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(MSNBC)   39 year old man steals painting of Virgin Mary from church to pay for underage girlfriend's abortion, First Class aisle seat to Hell   (msnbc.msn.com) divider line 86
    More: Dumbass  
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8298 clicks; posted to Main » on 23 Aug 2009 at 9:57 AM (5 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2009-08-23 05:39:47 AM
Now, if it was some operation for an underage BOY, it would be okay.
 
2009-08-23 09:58:41 AM
Hell: where there is pineapple in the cole slaw.
 
2009-08-23 09:58:45 AM
Immaculate abortion?
 
2009-08-23 10:01:00 AM
A Nebraska man who stole a painting of the Virgin Mary to finance an abortion for a teen he was accused of raping has been convicted of first-degree sexual assault and felony theft.

That's a strange combination of convictions. I wonder what other cases have come through the justice system?

1st degree murder and graffiti?
Assault on a peace officer and treason?
Jaywalking and rape?
 
2009-08-23 10:02:06 AM
Haha, he lost the battle and now has to pay child support.
 
2009-08-23 10:03:03 AM
I like it.
 
2009-08-23 10:04:03 AM
Well, if you're going to sin, sin well.
 
2009-08-23 10:04:14 AM
He should have just quoted Joseph: "Don't look at me, it's not mine."
 
2009-08-23 10:06:30 AM
Free abortions under Obamacare wold have prevented this art theft.
 
2009-08-23 10:06:43 AM
Wow, just wow
 
2009-08-23 10:07:10 AM
That chap's gonna get it in the pokey.
 
2009-08-23 10:07:10 AM
No hero tag?
 
2009-08-23 10:07:47 AM
I want to party with that guy!
 
2009-08-23 10:08:10 AM
I love it! Very creative thinking. Kudos to you, my friend
 
2009-08-23 10:08:19 AM
www.shortsshortsshorts.com
 
2009-08-23 10:08:24 AM
phlegmmo: He should have just quoted Joseph: "Don't look at me, it's not mine."

Oh, no... we don't want to accidentally start up any new religions, do we?
 
2009-08-23 10:09:06 AM
What's Mary care? She's been dead for what, like two millenia? Jebus, too. My bet is that they're not even aware of it.
 
2009-08-23 10:10:15 AM
I know him. He's a progressive democrat.
 
2009-08-23 10:12:09 AM
porcelain808: That chap's gonna get it in the pokey.

Is pokey prison slang for a moist body orifice?
 
2009-08-23 10:12:42 AM
he could have gotten away with this if he wasnt such a douche, he had the biatch in Mexico he should have cut her up put her some burritos and called it a day.

/ill have the seat next to Aurelio Vallerillo-Sanchez please
 
2009-08-23 10:13:18 AM
This guy is an idiot you dont go hats off with the underage girlfriend
 
2009-08-23 10:13:51 AM
Stealing paintings of his mom makes the baby Jesus cry.
 
2009-08-23 10:14:39 AM
This ALMOST qualifies as, dare I say, irony in the "Catholic relic used to pay for a procedure which Catholics ardently oppose" sense... yeah, I know... not quite.
 
2009-08-23 10:15:08 AM
tawelsh: porcelain808: That chap's gonna get it in the pokey.

Is pokey prison slang for a moist body orifice?


there is only one pokey

www.linkandpinhobbies.com

/that poor horse :P
 
2009-08-23 10:16:23 AM
polf pilf: Haha, he lost the battle and now has to pay child support.

He is unemployable at this point. You and me be paying for the crotchfruit.
 
2009-08-23 10:17:19 AM
WWDD?

/Damone
 
2009-08-23 10:18:28 AM
He didn't really need to do all that, but when working on a blasphemy collection, the tendency is to take it as far as you can.
 
2009-08-23 10:22:36 AM
3:2 odds the dude gets seated right next to the guy that shot the pope.
 
2009-08-23 10:27:47 AM
wow, least perfect crime evar
 
2009-08-23 10:29:27 AM
No "Hero" tag?
 
2009-08-23 10:30:22 AM
Fortunately for his victim, he apparently missed all the news stories where American abortion businesses didn't report statutory rape. No need to go to Mexico.
 
2009-08-23 10:33:04 AM
farbekrieg: tawelsh: porcelain808: That chap's gonna get it in the pokey.

Is pokey prison slang for a moist body orifice?

there is only one pokey



/that poor horse :P


True. True.
 
2009-08-23 10:33:55 AM
wow, just wow. he should win a prize or something.
 
2009-08-23 10:35:10 AM
All he needed to do was be a teacher and he'd have all the makings for epic criminal.
 
2009-08-23 10:35:54 AM
So now 'teen' means 'underage'?

I've, uh, got to delete a few things.
 
2009-08-23 10:47:18 AM
I was not aware that there was a big market for paintings of the Virgin Mary, outside of, you know, a church.

A nice statue of her, now, that's a different story.

www.splendoroftruth.com
 
2009-08-23 10:50:11 AM
The window seats are better.
 
2009-08-23 11:01:01 AM
J. Frank Parnell: So now 'teen' means 'underage'?

I've, uh, got to delete a few things.


No.... 14 means 'underage'
 
2009-08-23 11:03:04 AM
Kuoxasar: Jaywalking and rape?

This will be the name of my next album

/will send you a royalty
 
2009-08-23 11:06:23 AM
39 year old man steals painting of Virgin Mary from church to pay for underage girlfriend's abortion

Was that wrong?

sports.espn.go.com
 
2009-08-23 11:06:59 AM
Wile_E._Quixote: J. Frank Parnell: So now 'teen' means 'underage'?

I've, uh, got to delete a few things.

No.... 14 means 'underage'


Yeah, i just read the rest of TFA. When they put those big blocks of ads in between the paragraphs i sometimes become bewildered. I'm also on my first cup of coffee.
 
2009-08-23 11:14:51 AM
But...

All babies want to get borned!
 
2009-08-23 11:30:37 AM
Replica: But...

All babies want to get borned!


Not emo babies.
 
2009-08-23 11:33:42 AM
Bigglesworth III
Hell: where there is pineapple in the cole slaw.


I LOL'ed to the point of urinary incontinence.


/ya, really
 
2009-08-23 11:33:56 AM
Bevets?
 
2009-08-23 11:37:02 AM
Aurelio Vallerillo-Sanchez, 39, of Omaha pleaded no contest to the charges Friday and faces up to 70 years in prison when sentenced in October, Douglas County prosecutor Brenda Beadle said Saturday.

Hola, carnal?
 
2009-08-23 11:39:45 AM
J. Frank Parnell: So now 'teen' means 'underage'?

I've, uh, got to delete a few things.


If said teen is 14, then yes.

13- and 14-year-olds are teenagers. They are underage.
18- and 19-year-olds are teenagers. They are legal adults.

Is this really that difficult?
 
2009-08-23 11:50:59 AM
PredDawg8: Is this really that difficult?

In Soviet Canada, 14 is legal adult.

Really, though, read the rest of the thread. I didn't read the bottom of the article because i am a slack bastard.
 
2009-08-23 11:52:20 AM
tshetter: Free abortions under Obamacare wold have prevented this art theft.

Hooray for fetal death panels.
 
2009-08-23 11:56:28 AM
PredDawg8: J. Frank Parnell: So now 'teen' means 'underage'?

I've, uh, got to delete a few things.

If said teen is 14, then yes.

13- and 14-year-olds are teenagers. They are underage.
18- and 19-year-olds are teenagers. They are legal adults.

Is this really that difficult?


Sometimes, if you don't have lube.
 
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