I'm so glad I didn't see the tag before I read the headline. The end of that paragraph-long topic was better that way.

No midgets?

Disappointed this wasn't about those two developers who died in that plane crash with the helicopter

How odd. This story hit the RSS feed but is not showing up on the main page.

The enlightened comments to the article were even better. Something about Republicans and their money. I don't seem to recall the article mentioning their political affiliations.

/Visiting Florida next week for my bday
//Wondering if I'll be in the news
///Slashies!!!

Can someone explain why we are allowing these hethans around there?

FTA:
This needle-shaped suburb on the outskirts of New York City has had just a handful of homicides since becoming a village in 1982.

/WTH my head just asploded. That needs some explaining.

I thought the Catholic Church abolished Limbo, didn't they?

I suppose other churches still don't care much about people bending over backwards, never heard they had rules against

//wanted for questioning

The Amway convention being the most disturbed of all the activities.

... the other South Jersey.

DONK-DONK.

This is why I wish we could teach voodoo in schools because we only hear of voodoo in a negative light.

Read the full story at the Miami Herald. (pops like his skull)

Many more Hiassenish details.

eas81: Can someone explain why we are allowing these hethans around there?

FTA:
This needle-shaped suburb on the outskirts of New York City has had just a handful of homicides since becoming a village in 1982.

/WTH my head just asploded. That needs some explaining.

Rye Brook incorporated as a village on July 7, 1982 (pops like your skull)

The Aristocrats

The "comic of the day" at the bottom of the article really tied everything together.

Link (new window)

Wtf is with all the Scientology propaganda in the fark adds today? Investigative report my ass.

Edziak: Wtf is with all the Scientology propaganda in the fark adds today? Investigative report my ass.

it must be voodooo

Edziak: Wtf is with all the Scientology propaganda in the fark adds today? Investigative report my ass.

Like Scientology plus five?

Actually, it sounds like the Jackson Family reunion.

coco ebert: RobertBruce: That'll be an interesting movie someday.

Or a Carl Hiaasen novel.

I was going to go with Coen Brothers sequel to Fargo, but a Hiaasen novel would be better.

An AMWAY CONVENTION.. LMFAO.. Amway the secret sex cult..

...Threadjacks work better when the article is boring.

TFA: (yeah I added some) Kinky sex and voodoo mark murder of Florida businessman
[You had me at my profile]

By Julie Brown
[downtown julie brown?]Miami Herald
RYE BROOK, N.Y. - This needle-shaped suburb on the outskirts of New York City has had just a handful of homicides since becoming a village in 1982.
[this will never be on a Fark teeshirt]

But now they have a doozy -- a steamy saga of wealth, privilege, kinky sex games, marital disharmony, family dysfunction and voodoo, shipped straight from the Sunshine State.
[or, as we here in america llike to call it, the suburbs]
Not to mention the latest plot twist: The murdered man was having an extramarital affair, multiple law enforcement sources confirm, although no one can say if it had any bearing on his fate.
[dur derp a hurrr durr derrp]

The victim is Ben Novack Jr., son of the founder of Miami Beach's famed Fontainebleau Hotel and a successful Fort Lauderdale businessman in his own right.
[rich people piss of a lot of other people, some plan their demise as a liftime hobby. Not news]

He was found duct-taped and bludgeoned on the morning of July 12 in Suite 452 of the Hilton Rye Brook, where he was overseeing an Amway convention. His wife discovered the body.
[Amway? And this is somehow a crime?!?!?!]

As police try to unravel who did what and why, Novack's widow and her daughter have feuded over control of the estate, thought to be worth as much as $10 million, and allegedly engaged in a crowbar-swinging brawl that brought out the Fort Lauderdale police.
[Obviously to keep suspision of the brutal murder away from them selves]

It's enough to make a victim spin in his grave, except Novack has yet to be interred. With his money tied up in litigation, Novack's corpse lies unclaimed at the morgue more than a month after his murder.
[something's rotten in denmark, or whereever]

"This is a complicated case,'' said Rye Brook Police Chief Gregory Austin, leader of 28 sworn officers.
[I'd be swearing, too. if I had to work OT to figue out who killed an amway asshole]

Austin, who refuses to discuss details of the investigation, has launched a Web site, www.bennovackjr.com, hoping it will attract tips.
[but no details, you give us details. Your details. Show them to us]

Read the full story at MiamiHerald.com
[or wait for the edited for TV version on CSI Miami/CSI NY on sweeps week]

wrapped in a farking bow

Because it will be one week befoer Christmas when it "premiers" and everyone will be "tuned into" it.
It's "must See TV"
if you are going to be impartial and on a jusry in the near future.
How about rounding up a few articles of clothing and looking for blood apatter, dipshiats
?
and rounding up not the family members aside, but anyone who contacted teh family members/
or would that be harder than writing html to gather forensic evidence.?

Huh, last night's Fark party ended up in New York? I definitely left at the wrong time.

dahmers love zombie: We call that "Sunday" round here.

/orlando

I came here to say that.
/Oveido...

Witchydiva: I don't know, Subby. Louisiana and New York would have been acceptable guesses as well.

First thing I thought of was Minnesota.

Amway thread?

I suddenly find myself thinking what politicians would be likely Amway distributors.

So far...

1) Sarah Palin
2) John Edwards
3) H. Ross Perot

coco ebert: RobertBruce: That'll be an interesting movie someday.

Or a Carl Hiaasen novel.


Came to say this.

Beat me to it.

The Aristocrats !!!!

/oblig

And then it gets wierd.

That's exactly how my grandfather went out.

/miss you Grandpa

swamp_of_dumb: Read the full story at the Miami Herald. (pops like his skull)

Many more Hiassenish details.

According to a police report, two days after the incident, Narcy admitted to planning the caper and to tying up her husband. But she insisted he participate willingly -- as part of a sex game in which they each tied each other up.

Damn. I thought my relationships were farked up.

Murdah Krue!
I gots um!
Looky!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z5LW07FTJbI&feature=related
Killahs awl.

Must be the Rob Zombie remake of "Weekend at Bernie's."