberty, looking for freedom. Even if they misuse it. The
Marielistas that Castro emptied out of his prisons, were overjoyed to
find out how much freedom there was. First thing they did when they hit our
shores, was run out and buy guns. The ones that didn't end up dead, ended
up in prisons. It was a big PITA then (especially in south Florida), but
you're only the newest PITA, not the first. You guys seem to be incapable of
understanding that we don't live in America, America lives in US!
American Spirit is what it's called. And killing a few thousand of us, or a few
million of us, won't change it. Most of the time, it's a pretty
happy-go-lucky kind of Spirit. Until we're crossed in a cowardly manner,
then it becomes an entirely different kind of Spirit. Wait until you see
what we do with that Spirit, this time. Sleep tight, if you can. We're
coming.

I think that letter went astray there with that crap bragging about use being the only one to ever use nuclear weapons. Not something I think we should be bringing up at a time like this.

Damn nice article.

dave...rock on!! thanks

Rebbic-Scary as that statement is, and much as I think it doesn't apply to today (or hope it doesn't for that matter) it DOES make it's point regarding the resolve of the United States. If we were willing at one time to unleash that kind of destruction, we may be willing to do it again under these circumstances. We can only hope that it is directed toward the right people.

Oh- and the Dave Barry article seemed to sum up a lot of what I've been reading on Fark for the last 4 days. We may not be perfect, but we are still very proud to be Americans. And we still do have some ange rleft in us even if we aren't the monsters that the terrorists are.

possibly DB's best column ever... thanks for the link.

Batcar- The guy who wrote that is named Charles Brennan. I've never heard of him either.

Damn Dave Barry is the best. That's one of only two serious columns I've ever read of his, and I have like 7 books of his. The other one was about his father dying, and both of them hit like a ton of bricks. God Bless, Dave. We all look forward to the day you can return to booger journalism and make us laugh again.

Kudos to you Dave! Well written, and every word rings true.

A friend told me something once. Do you know what the most frightening thing in the world is? I said I didn't know. He said, to him, the most frightening thing he had ever been through was watching a man slow to anger standing up form the bar, and turning his hands into fists, and then knowing that man is angry at you, and coming your way.

Sleep tight you farking dickless terrorists. you want to see terror? The US of A might be slow to anger, but we're angry now. And we're coming your way. Sleep tight bastards.

dave is a brilliant writer


batcar... charles brennan... who wrote the letter you composed is 18 years old. some of it is not written as well... but it speaks a very loud and clear message.

errrr... who composed the letter you posted....


sorry! anyway... he's 18 :)

I think the letter misses the point. They used a nuke back in the 40s, sure. But at that time they could be forgiven, somewhat, because they really didn't fully comprehend what they were doing. Our use of nuclear weapons at the end of WWII points more to our ignorance than our resolve. That is why I was with the letters sentiments up until it started in on nukes.

It smacks of bragging about doing something that may have seemed a good idea at the time, and maybe can be forgiven for that, but was really sort of horrid. Think about it. When they dropped those nukes on Japan they killed men women and children, and the people dropping them KNEW that they would kill non military targets. There were lots of rationalizations for it at the time, and I do not intend to second guess them now, but such an event should be viewed with a certain "lest we forget" solemnity, in my opinion. not as a rallying point for future actions.

Rebbic:

Actually, I believe "we" did exactly know what was going to happen. I heard, we had exploded at least one in demonstration to the Japanese on a deserted island.

And also, remember, we dropped TWO bombs on Japanese cities. At least the second time we knew EXACTLY what was going to happen.

The key here is that we were at war. And during War innocent people die.

1) We didn't start it. In fact, some criticize us for being "isolationist" until then.

2) Japan refused to surrender (ie stop killing American soldiers and civilians)

2) We saved more innocent lives in the long run.

War sucks. It should be that way. There is no such thing as "civliized war". And in fact, in a way, I think it's best that war is as ugly and brutal as it can be. That way perhaps, just maybe, the human race will be less likely to engage in it.

The one thing I find frightening is that I believe that we SHOULD take our self-imposed handcuffs off and hit the farkers like they hit us. Their families, their friends. The only way to end this is to so thoroughly defeat these bastards that they can never repeat this monstrosity. I don't think nukes are the answer. These people should die looking their killers in the eyes and seeing no remorse.

I swear I am not making this up: Dave Barry is God

Lizrdgizrd:

When you fight monsters, seeking earnestly to defeat them, there is always a danger that you, yourself, will become one of them.

This wisdom comes up often in many places, and I believe it relevant.

I trust our Government understands the danger, and we'll keep those "handcuffs" on.

The cool thing is, it won't do Bin Laden and the other terrorists any good.

.......and Hell's coming with me!!!!

batcar01 ... that was written by a invester on the yahoo message board for Boeing.

OPEN LETTER TO TERRORIST
by: diversified_avenger
Long-Term Sentiment: Buy 09/12/01 02:17 pm
Msg: 129751 of 130241

wow, dave in somber tone. thoughtful words.
now lets lock and load already

Cool Dave!!!!!!

