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(Breitbart.com)   The Top 15 "conservative" films of the new millennium. On The Dark Knight: "Watching liberal critics gush over a not-so-thinly disguised thank you to President Bush was nearly as much fun as the movie"   (bighollywood.breitbart.com) divider line 210
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7950 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 20 Aug 2009 at 1:59 PM (5 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2009-08-20 08:42:09 AM  
[satire]?

If anything, The Dark Knight explores the darkness that comes when the lawmen are as lawless as the criminals.
 
2009-08-20 08:56:15 AM  
What a retarded article.

2. The Passion of the Christ (2004) - Easily, the purest and rawest emotional cinematic experience I've ever had. The Left's bigoted, venomous attacks combined with the film's eventual blockbuster success were almost as satisfying as the re-election of George W. Bush.

"I voted for Bush... Twice!"

3. The Dark Knight (2008) - Watching liberal critics gush over a not-so-thinly disguised thank you to President Bush and then harumph and find fault after conservatives calmly explained what this epic of action, character and allegory is really about, was nearly as much fun as the movie.

I don't even know what this means. Are they saying that Bush was Batman? Cause that is retarded.

7. 300 (2006) - God bless director Zack Snyder for not gutting and nuancing Frank Miller's brilliant take on the Battle of Thermopylae. Hopefully, someday, Hollywood will become a tolerant place where the conservative, pro-Western themes of "300″ won't have to be disguised in this way. Not that I mind. Visually, "300″ was not only richly rewarding, but proof that in the hands of a genius director CGI can enhance the story as opposed to distract.


Pro western themes? I can only assume they mean anti-Persian themes.

13. Shaun of the Dead (2004) - Funny, scary, imaginative and about as original as they come.

As awesome as this movie is, I am not sure I would call it "original". I can only assume they consider it a searing attack on the UK healthcare system.
 
2009-08-20 09:03:39 AM  
What, no Incredibles?
 
2009-08-20 09:05:16 AM  
...it took me this long to realize that "conservative" or anything like it appears nowhere but one or two of the film descriptions. This is a conservative's...top fifteen movies.
 
2009-08-20 09:12:38 AM  
AuntNotAnt: ...it took me this long to realize that "conservative" or anything like it appears nowhere but one or two of the film descriptions. This is a conservative's...top fifteen movies.

Well, it IS breitbart.com...so we can safely assume the article is crap.
 
2009-08-20 09:21:21 AM  
sarah silverman: "that movie 300? turns out how they got that title was they measured how gay it was on a scale of one to ten"
 
2009-08-20 09:29:58 AM  
Is the author really that wrong about Dark Knight? The cell phone - sonar set up seems to be a pretty solid reference to warrantless wiretapping.
 
2009-08-20 09:39:34 AM  
I Said: Is the author really that wrong about Dark Knight? The cell phone - sonar set up seems to be a pretty solid reference to warrantless wiretapping.

Yeah, but look how it was handled. Pretty much entirely opposite of Bush.

So yeah, they are pretty much wrong.

Also, I know I didn't watch Dark Knight looking for political meaning. Mostly because it was too awesome for me to bother.
 
2009-08-20 09:40:52 AM  
...These people think Stephen Colbert is on their side, don't they?
 
2009-08-20 10:05:25 AM  
Isn't Mulholland Drive just one huge masturbation fever dream?
 
2009-08-20 10:10:41 AM  
AuntNotAnt: ...it took me this long to realize that "conservative" or anything like it appears nowhere but one or two of the film descriptions. This is a conservative's...top fifteen movies.

That. There's nothing about this being a list of conservative movies.
 
2009-08-20 10:12:56 AM  
No YOU'RE a Towel:

I know I didn't watch Dark Knight looking for political meaning.

Conservatives are on a constant prowl to find things to validate what is essentially an empty and ignorant ideology. Their belief system is based on fears upon fears and one cannot make rational decisions in a state of terror. I'd pity them if their actions weren't so reliably deadly.
 
2009-08-20 10:14:12 AM  
FlashHarry: sarah silverman: "that movie 300? turns out how they got that title was they measured how gay it was on a scale of one to ten"

Ha!!! That's awesome.
 
2009-08-20 10:34:35 AM  
Talk about seeing what you want to see in a film.
Yes, it's another idiotic article from Breitbart.
 
2009-08-20 10:38:22 AM  
What's "conservative" about these movies?

I must be missing something.
 
2009-08-20 10:41:18 AM  
As a Republican, I don't choose my films to fit an ideology.

Perhaps this critic is missing the point that he no doubt would make about movies being "politically correct."

If you feel the need to call yourself a Conservative before your party affiliation, then maybe you shouldn't be in the party. You serve ideology over nation, and that is killing the party, and it's dividing the nation. Try putting the "republic" back into Republican, and then come and talk to me you partisan blind idiotic zealot...
 
