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(Brighton Argus)   Teacher gets drunk, climbs into trash container, gets crushed, becomes a has-bin   (theargus.co.uk ) divider line
    More: Dumbass  
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9189 clicks; posted to Main » on 15 Jul 2009 at 9:14 AM (7 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



71 Comments     (+0 »)
 


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2009-07-15 04:46:15 AM  
It's a damn shame when people be throwin' away a perfectly good white boy like that.

/This story is complete rubbish and I refuse to believe it.
//Seriously, what a waste.
 
2009-07-15 06:11:51 AM  

Simple XI: It's a damn shame when people be throwin' away a perfectly good white boy like that.

/This story is complete rubbish and I refuse to believe it.
//Seriously, what a waste.


///got trashed
 
2009-07-15 08:50:31 AM  
If only he'd had an astromech droid.
 
2009-07-15 09:00:39 AM  
How did I know this happened in the UK? Not only are the students always drunk there (including the primary school ones) but the teachers are always drunk. I knew it was a depressing place to live but wow, you have to be drunk 24/7 to tolerate living there?
 
2009-07-15 09:15:25 AM  
Top 3 worst ways to die. Ugh.

RIP, teacher dude. :(
 
2009-07-15 09:16:30 AM  

ExperianScaresCthulhu: Top 3 worst ways to die. Ugh.

RIP, teacher dude. :(


Buried Alive, slowly tortured to death, raped to death. Nope, not even in the top 25 I'd bet.
 
2009-07-15 09:17:07 AM  

Teacher gets drunk, climbs into trash container, gets crushed, becomes a has-bin


"How Not to Be Seen 101"
 
2009-07-15 09:17:29 AM  

Walker: How did I know this happened in the UK? Not only are the students always drunk there (including the primary school ones) but the teachers are always drunk. I knew it was a depressing place to live but wow, you have to be drunk 24/7 to tolerate living there?


If only there were a motherly but intrusive goverment entity within Great Britain that could pass sweeping laws to protect people from trash can accidents.
 
2009-07-15 09:17:31 AM  

Epiphany: ExperianScaresCthulhu: Top 3 worst ways to die. Ugh.

RIP, teacher dude. :(

Buried Alive, raped, slowly tortured to death, raped to death. Nope, not even in the top 25 I'd bet.


Sorry, FTFM.

/I like rape
 
2009-07-15 09:18:32 AM  
Shut down all the garbage mashers on the detention level!

Threepio, where are you?!?
 
2009-07-15 09:18:55 AM  

Walker: How did I know this happened in the UK? Not only are the students always drunk there (including the primary school ones) but the teachers are always drunk. I knew it was a depressing place to live but wow, you have to be drunk 24/7 to tolerate living there?


Naughty boys in nasty schools
Headmasters breaking all the rules
Having fun and playing fools
Smashing up the woodwork tools
All the teachers in the pub
Passing round the ready-rub
Trying not to think of when
The lunch-time bell will ring again.

/any excuse to post this
 
2009-07-15 09:20:42 AM  
I can haz bin?
 
2009-07-15 09:26:24 AM  
Is it wrong that my day has been made by the fact that "he was an inspiration to children," is immediately followed by "the teacher died after falling asleep in an industrial bin after a drinking into the early hours of Sunday morning"?
 
2009-07-15 09:29:14 AM  
Good night funny man.
 
2009-07-15 09:31:21 AM  
Alright, I have to ask, the article calls him a "maths" teacher two times. Is "maths" a mistake or is it something common in the "english" of the UK?

I'd believe either case since the article appears to have been written by a 3-year-old, "it's real shock to here of how he died. "
 
2009-07-15 09:33:04 AM  

crm114: Alright, I have to ask, the article calls him a "maths" teacher two times. Is "maths" a mistake or is it something common in the "english" of the UK?

I'd believe either case since the article appears to have been written by a 3-year-old, "it's real shock to here of how he died. "


Here is how they spell Hear in the UK. Drunk ass mothafarkaz.
 
