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(Guardian)   "I realise now that my cheating on Choose Your Own Adventure books was the precursor to my shameful, much struggled with tendency these days to take a quick peek at the end of a book if I can't bear the suspense any longer"   (guardian.co.uk ) divider line
    More: Obvious  
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5349 clicks; posted to Main » on 12 Aug 2009 at 11:31 AM (7 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



126 Comments     (+0 »)
 


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2009-08-12 10:43:50 AM  
The thing I remember most about those books was learning to contort my fingers as placeholders for several possible endings. Probably looked like a gang sign.
 
2009-08-12 11:09:16 AM  
If you want Johnny to walk into the dark, mysterious Cave of Doom, turn to page 23.

If you want Johnny to say "fark it", go home for a beer and watch the game, turn to page 7.
 
2009-08-12 11:13:12 AM  
I've always thought choose your own adventure for adults could revolutionize the trashy novel industry. The books could then appeal to men and women.

If you want chet to become a stable boy turn to page 23, if you want to chet to become a spy turn to page 93.
 
2009-08-12 11:13:16 AM  
Kinda like reading comments on fark before reading the article.
Now I'm off the read the article.
 
2009-08-12 11:33:57 AM  

gopher321: If you want Johnny to walk into the dark, mysterious Cave of Doom, turn to page 23.

If you want Johnny to say "fark it", go home for a beer and watch the game, turn to page 7.


*turns to page 23*
Johnny walks into the cave. He gets cake and a blow job.

*turns to page 7*
Johnny is raped. Again.
 
2009-08-12 11:34:19 AM  
I have fond memories of that one Goosebumps CYOA about the mall at night.
 
2009-08-12 11:35:15 AM  
I always read those books with all of my fingers stuck in the pages as placeholders. Make a bad choice...F that, I'm going back three choices.
 
2009-08-12 11:35:21 AM  
If you want Johnny to get into the car, turn to page 23.

*turns to page 23*

Johnny has died.
 
2009-08-12 11:35:50 AM  
I once had one that, due to some printing error, had blank pages throughout about 1/4 of the book. So you'd choose to punch the shark, turn to page 47 and find it to be blank. So we ended up turning to a random page and going from there. It made the plot very confusing.
 
2009-08-12 11:36:33 AM  
I always liked these stories. Time was, when Hypertext was a new idea and you built documents in Hypercard, they thought "hyperfiction", an interactive computer-based written book form, was going to revolutionize literature. Didn't happen.

Maybe it was because really good writers didn't try it, or that it didn't get the right marketing push... or the technology was immature and you needed a hefty PC to read it...

...or maybe the base concept is flawed. Maybe we really WANT a locked-down linear narrative, not some kind of collaborative effort with the author.
 
2009-08-12 11:37:09 AM  
images.somethingawful.com
 
2009-08-12 11:37:34 AM  

gopher321: If you want Johnny to walk into the dark, mysterious Cave of Doom, turn to page 23.

If you want Johnny to say "fark it", go home for a beer and watch the game, turn to page 7.


*Flips to page 7*

The beer was poisoned by the crafty cave monster who knows how to use reverse-lookup.

Also, your team lost the game while you were gasping on the floor.

/Those books were exercises in frustration. Give a kid no information, then punish the kid for choosing the safest option.
//Good preparation for the corporate world.
 
2009-08-12 11:41:17 AM  
My favorite

www.greg.pergaria.com
 
2009-08-12 11:42:32 AM  

Jonathan Hohensee: gopher321: If you want Johnny to walk into the dark, mysterious Cave of Doom, turn to page 23.

If you want Johnny to say "fark it", go home for a beer and watch the game, turn to page 7.

*turns to page 23*
Johnny walks into the cave. He gets cake and a blow job.

*turns to page 7*
Johnny is raped. Again.


*turns to page 24*
The cake is a lie.
 
2009-08-12 11:42:54 AM  

Whiskey Dickens: /Those books were exercises in frustration. Give a kid no information, then punish the kid for choosing the safest option.
//Good preparation for the corporate world.


It may have also helped along some Darwin Award winners, because choosing the most risky, stupid, counter-intuitive thing you could do usually got you the good ending.
 
2009-08-12 11:43:01 AM  
I'd like to see a Choose Your Own Adventure system at the bottom of Fark threads. I can choose to sneak through a troll-den in the Politics tab, or cross the vast barren wastes in a video thread.
 
