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(Newsweek)   Attorney General Holder announces discovery of President Obama's missing testicles   (newsweek.com) divider line 270
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7357 clicks; posted to Politics » on 12 Jul 2009 at 5:20 AM (5 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2009-07-12 01:20:36 AM
That was the plan all along.
That's the ticket.
 
2009-07-12 01:24:49 AM
Please please please let them do this. I can understand the impulse of the Obama administration not to provoke even more WHAARRGARBL from the Republicans by aggressively going after Bush, but things are ridiculous. We now now that Bush's wiretapping program far exceeded anything he's owned up to, and that there was a secret CIA program so horrifying that Cheney explicitly ordered it to be a secret from even members of congress.

More than likely, either George W. Bush or Dick Cheney (or both) broke the law. And if they did, they need to be brought to justice. W always said that he wished to be viewed in the lens of history, that in retrospect he would be seen as a bringer of freedom. If he's not prosecuted, it only furthers his claim that he did nothing wrong. This is the Obama administrations chance to say that civil liberties and a respect of the separation of powers matters. Don't let history vindicate a tyrant.

It doesn't need to be partisan (i.e. it shouldn't be an issue that Democrats feverishly rally around). It shouldn't be a show trial. But there should be an investigation and a reluctance to pardon when wrongdoing is found.
 
2009-07-12 01:26:20 AM
Also, Newsweek sucks. Clearly the big story here is Holder's openness to prosecute Bush. This can be easily found... followed 4 pages of anecdotes about his personality and what his wife is like.
 
2009-07-12 01:40:52 AM
wpcontent.answers.com
I thought I'd just point this out: his eyes are scaring me. Obama doesn't stand a chance against this guy.
 
2009-07-12 02:00:33 AM
And there was much rejoicing.
 
2009-07-12 02:11:43 AM
Obama found his testicles because Eric Holder decided to do something?

Um...well, truth be told, I haven't seen Obama and Eric Holder in the same place at the same time, so they COULD be the same guy...
 
2009-07-12 02:45:59 AM
Did Jesse Jackson have them?
 
2009-07-12 02:58:29 AM
I'll believe it when I see it.
 
2009-07-12 03:50:21 AM
good.
 
2009-07-12 05:09:33 AM
Well good!!! Luckily, we don't have anything else pressing right now and we can devote our government time, money, and energy towards things that won't matter at the end of the "road"! Nothing will happen except things will be "discovered" that will tell us what we already know, while - at the same time - it will keep the ignorant masses so involved that they will forget all about losing their houses, cars, and jobs...

Hey...but at least they can blame Bush, who will still be on his ranch feeding his horses.
 
2009-07-12 05:27:12 AM
steelpeg: Well good!!! Luckily, we don't have anything else pressing right now and we can devote our government time, money, and energy towards things that won't matter at the end of the "road"! Nothing will happen except things will be "discovered" that will tell us what we already know, while - at the same time - it will keep the ignorant masses so involved that they will forget all about losing their houses, cars, and jobs...

Hey...but at least they can blame Bush, who will still be on his ranch feeding his horses.


I'm sorry, but I get the feeling that you're equating a circus type trial over a blowjob versus the unwarranted war and murder of 4,000 American Servicemen, a Million or so Iraqi Casualties, untold damage to American credibility at home and abroad, Guantanamo Bay, (another filthy permanent stain on American history...joining Jim Crowe, Slavery, Internment of the Japanese, extermination of the Indian people...and so forth and onward....), and a domestic spy program that would impress Orwell...

So yeah, forgive me if I'm a tad upset and want to see some of these motherfarkers put in jail where they belong.

You know what's cool about America? It's when we put smart people in charge, shiat gets done. That's what we did. We put some smart people in charge, so yeah, don't you worry, shiat's gonna get done.
 
2009-07-12 05:27:24 AM
Doak: Dick Cheney
steelpeg: blame Bush


www.dvorak.org
 
2009-07-12 05:27:42 AM
Paris1127: I thought I'd just point this out: his eyes are scaring me. Obama doesn't stand a chance against this guy.

His eyes are too far apart, I think is your problem. Either his face is too wide on top, or he was hit with an axe as a child and the facial reconstruction didn't take.
 
2009-07-12 05:31:22 AM
Paris1127: I thought I'd just point this out: his eyes are scaring me. Obama doesn't stand a chance against this guy.

His eyes? I'm scared of his 'stache.
 
2009-07-12 05:32:15 AM
I look forward to reading the strongly worded letter that these investigations will produce.
 
2009-07-12 05:33:00 AM
steelpeg: Well good!!! Luckily, we don't have anything else pressing right now and we can devote our government time, money, and energy towards things that won't matter at the end of the "road"! Nothing will happen except things will be "discovered" that will tell us what we already know, while - at the same time - it will keep the ignorant masses so involved that they will forget all about losing their houses, cars, and jobs...

Hey...but at least they can blame Bush, who will still be on his ranch feeding his horses.


1/10

Perhaps we should forgive ALL CRIMES, for everybody, and punish nothing, because they're all in the past, and we have too many important things on the table right now.

