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(Boston Globe)   It ain't a real wedding reception without mace, knives and angry drunks   ( divider line
    More: Amusing  
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10647 clicks; posted to Main » on 03 Mar 2003 at 1:15 AM (14 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

50 Comments     (+0 »)
2003-03-02 08:40:08 PM  
Why was marijuana illegal again?
2003-03-02 09:06:03 PM  
Got me on that one, Meshman. If not for the surnames, that would sound like some of my family's weddings -- and funerals, for that matter. Irish Catholics . . . we put the "fun" in "funeral."
2003-03-02 09:55:24 PM  
Stunning, simply stunning.
2003-03-02 11:01:05 PM  
Awww, how lame. At my cousin's wedding a few years ago both fathers wound up in the hospital with sprained backs from being thrown over a table that broke (one for each) while trying to break up a fight, four people went to jail including the two women who were out on passes to attend the wedding and started the fight, the singer with the band got a cuncussion and stitches from a broken beer bottle to the head, all the horses from the ranch next to the reception hall had to be rounded back up from jumping the fence onto the highway, and it took nine sherrif's cars with two deputies each to clear all the combatants. And the reception hall was so damaged that it had to be repaired before the next election (it doubled as a polling place).

All in all, we figured it was a pretty good time; no one died.
2003-03-03 01:21:02 AM  
2003-03-03 01:21:28 AM  
France Surrenders
2003-03-03 01:21:51 AM  
i used to work in a golf course restaurant, and we had 2 weddings every weekend, and i've had my fair share of unruly patrons, but this is messed up. too bad the underage person was refused more alcohol. he should be happy he got any.
2003-03-03 01:28:37 AM  
At first, I thought the headline said "angry ducks". Does sound a bit looney tunes.
2003-03-03 01:33:38 AM  
aww.. no female fights? That would have been nice to watch ;)
2003-03-03 01:39:15 AM  
Long Island is the armpit of the Northeast. It's worse than Jersey.
2003-03-03 01:44:00 AM  

I wish she were at the wedding. That'd be sweet.
2003-03-03 01:44:17 AM  
The incident began just after midnight at St. Ladislaw Church when guest Cesar Flamenco, 19, was told he could not drink any more and began cursing, smashing bottles and fighting with other guests and guards

So they're just handing out drinks to 19-year-olds? In a church no less.
2003-03-03 01:48:42 AM  
I WAS gonna go into one I saw, which started out as the groom and his dad and friends drunken brawling-long story short(cause I'm not going into it now!) it erupted into a bonfire out front, but you'd still win as seeing the most disfunctional wedding ever! Congrats!
2003-03-03 01:51:28 AM  
Why didn't anyone invite me to this guy's Bachelor Party?
2003-03-03 01:57:12 AM  
Security guards? Church? Hmmm....
2003-03-03 01:59:27 AM  
well, it's not a real party til the cops show up, and this was a wedding, right?
all in all, i'd say it was a success. the mace was a nice touch.
2003-03-03 02:03:44 AM  
dunno why but what stuck out the most to me was that the 19 year old underage drinker has a 22 year old wife.
2003-03-03 02:12:10 AM  
Well, a wedding is a religious rite, not unlike any other rite, such as Passover. And arent' Jewish folk allowed to give wine to their underage chilluns at Passover?
2003-03-03 02:18:48 AM  
Very classy.
2003-03-03 02:40:11 AM  
Thank you,AtomicToad! NJ isn't as bad of a shaithole it's made out to be. I personally like it here. I've been to LI a few times and it is a shiattier version of NJ with lots more traffic.

/hate the Devils, tho
2003-03-03 02:40:23 AM  
has it occurred to anyone that maybe, just MAYBE he is a twice removed cousin from Ireland where it is legal for 19 yr olds to drink and he thought nothing of it
2003-03-03 02:42:07 AM  
Flamenco's wife, Elizabeth Osorio, 22, punched one of the guards in the back of the head

I need to find a woman like that.
2003-03-03 03:29:30 AM  
I have seen a bride at a reception get in to a floor rolling brawl with the grooms sister.. It was great. Hair and flowers flying every direction.. It was all because the grooms sister brought one of the brides ex boyfriends as a date to the wedding... All was fine until she started making out with him on the dance floor... shiat hit the fan shortly after that.. Divorce was a short 18 months later.. I love weddings, they bring out the best in everyone. lol
2003-03-03 03:32:03 AM  
Damn right!

Waitasec, was that headline meant to be sarcastic?
2003-03-03 03:37:56 AM  
look at all the crap that comes from beer.

ban it!

no..not really...but thats what alot of peeps on here say about guns.
2003-03-03 03:39:32 AM  
Irish Catholics . . . we put the "fun" in "funeral."

A horrible cliche . . . but kinda true.

My sister married a very nice guy from a very Boston Irish Catholic family. They literally cannot have a wedding or funeral without the cops showing up.