2009-08-12 11:43:08 AM  
I chose not to make any choices. I'd spend hours standing in front of the entrance to the cave or on the flight deck of the spaceship, steadfastly refusing to do anything. Good times, good times.
 
2009-08-12 11:43:48 AM  
Peeking to the end of these posts

HA HA!

Done in 38.
 
2009-08-12 11:44:30 AM  
It's not Johnny whose fate lies in the balance; it's YOU, the reader; it was always choose YOUR own adventure. That upped the stakes. You must choose wisely--
 
2009-08-12 11:44:36 AM  

Uzzah: I chose not to make any choices. I'd spend hours standing in front of the entrance to the cave or on the flight deck of the spaceship, steadfastly refusing to do anything. Good times, good times.


Let me guess your in middle management now.
 
2009-08-12 11:45:33 AM  

Any Pie Left: I always liked these stories. Time was, when Hypertext was a new idea and you built documents in Hypercard, they thought "hyperfiction", an interactive computer-based written book form, was going to revolutionize literature. Didn't happen.


www.gamebooks.org

/HyperLinked
 
2009-08-12 11:45:37 AM  
I choose my own adventure every day I walk out of the house
 
2009-08-12 11:46:32 AM  
I had a series of Mario Brothers CYOABs. Instead of "you died" or "the end" it was always "Game over". And they were pretty cute, Princess Toadstool got a hell of a background.
 
2009-08-12 11:46:43 AM  
There was also Which Way books, which for the most part were inferior to Choose Your Own Adventure but there was one about having to stay in your uncle's haunted mansion overnight to claim your inheritence that frightened the holy fark out of me as a kid. And I read that story thread over and over again, it was one the finest works of horror fiction I have ever read. I wish I hadn't sold all of them at a garage sale.
 
2009-08-12 11:46:47 AM  
I recall one CYOA that included a page that was completely "unlinked" with the rest of the book (i.e., there was no way to legitimately land on that page). It featured, if I recall correctly, "the god of CYOA books" who banished you to hell for cheating, since you shouldn't have been looking at that page.
 
2009-08-12 11:47:16 AM  
I really thought I was the only kid who saved their spot to flip back to.
 
2009-08-12 11:47:21 AM  
"Choose Your Own Adventure" PAH!

"Fighting Fantasy" books was were it was at. Nothing like creepy ink sketches the living dead to scare the hell out a 10 year old.

/Yes, I do have "The Warlock of Firetop Mountain", why?
 
2009-08-12 11:48:23 AM  

Cheron: Let me guess your in middle management now.


you're does not equal your.
idiot
 
2009-08-12 11:48:28 AM  
I had to look for it, and it's out there: Online choose-your-own-adventure stories (EditThis.info).

Note: Some are NSFW!
 
2009-08-12 11:48:34 AM  

Tom_Slick: I've always thought choose your own adventure for adults could revolutionize the trashy novel industry. The books could then appeal to men and women.

If you want chet to become a stable boy turn to page 23, if you want to chet to become a spy turn to page 93.


Why not make it a movie instead of a book?

Of course, then you run into:
Computer: You chose, watch calculon recheck his paperwork.
Fry: no I didn't!
Computer: I am almost positive you did.
 
2009-08-12 11:48:53 AM  
Ah, this was the one that always got me. There was some sort of pathway maze hell that would keep me occupied for hours. I think this was the first one I had to cheat at to win, thus validating the somewhat annoying article.

img26.imageshack.us


I still don't look at the last pages of a book to check the ending, although if it is really dull (and it has to be mind numbingly dull) I'll skip a few pages here and there.
 
2009-08-12 11:50:00 AM  
Heh, remember the one where, at the end, you threw out a piece of trash, and it was a 50/50? You chose which page to turn to, 50 or 52.

Turn to 52? Trash goes in.

50? miss, you go to pick it up, and A RIFT IN SPACETIME OPENS AND RIPS YOU IN HALF AND YOU DIE.

/nightmares
//I actually think that was 'hyperspace' - it had ships you flew around and stuff
 
2009-08-12 11:50:02 AM  
http://www.cyoa.com/public/index.html

Cool.. I think I'll order some for my kids.
 
2009-08-12 11:50:12 AM  
www.gamebooks.org


AHA! I found it! Like I said some of the best work of horror fiction I have ever read.
 
2009-08-12 11:51:22 AM  
What were those D&D type choose your own adventures called? Fighting Fantasy? With the dice and the character sheets & stuff?

Those were way better. All the fun of role-playing games and you didn't even need any friends.