"The ignorant masses" wouldn't have to worry so much about "losing their houses, cars, and jobs..." in the first place if it weren't for morons like yourself, and your blind worship of the criminals you trusted to act in your own best interests.

Hey, just for the hell of it, why don't we distract "the ignorant masses" and spend over $60million to investigate a possible consentual blow job?

Seriously, what the hell is wrong with you?
 
2009-07-12 05:33:41 AM
Sounds like a start. A much needed, what-the-hell-took-so-long start.
 
2009-07-12 05:35:16 AM
steelpeg: Luckily, we don't have anything else pressing right now and we can devote our government time, money, and energy towards things that won't matter at the end of the "road"!

img1.fark.net It is possible for governments to do more than one thing at any particular time
 
2009-07-12 05:37:56 AM
bersl2: Paris1127: I thought I'd just point this out: his eyes are scaring me. Obama doesn't stand a chance against this guy.

His eyes? I'm scared of his 'stache.


This

/or tache
 
2009-07-12 05:39:35 AM
Lando Lincoln: Obama found his testicles because Eric Holder decided to do something?

Um...well, truth be told, I haven't seen Obama and Eric Holder in the same place at the same time, so they COULD be the same guy...


Oh sure, they all look the same to you, don't they?
 
2009-07-12 05:57:29 AM
Wow! I'm taking bets!!! Gotta lot of fishes out there who actually are stupid enough to think that something will come of this!

In American history, tell me when ANYTHING happened to a President (sitting or not) or high-ranking staff after one of this BS "inquiries"? Remember Vietnam, a country we weren't even "responsible" for when we got involved and 58,000+ Americans died? Remember Nixon? Remember WWII when we went after Hitler FIRST after JAPAN attacked Pearl Harbor? On, and on, and on....

Give me a break! If any of you guys really think something substantial will come of this then you are just being little, innocent lambs in the woods and shouldn't be up at this hour...
 
2009-07-12 06:02:21 AM
Good. Let's get it over with and put it behind us.
 
2009-07-12 06:09:16 AM
steelpeg: In American history, tell me when ANYTHING happened to a President (sitting or not) or high-ranking staff after one of this BS "inquiries"? Remember Vietnam, a country we weren't even "responsible" for when we got involved and 58,000+ Americans died? Remember Nixon? Remember WWII when we went after Hitler FIRST after JAPAN attacked Pearl Harbor? On, and on, and on....

Gob, tell him what he's won?
 
2009-07-12 06:13:57 AM
steelpeg: Wow! I'm taking bets!!! Gotta lot of fishes out there who actually are stupid enough to think that something will come of this!

In American history, tell me when ANYTHING happened to a President (sitting or not) or high-ranking staff after one of this BS "inquiries"? Remember Vietnam, a country we weren't even "responsible" for when we got involved and 58,000+ Americans died? Remember Nixon? Remember WWII when we went after Hitler FIRST after JAPAN attacked Pearl Harbor? On, and on, and on....

Give me a break! If any of you guys really think something substantial will come of this then you are just being little, innocent lambs in the woods and shouldn't be up at this hour...


Yes, nothing has ever been revealed by an independent counsel investigation.

/the stupid, it hurts...
 
2009-07-12 06:14:51 AM
Etchy333:
Did Jesse Jackson have them?

No, Michael, but he's done with them.
 
2009-07-12 06:16:11 AM
Paris1127: I thought I'd just point this out: his eyes are scaring me.

Holy shiat you're right. The damn things were jumping out at me before I even read your comment.
 
2009-07-12 06:18:37 AM
Doak: Also, Newsweek sucks. Clearly the big story here is Holder's openness to prosecute Bush. This can be easily found... followed 4 pages of anecdotes about his personality and what his wife is like.

I noticed that too. I skimmed to the bottom of page 1, and then gave up.
 
2009-07-12 06:27:14 AM
Rickerkioz:
I'm sorry, but I get the feeling that you're equating a circus type trial over a blowjob versus the unwarranted war and murder of 4,000 American Servicemen, a Million or so Iraqi Casualties, untold damage to American credibility at home and abroad, Guantanamo Bay, (another filthy permanent stain on American history...joining Jim Crowe, Slavery, Internment of the Japanese, extermination of the Indian people...and so forth and onward....), and a domestic spy program that would impress Orwell...

Murdering American servicemen? Histrionic often?

And, for the record, it's not about the blowjob -- at least not for me. If President Dicknose had said "None of your goddam business" when asked about it, I'd have supported him in that. He didn't.

As a sitting President of the United States, he VOLUNTARILY appeared before a federal grand jury, took an oath, and lied his ass off. Just to save the "but... buts" he admitted he lied later. Okay? That is a FELONY.

And, if you can't believe someone who is the sitting President of the United States, appearing voluntarily, under oath, in front of a federal grand jury, is there ANY circumstance under which you can trust him?

