FARK.com: (4497463) Our nation is suffering a Slim Jim shortage due to an explosion at the Slim Jim factory last month. And yet still Obama does nothing

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(Greasy Meat Stick News)		Our nation is suffering a Slim Jim shortage due to an explosion at the Slim Jim factory last month. And yet still Obama does nothing (seriouseats.com)		91
		More: Scary

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6186 clicks; posted to Main » on 08 Jul 2009 at 8:09 PM | Favorite | share:

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Adjective Bird Whiskey

2009-07-08 04:11:37 PM

Oh no, I might have to buy real beef jerky.

I Said

2009-07-08 04:14:08 PM

My fault everyone.

I was at the factory, took 4 of them, SNAPPED them in my mouth at once, and force of the snap not only blew up the factory, but gave Macho Man a minor concussion as well.

deadapostle

2009-07-08 04:14:13 PM

Barack Obama doesn't care about white trash.

oldfarthenry

2009-07-08 04:14:46 PM

So that's what got up Victoria Jackson's ass - or rather what didn't get up there recently.

deadapostle

2009-07-08 04:14:54 PM

I Said: I was at the factory, took 4 of them, SNAPPED them in my mouth at once, and force of the snap not only blew up the factory, but gave Macho Man a minor concussion as well.

We're only glad you didn't go for 5. That would have ripped a hole in the space-time continuum.

Hagbardr

2009-07-08 04:16:07 PM

Don't worry ladies.

There's plenty of my greasy meat stick to go around.

Wildcat3

2009-07-08 04:19:12 PM

Oh, Boy, OBERTO'S!

jchic

2009-07-08 04:23:45 PM

oldfarthenry: So that's what got up Victoria Jackson's ass - or rather what didn't get up there recently.

Thanks, that made me laugh.

Heroic Poser

2009-07-08 04:34:28 PM

Yet the Macho Man does nothing also.

Rev.K

2009-07-08 04:35:10 PM

Greasy Meat Stick News?

Is it too late to change my Fark login?

GreenAdder

2009-07-08 04:43:17 PM

You need a stimulus plan? Snap into it!

serpent_sky

2009-07-08 04:51:43 PM

And yet, the guys in my band seem to have no problem finding it when we're going to practice, stinking up my car with that stuff every single time.

Is that totally, officially a food that can only be stomached by males or something? Just smelling it makes me nauseous.

Donald_McRonald

2009-07-08 04:55:58 PM

serpent_sky: Is that totally, officially a food that can only be stomached by males or something? Just smelling it makes me nauseous.

I think Steve Albini started the trend.

Adjective Bird Whiskey

2009-07-08 04:58:06 PM

serpent_sky: And yet, the guys in my band seem to have no problem finding it when we're going to practice, stinking up my car with that stuff every single time.

Is that totally, officially a food that can only be stomached by males or something? Just smelling it makes me nauseous.

I admit the stuff is gross but I still crave it from time to time. It's meat. Mmm meat.

Grote-Man

2009-07-08 05:04:18 PM

Adjective Bird Whiskey: I admit the stuff is gross but I still crave it from time to time. It's meat. Mmm meat.

Is "mechanically separated chicken" really still meat?

tallguywithglasseson

2009-07-08 05:07:47 PM

Thanks for nothing, Obama.

theorellior

2009-07-08 05:11:21 PM

SNAP INTO A SLIM JIM!!!

beerrun

2009-07-08 05:36:14 PM

And Wayne Static still did nothing.

LiteCheesyPoofs

2009-07-08 05:54:59 PM

Meh. We switched to this a few months ago.

i.walmartimages.com

/bacon vs. Slim Jim = no contest

Boritom

2009-07-08 06:15:23 PM

Chuck Norris doesn't snap into a Slim Jim...

...he makes them snap themselves into him!

Winktologist

2009-07-08 06:26:10 PM

I heard the Kool-Aid Man ate one and caused this.

North Korea is starting research into their own Kool-Aid Jim Bomb as we speak, as it seems to be more effective than their nuclear tests.

Winktologist

2009-07-08 06:26:48 PM

Grote-Man: Adjective Bird Whiskey: I admit the stuff is gross but I still crave it from time to time. It's meat. Mmm meat.

Is "mechanically separated chicken" really still meat?

Yes.

DFWPhotoGuy

2009-07-08 06:39:38 PM

I read the headline and chortled so hard I blew spit all over my monitors. To celebrate this achievement in laughitutde I will enjoy my...
ah.pricegrabber.com

LiteCheesyPoofs

2009-07-08 06:40:34 PM

NittLion78: That tear looks shopped to me. It should be coming out of the eye towards his nose. I know this because I have made many eagles cry in my day. Especially baby eagles.

johnsoninca

2009-07-08 07:13:48 PM

This guy is particularly pissed...

TSD

2009-07-08 07:14:50 PM

there is no jerky like venison jerky....oh yeah

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener

2009-07-08 07:40:38 PM

It must have been one of those explosions of flavor that I've heard so much about...

dumbandilikeit

2009-07-08 07:42:34 PM

The plant is in my area (central NC). Didn't realize it was the only SlimJim factory in the country. That plant is a mess from the explosion. I'm now expecting SlimJim riots by about September.