2009-07-15 09:33:57 AM  
"Maths" is British English. They think it makes sense to keep the "s" on the end of "mathematics".
 
2009-07-15 09:38:27 AM  
The teacher died after falling asleep in an industrial bin after a drinking into the early hours of Sunday morning.

A drinking what? Is that a class or level of drinking? If so, he passed.

I don't understand how someone can look at a trash container and make the choice that it's a good place to grab a nap. Recently, wasn't there a lawyer or mayor found asleep in his own trash can outside his house? Fantastic picture of him snoozing in the can.
 
2009-07-15 09:39:50 AM  

Murgus618: I don't understand how someone can look at a trash container and make the choice that it's a good place to grab a nap.


Any port in a storm....
 
2009-07-15 09:41:37 AM  

crm114: Is it wrong that my day has been made by the fact that "he was an inspiration to children," is immediately followed by "the teacher died after falling asleep in an industrial bin after a drinking into the early hours of Sunday morning"?


hehehehehehehe
 
2009-07-15 09:44:09 AM  
This is devastating, I'm crushed.
 
2009-07-15 09:44:40 AM  
"A shock to (here) how he died." This is the state of gernalism in the UK? Pathetique.
 
2009-07-15 09:46:07 AM  
What a great role model for the kiddies. Lets make him seem like such a wonderful person so the kids can emulate him.

/doesn't actually care
//let Rome burn
 
2009-07-15 09:47:52 AM  
maybe he was mugged?
 
2009-07-15 09:50:14 AM  
♫ Crushed in the bin...
All we are is crushed in the bin ♫
 
2009-07-15 09:50:50 AM  
FTFA: "I just don't know what must have been going through his head to have got into a wheelie bin after a night out."

The side of the compactor perhaps?
 
hej
2009-07-15 09:53:13 AM  
Hide and seek world champion.
 
2009-07-15 09:54:46 AM  
The word mathematics is plural, therefore so is the shortened version. 'Math' is considered wrong by English folk. But you know, there are idiosyncrasies in either form of English. We could say that we, over here, kinda started it...... but at the same time I understand that if something is pronounced with a 'z' sound, it doesn't make any sense that we in England write synchronise, baptise, etc.

Also, Epiphany, "Here is how they spell Hear in the UK. Drunk ass mothafarkaz." - what? Just, what?


Lastly the point I came here to make: How come the bin men - sorry, refuse collectors - in England are fussy enough to spot a single beer bottle in my regular waste when it should be in my glass & tins box... but they fail to spot AN ENTIRE FARKING MAN.

Because I'd consider a man to be biodegradable waste so he should have been in the green wheelie bin.
 
2009-07-15 09:59:31 AM  

brownbread: what? Just, what?


It was a joke, you damn drunk Brittish bastard!
 
2009-07-15 10:00:16 AM  

crm114: Alright, I have to ask, the article calls him a "maths" teacher two times. Is "maths" a mistake or is it something common in the "english" of the UK?


It's always driven me crazy that they do that. I don't care if I'm being petty and ethnocentric. I hate it.

"I teach maths at university."

No, you teach MATH at THE university, you bloody snaggletoothed limey.
 
2009-07-15 10:01:00 AM  

Ambitwistor: "Maths" is British English. They think it makes sense to keep the "s" on the end of "mathematics".


I was told there would be less mass
 
2009-07-15 10:02:35 AM  

Richard Roma: No, you teach MATH at THE university, you bloody snaggletoothed limey.


Not any more. He's dead. It's "You taught maths...

/FTFM
 
2009-07-15 10:03:03 AM  
brownbread:

The word mathematics is plural, therefore so is the shortened version.

"Maths" is singular even in British English, despite the "s". "Mathematics" is a singular collective noun. However, the British "maths" does have an "s" in it because "mathematics" does.
 