What Martha Stewart did was perfectly legal -- right up to the point where she lied about it to federal investigators. She spent time in jail. When is admitted, but un-convicted, felon Bill Clinton going to do his time?

Are you going to be okay with a witch hunt of Obama when he's out of office?

Gen. Jim
 
2009-07-12 06:27:42 AM
Subby (and other idiots in this thread): the DOJ prosecutes people, the president doesn't decide who doesn't and who get prosecuted for crimes, you are a dumbass.
 
2009-07-12 06:28:11 AM
ThunderPelvis: Yes, nothing has ever been revealed by an independent counsel investigation.

"Things" may be "revealed," but nothing else is going to come of this effort. I think steelpeg is exactly right.

/the stupid, it hurts...

Naivete is painful too, unfortunately.
 
2009-07-12 06:28:52 AM
GeneralJim: And, for the record, it's not about the blowjob -- at least not for me. If President Dicknose had said "None of your goddam business" when asked about it, I'd have supported him in that. He didn't.

HE DID, But republicans in congress at the time said they would impeach him if he didn't go under oath.


You are rewriting history.
 
2009-07-12 06:31:41 AM
GeneralJim: And, if you can't believe someone who is the sitting President of the United States, appearing voluntarily, under oath, in front of a federal grand jury, is there ANY circumstance under which you can trust him?

Psst perjury is not just "lying under oath". You really have no clue what you are talking about.

He was NEVER convicted for perjury. He never committed a felony.

You are full of crap.
 
2009-07-12 06:33:27 AM
GeneralJim: As a sitting President of the United States, he VOLUNTARILY appeared before a federal grand jury, took an oath, and lied his ass off. Just to save the "but... buts" he admitted he lied later. Okay? That is a FELONY.

And by "VOLUNTARILY" you mean under threat of impeachment if he didn't.


And you have no clue what perjury is.

and he was never convicted for perjury so he never committed a felony.

Can you be any more wrong?
 
2009-07-12 06:35:00 AM
Corvus: Subby (and other idiots in this thread): the DOJ prosecutes people, the president doesn't decide who doesn't and who get prosecuted for crimes, you are a dumbass.

Well, that wasn't true under the last president. That's one of the problems..
 
2009-07-12 06:41:31 AM
I think everyone in the entire world should calm down.
 
2009-07-12 06:55:10 AM
"The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing."
 
2009-07-12 07:00:06 AM
paygun: I look forward to reading the strongly worded letter that these investigations will produce.

+1
 
2009-07-12 07:04:30 AM
HOLDER! HOLDER! He's our man!
If he can't do it, No one can!


...Literally, it seems.
 
2009-07-12 07:08:15 AM
Cantih: "The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing."

How much for the womens??!!
 
2009-07-12 07:13:55 AM
Sun God: Cantih: "The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing."

How much for the womens??!!


Sorry, don't get the reference.
 
2009-07-12 07:28:16 AM
 
2009-07-12 07:30:13 AM
GeneralJim: Are you going to be okay with a witch hunt of Obama when he's out of office?

There already is a witch hunt of Obama. But yes, I'm fine with him being held accountable.

Besides, he'd really have to pull out some doozies to compare to the corruption of the last 8 years. I get the feeling that if this thing goes through, we are going to see lots of dirt on things we never thought possible by the highest levels of government.
 
2009-07-12 07:47:14 AM
GeneralJim: Are you going to be okay with a witch hunt of Obama when he's out of office?

If Obama uses trumped up intelligence to start a war for false reasons that ends up lasting years longer than they planned and kills 5000 American soldiers, I have no doubt the likes of you will be calling for his head and denouncing him for ruining America.

The amazing thing? I'll be right next to you denouncing him.

But please, continue to call out Clinton while you defend the past 8 years.
 
2009-07-12 07:47:39 AM
Sun God: I think everyone in the entire world should calm down.

That's what the weed is for.
 
2009-07-12 07:55:14 AM
Doak: More than likely, either George W. Bush or Dick Cheney (or both) broke the law.

I'm pretty sure ordering Card and Gonzo to urge Ashcroft to illegally sign a document was against the law.
 
2009-07-12 07:56:06 AM
I'll believe it when I see it.
 
2009-07-12 07:56:38 AM
Hobodeluxe: I'm pretty sure ordering Card and Gonzo to urge Ashcroft to illegally sign a document was against the law.

Well, it's not like Ashcroft gave anyone a blowjob in the west wing.
 
2009-07-12 07:59:37 AM
bulldg4life: Hobodeluxe: I'm pretty sure ordering Card and Gonzo to urge Ashcroft to illegally sign a document was against the law.

Well, it's not like Ashcroft gave anyone a blowjob in the west wing.


Mind Bleach!
 
2009-07-12 08:00:15 AM
Sun God: I think everyone in the entire world should calm down.

THIS will never happen...
 
2009-07-12 08:01:24 AM
Sun God: It's a joke as old and worn out as your quote, and just as funny.

Well, then it's a good thing I wasn't even attempting to be funny.

Also, what the fark is up with my name? It seems to break the html of half the people who respond to me.
 
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