2009-08-20 10:43:51 AM  
make me some tea: What's "conservative" about these movies?

I must be missing something.


The article never purported to be the Top 15 "conservative" movies, just the top 15 movies of the past decade.

Subby's reading comprehension fails, but this is Fark so that's unsurprising.

That said, I'm probably biased because I totally got a shout out in that article.
 
2009-08-20 10:44:11 AM  
not sure if serious
 
2009-08-20 10:44:38 AM  
This list is MADNESS!

This list is SPECTACULAR!!!!!!

300?

Pirates of the Caribbean? Pirates?
 
2009-08-20 10:55:35 AM  
hubiestubert: If you feel the need to call yourself a Conservative before your party affiliation

He seems to espouse nothing about philosophical conservatism. The problem with Republicans isn't their conservatism, it's their ignorant asshattery, mortgaged souls, and win-at-any-cost shenanigans.
 
2009-08-20 11:08:22 AM  
No YOU'RE a Towel: Pro western themes? I can only assume they mean anti-Persian themes.

300 was incredibly pro-Persian.

First, the Spartans came off as cold, ignorant assholes. Which isn't too far from the truth. These guys were born and raised to kill. Were they potters? Were they stonecutters? Were they farmers? NO, THEY WERE SOLDIERS!

The Spartans were run by corrupt pedophiles. Their leaders included rapists.

The Spartans killed the messenger. That's not just shiatty, that's brutal. The man comes offering not only peace, but prosperity, power, and inclusion. The answer was a brutal death.

Speaking of the Persians, they took in the deformed and outcast Spartan child without recoiling in horror at his condition. Xerxes showed him compassion. The Persians were a HIGHLY inclusive group, with women generals seen, with hundreds of ethnicities, and liberal attitudes towards sex and intoxicants.

Xerxes was incredibly hospitable and tried to avert hostilities at every turn. He wasn't the one who built a wall out of corpses.

And let's not forget that Herodotus told us, and got a lot of crap from Greeks for not being pro-Greek for saying, that the second Persian invasion was due to constant border disputes and fomented uprisings. Most of the Greek cities submitted eagerly and willingly, without military force. It was a few that were causing trouble for EVERYONE, including Sparta. The beligerence and breaking the peace was the Spartan's fault.

The Spartans were no heroes.

Miller is known for his irony. His irony is informed, especially in 300, by Homer, who was noted for elevating not the gods and the ancient Greek father-heroes like poets of his time, but for elevating mortals and their enemies. Not seeing his fatalism and irony in constructing 300 might lead you to think he's celebrating the Spartans and the conservative "superman" ideal. He's really glorifying the horror and dark humor of the entire situation.
 
2009-08-20 11:10:44 AM  
I turned off The Passion of the Christ right after the scene where Jesus invented the dining room table. That was retarded.
 
2009-08-20 11:14:58 AM  
palladiate: The Spartans killed the messenger. That's not just shiatty, that's brutal. The man comes offering not only peace, but prosperity, power, and inclusion. The answer was a brutal death.

He came offering those things if they'd swear allegiance to a god-king. Not so good of a deal if you ask me.
 
2009-08-20 11:15:16 AM  
hubiestubert: As a Republican

People still admit to that?
 
2009-08-20 11:16:58 AM  
 
2009-08-20 11:17:55 AM  
palladiate:

That's a pretty awesome interpretation.
 
2009-08-20 11:25:17 AM  
palladiate: Xerxes showed him compassion.

Xerxes showed him compassion because he could use him to crush his enemies.
 
2009-08-20 11:46:01 AM  
The Icelander: He came offering those things if they'd swear allegiance to a god-king. Not so good of a deal if you ask me.

EVERYONE in Sparta had to submit to Leonidas I. EVERYONE. The only thing that had to happen was for Leonidas to submit to Xerxes, and they'd have been left pretty much alone like the rest of the Persian empire. And most historians, even early Greek historians, have been pretty impressed by their level of organization, structure, scientific advancement, attitudes toward freedom, amazing commerce and trade, and powerful army.

Leonidas had a chance to gain massive riches and fame by leveraging Spartan military discipline and strategy in the empire. Xerxes offered them peace three times, and held off at Thermopylae for two days trying to talk Leonidas out of defending the pass. Leonidas chose being Greek over being Persian. His choice to make as king, and a really, really ballsy move against an army that Herodotus called 2.5 million and history has put at over 1/2 a million (for logistics reasons alone). He faced the largest military the world could possibly field in his day, there is no question.

Xerxes was not a blood-thirsty man. He razed the three towns that fought him. Less than 1/3 of the city-states opposed Persian control, even before Xerxes had assembled his enormous army.

