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(Metro)   Zeus takes a very dim view of outdoor sex   (metro.co.uk) divider line 370
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25482 clicks; posted to Main » on 24 Jul 2009 at 7:28 AM (5 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2009-07-24 10:27:07 AM  
IXI Jim IXI: My 20-pounder likes to sleep on my chest and give me dreams of being in a mine collapse.

Kit is only 17 pounds, but a lot of fuzz!


LittleBlondeJug: More data, please.

To say the least I came in with a vengeance. I had several personal photos at my disposal and used them well. And I was punished swiftly and often.
 
2009-07-24 10:28:59 AM  
Didn't Zeus have a thing for virgins?

/Boys too, I suppose ...
 
2009-07-24 10:29:28 AM  
overlord_mike: geekluv:

You only have a shower & no bathtub? If so how the hell am I supposed to take a bubble bath at your place?

i have a tub, its just needs to be clean


I'll clean it for ya...

IXI Jim IXI: geekluv: .

I think your son wouldn't mind seeing boobies though..

What can I say? They train us young.


Does he grab for any woman's tits though? My nephew would do that when he was 4 (he is now 10 and still a boobs guy)
 
2009-07-24 10:29:44 AM  
That has the potential to leave the couple more grounded.
 
2009-07-24 10:30:05 AM  
littlett's: IXI Jim IXI: The cat actually went along with that for a few minutes before she let me know she wanted down with a claw to the cheek

Mine tries to smother me in my sleep.


LittleBlondeJug: I will if you will.

I'm probably still on the radar from a year ago, so I better play it safe.


I think the cats enjoy the sex smell.
 
2009-07-24 10:30:30 AM  
beelzebubba76: Didn't Zeus have a thing for virgins?

/Boys too, I suppose ...


He wasn't a Greek sailor...
 
2009-07-24 10:31:01 AM  
wademh
littlett's:
Nothing wrong with taking it outside, but sex in a parking lot or a somewhat public place also has the excitement of the prospect of being caught.

I particularly like the applause afterwards if you are caught.


Though I bet it gets bonus points in awkwardness if it's an afternoon during the summer holidays and you're at a crowded bathing lake in the inner-city forest and are caught by a teenager just entering vocal change who gets a kick out of shouting at the top of his lungs:
"Hey! Over here! There's two people f*cking!! Heeere!"

Maybe they were even going at it in or on the water; a couple of times I encountered skinny dippers making out (or more) in the water, but that's usually at dusk when it's a lot less crowded.
 
2009-07-24 10:31:38 AM  
maqtastic: littlett's: IXI Jim IXI: The cat actually went along with that for a few minutes before she let me know she wanted down with a claw to the cheek

Mine tries to smother me in my sleep.


LittleBlondeJug: I will if you will.

I'm probably still on the radar from a year ago, so I better play it safe.

I think the cats enjoy the sex smell.


I think dogs do too.
 
2009-07-24 10:31:50 AM  
littlett's: To say the least I came in with a vengeance. I had several personal photos at my disposal and used them well. And I was punished swiftly and often.

static.guim.co.uk
Naughty! Naughty! Naughty!
 
2009-07-24 10:32:38 AM  
LittleBlondeJug:
You only have a shower & no bathtub? If so how the hell are LittleBlondeJug and I supposed to take a bubble bath at your place?

FTFY.


now that would be a beautiful sight
 
2009-07-24 10:32:52 AM  
geekluv:

Does he grab for any woman's tits though? My nephew would do that when he was 4 (he is now 10 and still a boobs guy)


Nope. Of course, seeing he's not due until Aug 20th, I chalk that up more to an angle and lack of reach problem :D
 
2009-07-24 10:33:53 AM  
Shadow Blasko: Try 30lbs of snoring raccoon.

SO CUTE!!!
 
2009-07-24 10:34:50 AM  
If littleblondejug, geekluv and littlett are AWing, they win. This thread is somewhat appropriate for a fist of an angry god reference.
 
2009-07-24 10:34:59 AM  
Shadow Blasko: Try 30lbs of snoring raccoon.

I always get jealous of you...you get the best animals.
 