Also, Batcar01, that letter to a terrorist was right on!!!!!!!

Oh, and by the way, Rebbic, F*ck You, You F*cking whinny F*UCK. You must have been watching F*cking Mary Poppins movie all week.

For the first time Dave didn't make me laugh, and I thank him for it.

With the anger and outrage over this attack, I have seen a lot of people saying we should take the gloves off and fight them the way they fought us, hit their wives and children and innocents. "That'll make those bastards think twice."

Sadly, it won't. We keep going round and round asking why they did this, and the one answer that they will give us is Payback. Payback for all the suffering their wives and children have already endured if not at our hands, then at what many in the Muslim world see as at our behest.

The mood among the Palestinians and Egyptians and others who cheered the attack is "America had it coming." We can think of this as sick, but how did they get that sick? Because as far back as they can remember, their fathers, wives, sons and daughters have been dying in attacks they blame on us. To them, they are finally giving us a taste of our own medicine.

I am not saying I agree with that, nor am I any kind of apologist for hard-line Muslims. But Israel has been trading helicopter attacks for car bombs with the Palestininians for years. I don't see Hamas "thinking twice" about sending sending suicide bombers into Israel. And hell, hard-line Israelis killed Rabin for trying to talk peace.

We have to retaliate against the terrorists who did this. But we will never get them all if we try to do it entirely ourselves ... and the harder we try, the more anti-American sentiment we will create that will only breed more terrorists.

What we need to do is to make the Arafats and Talibans and Kaddafis and even the Saddam Husseins of the world to realize that they have more to lose by supporting terrorism than they do by eradicating it within their borders.

To sum up, from Michael Moore:

As Michael Moore puts it: "We have orphaned so
many children, tens of thousands around the world, with our taxpayer-funded terrorism (in Chile, in Vietnam, in Gaza, in Salvador) that I suppose we shouldn't be too surprised when those orphans grow up and are a little
whacked in the head from the horror we have helped cause."

Dave Barry wrote a serious collumn? I think the end of the world is nearing.

It smacks of bragging about doing something that may have seemed a good idea at the time, and maybe can be forgiven for that, but was really sort of horrid. Think about it. When they dropped those nukes on Japan they killed men women and children, and the people dropping them KNEW that they would kill non military targets. There were lots of rationalizations for it at the time....

Yes, and killing non-combatants is always wrong. Always.

This is where Dave Barry is half wrong. Yes, we do not kill civilians, and we do not celebrate death, and America is a good country. But if we tell ourselves that these villains committed this this monstrous crime just because we're American, I'm afraid we're making a deadly mistake. Because the missing half of the truth is that Washington and its allies and clients do have a record, and a very public one, of lawless and violent behavior around the world. It's fair to say Washington already had us in a war, and that until Tuesday, we had the privilege of not noticing. If we want to protect ourselves from further, maybe worse atrocities, we have to face the uncomfortable facts of Washington's foreign policy and make some changes. That will take moral courage at a time like this.

Who makes these policies? Certainly not the janitors, secretaries, gofers, and assorted professionals who suffered and died in this heinous attack. They didn't deserve this. But by aggressive pursuit of "our interests" in other people's backyards, Washington has been gambling with their lives.

One more thing. I've heard commentators like NPR's Juan Williams seriously advocate getting out the nukes. We should remember that just as the WTC dead and bereaved did not make Washington policy, neither did the ordinary citizens of any of those -Istans commit this crime. In our outrage, justified as it is, let's not become what we hate.

MRAlex, I didn't see your post as I was writing mine. Almost looks like we conspired.

nice, Boorite

Dave Barry controls the wisdom of the ancients...recognize.

I knew there was a reason that he has always been one of my favorite writers.

I don't know what any of your ages are. I am 51. I was born in 1950. We didn't have a TV until I was 7. When we did get a TV, I watched it alot. There were several programs on then (there was only ABC and CBS) that focused on World War II. One was The Big Picture, hosted by Walter Cronkite. Images of the atrocities committed by the Japanese and Germans are deeply imbedded in my mind.

Rebbic, your rethoric began in the early 1960's, with whinners, who were never in the military, never did a thing in their lives for this country. They sit on their asses and try to rewrite history, in total ignorance to any historical fact.

Let me give you some hard facts. Actual facts, not armchair bullshiat.

Japan occupied China from 1931, to 1945. During that time, the Tokyo War Crimes Tribunal and Chinese war historians estimate deaths resulting from the Japanese occupation at 10 to 30 MILLION. I hope you noted the figure I just typed in caps. These weren't military, these were civilians. The deaths were from massacre, attack, forced starvation, and germ warfare.

In December, 1937, Japanese soldiers captured the capital city of China, Nanking. The Japanese were given orders to kill all captives. This is now known as "The Rape of Nanking". Between 200,000 and 300,000 Chinese were murdered. Fifty thousand were machine gunned to death as they crossed a river trying to get away, in one day.

Today, revisionist in Japan deny it even happened, as the same type of people here in the States claim the Holocaust never happened.