The on-duty cops, I mean, because of a complaint (a fight, usually). Of course, nine out of every ten guys in that family are cops, firefighters, or EMTs. They're great people, don't get me wrong, but I watch them carefully at parties.
2003-03-03 04:03:10 AM  
It's not a real party until They fire-bomb your house.
2003-03-03 04:32:24 AM  
No one reponded to the phone call?
I was phased out. sorry
2003-03-03 04:37:15 AM  
Here's a picture of Mr. Flamenco right after he was told they would no longer serve him alcohol:

If that doesn't work... here's the link:
2003-03-03 04:44:32 AM  
before i even stepped into this thread i was going to say it was either the southies from Boston.. or some Boricuas..

i was so close! :)

/minority from Mass
2003-03-03 06:29:02 AM  
Security guards? At a wedding? I think there's an element to this story that hasn't been printed. Normal weddings do not have security guards. Looks like this one needed them though.
2003-03-03 08:18:09 AM  
"It's not a good wedding until a fight breaks out"-

My uncle, holding the bar at his daughters wedding.
2003-03-03 08:21:37 AM  
Heh heh. My fiancee is going thru the planning of our wedding & reception. Gonna forward the article and this thread to her. Need more "wedding reception horror stories"!
2003-03-03 08:59:36 AM  
This idiot should have been kissing the bartender's ass for being allowed to drink anything!!

My niece was "shut off" at a wedding reception a few years back (she was 30 yrs old). We were in the grill room (bar) at the country club catching the World Series when one of the CC members challenged her to do a cartwheel in her gown (she was in the wedding party). Well, she did the cartwheel and they shut her off. The poor kid was FAR from drunk. Even the bride's mother tried to intervene saying she's known the girl for 20 years and that she wasn't even drunk, but no go.

They threatened to shut a bunch of other people off because they were outside with cocktails just talking to my niece. The powers that be thought we were giving her cocktails outside.

2003-03-03 09:10:44 AM  
In my family, we only get that violent when they try to play "The Chicken Dance."
2003-03-03 09:19:56 AM  
I first read the tagine as "angry dwarfs" instead of "angry drunks".
2003-03-03 09:55:50 AM  
My wedding reception didn't get REALLY rowdy until one of my friends smuggled in about a half-dozen bottles of Mad Dog.
2003-03-03 12:37:35 PM  
So there was a wedding in Ireland again?
2003-03-03 12:39:12 PM  
You had to smuggle liquor into your wedding?? What are ya, Mormon?
2003-03-03 12:51:21 PM  
Indeed, availability of alcohol should be a key part of wedding planning.

My wedding was at a hotel. This meant that we could start drinking at midday, keep drinking till 6am and all the guests only had to stagger upstairs to bed.
2003-03-03 01:30:35 PM  
Instant a-hole. Just add alcohol
2003-03-03 01:46:51 PM  
Damn. And I thought restaurant people were unruly when we get hitched. We finished the ceremony at noon, and we were still boozin' and schmoozin' at 1am. Lots of things were tossed around, there was a bird seed fight, my best friend and one of the cousins did get into a bartenders duel over margaritas that had most of the attendees woobly on their feet for several hours, I caught my Dad sneaking off with one of my new in-laws to get high, and at one point there was some good natured sparring on the lawn--but given that my Dad was a hand to hand instructor it was a good thing that left the participants winded but happy. Party wound down at the reception, and we all moved over to our place for another five hours of drinking and fun, but nothing was broken that couldn't be mended.

These folks. Damn.
2003-03-03 02:08:35 PM  
This is why my wedding consisted of eight people total, including my wife and myself. It only cost a few hundred dollars to pull off, and we didn't even have to rent a place out, as we had the wedding in the student center of our college- on the spot I proposed. It was really easy to pull off, and the only stress involved was when we had to tell our family that they weren't coming. And most of them were thankful. We got married in June and they all had many more weddings to attend. This just meant one less.

And the great thing about not spending a lot for your wedding is that you can have a great honeymoon and pull out all the stops.

When I read stories like this, I show my wife and we laugh and laugh. Weddings are for suckers. It's the effort that you put into the MARRIAGE that truly matters.
2003-03-03 02:23:10 PM  
This is AMUSING to you? I AMUSE you?

/Joe Pesci
2003-03-03 02:24:42 PM  
They just held a trial (I believe the guy was convicted) for a guy who killed somebody at a wedding in the Chicago area. Take that, Boston!
2003-03-03 02:34:29 PM  
Soporific--I thought I was the only sap to have the wedding where I proposed. Props to you sir.
2003-03-03 02:45:25 PM  
CBS or ABC puts my Big Fat Greek on TV while they ignore a goldmine of a family like this?

Damn, this is entertainment.
2003-03-03 03:50:03 PM  
well....whaddaya 'spect for a Long Island wedding. I thought this was just one of traditions.
2003-03-03 05:07:58 PM  
Look at the last name. You mean that dude was carrying a knife??? CALL RIPLEY!!!
2003-03-04 01:28:49 PM  

Mace and knives? What a bunch of wimps. I had to hold off all five of my bride's rejected suitors with my broadsword. While naked.

They invaded our 'honeymoon' suite while we were engaged in 'foreplay'. I took up my broadsword and waded in to these five rejected suitors who were drunk and only wear half-armor. I won, because they got in each other's way.

After my victory, my new bride was apparently really turned on by my prowess and forced me to prove my prowess on other fields.

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