2009-07-24 10:35:00 AM  
beelzebubba76: maqtastic: littlett's: IXI Jim IXI: The cat actually went along with that for a few minutes before she let me know she wanted down with a claw to the cheek

Mine tries to smother me in my sleep.


LittleBlondeJug: I will if you will.

I'm probably still on the radar from a year ago, so I better play it safe.

I think the cats enjoy the sex smell.

I think dogs do too.


I think my old dog wouldn't have enjoyed the sex smell unless he was involved.

He would get really jealous when anyone would hug my girlfriend at the time.
 
2009-07-24 10:35:54 AM  
What hot outdoor amish sex might look like:

film.virtual-history.com

/You be careful out among the English.
 
2009-07-24 10:37:03 AM  
geekluv: ObscureNameHere: littlett's: theorellior: My nefarious plan has been more of a success than intended. The AWing has reached epic proportions not seen in months!

Sweetie, this isn't attention whoring. It has to get way more racy than this. For starters nobody has mentioned cup size, sexual preference, or personal grooming habits.

Or pudding flavour preference.

I got $240 dollars here, awwwwww yeaaahh....

$240 worth of pudding?


Worth of pudding. You know it baby. Just like it says on the package, I COOK, then I CHILL...awwww yeaaahh...
 
2009-07-24 10:37:36 AM  
geekluv: beelzebubba76: Didn't Zeus have a thing for virgins?

/Boys too, I suppose ...

He wasn't a Greek sailor...


For some strange reason that makes me want to hum lines from "Mack the Knife".
 
2009-07-24 10:39:41 AM  
ObscureNameHere:

Worth of pudding. You know it baby. Just like it says on the package, I COOK, then I CHILL...awwww yeaaahh...


i actually saw that episode of the state last week
 
2009-07-24 10:40:05 AM  
overlord_mike: LittleBlondeJug:
You only have a shower & no bathtub? If so how the hell are LittleBlondeJug and I supposed to take a bubble bath at your place?

FTFY.

now that would be a beautiful sight


you would die of a heart attack I bet.

ObscureNameHere: geekluv: ObscureNameHere: littlett's: theorellior: My nefarious plan has been more of a success than intended. The AWing has reached epic proportions not seen in months!

Sweetie, this isn't attention whoring. It has to get way more racy than this. For starters nobody has mentioned cup size, sexual preference, or personal grooming habits.

Or pudding flavour preference.

I got $240 dollars here, awwwwww yeaaahh....

$240 worth of pudding?


Worth of pudding. You know it baby. Just like it says on the package, I COOK, then I CHILL...awwww yeaaahh...


You took that right from "The State" show on MTV when it was still sorta good with music videos... now its all cat hurl.
 
2009-07-24 10:41:05 AM  
IXI Jim IXI: littlett's: To say the least I came in with a vengeance. I had several personal photos at my disposal and used them well. And I was punished swiftly and often.


Naughty! Naughty! Naughty!


Pretty much.

Mike should remember the cleavage shot that got me into trouble the most.
 
2009-07-24 10:41:44 AM  
IXI Jim IXI: Shadow Blasko: Try 30lbs of snoring raccoon.

I always get jealous of you...you get the best animals.


You only get to see the cute pics.

You see this ..

farm3.static.flickr.com

But not the 6 hours of gagging and yacking as we spent 7 hours cleaning maggots out of the poor baby's ears and open stomach wounds.

He lived. Most of our spring babies lived. Of course, now I have a house full of Procyon Lotorisms and little room to over-winter them all.

/The one that was sleeping on me is a permanent resident.
 
2009-07-24 10:41:49 AM  
IXI Jim IXI: geekluv:

Does he grab for any woman's tits though? My nephew would do that when he was 4 (he is now 10 and still a boobs guy)

Nope. Of course, seeing he's not due until Aug 20th, I chalk that up more to an angle and lack of reach problem :D


He does it while he is still in his mom... When he comes out & is mobile he's gonna do it... 8oP
 
2009-07-24 10:41:49 AM  
geekluv: overlord_mike: LittleBlondeJug:
You only have a shower & no bathtub? If so how the hell are LittleBlondeJug and I supposed to take a bubble bath at your place?

FTFY.

now that would be a beautiful sight

you would die of a heart attack I bet.



i seriously doubt it, but if i did i'd die with a smile on my face and my dick in my hand, is their any better way to go?
 