When our B-29's finally got a foothold on airbases in the Pacific, we began to bring the war to Japan. Conventional bombs were having little effect. A tactics revision was made, under command of General Curtis Lemay, and incendiary bombs were dropped on Tokyo. The ensuing firestorm killed 150,000 in one night. LESS that the estimated 140,000 killed BY BOTH ATOMIC BOMBS.

The bombing, by Allies, of Dresden, Germany, killed 500,000 people, IN ONE NIGHT.

What you fail to understand (or refuse to, because it would nullify you "Pity the Japanese" attitude) is that we had amassed off of the coast of Japan, and invasion fleet of such magnitude, that OUR losses were estimated at over 1,000,000 (THAT'S ONE MILLION) American soldiers.

There are those in Japanese government, TODAY, that want us to APOLOGIZE for World War II, let alone Hiroshima and Nagasaki.

My only apology to that revisionism is that we only had two atomic weapons.

Our Nation is now at WAR. This will probably be known as World War III. It is a war that the meek cannot be allowed to influence, for that is the action of a coward. The whinning of armchair quarterbacks on FINALLY seeing the in-your-face vision of war, on the highway of death in the Gulf War, influenced and stopped our pursuit. It now appears that many of todays problems have grown from that timidity.

This isn't going to be a fish-in-the barrel shoot, like the Gulf War. That was quick. Convenient. Instant gratification. Actually, the Gulf War was a joke. It was armchair quarterback entertainment. Then, when the reality of close up war was shown, and not the two-mile high video of smart bombs looking like some detached video game, those entralled with it didn't like it any more.

Everything has changed now. You will learn the meaning of WAR. It's not a video game. It's not a TV program you can turn off.

It's here among us now.

Looks like I need to check my spelling closer on some of my posts. Actually, there is too much anger in me right now, to give a fark about being grammatically correct.

Batcar ...

We are at war. War is Hell. And the first casualty of war is the truth.

The difference between this war and WWII is that Japan and Germany had clear territorial goals in mind. When Japan attacked Pearl Harbor, their intent was to take out enough of the US Pacific Fleet in one attack to force the US into a position of negotiation that would lead to the US ceding power to Japan in the Pacific. Had the US carriers been in Pearl Harbor during that attack, that strategy may well have succeeded.

What motivated Tuesday's attack? As I said above, I think it was payback for US involvement in the killing of innocents in the Middle East. What did they hope to achieve? Near as I can tell, the attack itself was goal. What do they expect us to do in response? I am not sure. Maybe they were not aware that they would raise the anger of the world against them. Maybe they thought this would draw world attention to their cause. Maybe their concern was not the US reaction, but the reaction of their supporters. Maybe they didn't consider what the response would be.

However, as we count our dead, be sure that allies of those who carried out the attack will compare the total with the count of their own dead. If we are preparing to go to war, we should be aware that we are about to enter battle with people who were born into battle, who have seen more blood spilled than ten World Trade Centers, and who are rolling up their sleeves for business as usual.

right on, Batcar01

this country really scares me sometimes. so many have weak stomachs and loud mouths. the middle east laughs at us. they think we have no fight in us. they think we've grown fat, lazy. and up till now we've given them every reason to do so. the biggest army in the world - inactive - a showpiece. all are battles seem to be from 35000 feet. some of these comments i read here are from those who are incredibly sheltered in gen-x, who have the willpower of veal. even with an attack worse than pearl harbor they are still crying a group therapy approach to foreign policy. i'm in my mid twenties, i havent seen too much, but what i do know is there is a time to philosophize and there is a time to act. let us now find justice on land, sea, and air.

He just e-mailed me a thanks too. The man is classy

Dave Barry has the potential to write a meaningful column, as he showed us. But I'm still not forgiving him for writing about stuff that everyone else already covered when it comes to middle-aged baby boomers who think it's good that you can't work the computer. "What's the deal with these computers, huh? With their gigabytes, and their modems, I just can't figure it out!" says the aging comedian, as the balding men in the audience laugh in glee, careful not to mess up their combovers.

So, Barry: Not bad.
Tragedy: Very bad
Coping with it: Doing far from bad
Sub-par comedian: Sinbad

I think some people are missing the point when it came to nuking Japan. It was calculated that an invasion of Japan would cost one million American lives. Unlike France, which was to be liberated, Japan's own citizens were prepared to fight tooth-and-nail, toe-to-toe until invaders were driven back from their homeland. The end result would probably be a virtually annihilated Japanese population. So, instead, the nukes were dropped, and Emperor Hirohito, against the advice of his aides, made a radio broadcast to the Japanese people, telling them that Japan was quitting the war because it had ceased to be of profit to the Japanese. There was no talk of surrender. Several military officials were planning to assassinate Hirohito, but failed when he made the address before they can kill him. I suppose it goes to show that a figurehead is more than a figurehead until the people know it.
Think about it. If we had invaded Japan, how many of use wouldn't be here now?

Oh, and this should have a "cool" tag, not a "misc."

BatCar01, according to a friend of mine, one of his dad's friends who's a WWII vet wrote that. And damn, Dave Barry rules! I've read almost all his books and have 2 autographed.