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(Boston Globe)   Woman keeps dead husband's body in house for three weeks just in case religious cult was right about him coming back to life   (boston.com) divider line 134
    More: Unlikely  
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6531 clicks; posted to Main » on 04 Mar 2003 at 2:19 AM (12 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2003-03-03 09:39:04 PM  
Now that is just sick. =/
 
2003-03-03 09:57:10 PM  
Haven't we read about this woman at least once a week for at least the past month?
 
2003-03-03 10:49:23 PM  
Hey, nothing completely psycho nutball about keeping your rotting spouse in the house with you while you pray that his festering, wormy corpse will rise again.
Right?
 
2003-03-03 10:57:07 PM  
I wouldn't be caught dead with a necrophiliac.
 
2003-03-03 11:04:54 PM  
Hey, she was just making sure. Cut her some slack.
 
2003-03-04 12:04:31 AM  
Before the Bronze Age (I think) in the mediterranean, people would bury their dead inside their houses, and then stick a rock on top of their bodies to make sure they would not come back to haunt them.
 
2003-03-04 01:25:56 AM  
The above post has been brought to you by the Useless Information Department.
 
2003-03-04 02:21:21 AM  
"Here lies my wife, as cold as ever."

"Here lies my husband, stiff at last."
 
2003-03-04 02:22:00 AM  
god dam, that must of stunk, after 12 hours if i have to move one it makes me puke, Three weeks? god, he started to decompose.... ewwwwwww
 
2003-03-04 02:27:20 AM  
What? And she didn't even take a nibble? Like I could beleive that.
 
2003-03-04 02:29:02 AM  
(eye b4 e xept after yadda yadda. Hey! When do we get a Fark spellcheck!?)
 
2003-03-04 02:29:59 AM  
hey, has anyone ever been to that one site called fark.com? i heard it was pretty cool sometimes.......
 
2003-03-04 02:31:33 AM  
Spin359.......

After 12 hours rigor has set in nicely im sure....but decomposition does not get underway very well until 48 hours after death when the bactieria in the digestive tract begin to dissolve the soft tissues of the body. The actin filaments in the muscle cells deplete their energy and release after about 24 hours....which makes rigor seem to go away.

cocktail knowlege: Your muscles expend energy when the filamets RELEASE....not when they contract like most ppl believe. when you die, the actin filaments (whose activation site is closed due to a complicated reaction involving sodium ions and calcium) begin to degrade, which leaves the active site exposed, causing the muscles to "lock" causing rigor mortis. Since the person is dead, the muscles have no energy to undo this reaction and the muscles stay locked in place until the fibers themselves begin to degrade.

WOW! Amazing things you learn in med school.
 
2003-03-04 02:33:34 AM  
Spin359 how often to you move dead bodies?
 
2003-03-04 02:38:08 AM  
LA270Hunter: I was refering to three weeks dead. thats bad. 12 hours isnt too bad.

JoeShow: I work in a hospital as a security officer, i'm the guy that comes and takes you to the morgue after you die, we gotta unzip the bag and make sure there are no valuables, that makes for a horrid smell sometimes.
 
2003-03-04 02:38:44 AM  
i bet their relationship was pretty lifeless...
 
2003-03-04 02:40:01 AM  
So what they are trying to tell me here is i shouldn't have shaved my head,joined a cult, gave all my money to the cult, and killed for the cult, because its not going to make me a zombie? Damn it i want my money back whats the good use of a cult if they cant make you a zombie?
 
2003-03-04 02:48:57 AM  
Better safe than sorry?
 
2003-03-04 02:49:02 AM  
irockalot :

let the jokes roll
 
2003-03-04 02:49:52 AM  
?????
irockalot : (rimshot)
there
 
43%
2003-03-04 02:50:09 AM  
ya know...if i were her i'd go ahead and fVck him, then make him a ham sandwich.

Don't want to piss off the dead, you know
 
2003-03-04 02:50:17 AM  
Reminds me of the saying, "Guests are like fish (and dead relatives). They start to stink after 3 days."
 
2003-03-04 02:51:38 AM  
Wonder what the cult folks said when she called them after the cops came...
"Oooh, today was gonna be the day. They didn't take him to the morgue did they? They did? Oooh, yeah, the cops blew it. It was just getting ready to happen."
 
2003-03-04 02:52:24 AM  
Well, look at the bright side, he had a hardon for 2 weeks straight......prolly the best days of that lady's life.

I just hope she put him by the window where he would stay warm longer.......
 
2003-03-04 02:53:25 AM  
Maybe she just didn't notice.
 
2003-03-04 02:54:43 AM  
There seems to be a lot of dead kittens in my apartment....
 
2003-03-04 02:55:05 AM  
Last summer I had to pick up a dead squirrel out of my backyard. Man, all day in the sun in 105 degree heat really ripened that sucker up. It wasn't so bad once I got him in the house under the air conditioning.
 
2003-03-04 02:58:04 AM  
sorry, i was gone...
 
2003-03-04 02:58:39 AM  
But what if she's dead on?
 
2003-03-04 03:01:51 AM  
make no bones about it, she could be right. Of corpse if she's wrong she might as well be dead.
 
2003-03-04 03:03:57 AM  
she should sell his carcass' he won't be driving anywhere.
 
2003-03-04 03:06:07 AM  
she could have buried him, and yet he remains.
 
2003-03-04 03:06:53 AM  
geez, who killed this crowd?
 
2003-03-04 03:11:45 AM  
seriously people, what's with this rigor mortis?? I mean, come on, what's with it? I just don't get it!
 
2003-03-04 03:11:54 AM  
Irockalot


Good effort. The selling the carcass one made me laugh, but not the others.
 
2003-03-04 03:16:00 AM  
You know who Irockalot reminds me of? The Crypt Keeper. Whatever happened to that old stiff? Did he die or someth- err, nevermind.
 
2003-03-04 03:17:34 AM  
What a bunch of stiffs!
 
2003-03-04 03:18:05 AM  
maybe she decided to bury the hatchet and cut her losses...too bad her husband got a swolled head about it :)


/my lame attempt at post-mortem humor
 
2003-03-04 03:19:52 AM  
usually these jokes knock 'em dead, maybe it's just not a lively crowd tonight.
 
2003-03-04 03:21:02 AM  
incense and decomposing flesh
 
2003-03-04 03:21:09 AM  
What crawled up his ass and died?
 
2003-03-04 03:21:51 AM  
maybe my jokes just aren't passing over well.
 
2003-03-04 03:21:57 AM  
your husband is dead
he will not come back to you
and now your house stinks
 
2003-03-04 03:24:51 AM  
He was sick, but now his coffin has been contained.
 
2003-03-04 03:27:33 AM  
incense does not help
the stench of death covers all
next time use gladlock
 
2003-03-04 03:29:23 AM  
and also you could say he's...a....dead bloated...uh............body.
 
2003-03-04 03:32:13 AM  
In fact you could say he died and has been kept illegally for 3 weeks for hopes of resurrection! No...wait, forget that last one.
 
2003-03-04 03:34:19 AM  
Irockalot

Man, you're dying out there ...

*clears throat*

Sorry.
 
2003-03-04 03:34:30 AM  
Rigid all over.
What use is your husband now?
Necrophilia.
 
2003-03-04 03:36:10 AM  
::joins in with the bad jokes::

At least he didn't compain about it much.


(dear gawd, I feel so dirty now)
 
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