2009-07-24 10:41:55 AM  
Are most allusions made here from television and the cinema?

/Wish I had TV.
//But in Denmark now, so won't get anything interesting.
/Perhaps a good thing after all!
 
2009-07-24 10:42:18 AM  
dr zaius =/= zeus
 
2009-07-24 10:42:37 AM  
overlord_mike: geekluv: overlord_mike: LittleBlondeJug:
You only have a shower & no bathtub? If so how the hell are LittleBlondeJug and I supposed to take a bubble bath at your place?

FTFY.

now that would be a beautiful sight

you would die of a heart attack I bet.



i seriously doubt it, but if i did i'd die with a smile on my face and my dick in my hand, is their any better way to go?


die while having sex?
 
2009-07-24 10:44:46 AM  
geekluv: You only have a shower & no bathtub? If so how the hell am I supposed to take a bubble bath at your place?

I've got a wading pool and $400 worth of Gelli Baff at your disposal.
 
2009-07-24 10:45:16 AM  
geekluv: You took that right from "The State" show on MTV when it was still sorta good with music videos... now its all cat hurl.

I *DID*? What makes you say that? No, no, no, I just randomly assigned a coincidentally specific dollar value to desert food in a thread trending towards a discussion sexual fetishes. How dare you question my originality.
 
2009-07-24 10:46:23 AM  
beave315: If littleblondejug, geekluv and littlett are AWing, they win. This thread is somewhat appropriate for a fist of an angry god reference.

Which comes back to the Greek Sky Bully and the nekkid sex Germans.

/the circlejerk of life
 
2009-07-24 10:46:26 AM  
reilmb: dr zaius =/= zeus

That would make for a kickass re-imaging.

Kinda a "Who mourns for Adonis" meets "Planet of the Apes"

Wow ... My inner child is squealing in delight.
 
2009-07-24 10:46:29 AM  
Shadow Blasko: But not the 6 hours of gagging and yacking as we spent 7 hours cleaning maggots out of the poor baby's ears and open stomach wounds.

Yeah...well...let's stick with the finished goods. we'll leave the rest to you :D

geekluv: He does it while he is still in his mom... When he comes out & is mobile he's gonna do it... 8oP

I'm sure he does do it now. It's been creepy watching the limbs and head and stuff poking against my wife's belly now and then.

My friend caught her son the sign in sign language for breast or breast feeding or something, so he could tell her when he was hungry. I think I'm going to do that just so he'll be prepared to hit the strip clubs.
 
2009-07-24 10:46:50 AM  
Observatory: www.cropcircleconnector.com

penis goes where?
 
2009-07-24 10:47:00 AM  
overlord_mike: geekluv: overlord_mike: LittleBlondeJug:
You only have a shower & no bathtub? If so how the hell are LittleBlondeJug and I supposed to take a bubble bath at your place?

FTFY.

now that would be a beautiful sight

you would die of a heart attack I bet.



i seriously doubt it, but if i did i'd die with a smile on my face and my dick in my hand, is their any better way to go?


Oh, I can think of a better way to go.

: )
 
2009-07-24 10:47:01 AM  
littlett's:
Mike should remember the cleavage shot that got me into trouble the most.


not really to be honest, you sure i was there?


geekluv:

i seriously doubt it, but if i did i'd die with a smile on my face and my dick in my hand, is their any better way to go?

die while having sex?


true, but no girl wants to be remembered, for the rest of her, life as the girl whos vagina killed a man?
 
2009-07-24 10:48:12 AM  
overlord_mike: true, but no girl wants to be remembered, for the rest of her, life as the girl whos vagina killed a man?

[Insert private benjamin joke here]
 
2009-07-24 10:48:26 AM  
overlord_mike: not really to be honest, you sure i was there?

I'm hurt.

You don't remember the brown halter dress that showcased the girls rather well? :(
 
2009-07-24 10:50:01 AM  
overlord_mike: littlett's:
Mike should remember the cleavage shot that got me into trouble the most.

not really to be honest, you sure i was there?


geekluv:

i seriously doubt it, but if i did i'd die with a smile on my face and my dick in my hand, is their any better way to go?

die while having sex?

true, but no girl wants to be remembered, for the rest of her, life as the girl whos vagina killed a man?