Not saying Leonidas was wrong. Just saying there's more than one way to look at it. But saying the Spartans were "free" is laughable. Sparta was no Athens.

And for the fact that this review missed the hugely important factor that Miller's storytelling is heavily French New Wave in it's construction (Sin City, with it's oddly-recurring dead-but-locked-in-ambiguous-time characters is textbook Nouvelle Vague), and that Miller was not ignorant of history and still decided to add drastic stylistic changes tells me he knows nothing of art. Miller purposefully told the story with Greek Irony, with a definitely modern twist.

He even has the audience by the balls. You're supposed to cheer for the bloody Spartans. You're supposed to think their defiance was for freedom, not for following a dictator. You're supposed to celebrate their destruction like it was a victory (the movie somewhat dampened the effect with the narration). And you're supposed to be a vile and bad person for having doing so.

Miller exhausts many people with this kind of rampant irony. It's all over his works like some kind of Auteur Bukakke. Yes Miller, we know, we know. But, somehow, this dickbag didn't get that. Completely oblivious to any message Miller was oh-so-cleverly trying to send across, Mr Nolte here just thought it was about these freedom-loving, democracy-having, chest-heaving, nipple-glistening, ass-patting wonderboys going over there to that desert and killing some Iraqis. Or Iranians. Or whatever, those liberal brown people. In effect, he became the target of Miller's irony like a second man in a double-penetration video taking an unexpected load on the face.
 
2009-08-20 12:07:37 PM  
palladiate: First, the Spartans came off as cold, ignorant assholes. Which isn't too far from the truth. These guys were born and raised to kill. Were they potters? Were they stonecutters? Were they farmers? NO, THEY WERE SOLDIERS!

The Spartans were run by corrupt pedophiles. Their leaders included rapists.

The Spartans killed the messenger. That's not just shiatty, that's brutal. The man comes offering not only peace, but prosperity, power, and inclusion. The answer was a brutal death.


Don't forget the death panels that determined if a child was worthy of growing up.
 
2009-08-20 12:32:34 PM  
pizen: Don't forget the death panels that determined if a child was worthy of growing up.

You make an salaciously salient point.
 
2009-08-20 12:49:52 PM  
i didn't know chris elliott was a film reviewer now
 
2009-08-20 12:50:17 PM  
palladiate: Leonidas chose being Greek over being Persian.

I thought you were born liking greek sex or not. Its not a choice.
 
2009-08-20 12:53:51 PM  
I_C_Weener: I thought you were born liking greek sex or not. Its not a choice.

I don't know about that. If you asked me a few years ago, I wouldn't have thought I would like taking you from behind nearly as much as I do today.

You did a lot to convince me. I'm going with choice.
 
2009-08-20 01:22:30 PM  
palladiate: Not saying Leonidas was wrong. Just saying there's more than one way to look at it. But saying the Spartans were "free" is laughable. Sparta was no Athens.

Sparta was in the running for 'biggest bunch of assholes on the planet' at that time, really.

palladiate: Completely oblivious to any message Miller was oh-so-cleverly trying to send across, Mr Nolte here just thought it was about these freedom-loving, democracy-having, chest-heaving, nipple-glistening, ass-patting wonderboys going over there to that desert and killing some Iraqis. Or Iranians. Or whatever, those liberal brown people. In effect, he became the target of Miller's irony like a second man in a double-penetration video taking an unexpected load on the face.

It's similar to Starship Troopers. It's funny watching people try to describe it as just an action flick.
 
2009-08-20 01:30:56 PM  
palladiate: Not saying Leonidas was wrong. Just saying there's more than one way to look at it. But saying the Spartans were "free" is laughable. Sparta was no Athens.

I'm not saying Spartans were free. I'm saying Sparta was free. And even the Athenians weren't that liberated. They owned slaves and women couldn't vote.

Leonidas didn't want to be under the thumb of a god-king. Seems reasonable to me. Especially if he was king of his own particularly bloody hill.
 
2009-08-20 01:32:31 PM  
Obdicut: It's similar to Starship Troopers. It's funny watching people try to describe it as just an action flick.

I agree that it's an allegory. But it does make me want to kill some bugs.

\Also, there are boobies
\\Wonderful, wonderful boobies
 
2009-08-20 01:39:50 PM  
The Icelander: Leonidas didn't want to be under the thumb of a god-king. Seems reasonable to me. Especially if he was king of his own particularly bloody hill.

I'm not disagreeing with you. I'm disagreeing with our critic, who thinks the Spartans were rebuking the evil god-king and standing up for truth, justice, and the American way. It's the story of one petty tyrant with big balls standing up to and pissing in the eye of a petty tyrant with a big damn army.

There's nothing particularly conservative about it. Unless, of course, the "conservative...themes of "300″ that are "disguised" are of the manly, oily, well-endowed, and naked variety.
 