Dont Call Me Shirley

2009-07-08 08:13:39 PM

stickin to my own homegrown jerkey... not a greasy and can controll the sodium

TheShavingofOccam123

2009-07-08 08:15:35 PM

i makes my own jerky using Kroger brand Jerk Sauce. Damn dat is good stuff.

Kanemano

2009-07-08 08:16:03 PM

When will our national nightmare end?

CaptSacto

2009-07-08 08:17:00 PM

serpent_sky: And yet, the guys in my band seem to have no problem finding it when we're going to practice, stinking up my car with that stuff every single time.

Is that totally, officially a food that can only be stomached by males or something? Just smelling it makes me nauseous.

You've obviously never experienced the olfactory assault that is pickled pigs feet.

Slim Jim's aren't even in that gross league.

eggi541

2009-07-08 08:18:16 PM

Every couple of years I try a Slim Jim, gives me the squirts...Will not even shed a tear over any supposed shortage. I am sure that there is some warehouse filled with some 10 year old stock, not like anyone can tell the difference. Think it has a 100 year shelf-life.

TheShavingofOccam123

2009-07-08 08:18:49 PM

Winktologist: Grote-Man: Adjective Bird Whiskey: I admit the stuff is gross but I still crave it from time to time. It's meat. Mmm meat.

Is "mechanically separated chicken" really still meat?

Yes.

Those chickens must have really loved each other.

scolazz

2009-07-08 08:19:21 PM

there is something special about the slim jim that comes with the stick of orange cheese. I can't resist that anytime I see it.

tweekster

2009-07-08 08:20:25 PM

DFWPhotoGuy: I read the headline and chortled so hard I blew spit all over my monitors. To celebrate this achievement in laughitutde I will enjoy my...

www.cs.mcgill.ca

orly?

/yes i know its an emu, but its close enough.

amanogowa

2009-07-08 08:21:07 PM

Subby, subby, subby -- Dubya was the redneck president that would care about trailer park food.

CaptSacto

2009-07-08 08:23:55 PM

TheShavingofOccam123: Winktologist: Grote-Man: Adjective Bird Whiskey: I admit the stuff is gross but I still crave it from time to time. It's meat. Mmm meat.

Is "mechanically separated chicken" really still meat?

Yes.

Those chickens must have really loved each other.

Did they try a hose?

drjekel_mrhyde

2009-07-08 08:24:24 PM

TSD: there is no jerky like ~~venison~~Human baby jerky....oh yeah

Solty Dog

2009-07-08 08:24:58 PM

That would explain why I couldn't find any for my trip up the coast. Had to resort to trail mix. Frickin' hippie food.

mediablitz

2009-07-08 08:26:21 PM

serpent_sky: Is that totally, officially a food that can only be stomached by males or something? Just smelling it makes me nauseous.

My daughter thinks it is the greatest food ever invented. I tell her it isn't food, but that doesn't stop her.

So I guess it isn't just a guy thing, unless my daughter has been hiding a secret for 19 years.

duhbLow7

2009-07-08 08:27:38 PM

the number 2 ingredient in slim jims...mechanically separated chicken. OBAMA, WHERE ELSE CAN I GET MY CHICKEN SEPARATED MECHANICALLY>?

Wrackspurt

2009-07-08 08:30:50 PM

deadapostle: Barack Obama doesn't care about white trash.

Is this the part where I respond by saying "bet he'd have cared if it had been Kentucky Fried Chicken HQ," and everyone will be cool with that because if it's okay to joke about one ethnic minority, it's okay to joke about them all?

Just wondering...

Snarcoleptic_Hoosier

2009-07-08 08:32:55 PM

Rest assured fellow farkers, for I have been jerking extra meat to meet demand.

/Only comes in bite-size

Rod Blagojevich

2009-07-08 08:35:01 PM

okami36

2009-07-08 08:35:23 PM

Obama's too busy messin' with Sasquatch.

cowgirl toffee

2009-07-08 08:40:49 PM

Obama doesn't care about white-people snacks.

haterade

2009-07-08 08:41:13 PM

america's jails are suffering...SUFFERING!!

tweekster

2009-07-08 08:49:33 PM

Wrackspurt: deadapostle: Barack Obama doesn't care about white trash.

Is this the part where I respond by saying "bet he'd have cared if it had been Kentucky Fried Chicken HQ," and everyone will be cool with that because if it's okay to joke about one ethnic minority, it's okay to joke about them all?

Just wondering...

Except with KFC you are making fun of white trash again.
Next time say popeyes.

/hungry for popeyes now.

findthefish

2009-07-08 08:50:37 PM

Yeah....gotta have my Slim Jim fix here and there. I swear when I was kid, they had a tube of fat in the middle. Much leaner now.

/Mechanically s-e-p-a-r-a-t-e-d chicken

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