Oh, I disagree. I think it would be awesome to be able to honestly say that I have a killer vagina.

: )
 
2009-07-24 10:50:59 AM  
littlett's: You don't remember the brown halter dress that showcased the girls rather well? :(

See...this is what I miss for spending all my time in the political threads...
 
2009-07-24 10:52:41 AM  
I think nothing beats the hand ... who knows you better than yourself?

It's logical.

/Hasn't been disproved, thus far.
 
2009-07-24 10:52:53 AM  
LittleBlondeJug: overlord_mike: geekluv: overlord_mike: LittleBlondeJug:
You only have a shower & no bathtub? If so how the hell are LittleBlondeJug and I supposed to take a bubble bath at your place?

FTFY.

now that would be a beautiful sight

you would die of a heart attack I bet.



i seriously doubt it, but if i did i'd die with a smile on my face and my dick in my hand, is their any better way to go?

Oh, I can think of a better way to go.

: )


Necrophiliac. Kinky.
 
2009-07-24 10:52:54 AM  
LittleBlondeJug: Oh, I disagree. I think it would be awesome to be able to honestly say that I have a killer vagina.

: )


There are far worse things to be know for. Breaking a man's manhood will get you a reputation.
 
2009-07-24 10:55:01 AM  
fanbladesaresharp: Stay. In. The. Car.

LittleBlondeJug: Not nearly as fun!

fanbladesaresharp: Says you. Get creative. And not get a gigawatt bolt up your ass. And stay dry too.

If you're having sex and stay dry, you're doing it wrong.
 
2009-07-24 10:55:37 AM  
LittleBlondeJug

Oh, you're at it again.

/I still want to see an open-mouthed smile.
 
2009-07-24 10:56:36 AM  
Shadow Blasko: geekluv: You only have a shower & no bathtub? If so how the hell am I supposed to take a bubble bath at your place?

I've got a wading pool and $400 worth of Gelli Baff at your disposal.


how you doin'? 8oP


ObscureNameHere: geekluv: You took that right from "The State" show on MTV when it was still sorta good with music videos... now its all cat hurl.

I *DID*? What makes you say that? No, no, no, I just randomly assigned a coincidentally specific dollar value to desert food in a thread trending towards a discussion sexual fetishes. How dare you question my originality.


Well the dollar amount wasn't right I think but you made me smile so you get an "A"..
 
2009-07-24 10:57:17 AM  
Is it just me, or does everyone else have a corollary to the "Godwin" rule that refers to AWing as "Littletting?"
 
2009-07-24 10:58:43 AM  
Why is it that all of the sex threads anymore are now AW threads?
 
2009-07-24 10:59:04 AM  
Sgian Dubh: Is it just me, or does everyone else have a corollary to the "Godwin" rule that refers to AWing as "Littletting?"

If I were a third as effective at AWing as Littlet's is, I'd have run out of things on my baby registry months ago :D
 
2009-07-24 11:00:19 AM  
IXI Jim IXI: Shadow Blasko: But not the 6 hours of gagging and yacking as we spent 7 hours cleaning maggots out of the poor baby's ears and open stomach wounds.

Yeah...well...let's stick with the finished goods. we'll leave the rest to you :D

geekluv: He does it while he is still in his mom... When he comes out & is mobile he's gonna do it... 8oP

I'm sure he does do it now. It's been creepy watching the limbs and head and stuff poking against my wife's belly now and then.

My friend caught her son the sign in sign language for breast or breast feeding or something, so he could tell her when he was hungry. I think I'm going to do that just so he'll be prepared to hit the strip clubs.


I would do that but I am afraid that my kid would then not talk when they are supposed to start talking. My fiance is afraid that when we have kids that their first sentence will be, "4 hour erection"...
 
2009-07-24 11:00:26 AM  
dragonchild: fanbladesaresharp: Stay. In. The. Car.

LittleBlondeJug: Not nearly as fun!

fanbladesaresharp: Says you. Get creative. And not get a gigawatt bolt up your ass. And stay dry too.

If you're having sex and stay dry, you're doing it wrong.


Depends where you're dry.
 
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