2009-07-15 10:03:45 AM  

ElPresidente: He's dead. It's "You taught tought maths...


Sorry, pet peeve.
 
2009-07-15 10:08:38 AM  
When I hear about a body found in a trash container, I always wonder if they'll take up a collection for the family.
 
2009-07-15 10:09:48 AM  

I_Can't_Believe_it's_not_Boutros: When I hear about a body found in a trash container, I always wonder if they'll take up a collection for the family.


What if they refuse?
 
2009-07-15 10:10:00 AM  
If a guy get's squashed in a trash compactor it's more of a haz-mat bin.

/Lame, I know.
 
2009-07-15 10:10:40 AM  

Epiphany: brownbread: what? Just, what?

It was a joke, you damn drunk Brittish bastard!


OH so it is.

And, collective - good point. Yes. Collective.
 
2009-07-15 10:13:04 AM  
His students thought he made quite an impression.
 
2009-07-15 10:14:11 AM  

Murgus618: I don't understand how someone can look at a trash container and make the choice that it's a good place to grab a nap

put your passed out friend in as a joke after a night of drinking.

FTFY
 
2009-07-15 10:14:56 AM  

Epiphany: ElPresidente: He's dead. It's "You taught tought maths...

Sorry, pet peeve.


I tought I saw a puddy cat?
 
2009-07-15 10:16:00 AM  

Epiphany


I_Can't_Believe_it's_not_Boutros: When I hear about a body found in a trash container, I always wonder if they'll take up a collection for the family.

What if they refuse?


They're in waste management. I think they'll make them an offer they can't refuse.
 
2009-07-15 10:16:49 AM  
To be fair on the whole "at University" verses "as the University" debate.... American English allows this as well... "School" and "College" are treated in the US exactly the same way "University" is in UK English. Why American's don't extend this to "University" is a mystery.
 
2009-07-15 10:17:02 AM  
FYI, Brighton is also the gay capital of the country, England's San Francisco. Pretty good bet he may have been gay.
 
2009-07-15 10:18:06 AM  

Englebert Slaptyback: Epiphany

I_Can't_Believe_it's_not_Boutros: When I hear about a body found in a trash container, I always wonder if they'll take up a collection for the family.

What if they refuse?


They're in waste management. I think they'll make them an offer they can't refuse.


All you did was repeat the pun I made but with an extra sentence explaining it.
 
2009-07-15 10:19:01 AM  

ElPresidente: San Francisco


If San Francisco really was the gay capitol of the USA, don't you think gays would be allowed to legally marry there?

They do have the gayest street in the USA though.
 
2009-07-15 10:19:09 AM  
In TFA's header, I read "Bin Lorry" as "Bin Laden"... must be time for more coffee.
 
2009-07-15 10:20:17 AM  

huntercr: To be fair on the whole "at University" verses "as the University" debate.... American English allows this as well... "School" and "College" are treated in the US exactly the same way "University" is in UK English. Why American's don't extend this to "University" is a mystery.


We don't refer to higher education as "university," we just refer to it as "school" or "college." Thus, when we use the word "university" we are almost always referring to a specific institution and thus we say "the university."
 
2009-07-15 10:21:40 AM  

Epiphany


Englebert Slaptyback: Epiphany

I_Can't_Believe_it's_not_Boutros: When I hear about a body found in a trash container, I always wonder if they'll take up a collection for the family.

What if they refuse?


They're in waste management. I think they'll make them an offer they can't refuse.

All you did was repeat the pun I made but with an extra sentence explaining it.


I thought you were tying 'collection' with 'refuse' (REF-use vs re-FUSE), as in 'refuse collection'. A thousand pardons, please. Or one. Or piss off. Whichever works.

:-)
 
2009-07-15 10:22:47 AM  
images2.wikia.nocookie.net

"Who can take your trash out?
Stomp it down for you?
Shake the plastic bag and do the twisty thingy too?"
 
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