2009-08-20 01:41:36 PM  
palladiate: Unless, of course, the "conservative...themes of "300″ that are "disguised" are of the manly, oily, well-endowed, and naked variety.

IIRC, Leonidas did have a pretty wide stance.
 
2009-08-20 01:51:30 PM  
palladiate: I'm not disagreeing with you. I'm disagreeing with our critic, who thinks the Spartans were rebuking the evil god-king and standing up for truth, justice, and the American way. It's the story of one petty tyrant with big balls standing up to and pissing in the eye of a petty tyrant with a big damn army.

Okay, as long as I can still appreciate it primarily for the boobies and the fight scenes.
 
2009-08-20 02:04:35 PM  
If they're trying to make me feel sorry for them, it won't work.
 
2009-08-20 02:08:34 PM  
Concerning The Dark Knight:

1. Torture was ineffective and the "wiretap" program was dismantled. Not to mention the anti-death penalty theme.

2. That being said, if you get your politics from a film about a man dressing up as a bat to fight criminals with karate, you fail as a human being.
 
2009-08-20 02:10:36 PM  
2. The Passion of the Christ (2004) - Easily, the purest and rawest emotional cinematic experience I've ever had. The Left's bigoted, venomous attacks combined with the film's eventual blockbuster success were almost as satisfying as the re-election of George W. Bush.

Uh... sorry, but weren't those attacks justified? People called Mel Gibson an anti-Semite, the right denied it, then Gibson went on a tirade about the evil of the Jews.
 
kth
2009-08-20 02:15:15 PM  
No YOU'RE a Towel:
Also, I know I didn't watch Dark Knight looking for political meaning. Mostly because it was too awesome for me to bother.


THIS. Now I must watch TDK while working this afternoon.
 
2009-08-20 02:16:51 PM  
i457.photobucket.com

Awesome
 
2009-08-20 02:17:27 PM  
What the fark is up with Batman's voice in that movie?
 
2009-08-20 02:17:58 PM  
Except that he only used it to subdue a specific person, rather than storing data from large swathes of people to find random bad guys. And he destroyed it afterward.

But, whatever.
 
2009-08-20 02:20:17 PM  
I've always interpreted Superman and Batman along Liberal and Conservative lines.

Superman is a liberal ideal, and Batman the conservative. Hear me out:

Batman is a one-man secretive vigilante, who is privately funded, fights with the "underbelly criminal element" of society, causes much hooplah over "is he a good guy or is he a bad guy" works with an uncorruptable police lieutenant/commissioner in a city of corrupt officials, and tries to make "Gotham a safer place." He lives incognito as a rich playboy that makes a hobby of buying things.

Superman is a one man public superhero, who fights for what's right, fights hostile strange aliens and corporate supervillains intent on increasing their control of the city/world, fights with pure and incorruptible government agencies against those interests that would harm the common man. He lives incognito as "the common man" reporter so that he can be on a more vigilant alert of threats.

Batman runs afowl (no pun intended) of the police when his methods are too violent.

Superman runs afowl of public opinion when he loses his temper.

Not a perfect fit I admit, but the basics seem to make each character lean one way or another.
 
2009-08-20 02:20:35 PM  
I've seen every one of those movies except for Up, not yet out on DVD. I've even seen all the runners-up. Nice list, and the guy obviously has good taste -- he chose movies I have seen and, with the exception of Mulholland Drive, liked.

I would characterize this as a "Conservative" list only because, with the exception of three British movies (including the runners-up), all are true-blue American. Either this critic hates subtitles, or he simply doesn't count foreign-made films as worthy of any consideration. So he has never seen the likes of

The Edge of Heaven
Spirited Away
Twilight Samurai
The Last Sword is Drawn
The Hidden Blade
Downfall
The Band's Visit
Waltz With Bashir
Persepolis
1612
The Cuckoo

and many, many others.
 
2009-08-20 02:21:57 PM  
WFern: Concerning The Dark Knight:

1. Torture was ineffective and the "wiretap" program was dismantled. Not to mention the anti-death penalty theme.

2. That being said, if you get your politics from a film about a man dressing up as a bat to fight criminals with karate, you fail as a human being.


The whole reason behind batman having to create the phone sonar was because HE created a monster. the batman was responsible for this mess. The dialogue with Alfred confirms this, batman pushed them to their limits. The war on terror has never been about acknowledging the failures of US foreign policy and trying to rectify them...
 
2009-08-20 02:22:55 PM  
imashark: Superman is a one man public superhero, who fights for what's right, fights hostile strange aliens and corporate supervillains intent on increasing their control of the city/world, fights with pure and incorruptible government agencies against those interests that would harm the common man. He lives incognito as "the common man" reporter so that he can be on a more vigilant alert of threats.

Also, everyone knows the media is liberal.
 
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