I never held my fingers in the pages myself - was easier to make a tree diagram on a sheet of paper. They didn't work if the book had sequences where you could go backwards though, like in a maze.
 
2009-08-12 11:51:37 AM  

Prank Call of Cthulhu: I recall one CYOA that included a page that was completely "unlinked" with the rest of the book (i.e., there was no way to legitimately land on that page). It featured, if I recall correctly, "the god of CYOA books" who banished you to hell for cheating, since you shouldn't have been looking at that page.


That was the Zork one - it also had a page where it would ask you if you wanted to use your Boots of Flying (if you found them earlier), and if you did, Bam. Cheaterdead.
 
2009-08-12 11:51:55 AM  
I've gotten in the bad habit of reading the plot summary on wikipedia for any movie I'm remotely interested in seeing. anyway, thought I'd share that with y'all.

/tips hat and wanders off
 
2009-08-12 11:52:29 AM  

Joe Hallenbeck: I once had one that, due to some printing error, had blank pages throughout about 1/4 of the book. So you'd choose to punch the shark, turn to page 47 and find it to be blank. So we ended up turning to a random page and going from there. It made the plot very confusing.


Isn't that where you're supposed to write in your own story?
 
2009-08-12 11:53:24 AM  
man, i couldn't have gotten through elementary school without these. many a lesson were completely lost on me while i stealthily read choose your own adventure.

anyone read the steve jackson ones? fighting fantasy i believe they were called. you had to roll dice for combat at certain sections. kinda like D&D lite.

i've got an eight year old boy now and he's discovered how cool these are. his friends at school are starting to borrow them so i wouldn't be surprised if these make a comeback.
 
2009-08-12 11:53:27 AM  

Kareeshus: What were those D&D type choose your own adventures called? Fighting Fantasy? With the dice and the character sheets & stuff?

Those were way better. All the fun of role-playing games and you didn't even need any friends.

I never held my fingers in the pages myself - was easier to make a tree diagram on a sheet of paper. They didn't work if the book had sequences where you could go backwards though, like in a maze.


Yeah. the spaceship captain one was the most 'gamey' and the Deathtrrap Dungeon ones were HARD AS BALLS (assuming you have hard balls), but satisfying (again, hard balls).

/owns every one, FF were the best
 
2009-08-12 11:55:19 AM  

My Baloney Has No First Name: Joe Hallenbeck: I once had one that, due to some printing error, had blank pages throughout about 1/4 of the book. So you'd choose to punch the shark, turn to page 47 and find it to be blank. So we ended up turning to a random page and going from there. It made the plot very confusing.

Isn't that where you're supposed to write in your own story?


I think we ended up writing "PORTAL!" in every blank page and just assumed you fell into a portal of randomness.
 
2009-08-12 11:58:21 AM  
When I was 8 and I burned through all my CYOA books, I picked up the King James Illustrated Bible. Let me tell you, as an 8 year old with no religious context put on it, that thing was CRAZY. About a thousand pages of AWESOME.
 
2009-08-12 12:00:30 PM  
I skipped ahead to the last post in this thread.
 
2009-08-12 12:01:44 PM  

Prank Call of Cthulhu: I recall one CYOA that included a page that was completely "unlinked" with the rest of the book (i.e., there was no way to legitimately land on that page). It featured, if I recall correctly, "the god of CYOA books" who banished you to hell for cheating, since you shouldn't have been looking at that page.


There was one called "Inside UFO 54-40" where you had to cheat to get to the "good" ending.
 
2009-08-12 12:05:46 PM  

hedztalez: When I was 8 and I burned through all my CYOA books, I picked up the King James Illustrated Bible.


The bible would be way more interesting as a CYOA.

If you want the Beast to issue forth a great river from his mouth, turn to page 823. If you want the Beast to chill the fark out and quit unleashing plagues, turn to page 419.
 
2009-08-12 12:05:50 PM  
i1007.photobucket.com


cause obviously teaching kids that a large percentage of bad decisions lead to death....something something.
 
2009-08-12 12:06:10 PM  
I liked to read Choose Your Own Adventures straight through like a normal book.
 
2009-08-12 12:06:24 PM  
webpages.charter.net
 
2009-08-12 12:07:12 PM  

hedztalez: cause obviously teaching kids that a large percentage of bad decisions lead to death....something something.


Teaches you not to mess around when Rasputin is in the building, that's for sure.
 
2009-08-12 12:07:33 PM  

Uzzah: I chose not to make any choices.


If you choose not to decide, you still have made a choice.
 
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